Need advice for teen opposed to Disney trip!

[wickersham]

My daughter and two of her friends since kindergarten days would like to take a trip together for their graduation in late May. My DD and one friend love WDW so we have planned an affordable trip the girls can help pay for from their weekend job money. The third friend has never been to WDW and has no interest in the trip. Being huge fans, we cannot understand her feelings. Any advice for trying to change her mind without being to in her face? It sounds like a dream grad trip to me!!

 

[erc]

Tell her Pretty Little Liars will be filming in the parks that week.

 

[jtowntoflorida]

Go someplace else all three can agree on. Going to Disney isn't everybody's idea of a dream vacation, and I'd venture to guess that most people who have to be convinced to go to Disney don't end up enjoying themselves.

 

[RustManFan]

what are the friend's interests? movies, sports, the outdoors, bowling, history, eating...?

maybe a water park would get them interested. or some boat rides.

also, where are you and how far afield are the girls going to travel?

 

[Gracie09]

you don't. You stay out of it and let them work it out

 

[RustManFan]

a spa visit?

 

[FelisLachesis]

Unfortunately, they get the mindset that they're "too old" for Disney, and it's very hard to shake that feeling. I had this issue with my last trip. It was my girlfriend and her 3 teenage children. Strangely enough, the oldest was the one who looked forward to the trip the most. The other two were rather "meh" about the trip.

What I had done was to try to get them involved in the planning, and tailor the pre-planning aspects to what they already like. One of them really likes Italian food, so I made a couple of Italian restaurant ADRs. The other one can subsist on McDonald's, so I kept a couple meal times open for a random QSR that the kids could pick.

The FP+ was a mix of what they wanted to do and what are the "must do's." Thankfully, the oldest's choices of rides were all "must do's," so those are easy. My Italian one wanted to stay on Terra Firma a bit more, so I picked a couple easy rides and also went on some of the slower rides. McD wanted more roller coasters, so in comes 7DMT, Expedition Everest, and so on.

The key is, get them involved in the planning. Even if they only give nothing more than vague answers, try to make them into something concrete. It'll make their trip better knowing that something that they want to do is on the horizon, and that they had some say in planning the trip.

 

[minnie mum]

Go someplace else all three can agree on. Going to Disney isn't everybody's idea of a dream vacation, and I'd venture to guess that most people who have to be convinced to go to Disney don't end up enjoying themselves.

ITA. And I also agree that if the other 2 girls are not relatives, you should stay out of it. Let them come up with their own plans. Trying to coerce someone into a trip that they don't want AND that they have to pay for is a recipe for disaster.

 

[RustManFan]

Yes, you can give some of the suggestions on the thread to your daughter and then let her talk to her friend about her interests and what she wants to do rather than WDW. Maybe her friend has an amazing idea!

Or maybe she is like my DD and DS that always respond "I don't know" when they are asked to help plan anything and leave it all to me. Then they have a fantastic time without the hassles.

 

[HappyDaisy]

Let the two who want the trip go. The third can stay home. It's all about choices. If she doesn't want to go, then she doesn't have to. She can make plans to do something else, either alone or with other friends.

 

[riverbend]

The key is, get them involved in the planning. Even if they only give nothing more than vague answers, try to make them into something concrete. It'll make their trip better knowing that something that they want to do is on the horizon, and that they had some say in planning the trip.

I understand this way of thinking but I have to disagree in this situation. I imagine that the LAST thing someone who isn't "into" Disney wants to do is talk about Disney. If it was a family trip that the OP was bringing the friend on, I might be singing a different tune but from what I understand, this is just a trip for the three girls. I agree with the PPs who said to just let them figure it out for themselves. I think the other girls' excitement and enthusiasm will rub off once they're there.

 

[mm1971]

My daughter and two of her friends since kindergarten days would like to take a trip together for their graduation in late May. My DD and one friend love WDW so we have planned an affordable trip the girls can help pay for from their weekend job money. The third friend has never been to WDW and has no interest in the trip. Being huge fans, we cannot understand her feelings. Any advice for trying to change her mind without being to in her face? It sounds like a dream grad trip to me!!

I am guessing she should jut realize it's not about the location. It's more about the company and spending time together. I know we vacation with friends and family in a lot of different locations. Each one has pro's and con's to each family/individual, but it has never been an issue as it's not about where we go.

If she doesn't want to go then go without or find somewhere that all 3 would enjoy.

 

[kmb584]

Go someplace else all three can agree on. Going to Disney isn't everybody's idea of a dream vacation, and I'd venture to guess that most people who have to be convinced to go to Disney don't end up enjoying themselves.

I couldn't agree more. My senior trip was to Jamaica. Sounds nice, right? I had a horrible time because I'm not a lay around on the beach all day type of person, and by the second full day I just wanted to go home. I went because it was where all of my friends wanted to go and barely spoke to any of them by the end of our trip because I felt pressured into going somewhere I had zero interest in. It wasn't their fault (I got out of my "funk" once we got home) and I could have said no thanks, but I didn't and went along because it was where everyone (but me) agreed on.

My best advice is to let the friends hash it out on their own. If the third friend isn't interested, don't pressure her into going.

 

[JennaDeeDooDah]

Personally, I'd ask my daughter if it was more important to her to go on a trip with one friend to WDW or with both friends somewhere else. If she really wants to go to WDW, she may not be any happier going somewhere else than her friend who has no desire to visit WDW would have actually at Disney. It's a fun idea for all three of them to take a trip, but at this point, if two of them are really excited about going to Disney World, a trip somewhere else might end up being a disappointment. Likewise, for the other girl who has no interest, if she gets dragged along, she likely won't enjoy herself because she will see it as she got dragged along to a place she didn't care to go. Time for them to decide what is more important to them. No right or wrong answer.

 

[disnut8]

My daughter and two of her friends since kindergarten days would like to take a trip together for their graduation in late May. My DD and one friend love WDW so we have planned an affordable trip the girls can help pay for from their weekend job money. The third friend has never been to WDW and has no interest in the trip. Being huge fans, we cannot understand her feelings. Any advice for trying to change her mind without being to in her face? It sounds like a dream grad trip to me!!

But if one of the friends doesn't want to go, how could the affordable trip have been planned without her involvement? It sounds like two of the friends are helping with planning with the third one not involved. The "we" doesn't sound like all three are included.

I love Disney World and would do anything to go on a trip. But not everyone is me. If the third friend doesn't want to go, then she doesn't go and the other two do. Or, the trip doesn't happen and all three go somewhere all three can agree on.

You are a proud parent and grats! But, this decision should not be yours.

 

[jtowntoflorida]

ITA. And I also agree that if the other 2 girls are not relatives, you should stay out of it. Let them come up with their own plans. Trying to coerce someone into a trip that they don't want AND that they have to pay for is a recipe for disaster.

I'm trying to think back to how my teenage self would have reacted to this. I waited tables in high school, and I remember how hard it was to save up money for stuff I wanted to buy. I can't imagine being asked to save enough money to go to Disney when I didn't even want to go!

Let the two who want the trip go. The third can stay home. It's all about choices. If she doesn't want to go, then she doesn't have to. She can make plans to do something else, either alone or with other friends.

You'd rather ditch your friend of twelve years on a once-in-a-lifetime high school graduation trip that you already decided to go on together just so you could go to Disney again rather than come up with another location that all three of you would be happy with? Interesting.

 

[HappyDaisy]

Yes. There are three people. Two want to go. One does not. Why should the two who want to go miss out because one doesn't? I don't look at it as ditching her. She ditched them. Apparently the 12 year friendship isn't important to her, otherwise she'd go. Why is is the responsibility of the other two to give up their trip to accommodate the one who doesn't want to go? I would go without her. I would not let her manipulate the trip we'd dreamed about for years. If she doesn't want to go, then fine. She can stay home.

 

[ajwolfe]

Yes. There are three people. Two want to go. One does not. Why should the two who want to go miss out because one doesn't? I don't look at it as ditching her. She ditched them. Apparently the 12 year friendship isn't important to her, otherwise she'd go. Why is is up to the other two to give up their trip to accommodate the one who doesn't want to do?

^^ This. I think the girls should work together to try to come up with something all 3 would like, but if they are unable to do so then I think majority rules. No reason that 2 out of the 3 should miss out on what they wanna do for 1. If the third really doesn't want to go, then she can skip the trip and do something else.

 

[MrInfinity]

This sounds like something the two should just plan to do separately. Why on Earth would you want to do something as a trio, but have it be something only two of them like? What's the other girl want to do? Surely they have some interests in common if they've ben friends for so long. Go rafting. Skiing. Mexico. Europe. Do something all are good with, then the two that want to do Disney do that some day. I would not proceed to drag a 3rd along. Big waste of money, and it'll be two planning and the 3rd not interested the whole time. Even if she agreed to go, she'd probly be thinking about how to get out of it, and there's a good possibility it ends up being just the two bearing 50% more cost anyways and the 3rd left out.

 

[HollieS]

An uneven number of people at any amusement park is a bad idea.

I would wager that the 3rd girl wants to go out and party. Disney has the perception of being for families not single girls.