Okay...I've called the Late Night DISers, now I'm calling the SINGLE DISers!

[DocRafiki]

I HATE YOU ALL!

And, yes, firefighter, I was thinking that myself. But I didn't want to get into a "i'm fat" "no you're not!" "yes i am!" conversation that we all enjoyed oh so much in high school.


Well, I wasted some time last night and answered the eharmony questions again. I was thinking I'd get that message again, and I could post it for you guys. Well... I got 4 matches! (That's from ALL around the world, and yet they're all in the US, TWO here in Central FL!)

I have not figured out how that thing works, so I'm not at any stage with anybody. I will have to start learning from FM's posts about the subject. The one guy in Orlando actually "sounds" appealing.

I have to say that answering those questions was very annoying! I felt like they were trying to trick me into contradicting myself! (which I now believe is the reason why they couldn't help me before... I didn't fit into any of their profiles or whatever.) Those types of questions are hard for me, except for the ones that ask if I'm very decisive.. I'm not!

ekm -- i've never been to CA or NV, so I can't comment. I'm sure CA weather is nice, but it's just too far from anyone that I know! I don't think I would fit in with the culture over there, either, so I don't think I'll be moving out west any time soon.

 

[firefighter326]

Doc, I'm sorry if I said anything to make you mad. I really didnot mean it that way. Sorry

 

[DocRafiki]

No worries. No offense taken.

 

[firefighter326]

OKAY,
now why are nether of us sleeping????????? we are in the same time zone. Its alot colder up here. I'm at work getting very board but thats good thing. and you ?????

 

[DocRafiki]

Well I got home from work around 9:00. I always stay up late, even if I have to work early the next day. I need my wind-down time. But, I'm off today and am having a hard time winding up!

 

[pirateeast]

well take a day and just relax

 

[Pin Wizard]

Wow! I can't believe the number of DISers that have met the love of their life and are "blissfully happy" together. I feel like I'm really missing something here!! I stopped reading that thread yesterday. LOL! Now I just check the poll but will soon stop.

 

[DocRafiki]

I'm not reading that thread. It sounds like you need to stop comparing yourself to others. After all, their version of "love of a lifetime" is probably different from yours. How many people have you known who swore up and down that they found their "one" who later met someone else and retracted, saying "well I THOUGHT that was love, but now I KNOW this is." It happens all the time. And then there are people who are married for their entire lives without having the kind of relationship that would qualify as "love" in my book. Take my grandparents, for example, and a good number of people in their generation. They married whoever they happened to be dating when they finished school, and they stayed married regardless of what their relationship turned out to be.

Anyway, I do know that I see a lot of married people in the types of relationships that I would want absolutely nothing to do with (not that I don't care for the man personally, but due to the lack of romance, respect, etc.). They may stay married forever, but that doesn't mean that they have anything to be jealous of.

Does any of that make any sense whatsoever? I am babbling.

 

[ekmdisney]

Originally posted by DocRafiki

ekm -- i've never been to CA or NV, so I can't comment. I'm sure CA weather is nice, but it's just too far from anyone that I know! I don't think I would fit in with the culture over there, either, so I don't think I'll be moving out west any time soon.

I don't really fit in either. But its fun just to people watch. I know that there have been many time, especialy in LV that I think to my self, "What were they think when they picked that out!" Or, "Man, I bet they look good today." But in 2000 I went to DL, and I must have hit it on Goth Day. Every where you looked thier was a group of teens all dresses in black, with differnt colored hair. It was fun just to watch the other people try to take it all in.

Going back to CA in Aug. Going to DL, then drive up the cost to Lighthouse hunt, and then off to Yosemite for a day or two. So I think I will be around more people in my own element. But you know that you will always find someone who just loves to stick out in a crowd.

 

[DocRafiki]

OK, I broke down and read it. There are some really amazing stories there.

There are also a few "thought I did" stories.

Also note that right now there are 37 replies and 873 views. Hmmm... not very many people had anything to say on the topic.

You're not the only one.


Out of curiosity, if you don't mind... do you feel like your husband was the love of your life?

I personally think it's healthier to realize that there is not just the "one" out there for you. I believe there are a large number of men out there that you could form a fabulous, lasting relationship. It's just a question of being at the right place at the right time.

 

[Pin Wizard]

What you said in your post further up, Jen, makes sense. I'm sure there are many who think they're married to the right one until the divorce comes along. I read a couple stories on the first page, and that was enough for me! Haven't read the others. I did read of one guy who's been married 14 years and his wife informed him he's not the one since someone asked me to read it.

Do I feel like my husband was the love of my life? No. I never did. He was more like a friend that I married. And I won't be doing that again!!!! And it was only recently that I admitted to myself...maybe we shouldn't have gotten married. There were plenty of red flags that I chose to ignore. Even on my wedding day!

 

[legs22]

"I love doing it on my own - every morning I wake up and thank Christ I haven't got some middle-aged, menopausal man to bother me - I'm free, I'm single and it's great!"

That was from the show Mamma Mia. Sometimes that's how I feel. It's great being single and doing whatever I want. Well, within reason since I am a single parent. Other times I think it would be great to have someone by my side to share life's ups and downs with. I don't want to end up alone but I will not settle!!! Better to be alone than in a bad relationship.

Wow! I can't believe the number of DISers that have met the love of their life and are "blissfully happy" together. I feel like I'm really missing something here!!

I too was shocked by the large numbers that are so happy.

 

[Pin Wizard]

Yup, the freedom is nice, but I miss the sharing. No such thing as having both???

 

[DocRafiki]

Sure you can have both! You can be married to the love of your life but live in different houses!

That one comment by that guy made me pretty sad, too, PW.

 

[TigerBear]

Who I really felt for is the woman who is totally in love with the guy who is from a different nationality - and he has told her that he will end up getting married to someone from his own culture (because of his parents/values). That to me is sad.

PW, I know all too well the red flags that are so easy to ignore. The last time I watched my wedding video it reminded me how extremely nervous I was the day of my wedding. Like EXTREMELY nervous - not a good sign. I also remember that the first time he brought up marriage, my automatic thought was "this man is crazy". Why oh why didn't I listen to myself? I guess I can blame it on being inexperienced and 19. You live and learn. Yep, I definitely learned.

 

[floridaminnie]

You live and learn. Yep, I definitely learned.

You can say that again. When I see the red flags now, I run in the other direction. I have lived and I have learned!

 

[Pin Wizard]

I just heard from Disney845. She wanted to pass on a message to everyone...

"I am doing well for the most part, and doing exceptionally well with 'work guy'."

She's busy, busy, busy!

 

[floridaminnie]

Wish I was busy busy busy! But I'm happy for her. Thanks for passing the info on PW!

 

[Pin Wizard]

Originally posted by DocRafiki
Sure you can have both! You can be married to the love of your life but live in different houses!

ROFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

 

[Pin Wizard]

Originally posted by TigerBear
PW, I know all too well the red flags that are so easy to ignore. The last time I watched my wedding video it reminded me how extremely nervous I was the day of my wedding. Like EXTREMELY nervous - not a good sign. I also remember that the first time he brought up marriage, my automatic thought was "this man is crazy". Why oh why didn't I listen to myself? I guess I can blame it on being inexperienced and 19. You live and learn. Yep, I definitely learned.

Oh, there were red flags through the entire relationship I ignored. And the interesting thing was I had met him 2 years beforehand and didn't have the slightest interest in him. Should have listened! But on my wedding day...when my dad and I were still at home beforehand he was saying it would seem strange without me there. I told him that at first it would seem like I was on vacation. What went through my mind was...tell me to stay home and I will! RED FLAG! The other was in the church lining up for the procession. My 2 year old nephew started screaming at the top of his lungs. My sister's husband looked at her like she needed to take him outside. Well, I was next to my Dad and told him she's my sister and is not to leave the church...have her husband take him out! Ooooooooooooooooo...I was nasty about it! I thought...hmmm...I haven't had "cold feet" all along until now?! RED FLAG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And I had many others, believe me! Not to mention them continuing on in our marriage. I guess our beautiful child is really supposed to be here!! I'm like a completely different person with darling heart throb. Nothing like the way I was at times before.