Omg...my friend's dad hit on me

[dawn8226]

Wow! I do have to agree that this seems like a lot of things happening very fast so it almost seems made up, but I'll give you the benefit of the doubt. I am sorry you are going through this. This is terrible, but you are handling it well. Hopefully things will get better soon. I don't think you will hear from him for a while (but you never know how stupid some people are). Sorry you lost a friend over this.

 

[mickeyboat]

What a messed up thing to say.

I am sorry you feel this way, but I think the OP knows what I am getting at. People have told gigantic lies on the DIS before, and people who have been through those incidents have learned to be a little suspicious when we hear things that seem unbelievable. See that I am not the only poster who has questions.

Please note that while I questioned the validity of her story, I told her that if it is true, then there are too many coincidences involved, especially that he turned up at the drug store in the middle of the day when he should have been at work. He has called her numerous times during the day when he should have been working. If someone was doing that to me, I would either think they are going off the deep end, and / or consider it stalking, and I would probably be notifying the police.

Take care Jersey.

Denae

 

[LuvOrlando]

I think you are handeling this situation with grace and intelligence.

Why is it that when a frumpy girl is nice she's just 'nice' but when a pretty girl is nice she's 'flirting'? I guess this particular blind spot in the male mind is what keeps strip clubs in business. Its awful that all pretty young girls need to learn these lessons in life. Still, you'd better learn them well so you will be able to stop advances with dagger eyes by the time you're 23. I'm hoping my DD will have the look down cold by 15, DS too. Sadly these kinds of men are everywhere so since the world won't change you'll have to be the one to change.

He's trying to subjugate you by offering money everywhere, even his internship is an offer to buy you a step up in the world. His behavior implies that he wants to buy you. This is disturbing on so many levels. I can only guess his wife does have a pricetag so you must baffle her 100%. His daughter is probably angry with him too for embarassing her but since you're not rich & thats how the family does things you're not going to win with her. I'm sure he or his wife would just cut her off for being disloyal. The next time you run into him tell him you don't have a pricetag and then walk away.

 

[OceanAnnie]

I'm glad your mom knows. I hope he & his family will back off soon. Any chance for a mini vacation for you? Sounds like you could use one!

 

[dreamcometrue]

what really gets to me, after reading this whole thing, is ALL of this happened within 24 hours (minus the actual dinner)?? All the calls from him, the internship offer, you thinking about telling someone, you actually telling your BF and your mom, your mom calling the wife, the meeting at the drugstore, the call from your friend...it just seems like SO much! And why was he at the drugstore in the middle of the day? And if he was, it must have been close to his work, why would you go to this particular one knowing there is a chance of running into him?

I am really, truly sorry if I am wrong, but things just don't add up for me...maybe I am just out of line for saying this!

 

[Chicago526]

You know, I don't blame the friend for believing her parents over the OP. Who would want to believe that their father is a perv and their mother is so totally in denial that'd she make up horible stories to cover for her sick-o husband?

Hopefully she'll learn who her parents really are. Poor thing! OP, try not to take it personaly, she's likely even more confused than you are.

 

[ilovepcot]

OP, ask yourself this: "WHAT WOULD NANCY GRACE DO?" There's your answer!

 

[Shugardrawers]

Have you talked this over with your aunt Marlene? She always has good advice.

 

[grlpwrd]

I am sorry you feel this way, but I think the OP knows what I am getting at. People have told gigantic lies on the DIS before, and people who have been through those incidents have learned to be a little suspicious when we hear things that seem unbelievable. See that I am not the only poster who has questions.

Please note that while I questioned the validity of her story, I told her that if it is true, then there are too many coincidences involved, especially that he turned up at the drug store in the middle of the day when he should have been at work. He has called her numerous times during the day when he should have been working. If someone was doing that to me, I would either think they are going off the deep end, and / or consider it stalking, and I would probably be notifying the police.

Take care Jersey.

Denae

Great point.

I do wonder why the barage of postings and a play-by-play within the past 24 hours like someone mentioned. How can all this happen so fast???? It really doesn't add up. Men who are like the guy being discussed usually take steps to build up to stalking and harassment. It usually doesn't happen within 1 day, especially like how the OP stated he is a family friend.

 

[JerseyBallerina]

He's the kind of guy who sees something he wants and then goes after it. My friend told me about the time her dad saw someone driving the new BMW and he drove straight to the dealership and bought it. I'm sure he thought he could use his charms on me and I would buy into it and when it didn't work...he didn't know what else to do except to keep pursuing it.

And I posted a "play by play" here because for the majority of my posts, no one else knew about what was going on and I needed to talk about it.

On a side note, he hasn't called me since we ran into each other so his wife must have said something to him.

 

[VEGA]

I don't know if this was mentioned, but have you considered saving his messages or recording him on a voice recorder?

I'm asking because I went thru something similar in my college years. It wasn't my bf's father, but the Dean of Students. This man was a married sleazy manho who slept with many many female students. Although he was quite handsome, I couldn't picture myself being touched by this guy

I won't go into all the specifics, but I will say that after his numerous advances and perverted sexual innuendos he threw my way whenever I had to deliver his mail(campus work study job) I couldn't take it anymore. I knew if I complained to the President it wouldn't do any good since the Dean is his nephew.

One morning I called in and told my boss I had an errand to run so not to expect me on time. I went to Radio Shack and bought a voice activated tape recorder. The guy told me where to place the recorder in order to get a good voice recording. After I returned to work and the Deans office being my first stop, I was sooo ready because I knew I was about to nail his *** to the wall. Sure enough he was as freaky and perverted as ever. He told me what he wanted to do me, where he wanted to do it at and the many acts he wanted to perform on me and how he dreamed of us on his desk. Knowing I had to keep my cool and not give myself away, I said what would you have me call you if we did these things? He said, you'd call me Mr Big -Blank- Ismeal Blank I kept saying,"Oh really, what would your wife say"! -He say's,"She knows I'm a freak so don't worry your pretty tight-blank- about it". So much more I could say, but this being the Dis I'll just say it was very pornographic.

I knew after that conversation he thought I would be another notch on his bedpost , but little did Mr Perverted Big Britches know he was about to get the shock of his life. After leaving his office I went straight to the media room and made several copies of the recording. Hearing his voice loud and clear I knew my misery was about to end. I sent 2 copies to my sister who's an attorney. I sent one copy to my cousin who work for Channel 7 news in Chicago and I sent a copy to my parents. To be on the safe side, I also had 1 copy made for his wife and the city's news station.

Well, I went to work the next day and having to drop his mail off first he went right into his perverted talk. Pulling out a copy of the tape I made, I said "I want you to listen to this song I recorded on the radio last night, I heard it and thought about you all night long

This is how it went from there.

While putting the tape in he's looking at me while licking his smiling lips

He pressed play-start walking towards me, Thinking we're about to get it on until....

He hear his voice. He stops...Staring at me while listening to every nasty thing he said to me yesterday being repeated on a tape....He's still standing in the same spot listening to every word that is about to damn his career. So I kindly sit down. He stomp over to the tape recorder-pull out the tape and destroys it. He starts to call me all sorts of names while threatening me since he thinks that's the only copy. I politely pull out another copy and slide it across his desk letting him know, if he doesn't stop I will nail his *** to the wall and file sexual harassment charges. Also, I showed him the next day delivery receipts to my sister's law firm and to Channel 7 addressed to a well known reporter.

I think he lost a good 10 pounds from sweating like a pig but after all was said and done, he apologized, and he never crossed the line with me again. Matter of fact he never made eye contact with me either which was cool with me.

Whatever you decide to do, I wish you luck.

 

[dis ms.]

Add me to the group of posters that is mystified that all this happened in 24 hours. I'm sorry, OP, but this sounds sketchy. If I'm wrong, and these incredible coincidences did occur, then you have my sympathies. The way this has escalated in one day makes me wonder what the heck will happen over the next 24 hours.

Kind of OT, but I'm confused about the perv's relationship with your parents. I'm not trying to Internet stalk you, but when I read your post about them being aquaintances, I had to go back and look at your previous posts. At first, you said they were "kind of close."

Unfortunately, him and his wife are kind of close with my parents which makes the whole situation even grosser. They come over to my house for dinner occassionally which makes me think I should tell my mom.

Then you said they were aquaintances.

He'll probably lose my parents as friends but they weren't really close...more like acquitances, no big loss.

Sounds as if they get together for dinner fairly often. In fact, you said Mr. and Mrs. Perv were supposed to have dinner with your folks tomorrow. Are they friends or not? Later you said your mom doesn't think much of the guy.

Yeah, she's not really a big fan of his because he's a little too touchy feely with her too. I didn't tell who was bothering me at first and she guessed it was him.

So, why does she invite him into her home? I certainly wouldn't be breaking bread with the creep.

 

[JerseyBallerina]

Wow. Good for you for sticking up for yourself and showing that guy he can't treat people like that. That must have taken a lot and you must have saved so many other girls from that perverted old man.

 

[VEGA]

Wow. Good for you for sticking up for yourself and showing that guy he can't treat people like that. That must have taken a lot and you must have saved so many other girls from that perverted old man.

I basically saved myself. Believe it or not, a lot of the girls felt that sleeping with him would get them far. What that far was I don't know, but what was even sadder was that it wasn't a shock to anyone since he wasn't the only faculty member sleeping with students. Female Faculty members did the same thing and this being the case, you really had to stand on your own and stand firm since you really didn't know who to trust and who not to trust.

 

[JerseyBallerina]

Their relationship was more a casual one. My dad and him worked together on something and since their daughters were friends, my mom and his wife were friendly with each other. They know each other well enough to get together for dinner every once and a while but not well enough to call each other friends. It's not uncommon where I'm from to have people other for dinner that you're not best friends with, just familiar.

And people have problems with other people but continue a acquitanceship just because it's easier than dealing with it. He's over my house for dinner maybe once every three months and my mom can deal with him for those three hours.

 

[CheshireVal]

I do wonder why the barage of postings and a play-by-play within the past 24 hours like someone mentioned. How can all this happen so fast???? It really doesn't add up.

No, it doesn't.

 

[poohandwendy]

No, it doesn't.

Yup.

 

[Charles Darwin]

this story doesn't ring true. sounds like she's enjoying the attention, though.

 

[JerseyBallerina]

You all can believe what you want but I don't know why you think I would go through all this trouble to make this story up. I initially came on here to vent because I had no one else to tell and I kept everyone updated when things happened. If you choose not to believe me, go for it but I'm not explaining myself again.

 

[Sherri]

this story doesn't ring true. sounds like she's enjoying the attention, though.

seems a bit odd, everything that transpired over a short amount of time.