North vs. South - is there still a "conflict" there?

[hereyago]

I live in SE VA. And I was born in Tennessee. However, I spent a few years abroad in my youth as my DF was in the military.

My DM was born and raised here, DF was born and raised in Indiana. They would occassionally have the north and south arguement.

I welcome anyone from anyplace. I actually adore people from Mass. Their accents are my favorite.

But there are ignorant people everywhere. Just like when people from other places "assume"that people who drive in the South are terrible drivers.

Um, I live in a heavy military and there are people who were stationed here from other states who have decided to stay here. So not everyone who is here was born and raised here.

 

[MrsPete]

The one that that always stood out for me while living there, and it's evident in this thread, is that Atlanta is entirely it's OWN place.

That's true. In the same way that Florida is located geographically in the South, yet does not really share the cultural mores and customs that exist here in the South, Atlanta is located here but isn't really "a part of" the South. That is, it's not "Southern" in the same way that Charlotte, Myrtle Beach, and Columbia are "Southern".

Including...the fact that eeny meeny miny mo was NOT about a "tiger" at all. Whole different word there. She nearly fell off her chair when I started to do the "tiger by the toe" rhyme to choose which clinician I was going to call down for a walk-in patient...she'd never even heard it with "tiger".

I know exactly what you mean, but that's something that I heard frequently in my childhood . . . yet today I don't hear any longer -- or, at least, something I hear very infrequently.

I think that probably if you are a redneck, you're allowed to use it. If you're not, it's best to stay away from using that word lest it come out wrong.

The term "redneck" originated from the NC Scotsmen -- largely mountain dwellers -- who fought during the Revolutionary war. Considered somewhat "backwoods and uncouth" even according to the standards of the day, they wore red neckerchiefs to identify themselves. Today people tend to think it's a term referring to farmers, etc. whose necks are sunburnt, but that's not really the original meaning.

At the time I was in Spartanburg, there were no Southern Baptists I knew who understood Catholicism. And remember, I went to a church for awhile and heard them talk! They all, to a one, believed firmly that Catholics worship saints, and that was their problem with it.

You're painting with a wide brush. I, for one, am a Southern Baptist, and I understand the tennants of the Catholic church and understand the difference between praying to a saint for intervention and worshiping them. I learned that in the Southern Baptist church -- I don't believe in praying to the saints, but I understand where Catholics are coming from.

Random comments because I'm tired of copying phrases:

"Bless your heart" isn't nearly so common as it used to be. I go weeks without hearing it.

Baptist churches vary widely because they're independent. Southern Baptists are somewhat more connected than other branches (i.e. Primative Baptists), but still the Baptist churches are less unified than other denominations. Other little differences include the fact that each Baptist church hires its own preacher (as opposed to the Methodists, whose clergy are hired by the denomination and are moved around every 2-3 years). Anyway, as a result, you'll find some very conservative Baptist churches, some very liberal Baptist churches, etc. Just because you like one, doesn't mean you'll like the one across town. And you'll find great disagreements on many topics among Baptists.

And a new one: If you're going to move to the South, you must accept that BBQ is pulled pork. You cannot say, "I'm having a BBQ" and then serve hamburgers/hotdogs. That's a cookout!

 

[Jennasis]

Oh, I will I am glad that you think Clemmons is nice

Do you drive to WDW? We only fly now from PA, but are excited about the chance of driving. How long does it take you? Is it a bad drive?

We always drive to WDW now. Takes 9 hours door to door. From Clemmons, tack on an extra 1/2 hour.

 

[asta]

He may be teased for liking the Vikings, but if he was a native Tennessean, he may get teased for liking Vanderbilt. (yes, I am aware that one of those is a college team and one isn't, you get the point)

OK Bitsmommy, you have me confused. Which one of those isn't a college team? There is the University of Tennessee which definitely has a football team despite how they were treated by that skunk of a human being masquerading as a football coach (otherwise known as Lane Kiffin). And then there is Vanderbilt. I am a Vandy alum so I think that I can say that during many seasons it may be hard to believe that they are actually playing football.

 

[Planogirl]

We do have some racist people in some of the small towns and that comes from both sides. I have family in some rural parts of the state and it always surprises me to see Confederate flags in the areas. None of the residents seem to blink an eye.

Houston, as someone pointed out already, is very progressive and Austin is a liberal "free-thinking" island. The rest of the state can be bit backwards in some ways but it is improving.

 

[Luv2Scrap]

We always drive to WDW now. Takes 9 hours door to door. From Clemmons, tack on an extra 1/2 hour.

See, that's what I would love - to be able to drive to Disney!

 

[okeydokey]

And a new one: If you're going to move to the South, you must accept that BBQ is pulled pork. You cannot say, "I'm having a BBQ" and then serve hamburgers/hotdogs. That's a cookout!

Now that's the truth!

 

[1957]

I am not a Southerner, although I do live in the South now. Within one week of living here, the first thing I learned was not to discuss religion or politics. Still don't, at least not with the locals! I'm from a Western state (not CA) where we had a variety of ethnic populations, religions, and political views, so I'm used to open-mindedness. I avoid restaurants and stores that continually have Fox News blaring, and pretend to be talking on my cell phone when heated religious and political discussions are taking place. I just smile and go about my business. I belong to a four hundred year-old well-established Protestant religion that no one here has ever heard of (I've been called a non-Christian more than once), and my Church is non-existent here. So, I don't discuss politics or religion down here. Learned my lesson within one week!

 

[mhsjax]

No matter where you move, you will encounter people that have preconceived notions and negative opinions about different areas in the country. You don't have to go so far as moving to the North or moving to the South to find it.

I moved from MA to the Tampa area for several years in the 90's and yes I did receive some grief about my Yankee accent. There are still people fighting the "War of Northern Aggression" (didn't hear that term until I moved to FL. Also had no real concept of anti-Catholic attitudes until I moved there either). While it was disconcerting to me, it was quickly realized that attitude was the mark of the individual and not the area.
True if you moved to a small town, you will probably get grief. But you know what? many small towners generally don't like outsiders and will find some reason to separate the newcomers from the established population: be it their accent, ethnicity, religion, or choice of vehicles.

I live in Florida and we have two huge Catholic churches within 10 miles of each other. I think that other than the people I know in my church, most of the people I know are catholic. I could see an anti catholic thing because of all of the Southern Baptists, (of which I am one) but I find it really offensive that someone would give you a hard time because of being Catholic. That is tacky and rude.

 

[dansamy]

Pick the right religion, politicians and football teams and you'll be fine. Oh, and buy into a good hunting club. Tell your DH and DS they're gonna have to learn to hunt, at least a little. That's basically the male social club in the South. My old pediatrician takes off Mondays and Fridays during hunting season. No kidding.

 

[MrsPete]

We do have some racist people in some of the small towns and that comes from both sides. I have family in some rural parts of the state and it always surprises me to see Confederate flags in the areas. None of the residents seem to blink an eye.

I don't have Confederate flags, nor does anyone in my family . . . but you often see the slogan "Heritage, not Hate" posted with those flags. Lots of people here enjoy old Southern architecture, cooking, and history. In the fall you can find lots of Civil War reinactments -- doesn't mean anything deeper than a celebration of days gone by. Don't assume that a flag equals racism.

Tell your DH and DS they're gonna have to learn to hunt, at least a little. That's basically the male social club in the South. My old pediatrician takes off Mondays and Fridays during hunting season. No kidding.

I grew up in a rural, rural area, and fewer than half the men I knew then hunted. Now, as an adult in a medium-sized town, I know even fewer. Those who do are DEVOTED to the hobby, but I'd estimate that 10% of the men I know are avid hunters, and another 10% tag along with them once or twice a season but aren't really all that "into it" themselves. I know more fishermen (though ALL hunters tend to be fishermen as well).

 

[Sanchez]

I am not a Southerner, although I do live in the South now. Within one week of living here, the first thing I learned was not to discuss religion or politics. Still don't, at least not with the locals! I'm from a Western state (not CA) where we had a variety of ethnic populations, religions, and political views, so I'm used to open-mindedness. I avoid restaurants and stores that continually have Fox News blaring, and pretend to be talking on my cell phone when heated religious and political discussions are taking place. I just smile and go about my business. I belong to a four hundred year-old well-established Protestant religion that no one here has ever heard of (I've been called a non-Christian more than once), and my Church is non-existent here. So, I don't discuss politics or religion down here. Learned my lesson within one week!

It must be so difficult for you to have to put up with the ignorant "locals." If only the Southerners you are surrounded by had the intelligence and tolerance to understand the depths of you. Best to just smile and go about your business while the Fox News blaring masses live an unfulfilled life.

 

[mvazul]

As a previous poster mentioned, Southern Baptists are a Protestant denomination. And I'm so sorry to hear that! I'm a Christian, and I attend a Southern Baptist church. We absolutely don't harbor ill will against Catholics. We all worship the Trinity after all! I realize there are some Southern Baptists that give us all a bad name (as I suppose is true with any religious denomination), but I hope you won't think we're all like that.

Oh my goodness. Absolutely not!! I never think any area has the exact same type of people. I have lived enough places to know that's not true. The Southern Baptists we dealt with were, well.....almost kind of like a cult. It was very odd. My ex-husband was in one of their churches. My son was exposed to it.

My son came home from his father's one weekend at the time the movie, The Passion of the Christ came out. A commercial came on for it and my son said to me, "Well, that will finally teach those damn Catholics!!" I'm sorry - WHAT???? He told us that is what his father's church was teaching him - that we didn't believe in God/Jesus and only prayed to Mary and the saints. He said the movie was coming out to teach Catholics they were going to hell, because we aren't Christian.

Well, I explained to him the director/writer of the movie is Catholic and the main actor is Catholic. That is certainly not the message they were trying to portray. I then had to explain to him that he, himself, is Catholic and should know this since he had been attending a Catholic church his entire life - his father even joined when we were married!

But, his dad and his "church" were very convincing to my son. It took alot of time and talks to make him understand. My ex even took me to court for full custody, because I was "not Christian". He told the judge I was Catholic and not a Christian. Therefore, he felt our son would be better off living with him. The judge's face looked like this: The judge had to explain to him that Catholics ARE Christian. The ex still brings it up every time we're in court. By the way - my husband's brother-in-law is Jewish. That little tidbit just about made the ex's head explode!!

I was brought up to tolerate and have an open mind about every religion. That is how I raise my kids. So, long story short, no, I don't believe every Southern Baptist is like that.

Michelle

 

[1957]

It must be so difficult for you to have to put up with the ignorant "locals." If only the Southerners you are surrounded by had the intelligence and tolerance to understand the depths of you. Best to just smile and go about your business while the Fox News blaring masses live an unfulfilled life.

I believe I already stated that that's exactly what I do.

 

[DarthKTrava]

I can answer this with first-hand knowledge. Unfortunately. I have to agree that you will not be doing your son any favors. We lived in Mayodan, NC (about 45 minutes north of Greensboro). I loved the area. I loved the area and our land/house, but once the people realized we were staying, attitudes changed big time. My husband coached my son's little league team. The only people I was friends with - who wanted to be friends with me - were from New Jersey, Illinois, etc. Once the "native" (for lack of a better word) parents found out we were Catholic and I let my son read Harry Potter, all hell broke loose. I suddenly became a Damn Yankee.

I hear more times than I care to remember, "Damn Yankee! Go home!" I was also told I was going to hell for being Catholic. People from the local churches started showing up on our doorstep trying to "school" us in the right way to be a Christian. One group of people even had the nerve to stand right in front of my husband as he was on the lawn tractor, trying to mow our grass. They started spouting Bible verses at him and tried to debate the Bible. What they didn't know is my husband went to Catholic school from first through twelfth grade. He sent one lady in the group home, crying!! She couldn't keep up with him. "Christian" became a four letter word to us. Religion is sooooo much different there than in the North.

The kids at the school were horrible. My son came home with a black eye twice in the 6th grade. The report we got from the teacher was that he was walking in the hall to go to lunch. The kids that gave him the black eye jumped him and started calling him Damn Yankee. The teachers did nothing but give the kids a written warning and called their parents. These same kids rode the school bus with my son. They then told him they were going to kill him and our entire family. They went into detail about how they were going to do it and the layout of our property. (What we didn't know is we bought property that had belonged to a family for many, many years. The person we bought from couldn't pay the taxes and sold it. So, we lived right in the middle of this family.) The cops were called, restraining orders were issued. The school told us and our son we needed thicker skins and to get over it. It was miserable. We moved two months later to Chicago.

Another reason we moved was the fact the KKK was burning crosses in a front yard just half a mile from our house. I have many more stories, but I'll leave it at that.

We also lived in Roanoke, VA for awhile. Completely different experience. LOVED it there.

Good luck!

Michelle

Edited to add - In all fairness, I'm sure we were the exception. We were in a VERY rural area of NC. I have cousins from NY state that live in Cary, NC and love it there. And, again, I would move back to Roanoke, VA in a heartbeat.

What a bunch of butt-hole kids. I didn't have friends in school as I was that "damn indian". I found friends later in the science-fiction fandom community instead. There is all that sort of crap in this area which is rather sad and very insulting.

I have a Yankee boss and once in a while tease him about his hatred of grits... but it's only good-natured ribbing. I could care less anyways. I may live here (near where you used to live) but I sure wasn't born here!

Also had a boss who I teased as being a "redneck" for being from the lower part of the same county I live in. Also good-natured ribbing.

 

[mvazul]

Don't worry, hentob - the Triad area is nothing like the most rural part of Mayodan, NC - they are miles apart literally and figuratively. Sounds like mvazul fell into a thicket of dumb rednecks - and we do have some of them in NC - but that's not the way people are usually treated in NC and especially not in the Triad or the Triangle.

I agree - we did land right in the middle of a family war. I loved the Triad. Really loved Winston Salem area. The area is beautiful and the weather was wonderful. I literally cried when we moved. I loved our land. I LOVED our house - we built it. I did not like the people that were around us. I wish we could have picked it all up and moved to the Greensboro area. However, the difference in house prices was between $200,000 and $300,000 more from Mayodan to Greensboro. Looking back on it now, we would have definitely picked a different area to live. Like I said, my cousin and his family love living in Cary.

 

[Sanchez]

I believe I already stated that that's exactly what I do.

I admire your "open-mindedness."

 

[1957]

I admire your "open-mindedness."

Thank you. It's why I remain polite down here.

 

[mvazul]

What a bunch of butt-hole kids. I didn't have friends in school as I was that "damn indian". I found friends later in the science-fiction fandom community instead. There is all that sort of crap in this area which is rather sad and very insulting.

I have a Yankee boss and once in a while tease him about his hatred of grits... but it's only good-natured ribbing. I could care less anyways. I may live here (near where you used to live) but I sure wasn't born here!

Also had a boss who I teased as being a "redneck" for being from the lower part of the same county I live in. Also good-natured ribbing.

I am so sorry. I honestly don't understand why some people have to be so cruel. I can take and give joking with the best of them. I can't stand the people who are just downright mean.

 

[ChrisFL]

in Florida, you have to go north to get to "The South", you go to the actual south of Florida you end up in the Caribbean/Latin American although it's still in Florida