Need help!!! Offensive language in kids shows!

[Goofy'slady]

I find this discussion stimulating and I love reading everyones opinions, so I thought I'd post again. My girls are 10 and 3. My kids watch everything from Wow-Wow Wubsy to Hannah Montana and everything inbetween. I don't allow Fairly Odd Parents tho cuz they have the partents acting like over grown kids than parents and I don't want my girls thinking that they can get away with disrespecting adults like they do on the show.

We shouldn't let our guard down and rely only on what comes off of the family room TV to mold our kids. Nothing will take the place of good ol fashion parenting, not the TV, movies, music, friends or anything else. With that said I realize while we don't curse in our home I do say "What the?" a lot and my oldest knows exactly what I'm saying and now she says that or "what the heck". Do I flip out? NO, I actually think it's funny when she says it cuz her comedic timing is perfect. Kids will hear/say all sorts of things it's up to us to teach them what is appropriate and why. Let's all strive to be the best parents to our kids and leave being their friends to their friends.

T.

 

[livndisney]

Surely on PBS they say oh my god and sometimes maybe a little worse...

It doesn't sound like you watch a lot of PBS. My reply was to your comment about only having adult TV left after blocking the pay channels. As a parent, I allow my child to watch some shows on PBS. For the record, I personally don't remember hearing "Oh my God" on the shows my child watches. I am not saying it is not possible, I am saying I don't remember hearing it. In addition, my children are taught that phrase is not acceptable. If they choose to use it, there will be an issue. I do not "shelter" them. I choose not to set the example that something is ok just because it in on TV.

We don't watch Hanna Montana, my DD doesn't like her. Bratz dolls are not acceptable, but it has not been an issue as my DD doesn't like them.

 

[PrincessKsMom]

I don't want my kids thinking that all parents are bumbling idiots that can't be respected.

TV or no TV, I don't think there's a kid alive (at least by the age of 10) that doesn't think this anyway!

 

[lillygator]

I have to agree with the posters that say they use it as a learning/teaching opportunity. Seriously, when these kids go to school they are going to hear OMG and then some.

I have two DD's 5 and 3 they watch Disney, PBS, Nick, movies - they've seen all the Pirates (they think we are pirates), Narnia's, Harry Potter's, etc - they know what is not allowed to be said.

 

[kt_mom]

We let our DD5 watch the Disney shows. She loves HM and Suite Life and Cory in the House. For a long time I wouldn't let her watch Wizards of Waverly Place. And if I was out of the room and it came on, she would come and tell me so I could change the channel for her or turn it off.

She's also not allowed to watch Sponge Bob or have Bratz dolls. And she knows this.

Suite Life is a good example of a teaching tool. Those boys are often times doing somethign devious, same thing with WoWP. And usually they get in trouble. I LOVE when I hear DD say "that's what happens when you don't obey your mom" or "that's why you shouldn't lie to your parents". So she recognizes the innappropriate behavior for what it is.

I am having a problem with her saying "what the?" She never finishes it, but that doesnt make it okay. She'll say that she's not saying any bad words, and its hard to explain to her that even though technically what she is saying isn't bad but that it implies something not appropriate for her to say. This is a work in progress.

 

[_queenie_]

I also agree!! Overprotecting your children can be just as harmful. If you try to "hide" or ignore things you don't like, then how are your children going to learn how to handle situations they don't like when they are adults? They are learning from you that if you simply don't see it, it just goes away......not something succesful people often do. Yes, they are young, but it's better to teach them young then wait until they are older. No matter what you try to do, they are going to eventually hear those words.....and worse for that matter. If you teach them now that those words are not acceptable for your family (without making a huge deal of it), you most likely won't have a problem.
Trust me.....as a former teacher, I've seen the result of overprotective parents.........and it's not pretty.

I feel the same way.


I hate change the subject but I'll use drinking as an example. Kids are more likely to drink underage if they're parents were overprotective and never told them about anything about it, such as choosing not to do it and by saying what happens when you get drunk, versus the children of parents who have informed them about it. My kids have been at lounges (Kimono's is a perfect example), parties with our friends and relatives, etc, over the years where they've seen people get more than a little tipsy and they just end up laughing at them for drinking that much (the thirteen and seventeen-year-old at least). I really think that seeing people intoxicated and acting like, well, idiots, has definately kept my DS17 from being compelled to drink, he knows what alcohol does to people. Now, I'm not at all saying that everyone should take their kids to watch people get drunk, I'm just saying that if they do it's all about handling the situation properly. If you're eight-year-old asks what's happening to his uncle at your parent's Christmas party, it won't hurt him that much to know because then he won't be shocked in a few more years. You just have to explain what has happened, say it's a bad thing and move on. It's not easy, but you have to do it sometime. Not wanting your children to see that type of situation because it's inappropriate is a completely different than "hiding" it from them because it is reality. My DS's doctor even suggested that sometime he have a beer at home with lunch or something to help make that point of drinking being no big deal. To wrap up my ramble, it doesn't matter whether your children have been in a situation where there's heavy drinking (I'm not suggesting it, it's certainly not something I'm proud of), they just have to know that those situations exist and how you handle them.

 

[mom22princessesL&S]

Did I just read that a doctor was suggesting under-age illegal drinking?

 

[_queenie_]

Did I just read that a doctor was suggesting under-age illegal drinking?

Yes, believe it or not!

Last year he said that when he's 17 or 18 to just let him try half a bottle when all is quiet, it shocked me a little. He won't be having beer anytime soon, but I suppose it might not be the worst thing to do before college, maybe it would make kids realize that bud's pretty nasty (just an opinion )! He has mild asbergers though and will be living at home when he starts college in another year, so it's not a big concern of mine. He can wait, I don't think he'd have interest in it anyway. I don't want to turn this into a counter argument.

 

[lillygator]

we are sitting here watching Cars and I thought of this thread --- so far several references to smoking pot and the Rusteez guys just said freeze your b and n!

 

[prettyprincessbelle]

we are sitting here watching Cars and I thought of this thread --- so far several references to smoking pot and the Rusteez guys just said freeze your b and n!

No way!

I don't remember ANY of that in that movie..

 

[Brenna&Noah's Mom]

we are sitting here watching Cars and I thought of this thread --- so far several references to smoking pot and the Rusteez guys just said freeze your b and n!

Maybe I'm having a blonde moment but what is b and n?

 

[DevilDuckie]

Wait... your kid is three and you're letting him watch shows about teens and tweens unsupervised? I suspect that right there is the issue. If you are sensitive to what your kid watches, watch with him or choose more age appropriate shows.

 

[DevilDuckie]

"Oh my God" used to be taboo, but it's now mainstream and socially acceptable.

Several of the girls at my son's school this year say "Oh Emm Gee!" Which is sort of cute.

 

[MrsPete]

"Oh my God" used to be taboo, but it's now mainstream and socially acceptable.

Mainstream, yes. Socially acceptable, no. Did God quit listening to people taking his name in vain?

Kids are more likely to drink underage if they're parents were overprotective and never told them about anything about it, such as choosing not to do it and by saying what happens when you get drunk, versus the children of parents who have informed them about it.

This is one of those myths that's perpetuated so often that people think it's truth. Having grown up in a family of alcoholics, I've read extensively on the subject, and all the unbiased journal articles say the same things: The earlier the exposure to alcohol, the higher the risk of alcoholism. Parents teach kids about alcohol by setting a good example of moderation -- not through personal experience.

My DS's doctor even suggested that sometime he have a beer at home with lunch or something to help make that point of drinking being no big deal.

I would look for a new doctor.

 

[TheLittleRoo]

Wait... your kid is three and you're letting him watch shows about teens and tweens unsupervised? I suspect that right there is the issue. If you are sensitive to what your kid watches, watch with him or choose more age appropriate shows.

No, I'm not plopping him down in front of ICarly with a bowl of goldfish. When I am making dinner, DS13 is in charge of DD6 and DD3 for 30 minutes. It's a SHAME that something on a children's channel (Nick/ Disney) isn't squeaky clean for all ages.

Everyone may not agree on what is 'offensive', but when kids are the target market for the program, I just foolishly thought that the shows were appropriate for kids. Silly me. I shouldn't be surprised I suppose that this is the new norm as a reflection of society as a whole.

 

[asmit4]

I gotta ask- of those of you that had families/parents that do drink (not alcoholics but drink on a weekly basis- a drink with dinner/after work etc.)- did you all wait til 21 to drink in your parents house?

As young as 12, I was allowed to try a sip of fine wine (my dad is a collector). I was allowed to drink a wine cooler/1 glass of wine on weekends when I was 18 or so. In October of my freshman year of college, I came home to visit. My dad said "beers in the fridge, have whatever you want, just don't drive".

By 18, drinking was no big deal really. Not saying this is the way to go with raising kids but I don't know anyone that didn't drink with their parents by 19....maybe we are just backwards folk! LOL!

In fact, I thought my parents were STRICT, as my cousins (my dads brothers kids) were able to drink at 16! They'd also serve their friends too which is a HUGE legal issue! I'd never do that for fear of being arrested!

Maybe it's b/c my mom was raised in the era where 18 was the legal age so to her, 18 was no big deal.

 

[DevilDuckie]

No, I'm not plopping him down in front of ICarly with a bowl of goldfish. When I am making dinner, DS13 is in charge of DD6 and DD3 for 30 minutes. It's a SHAME that something on a children's channel (Nick/ Disney) isn't squeaky clean for all ages.

Everyone may not agree on what is 'offensive', but when kids are the target market for the program, I just foolishly thought that the shows were appropriate for kids. Silly me. I shouldn't be surprised I suppose that this is the new norm as a reflection of society as a whole.

What you choose for your 3 year old and what I choose for my 10 year old are very different. I find those shows utterly appropriate and the idea that Disney should not show them because you don't want your toddler to see them is absurd. It would be a SHAME if my kid was to lose good programming because you don't want it in your house. The Disney name is not a guarantee against any chance of offense ever by anybody. That's unrealistic, irresponsible and frankly, a little silly.

 

[prettyprincessbelle]

I gotta ask- of those of you that had families/parents that do drink (not alcoholics but drink on a weekly basis- a drink with dinner/after work etc.)- did you all wait til 21 to drink in your parents house?

As young as 12, I was allowed to try a sip of fine wine (my dad is a collector). I was allowed to drink a wine cooler/1 glass of wine on weekends when I was 18 or so. In October of my freshman year of college, I came home to visit. My dad said "beers in the fridge, have whatever you want, just don't drive".

By 18, drinking was no big deal really. Not saying this is the way to go with raising kids but I don't know anyone that didn't drink with their parents by 19....maybe we are just backwards folk! LOL!

In fact, I thought my parents were STRICT, as my cousins (my dads brothers kids) were able to drink at 16! They'd also serve their friends too which is a HUGE legal issue! I'd never do that for fear of being arrested!

Maybe it's b/c my mom was raised in the era where 18 was the legal age so to her, 18 was no big deal.

My parents were the same way, so were DBF's and they're like that with his younger brothers now (14 and 16). My parent's wouldn't let me drink at home until I was wasted or even buzzed, but they told me they would rather have me drink at home where I was supervised than our drinking underage at a party.

My parent's aren't big drinkers anyways, so it wasn't often. Usually when we we had a party or were at family/family friend parties.

Once I turned 21 the only part I was excited about was I'm able to order a drink at a restaurant.

I'm not saying this is the right way to "teach" yours kids not to drink, I don't have an addictive personality, but I'm sure with some kids letting them drink is a bad idea. Hope that makes sense.

 

[gaelic grace]

I have an almost seven year old little girl. Nick and Nick Jr have been basically obsolete in our house for years. I didn't like Sponge Bob, Rugrats and a host of other things. It was easier just not to have it on. She still tells me she is the only kid she knows that hasn't watched Sponge Bob. I can live with that! We do watch some Disney shows. I don't have a problem with HM or should I say haven't yet. We watch them with her for the first time and usually have some discussion over the main theme. There are other shows on Disney I don't let her watch like Life with Derek is one that comes to mind. We watch some of the movies but not all. Kids need something to look forward too and I just can't figure out what they watch at 12 if they are watching some of this at younger ages. My daughter knows if she uses what we call "TV talk" that there are consequences. She is much more apt to come home from school with stuff than she is to get it from the tv. Some of it has to do with the maturity and temperment of the child. My daughter is fairly compliant and doesn't normally need to be told more than once not to say or do something. However, I have friends whose children are really influenced by others and don't know when to quit. If that were my childs personality I would probably limit further.

 

[livndisney]

I have an almost seven year old little girl. Nick and Nick Jr have been basically obsolete in our house for years. I didn't like Sponge Bob, Rugrats and a host of other things. It was easier just not to have it on. She still tells me she is the only kid she knows that hasn't watched Sponge Bob. I can live with that! We do watch some Disney shows. I don't have a problem with HM or should I say haven't yet. We watch them with her for the first time and usually have some discussion over the main theme. There are other shows on Disney I don't let her watch like Life with Derek is one that comes to mind. We watch some of the movies but not all. Kids need something to look forward too and I just can't figure out what they watch at 12 if they are watching some of this at younger ages. My daughter knows if she uses what we call "TV talk" that there are consequences. She is much more apt to come home from school with stuff than she is to get it from the tv. Some of it has to do with the maturity and temperment of the child. My daughter is fairly compliant and doesn't normally need to be told more than once not to say or do something. However, I have friends whose children are really influenced by others and don't know when to quit. If that were my childs personality I would probably limit further.

You can tell your dd she is not the only one who has not watched Spongebob. My DD (just turned 7) doesn't watch it either. I don't care for Spongebob. I agree with you on "saving" the older age shows for later. I want my 7 year old to ACT like a 7 year old, not a 12 or 15 year old. She can act 12 and watch shows intended for 12 year olds when she is 12.