Noise level in a restaurant

[bcla]

So my family was at a restaurant where it wasn't exactly quiet, but we happened to be seated in close proximity to a group of college-aged students. That in and of itself would have been that bad, but there was this one guy seated about 3 feet away and facing me who had a habit of yelling in his conversation, and it was hurting my ears. So I moved to the empty seat away from him, but it was still too loud.

After a while of this I tried saying something about it. He didn't seem to understand what I was getting at, but one of his dining companions sort of made a motion lowering her hand and indicating that yeah he was kind of loud, even for a crowded place. He did sort of calm down, but still he was probably the loudest voice in the entire restaurant.

How do other people deal with something like this? I've had someone tell me that my applause at a sporting event was a bit loud (he compared it to a gunshot), and I adjusted the way I did it.

 

[PrincessShmoo]

So my family was at a restaurant where it wasn't exactly quiet, but we happened to be seated in close proximity to a group of college-aged students. That in and of itself would have been that bad, but there was this one guy seated about 3 feet away and facing me who had a habit of yelling in his conversation, and it was hurting my ears. So I moved to the empty seat away from him, but it was still too loud.

After a while of this I tried saying something about it. He didn't seem to understand what I was getting at, but one of his dining companions sort of made a motion lowering her hand and indicating that yeah he was kind of loud, even for a crowded place. He did sort of calm down, but still he was probably the loudest voice in the entire restaurant.

How do other people deal with something like this? I've had someone tell me that my applause at a sporting event was a bit loud (he compared it to a gunshot), and I adjusted the way I did it.

Me, personally, if someone at a neighboring table was bothering me so much that I found it unacceptable, I'd ask to move to another table. Or tell my waiter/host that I would be leaving and why. I wouldn't approach the person/people I found annoying. Too many wackos out there.

 

[bcla]

Me, personally, if someone at a neighboring table was bothering me so much that I found it unacceptable, I'd ask to move to another table. Or tell my waiter/host that I would be leaving and why. I wouldn't approach the person/people I found annoying. Too many wackos out there.

We'd actually waited for about 45 minutes for the table, and a lot of the wait was because they were busy and took a while to clear the tables. There was basically no other available seating because the place was so crowded. Another issue was that these two tables were joined when we were seated and then split for our two parties. When they were separated, it was only by a few inches because there was no more room to move the outside table.

I also wasn't in a good mood. On the way in I was crossing the street and a driver wouldn't stop when I was in the crosswalk (carrying a flashlight too, so there was no way I shouldn't have been seen). I didn't particularly want to be at this place, but it was my wife's choice even with the wait. I noted when this other group arrived, and it was a good 20 minutes after we did, yet they were seated seconds after we were and a waiter took their order first although the same waiter took our order before bringing the orders to the kitchen. On top of that, they got their food 5 minutes before we did. It just seemed like all these little insults were just piling up when I would have rather been somewhere else.

 

[xlxo]

Tricks I've done for my fav eateries....

• 5pm early or 8:30pm late dinner.
• look for facilities where there are no kids (eg bars, casinos)
• avoiding the popular restaurants
• ask for a private room? Some premium restaurants have private rooms (my cousin's kids are the noisy ones) where kids can run around caged around our table. Also works to keep out noisy tables. There may be a minimum spending requirement before they will give you the room.

 

[lauradis]

We'd actually waited for about 45 minutes for the table, and a lot of the wait was because they were busy and took a while to clear the tables. There was basically no other available seating because the place was so crowded. Another issue was that these two tables were joined when we were seated and then split for our two parties. When they were separated, it was only by a few inches because there was no more room to move the outside table.

I also wasn't in a good mood. On the way in I was crossing the street and a driver wouldn't stop when I was in the crosswalk (carrying a flashlight too, so there was no way I shouldn't have been seen). I didn't particularly want to be at this place, but it was my wife's choice even with the wait. I noted when this other group arrived, and it was a good 20 minutes after we did, yet they were seated seconds after we were and a waiter took their order first although the same waiter took our order before bringing the orders to the kitchen. On top of that, they got their food 5 minutes before we did. It just seemed like all these little insults were just piling up when I would have rather been somewhere else.

what a horrible dinning experience.

As a woman, I would have said something , if that close. like "Can you plz lower your voice a little, I have a horrible headache." smile.
as a guy I don't think that would have worked. sorry

Maybe you should just nicely tell your wife the next time she wants food from there you would rather do take out, light the candles at home, put soft music on and just pay attention to her.

Was the food at least good??

 

[PrincessShmoo]

We'd actually waited for about 45 minutes for the table, and a lot of the wait was because they were busy and took a while to clear the tables. There was basically no other available seating because the place was so crowded. Another issue was that these two tables were joined when we were seated and then split for our two parties. When they were separated, it was only by a few inches because there was no more room to move the outside table.

I also wasn't in a good mood. On the way in I was crossing the street and a driver wouldn't stop when I was in the crosswalk (carrying a flashlight too, so there was no way I shouldn't have been seen). I didn't particularly want to be at this place, but it was my wife's choice even with the wait. I noted when this other group arrived, and it was a good 20 minutes after we did, yet they were seated seconds after we were and a waiter took their order first although the same waiter took our order before bringing the orders to the kitchen. On top of that, they got their food 5 minutes before we did. It just seemed like all these little insults were just piling up when I would have rather been somewhere else.

Maybe they were trying to hurry them out of there?

 

[Tozzie]

So my family was at a restaurant where it wasn't exactly quiet, but we happened to be seated in close proximity to a group of college-aged students. That in and of itself would have been that bad, but there was this one guy seated about 3 feet away and facing me who had a habit of yelling in his conversation, and it was hurting my ears. So I moved to the empty seat away from him, but it was still too loud.

After a while of this I tried saying something about it. He didn't seem to understand what I was getting at, but one of his dining companions sort of made a motion lowering her hand and indicating that yeah he was kind of loud, even for a crowded place. He did sort of calm down, but still he was probably the loudest voice in the entire restaurant.

How do other people deal with something like this? I've had someone tell me that my applause at a sporting event was a bit loud (he compared it to a gunshot), and I adjusted the way I did it.

I have mever been in this situation so I don't know what I would do but I can offer two reason he may have been talking loudly

First and probably not the case is people who are hard of hearing tend to yell and not realize it and secondly if it was really crowded and he was with a large party he may have been having touble hearing the conversation and automatically raised his voice thinking the others coudln't hear him.

Then that may also be the way he talks in life, I have a friend who seems to yell when she speaks she just yells, it is just her way.

 

[minnie mum]

Some people who are hard of hearing will speak loudly, because they can't hear themselves well. Some people are just naturally loud. I don't think they intend to be irritating.

I would probably not speak directly to someone at another table. But I would have no problem asking a server, or even the manager, to ask them to dial it down.

 

[Ceila]

Loud talkers annoy me, and I probably would have said something but put the blame on the acoustics in the room.

However, I can't imagine I would get upset over their order being taken before mine when we were basically seated at the same time, nor could I manage to care if their food was served a few minutes before mine.

 

[low-key]

Some people who are hard of hearing will speak loudly, because they can't hear themselves well. Some people are just naturally loud. I don't think they intend to be irritating.

all my life my mom had real bad hearing, while she wasnt loud, I always had to talk loud so she could hear me. I sometimes have to think about not being loud

 

[bcla]

Like I said, college aged. The loud dude looked like he was 20. He also wasn't that loud continuously, but maybe every third sentence he would just raise his voice like he was super excited. I wasn't paying attention to what he was saying, but the sound level just went off the charts and there was no place for us to go. It was annoying myself, my wife, and my kid. Also, when my kid got restless, I asked my wife to go outside with our kid because I was conscious of how annoying it could be to other patrons.

 

[sam_gordon]

Like I said, college aged. The loud dude looked like he was 20. He also wasn't that loud continuously, but maybe every third sentence he would just raise his voice like he was super excited. I wasn't paying attention to what he was saying, but the sound level just went off the charts and there was no place for us to go. It was annoying myself, my wife, and my kid. Also, when my kid got restless, I asked my wife to go outside with our kid because I was conscious of how annoying it could be to other patrons.

The difference is "loud talkers" don't notice they're talking loud. Take it from one who knows.

 

[maleficent32]

The only time I would say something to a loud talker is when they are talking in a place where it is supposed to be quiet.
I would never think to speak to someone out at restaurant, unless they were literally screaming in my ear. IMO, going out in public means dealing with what the public does.

 

[Kellykins1218]

Like I said, college aged. The loud dude looked like he was 20. .

What does his age have to do with it? People of all ages can have hearing problems.

 

[MIGrandma]

Loud talking doesn't really bother me in a restaurant, unless as a PP said it's right in your ear. I wouldn't say anything to the person and wouldn't ask to be moved.

We did have someone two booths away from us the other night playing music on their cell phone. Had never had that happen before. It was an older woman too, not a teen.

 

[mom2rtk]

It might annoy me but I can't even imagine saying something to them. It's not like you're going to become life long friends. It's just dinner.

 

[NewRVLady]

OP- I wouldn't stay that long !sounds like everything went wrong that night

We seldom go to popular restaurants at night( only on a weekday)....do lunches instead
But I would never say something to strangers about their behavior- too many crazies!

 

[Andtototoo]

A few years ago, we were in a restaurant for dinner in December. We were seated, after a wait (so no other tables were available to move to, not that it would have made any difference given how loud this person was), next to a set up for about 20 for a work holiday dinner. The problem arose with one of the ladies who had the loudest mouth I've ever heard in my life. Everyone around us was wincing whenever she talked, which unfortunately was a lot. She was one of the first ones there. Every time another coworker would come in, she would yell to the front of the restaurant, "Hey, we're over here!" I am not exaggerating when I say people outside could have heard her.

She was so loud, she was making my ears hurt. I had gotten to the point where I was going to ask for our food to go, when her boss came in. He walked right up to her, got in her face and said, "WHAT have I told you about using your inside voice? No one likes the way you yell. No one, including everyone in this restaurant. Stop it. You are not on the farm any more, stop acting like it. Lower your voice or stop talking entirely." She proceeded to argue with him that she had a right to talk like that and "that's just the way I am!" But eventually she did stop talking. I bet she's no longer employed there.

 

[Dancind]

Wow, Andtototoo, wouldn't you love to be able to do that with some people?

My husband thinks I am weird because I hate to be seated by loud people. Glad I am not alone.

We ate at a very nice place in Napa once, and had a party about five tables away that was shutting down the whole restaurant. Two drunk ladies and their dates or husbands, literally no one else was talking it was so bad. I was amazed that the restaurant manager wasn't doing anything about it.

About the time we finished our entrees, the ladies went outside to "swim" in the fountain in the front of the restaurant. Such a relief.

 

[FairestOfThemAll37]

A few years ago, we were in a restaurant for dinner in December. We were seated, after a wait (so no other tables were available to move to, not that it would have made any difference given how loud this person was), next to a set up for about 20 for a work holiday dinner. The problem arose with one of the ladies who had the loudest mouth I've ever heard in my life. Everyone around us was wincing whenever she talked, which unfortunately was a lot. She was one of the first ones there. Every time another coworker would come in, she would yell to the front of the restaurant, "Hey, we're over here!" I am not exaggerating when I say people outside could have heard her. She was so loud, she was making my ears hurt. I had gotten to the point where I was going to ask for our food to go, when her boss came in. He walked right up to her, got in her face and said, "WHAT have I told you about using your inside voice? No one likes the way you yell. No one, including everyone in this restaurant. Stop it. You are not on the farm any more, stop acting like it. Lower your voice or stop talking entirely." She proceeded to argue with him that she had a right to talk like that and "that's just the way I am!" But eventually she did stop talking. I bet she's no longer employed there.

That's an unfortunate situation in the restaurant. And the lady's voice by the sound of it was inappropriately loud.

But I have to say that in this situation the boss sounds even more inappropriate! If that's truly what he said it's completely demeaning and rude and all around inappropriate. Depending on the situation the boss could have very well lost his job for chastising her behavior like that in front of everybody especially if he got in her face.