Need "not-yet-ready for Kindergarten"advice...

[pirateofthecarolinas]

I did option #2 with my son and daughter.

It didn't help my son because we hadn't comfirmed his learning disability until after he had finished the year.

My daughter flourished in this type of environment. It was academic with lots of science and art. She learned how to read this year. Her birthday was one month before the cut off. She was more than prepared for K. I felt that she would be bored in regular K so we enrolled her in a Spanish Immersion Magnet School. There are 5 of her classmates from the PreK/K class at this school. They are all doing extremely well academically. They are 6-12 months older than the rest of the students. You can't underestimate the "gift of time."

I am hoping that my last son will start school with his peers. I have never regretted holding my 2 children back. I am so glad that I didn't have them repeat at the same PreK School. I think that the change in schools was good for them.

Good luck with your decision.

Lori

 

[Az Pirates]

My youngest DD was in a similar situation last year. Her B-day is 5 days before the cut-off.
She did a pre-K summer school program with one of the kindergarten teachers at our elementary school (also was DS's teacher in K) The teacher felt she would do fine in K - but I just was not comfortable with that. We decided to give her another year before starting K.
As a parent you know your child best. If it is a borderline situation, I would definitely lean toward giving her that extra year to really be ready.

Good Luck with you decision.

 

[jennyl772003]

Just wanted to share a little of my experiences. My son was a young kindergartner his first year and was too immature and did not learn like he should have. Now this year, in the same class, same teachers, very similar ciriculum, he is doing wonderfully. The reason? HE is different. Don't count out option 1!

 

[liznboys]

I also vote for Option #2. We have a simliar situation....

My oldest son was born 9/23/99. This year the cuttoff in Maryland is Oct 31st, so he could go to Kindergarten. His preschool teachers say he is completely ready too. But, we are keeping him in preschool for another year. I don't feel the need to put him in yet, even though he is ready. I'd like to give him another year to mature and grow in every sense of those words. I actually feel that he will have a "leg up" on his classmates throughout his school years since he'll be one of the oldest in his class!

When we were trying to decide what to do about this, it came down to this. If we hold him back and he ends up being bored and exceeding his classmates by far, then we can think about having him skip a grade. BUT, if we put him in and he ends up behind the other kids and struggling, then we might have to hold him back. The first situation sounds MUCH better.

He is going to a different preschool next year than he did this year. That way he won't have to repeat the same curriculum (not that it would be a big deal to repeat a preschool curriculum lol).

Good luck in your decision!

 

[Mr.BsMom]

I would definitely go with #2 (if available), with my second choice being #1. Our son has a summer birthday (cutoff for school is Aug 31 here.), and we felt he was ready for Kindergarten this past year. (He has excellent social skills and is very smart.) It turns out that he really does not have the maturity or the ability to sit still and stay on task like he needs to. His kindergarten teacher along with the school counselor have recommended that he go into the "developmental 1st" or "pre-1st" grade class next year. While I struggled with this idea for a while, I've come to realize that it is what is best for him and really that's what it's all about. It can only help him to give him a little more time to mature and grow. He'll end up being one of the oldest in his class instead of one of the youngest, which I think will definitely help his confidence.

Good luck with whatever you decide!

 

[Barb D]

Liz, check your PM! We don't live far from you, and I'm wondering what preschool(s) your kids have gone to. (I PMed so we won't be posting detailed info for all to see...)

 

[Disney Doll]

Another vote for option 2.

My boss had a similar scenario with her son last year. He started Kindergarten, and the teacher quickly relaized he was not quite ready. She recommended a similar program to what your option 2 sounds like. The Kindergarten teacher also gave my boss some wise advice. She said that their first yearor two of school colors their perception of school for the rest of their life, so why not try and make it a positive experience? She said that if my boss' son were struggling, falling behind, bcoming frustrated etc, then school would have a very negative connotation to him, which he would carry throughout his entire school career. My boss heeded the advice, and now her little guy is all set to go to Kindergarten.

Sometimes I think "the system" pushes kids to grow up too fast!

 

[dbogen]

I was in you situation a few years ago my DS b-day is 12/22 cut off is 12/31. His preschool teachers said he was ok for K so we sent him, we only have 1/2 day in our town. I felt he wouldn't get anything else out of preschool (besides 2 years of K is cheeper than 2 years of Preschool). A classmate of his opted for a preK in another school. At the end of K DS teacher said he knew all he needed to know but didn't have a good wrok ethic for 1st. So we kept him back. Now at the end of 5th grade DS and his old classmate from preschool are at the same level. Kids are resiliant and in a few years you may look back and wonder why you even worried about the whole situation. Best of luck in your decision.

Deanna

 

[jacksonsmom]

I am in the same situation as you.
My son will be 5 on Aug. 11th. The cut off here is Sept. 1st. So he could start Kindergarten this fall.
I have decided to wait another year, although he pass the kindergarten screening.
I think one more year to "grow up" maturity wise will benefit him in the long run!

He went to preschool this past year. Next fall he will be going into the same preschool but this year in their Pre-K program. It is just for kids that are either being held back or just missed the cut off date by 2 months. So by the beginning of December all the kids in that class with be 5 year olds.

They work with getting the kids ready for kindergarten. I think this is the best choice for my DS.

If you don't think she is 100% ready for Kindergarten don't send her, no matter what others say!
Sounds like you have some great options to decide on.

GOOD LUCK!

 

[HollyJoy]

YOU are the one who knows your child better than anyone else! I say go with your gut. My youngest daughter will turn 5 at the end of September. The cut off here is October 31, and both her preschool teachers, as well as myself, think she's totally ready for Kindergarten. Right now, she's one of the younger ones in her Preschool class, but heads above most of the class. I don't believe that repeating preschool FOR HER would be beneficial. However, if we had made the decision to hold her back a year, we certainly would have sent her to a different school so that she would get a different curriculum. Good luck in your decision!

 

[pkasbohm]

I also vote for #2 option! They mature so much in a year it is amazing!! Here in Neb. they are trying to pass a law that kids have to be 5 before aug. 1st to be able to go to kinder. Which in MHO that is a good idea because you have kids that were held back by their parents that are 6 and then there are some kids that aren't even 5 yet when they start school. That is very hard for a teacher to teach with that much of an age gap!!! Anyway, hope you decide--i am sure you will make the right choice!!

Pam

 

[m&m's mom]

I was in a similar situation. My oldest DD was born 4 months prematurely in July vs. Nov. That made her eligible to go to Kindergarten earlier than if she was full term.
We truly agonized over what to do. Bottom line is if you are not sure - WAIT! I have never spoken w/ anyone regretting holding their kids back.
The main factor that tipped the scales on us waiting was how many teachers strongly advised us waiting. There are a lot of teachers in my family and I heard many situations where they thought a child should have waited and no stories about kids waiting that should not have.
Good Luck, option 2 looks pretty good.

 

[julybride]

Follow your gut instinct which is telling you to delay starting her in Kindergarten.

If it were my choice I would probably go with option 2. A transitional Kindergarten sounds like a great alternative. The children in her class will probably be at the same place that she is - not quite a pre-schooler but not ready for the next step. The teachers will be devoted to preparing them for this next step and help them ease there way.

 

[mickeyfan1]

From a slightly different standpoint................ When my youngest sister turned 5, she made the date for 1st grade in VA, we had just moved there from Colorado. Had we not moved, she would have done to kindergarten. But there was no kindergarten in VA at that time, so off to first grade she had to go. My younger sister was also 5, turning 6 on October 3rd, so she went into first grade, also. She had been in kindergarten the year prior. My youngest sister is now 46. To this day she will tell you she wished she hadn't gone to first grade that soon, or at least have been held back to repeat, because she was so far behind, and the youngest, etc. She says that it affected her every year of school. Your child may not know right now what is best, but keeping him in either pre-school or getting him into a pre K or Transitional class will probably be the best thing to do in the long run. I would lean towards a little more of a learning atmosphere, rather than standard day care, but not so much as it makes him feel bad because he is not like the other kids.

 

[Barb D]

Holly, you, like, Liz, live near me. Could you please PM me with info about your DD's preschool? (I PMed you.)

 

[Epcotgal8]

I have been thinking about this as a teacher and a mother. I am only a substitute but actually that has allowed me to sub at one time or another for every kindergarten student in the school for the last 4 years. I also sub for older grades and when I go to sub in kindergarten it hits me that these kids are not much more than babies and we expect a LOT out of them. Some thrive, but some are downright miserable and it's not their fault, but they don't have the maturity level the almost 6 year olds have. My dd's (who is now almost 14) turned 5 only a month before the cutoff birthday date and only 2 weeks before school started. She had never been to daycare, or pre-school and I was a wreck but she thrived since it was new and a "big girl" thing to go to school (full days here btw). Both my sons who are now 8 and 10 had their birthdays after the cutoff date so they didn't start until they were almost 6 and boy was I glad! They just didn't have the maturity level my dd had at 5. So, each child is different. You know your daughter and you will make the right decision. Personally, I think the #2 transitional kindergarten is your best option. It's my guess that she has become SOO comfortable at her current preschool that she's accustomed to playing around and not having to work when she doesn't want to and that is a pattern that is set THERE. She's been there done that - it will be hard to make her take it seriously there now. If she goes to a transitional school it will be new and obviously from what you said she's smart - that's not the problem so maybe it will be interesting to her. Plus it gives her the experience of learning structure but yet no so much pressure as "regular" kindergarten. It's important that she likes kindergarten because it will set the tone of how she likes school in the future.
In my state our new governor wants MANDATORY pre-K for FOUR year olds! It is absurd. IMO OPTIONAL is one thing but not mandatory. It may help some who now won't have to pay for full time daycare for their 4 year old but how about moms like me that would not be happy sending their 4 year old off all day when I was a stay at home mom. Those years are precious memories to me. They grow up fast enough as it is. If I had to work I would have had to do preschool but at least that was my choice. I would have been ticked if they told me that I had to send them at 4. Plus, our schools here are overcrowded, underfunded, and we don't have enough teachers as it is! Hopefully it was just a fluffy campaign tactic and won't ever happen.