Need advice for teen opposed to Disney trip!

[Art 1]

My daughter and two of her friends since kindergarten days would like to take a trip together for their graduation in late May. My DD and one friend love WDW so we have planned an affordable trip the girls can help pay for from their weekend job money. The third friend has never been to WDW and has no interest in the trip. Being huge fans, we cannot understand her feelings. Any advice for trying to change her mind without being to in her face? It sounds like a dream grad trip to me!!

I wouldn't try at all to convince someone to take a trip that they did not want to take. Why would you?

 

[Seeker615]

That is just it. We don't know the three girls and what they like or don't like.

I think it is horrible to suggest to leave the third one out because she is not interested in Disney. A lot of people are not into theme parks or Disney. I have a lot of friends who would never even set foot in Disney. It's just not their thing and I respect that. You can be friends and have different interests.

I hope the three sit down and have a planning day. Maybe write down all the things they like to do and what they want out of this trip. They should be able to find something they all will love to do. If they are all planning on going to college then this would be a great opportunity for an amazing time together.

 

[JanaDee]

My daughter and two of her friends since kindergarten days would like to take a trip together for their graduation in late May. My DD and one friend love WDW so we have planned an affordable trip the girls can help pay for from their weekend job money. The third friend has never been to WDW and has no interest in the trip. Being huge fans, we cannot understand her feelings. Any advice for trying to change her mind without being to in her face? It sounds like a dream grad trip to me!!

Not everyone is interested in Disney. If I had a parent come to me and say my child was paying for a trip that she wasn't even interested in, I'm sure you can imagine my reaction to that.

Have the girls figure out a different trip, one they can all agree on.

 

[JanaDee]

Yes. There are three people. Two want to go. One does not. Why should the two who want to go miss out because one doesn't? I don't look at it as ditching her. She ditched them. Apparently the 12 year friendship isn't important to her, otherwise she'd go. Why is is the responsibility of the other two to give up their trip to accommodate the one who doesn't want to go? I would go without her. I would not let her manipulate the trip we'd dreamed about for years. If she doesn't want to go, then fine. She can stay home.

What a weird thought process. So if someone doesn't like Disney, you can't be their friend?

How bizarre.

 

[HM]

If you were to ask my DD19, a huge Disney fan, one that wants to be there all the time,she's say that taking friends to WDW isn't always the best idea.

She's travelled to WDW with three different friends at three different times in HS, and found that she wished that she hadn't taken two of them along. They didn't have the enthusiasm she expected, wanted to do things differently than she wanted, and though she ended up with good trips with them, they weren't what she'd imagined.

So, if one friend really doesn't want to go, talking her into going isn't going to work. She'll likely make them all miserable. They need to come up with a new plan.

Would Universal be a choice? Would a beach house be a better idea? A cruise? A spa weekend?

 

[20yBWDW]

I think one of the best things you can do for your daughter right now is not help her persuade her friend, but tell her to try to focus on the most important thing: spending time with her friends. There will be other trips to WDW, but there won't be other trips to celebrate graduation with these two friends, so having a trip they are all excited about is going to be much more fun. Maybe her friend would be more interested in Universal, and they can do a split trip. Maybe Disneyland and an L.A./Hollywood sightseeing day and beach day would appease all of them.

 

[mjkacmom]

Not everyone wants to go to WDW - I know SO many people who have no desire to ever set foot on the property. I know a lot of people who would think that white water rafting would be an awesome vacation - not me.

Hotel, flights, tickets, food - WDW isn't cheap. I wouldn't expect someone to agree to go, with no interest in going. There are only three of them - I'm sure they can come up with something they'd all like to to.

BTW, I still keep in touch with almost all of my HS friends, and college friends. There's no replacing them.

 

[HopperFan]

DD is 21. Her choice was to travel to WDW for her high school graduation with one friend. I think for us the point was for our DD to go somewhere she wanted to go and invite someone she thought would have fun with her. They had a great trip!! She has now graduated from college and been here since August on DCP and will finish in May. So I get how you are looking at this.

Without more information, had you considered that maybe this young lady does not want to go on a trip at all and maybe saying no wasn't about Disney? I've been through all this and watched the small tight groups evolve and sometimes there is that one (and my DD was that at times) that feels slightly on the outside from the others. If she doesn't know Disney she may see it as an amusement park where it will always seat 2 and she feels she will be odd man out.

I would have your DD sit down with her and talk with the girl. Ask her, without putting her on the spot so she can be honest. If we change our destination would you be interested in going with us? She may say no for a variety of reasons, then you all go on with your planning. If she says yes then find out what would be a good place to go they would all enjoy and within everyone's budget. By your description this was a group trip so it doesn't matter where it goes to. Disney could be planned by the other two at another time.

 

[Gumbo4x4]

Go someplace else all three can agree on. Going to Disney isn't everybody's idea of a dream vacation, and I'd venture to guess that most people who have to be convinced to go to Disney don't end up enjoying themselves.

This! I went to Daytona with 5 friends after graduation & got dragged to MK for a day. Sunniest day of the whole trip & I couldn't believe we wasted it at Disney instead of the beach.

 

[JennaDeeDooDah]

Would a Disneyland trip be possible? That way, your daughter and one friend could really enjoy the Disney side of things, but they wouldn't need to spend as many days there and could branch out. They could visit the San Diego zoo, go surfing at the beach, visit Knotts Berry Farm, take one of those bus tours of the stars' homes, put their hands in the cement at the Chinese theater, and all sorts of other things. It might be the best way for everyone to get the trip that they were wanting.

 

[IWannaBuildASnowman]

My daughter and two of her friends since kindergarten days would like to take a trip together for their graduation in late May. My DD and one friend love WDW so we have planned an affordable trip the girls can help pay for from their weekend job money. The third friend has never been to WDW and has no interest in the trip. Being huge fans, we cannot understand her feelings. Any advice for trying to change her mind without being to in her face? It sounds like a dream grad trip to me!!

And, with respect, it sounds like torture to others. Not everyone likes what everyone else likes.

Disney is not cheap, and to young adults money from weekend jobs is precious. I can absolutely understand her not wanting to spend her cash on something she does not want to do no matter how "affordable" it seems.

Your daughter and her friends need to look at alternatives to do things together that everyone will enjoy. Surely they learned that in kindergarten, right? Find a way to play together? And being a supportive parent and a seasoned traveller, you will help them find affordable ways to go to a different place of their choosing too, right?

 

[Gumbo4x4]

An uneven number of people at any amusement park is a bad idea.

I would wager that the 3rd girl wants to go out and party. Disney has the perception of being for families not single girls.

The odd number is definitely worth consideration.

 

[Candleshoe]

I think one of the best things you can do for your daughter right now is not help her persuade her friend, but tell her to try to focus on the most important thing: spending time with her friends. There will be other trips to WDW, but there won't be other trips to celebrate graduation with these two friends, so having a trip they are all excited about is going to be much more fun. Maybe her friend would be more interested in Universal, and they can do a split trip. Maybe Disneyland and an L.A./Hollywood sightseeing day and beach day would appease all of them.

Absolutely!!

I think it's bizarre all the people who are suggesting dropping the third girl "because Disney".

OP as her mom, the only one you should be persuading is your daughter, not the friend. And persuading her that friendship is more important than Disney.

 

[wareagle57]

They should all go somewhere together, but that doesn't mean your daughter can't try to convince her to give it a shot. Most people who have never been to Disney probably have no interest in every going until they have kids because that's who they think it is for. I'd try to tell her about how many adults go without kids and all the things there are for non-kids to do. Does she even like Disney movies? If not, then it might be a hopeless endeavor.

 

[IBLarsen]

First, has the 3rd girl ever been? If she has and still doesn't want to, I'd say there is no changing her mind. HOWEVER, if she hasn't been, she may have a certain perception of what it is. You could always pull up youtube videos of different things in the parks to show her what they are like. Depending on her interests, there may be something not ride related she may enjoy. The resort pools maybe... Hanging out at Downtown Disney for an evening. Or even knowing there are larger thrill rides, that aren't 'babyish' may be her cup of tea. There are so many videos online, that seeing what Disney really has to offer may change her perception, or it may not. But it's worth a shot, so she can make an informed choice. Again, if she's been and is familiar with the parks, then all the videos in the world won't help
Or if it's a beach she wants...maybe split the stay to go to a local beach for part of the time? See if there's a compromise that makes everyone happy so they can all be together.

 

[avic77]

Encourage your daughter and her friends to discuss what they imagine doing for their "senior trip" have them each make a list. Things I really like and want to do, Things I hate and dont wanna do.
Example:
Girl A: loves all things Disney
Girl B: loves Animals, going to musicals, shopping, and sleeping in
Girl C: Likes Sunny days laying on the beach, afternoon naps, and evenings dancing at the club and wants to be a marine Biologist

Orlando has plenty for all 3 types. After they discuss what they like and want they can make a list of things to do.
Maybe a trip to Seaworld and a night at City Walk in Universal to make girl C happy. Girl B will love Animal Kingdom Seaworld and seeing Cirque du Soleil

 

[Moms]

This has been an interesting thread and as the parent of a fully grown adult daughter I can admit that when she was a high school graduate there was NO WAY she would have been allowed to go on a trip "out of town" without adult "supervision" anywhere EXCEPT (perhaps) WDW. It is the one place where as a parent I ever felt it was even reasonably safe to allow a youngster to move about "alone".

I realize that technically 18 is an "adult" but really ??? If the trip is for the girls on their own I would continue to try to convince the third girl that they will have a great time and if it is going to include adults then I would try to sell the fact that WDW is a place where they could enjoy "maximum" freedom as it is a very safe place. What are the thoughts of the other girl's parents in all of this?

 

[SabbyR]

If you were to ask my DD19, a huge Disney fan, one that wants to be there all the time,she's say that taking friends to WDW isn't always the best idea.

She's travelled to WDW with three different friends at three different times in HS, and found that she wished that she hadn't taken two of them along. They didn't have the enthusiasm she expected, wanted to do things differently than she wanted, and though she ended up with good trips with them, they weren't what she'd imagined.

So, if one friend really doesn't want to go, talking her into going isn't going to work. She'll likely make them all miserable. They need to come up with a new plan.

Would Universal be a choice? Would a beach house be a better idea? A cruise? A spa weekend?

Couldn't agree more. My eldest dd has taken her BFF who she is inseparable from in "regular life", shes like a fourth daughter to us. We have taken her on many beach/cruise vacations with us. We know her very well. But shes not a Disney Fanatic like us. After the trip they both agreed to never go to Disney again together. Doesn't mean shes "not a good friend", or wants to "party" or anything like that. Shes a teenage girl with other interests.

 

[nugov2]

This has been an interesting thread and as the parent of a fully grown adult daughter I can admit that when she was a high school graduate there was NO WAY she would have been allowed to go on a trip "out of town" without adult "supervision" anywhere EXCEPT (perhaps) WDW. It is the one place where as a parent I ever felt it was even reasonably safe to allow a youngster to move about "alone".

I realize that technically 18 is an "adult" but really ??? If the trip is for the girls on their own I would continue to try to convince the third girl that they will have a great time and if it is going to include adults then I would try to sell the fact that WDW is a place where they could enjoy "maximum" freedom as it is a very safe place. What are the thoughts of the other girl's parents in all of this?

Just curious....what stops them from grabbing a cab and going anywhere else? That is a false sense of security b/c if they want to, they can do whatever they want anyplace they are vacationing. Most of these kids are going off to college to live on campus a few months after graduation, so I'm not sure what the difference is. I agree sending them of to Bourbon street or Vegas might not be wise, but there are still other vacation places that are just as safe as disney. An all inclusive where you never leave the resort could be just as safe depending on the area.

 

[tndisneyfan]

I haven't read every post in this thread, but I just wanted to post my opinion. I LOVE WDW. It's my favorite vacation destination. Now saying that as a 43 year old is one thing. In 1989 we went on a band to trip WDW, I was very meh about it. It was OK at best. At that time in my life I loved thrill rides, WDW had very few of them. I graduated that same year and if someone would've tried to get me to go to WDW for a graduation trip I would NOT have gone. If by chance they could have talked me into it I know I would have been very unhappy and wouldn't have had a good time.

Why try to talk somone in to go somewhere they absolutely do not want to go? Why not go somewhere everyone can agree on?