OT: At What Age Did You Pierce Your Daughter's Ears?

[meandtheguys2]

Well, it is extreme, but I think her point is that we have to admit that we are allowing our child to feel some level of pain in order to impose our idea of beauty and fashion on them. It is purely for cosmetic reasons, and so really is a selfish decision. Same reason why people start stretching their daughter's necks in other countries as babies. Again, an extreme example, but it is the same reasoning.

I am not saying it is evil, you automatically join the "bad mom club," I'm just saying, it's not a medical necessity.

Exactly. Baby pain doesn't count. Funny enough, it is the people who don't want their children to "remember" the pain that amaze me. If the pain is so memorable, why on earth would you subject an infant to it? just so you can show off your good taste in earings. Buy a dollbaby, for heaven's sake.

 

[beattyfamily]

What amazes me is how nasty and insulting some are when they have a different opinion than others. How they 'think' their opinion is the 'right' opinion to have.

Its such a bummer that people can't just answer the question and not put down others for their decisions and differing opinions.

I waited till my DD was 10 and she asked for them BUT I don't put down or begrudge those who have it done when their child is a baby. For many this is a custom.

I also cannot believe some of the comparisions.

 

[meandtheguys2]

It is amazing, isn't it, how people can give an opposing opinion, and be mocked, etc.

Analogies are useful in life...it is a darn shame they took them off of the SATs!

 

[TheDizMom]

It is a personal choice by all means. Every family is different, however I think some of these opinions are getting a bit off topic. My daughter had a cyst cut out just above her eyebrow as a baby, should I have not done this because she didn't say it was ok (it wasn't hurting her)? My son get c-sized, should I have waited? It's a small hole in each ear. If the child/adult didn't like it she could just take out the earrings. I have 4 holes in each ear, and I only wear earrings in the bottom, I don't feel that I HAVE to wear them in every hole. If your DH or DW feel ok with it by every mean get it done. I LOVE seeing my little girl with earrings, and just to let you know not everyone in my family agreed with it. But it's our daughter, and we knew it wasn't something that she was going to need therapy for later jen

I am not trying to offend anyone. Just wanted to make that clear. I think the poster just wanted to know at what age your child got it done

I totally agree with you. Let us not make this into a situation of personal beliefs and mutilation. Mutilation is something that happens to girls in some African nations when they are circumcised, it hardly compares. My son had a cist removed from above his eyebrow too and tubes put in his ears at 15 months. Should I have waited til he was old enough to decide for himself if he wanted holes cut in his eardrums and potentially lost some of his hearing. I think not. It's pierced ears for heavens sake and it's certainly better than some little girls I have seen being dressed like teenagers and having their hair bleached because mom really wanted a blonde.

 

[kribit]

What amazes me is how nasty and insulting some are when they have a different opinion than others. How they 'think' their opinion is the 'right' opinion to have.

Its such a bummer that people can't just answer the question and not put down others for their decisions and differing opinions.

I waited till my DD was 10 and she asked for them BUT I don't put down or begrudge those who have it done when their child is a baby. For many this is a custom.

I also cannot believe some of the comparisions.

I've been reading this thread and have to agree with you 100%. The insults really have to go.

 

[TheDizMom]

yes, that's how it began but somehow piercing a baby girl's ears was considered by some as equivalent to piercing a baby's tongue, stretching its neck, and mutilating its privates.
Just call me "Mommy the Mutilator"
ps. My cat is declawed too!
surely I'll be on the "Hell Express"

I absolutely love your sense of humor . We think so much alike. Daughter's ears pierced at 31/2 months, son circumcised, cat soon to be declawed. I'll see you in hell
another "Mommy Mutilator"

 

[pperfectmom]

I hate to get involved, but that little devil on my shoulder just can't resist. If we're keeping score here #1 Son was most emphatically NOT circumsized #2 DD will have pierced ears when she wants as long as she's older than 10(years that is ). And last, but not least #3 I would never declaw a cat . These are all my personal choices.

 

[WildGrits]

What purpose is there for putting holes in a small child's ears? It just is an intrusive way for mom's to decorate them.

Not true. In many cutures this is part of a communities tradition.

 

[WildGrits]

Being a teen in the 80's, I had lots of holes in my ears. Until they where in the cartilage, I didn't feel any pain.

My youngest daughter didn't even bat an eye when I had her's done at 3 months. So I don't understand what the big deal is thats being made here.

On a side note, My girls are now 9 and 11 and they both decided on thier own to stop wearing earings pretty much around first grade.

 

[MommaPooh]

I waited until DD asked for it. She was either 5 or 6. By the time she was 10 she decided to let them grow back. I did the same thing with my nieces. DN #1 was about 8 but due to severe allergies she let hers grow back within a year. DN #2 is more of a tomboy and she still does not want them done(she is 10). My parents waited until I asked for them as well. I had them done when I was 5 and in the 3rd grade a fellow student ripped an earring out of my ear, causing my earlobe to split.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

We pierced my dd's ears when she was 6 months old. I took her to the jeweler that my pediatrician reccomended because she is also a nurse. She would not even consider piercing her ears until 6 months because she wanted to make sure that she was given certain vax before the piercing. For us it is part of the way we are all raised. My sister, cousins and I have all had our ears pierced at about a month old. They used to do it in the doctor's office. I think it is a personal choice. This is what we feel is right for our family. Oh- and yes we circumsize as well.

 

[rt2dz]

OK, I haven't read beyond the first 3 posts and I don't have a daughter, but...

I'd wait until she asks, and then with a minimum age. My sisters make my neices wait until at least 3rd grade. My mother made all us girls wait until 12. She (Mom) wanted us to wait until we could care for them ourselves, and to make sure we actually wanted them pierced. I do have one sis who doesn't have pierced ears--never wanted them.

Personally, I hate it when I see babies with pierced ears. I don't know why. Not my kid and it doesn't affect me in any way and I know there isn't anything "wrong" with it. I guess it just seems to me, that it is a cosmetic thing, and all cosmetic things should be the choice of the individual.

Now off to read the thread!!

 

[rt2dz]

Will someone please explain why they circumsize their sons if not for religious reasons.

I know you have gotten some answers here, but I also wanted to add, that it has now been researched and proven that males are less likely to get and spread sexually transmitted dieases (including AIDS). And, yes, people DO have prematrial sex even if you teach them not to. And even if they don't, their partner might have. And even if their partner hasn't, there are still cracks in the system where people get AIDS from non-sexual ways (ie, blood). And yes, people may be HIV positive for awhile before they find out, especially if they think there isn't a way to have gotten HIV. Even condoms aren't 100%.

 

[pperfectmom]

I know you have gotten some answers here, but I also wanted to add, that it has now been researched and proven that males are less likely to get and spread sexually transmitted dieases (including AIDS). And, yes, people DO have prematrial sex even if you teach them not to. And even if they don't, their partner might have. And even if their partner hasn't, there are still cracks in the system where people get AIDS from non-sexual ways (ie, blood). And yes, people may be HIV positive for awhile before they find out, especially if they think there isn't a way to have gotten HIV. Even condoms aren't 100%.

This amount is so small that the American Academy of Pediatrics still does not recommend routine circumcision. Of course they won't go so far as to recommend NOT doing it either. Aren't you glad they're clear on the subject? I took their wishy washiness to mean that it is a personal choice to be made by your family. For us, doing something like that to our son just because everyone else does it was not worth the pain and possible complications.

 

[Mom2Rae]

Had dd's, now six, done when she was 11 months old. My mom was against it and so was DH. Went by myself...held her while she cried...then we left the mall very happy!

Met parents and DH that night at a restaurant...they LOVED them! I was so proud to do it by myself. DD has NEVER HAD AN INFECTION and she only wears 14k gold...NOTHING ELSE!

Come to find out...while I was at the mall with dd, dh went out and bought her her first pair of real diamond earrings...about .50 carat total. She's just now started to wear them.

 

[Along4theRide]

I wanted to wait until my daughter was old enough to make that decision for herself. My DH and I made the decision that if she wanted to do it she'd have to be at least 5yrs old and by age 4 she was begging me to have it done (mostly from the egging on by my sis-her aunt). So on her 5th birthday she went and had it done. She understood what she was doing and was very brave! She didn't cry at all, hardly a flinch. She kept them clean and when 6 weeks went by we went back for a check up and her free pair of earrings, she was very proud of herself for keeping up with the responsibilities that come with it! She's a very much a girly girl and loves to change her earrings and show them off.

On the other hand we know a little girl who had her ears pierced at a very young age (before a year old) and we watched her every Sunday in the nursery at church. There were many times she came in with crusty/bloody ears do to getting her earrings stuck on things or accidentally ripped out. We were all the time having to watch what she put up to her face/ears to make she wouldn't get it stuck on her earrings. Just think about all the consequences before you make that decision for your little one!

 

[rt2dz]

This amount is so small that the American Academy of Pediatrics still does not recommend routine circumcision. Of course they won't go so far as to recommend NOT doing it either. Aren't you glad they're clear on the subject? I took their wishy washiness to mean that it is a personal choice to be made by your family. For us, doing something like that to our son just because everyone else does it was not worth the pain and possible complications.

You are correct in and prior to 2006, but incorrect now. The research I was referring to is very new, this month, and it has such merit the AAP has made a statement that they are strongly considering changing their stance (and probably will in the next few months) to in fact recommend routine circumcision.

Personally, I totally agree that it is a personal decision. We had a hard time deciding. We did it b/c one of DHs friends said to do it (they didn't do his son & they regretted it for tons of reasons--mainly b/c it upsets the son) and my doctor assured me the way they numb them now, there is no pain--she's had minor surgery with the same anthestia (excuse my spelling). And, I have to say, my boys didn't seem bothered by it--more upset over the numbing medication process (they put the topical on with a little cap where it counted & they didn't like that).

 

[wtpntigger2]

My mom made me wait till I was 11 to get them done, and I hated having to wait that long.

I really don't know what this "pain" everyone seems to remember and are sparing their daughters from remembering. Yes it hurt, but just like childbirth, I no longer remember the actual pain.

Anyway, dh and I decided we would wait till dd4 wanted them pierced. We felt it wasn't our choice to make for her. Well she has been begging constantly for the last week and on and off the last year to get her ears pierced. She is aware that it will hurt for a moment, but then the earrings will be in. We'll most likely be going to get them done in the next week or so.

 

[zain2006]

my daughter was 2 months old when the pediatrician pierce her ears

 

[shmoogrrrl]

I planned to have my Daughter be around 5 and then only if she asked. When she was about to be three, her best friend had hers done and that was all she wanted. I took her for her birthday, after giving her the full story on the pain and everything. I gave her the opportunity to back out even after they had put the dots on her ear to place them. She wanted it and she DID cry when they did it, but was over it when she had the lollipop in one hand and a mirror in the other.

Now, she hates having them changed, so we turn them a lot, but don't change them very often at all. She is four now.

My Mom swore that I would be 16-18 before I would be allowed to do it, but a perm that was left in my hair too long (I wanted to be Annie) at the salon left me with horribly damaged hair, so it was cut VERY short. After a few weeks of "What a cute little boy!" at Church and elsewhere, and I got them at age 7.

Incidently, I think my parents almost got divorced over my ear peircing (okay, not really!). My Mom had decided to let me do it for my upcoming 7th birthday because of my hair, but hadn't told my Father. My Father, knowing that my Mom was against it, took me right before my birthday, behind her back figuring that it would be easier to explain afterward than before. Well, she was pretty upset because she felt that he took away a "Mother/Daughter" rite of passage. I guess that goes to show you that communication is important with parents. He thought that she wouldn't allow it, and she didn't bother to tell him that she was going to do it. It turned out alright though. My Mom went with me when I was 16 to have the second set done, although she wasn't thrilled about it.