You last see the Fab Five heading down 95 towards the World. Four of us, are having a laid back carefree trip, watching movies, having free access to the stocked cooler, chillin with the homies, downing fruit snacks and Yoo-hoos. The other one of us is trying to enjoy the last bit of bit of Pedros visual stimulation as we count down the miles to leave our state. Theres just something about passing that giant sombrero that makes me feel like Im officially on vacation! Now that the visual stimulation is over (again, no offense SC), my brain is more occupied with more pressing issues. I obsessively compute miles, time, average miles per hour, how many gallons til empty, waste removal time allotment (WRTA), etc. Leaving late made my whole schedule seriously askew! Honestly, my feng shui was all out of whack! As long as there is no rose smelling, we are fine. We make it through, SC, GA, and then Welcome to the Sunshine State! Why, thank you, after that complimentary cup of liquid sunshine, we do feel welcomed! As the relaxed four were enjoying the refreshments and using their WRTA wisely, I gathered, more liked hoarded any Disney/Orlando paraphernalia that I could get my hands on. I also, checked on the I4 traffic and was politely informed of the correct pronunciation of Kissimmee. Now, lets go people! Get a move on!! Somewhere between Jacksonville and Daytona, it becomes evident that we would miss our 3:00PM check in. I call up the old Bird, and no problem. I try to relax, but my official tour schedule is in ruins. You see, in my head, our day was supposed to go something like this:
3:00 check in
4:00 find those outlets
5:00 go to Wal-Mart, get 5-day base tickets, and get some groceries
7:00 check out DTD, get supper, and have a relaxed evening
10:00 lights out
Due to our late start, thank you very much P9, I had to mentally amend this plan. The only real important time was the 7:00 PM closing of the Wal-Mart travel center. However, I had to lower my OCDPD brain capacity allotment to focus more processing power on driving. For some reason, we missed the normal people exit for I4, but instead we found ourselves on the all idiots expressway. The signs said I4, but it was an evil trick. It was actually the gateway to the idiot superhighway, and every crazed lunatic, psycho drivers ed flunky in America had an invitation. This alterhighway had no rules, no speed limit, no lane lines, and obviously what we call a shoulder was really a passing lane. The road ragers were amuck and were really starting to tick me off. As some of us Southerners say, they were making me so ill (pronounced more like eel with two syllables and a southern draw: eeul). No, not sick, we use ill to mean angry. Say it with me: they were making me so ill!
Don't these people know that I have precious (and prissy and princess) cargo in here? I am just trying to get my family safely to their first ever visit to Disney. Are all of these people heading to the happiest place on earth?
Up next: Disney World closed, come back tomorrow!
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I just love all these O.A.R.'s.
Ill is not sick. And ugly is not bad looking. Example: You are acting ugly(not behaving)!
