My neighbor says he is going to sue us..UPDATE pg 8

[Honu]

Hey, my ex-neighbor moved next to you. He used to hang out in his yard here and yell at and take pictures of people walking their dogs. The neighbors named him King Pooper Scooper and he finally moved when someone obtained a restraining order against him.

Your neighbor can file a criminal report of trespassing, but there are no damages here to recoup via a civil case.

You should keep your kids off his property though. Since he has voiced his complaint to you, it's important that your kids respect that property line. The ball passing over there even once a week is too much. Good luck.

 

[swilphil]

I really don't see the big deal if the ball goes into his yard every other day. It's not like you are leaving the ball there, and I imagine it's not there for more than a few seconds. From what I've read, we are talking about his land that is right next to your driveway, but his house is a distance away. It's not like your kids are playing in his yard. To be honest, it sounds like the guy just doesn't want to hear the noise your kids make when they play outside. Are your kids overly noisy? If they are, you might talk to them about being a little more quiet.

It makes sense to me that the kids play basketball in the driveway. You definitely shouldn't have to shell out money for a seperate basketball court or a new fence. If he has a problem, he should be the one to put up a fence.

 

[tiggersmom2]

I really don't see the big deal if the ball goes into his yard every other day. It's not like you are leaving the ball there, and I imagine it's not there for more than a few seconds. From what I've read, we are talking about his land that is right next to your driveway, but his house is a distance away. It's not like your kids are playing in his yard. To be honest, it sounds like the guy just doesn't want to hear the noise your kids make when they play outside. Are your kids overly noisy? If they are, you might talk to them about being a little more quiet.

It makes sense to me that the kids play basketball in the driveway. You definitely shouldn't have to shell out money for a seperate basketball court or a new fence. If he has a problem, he should be the one to put up a fence.

I absolutely agree with this!!!! If he still is a nasty bugger....I would get my morning paper and do a Jim Carrey in his yard (think of Me Myself and Irene)

 

[bicker]

It is interesting seeing how people are split down the middle on this issue, and especially interesting in the context of the article I read yesterday on MSNBC about how boorish Americans feel that they've become. I wonder how many of the folks trying to make this old guy look like a weirdo would have done so back in the days America was more polite. Children used to be taught respect for elders, and would be contrite whenever they failed to take proper care of their balls and such and they ended up on a neighbor's property; surely the children's parents wouldn't become beligerant about how the old man responded to the children's transgression.

Regardless, I'm not sure that this change in attitude is necessarily as bad as the folks interviewed in the MSNBC article tried to make it sound. Clearly, practicality is more important than gentility, and that's basically one way of looking at how this situation is handled has changed over the years. However, I believe strongly in integrity -- it is a moral virtue AFAIC. That means, to me, that while it is okay to disagree with the old man about how much respect you feel the children should have for him and his property, it is important at least that both parents and children recognize that variance from the 1950s model is a measure of disrespect, conscious and justified, at least in one's own mind, which is good enough, as long as it is legal, since there is no universal Truth. It's just like the recently posted issue about public displays of affection. They would never have taken place in the 1950s, but they're not illegal, and in our busy world, there is a benefit to enjoying your partner whenever, wherever. Just another example of conscious and justified variance from what others would want you to do.

 

[Planogirl]

Some people just plain don't care for children. They wouldn't want to hear them and they certainly wouldn't want them in their yard on a regular basis.

Do the man and his wife have a garden? Or pets that might get upset? You also probably have no idea what type of family lived there before you. The kids might have been candidates for Super Nanny for all you know. Have you ever spoken with the wife?

I would try to work with the fellow. You never know, sometimes kindness goes a long way with grouches.

 

[Marseeya]

It is interesting seeing how people are split down the middle on this issue, and especially interesting in the context of the article I read yesterday on MSNBC about how boorish Americans feel that they've become. I wonder how many of the folks trying to make this old guy look like a weirdo would have done so back in the days America was more polite. Children used to be taught respect for elders, and would be contrite whenever they failed to take proper care of their balls and such and they ended up on a neighbor's property; surely the children's parents wouldn't become beligerant about how the old man responded to the children's transgression.

Oh, I don't know about that. Remember Dennis the Menace? What year did that come out anyway?

 

[bicker]

Dennis was always contrite.

 

[Kitty 34]

I haven't read this whole thread but it sure makes me glad that my neighbors are my sister on one side and my parents on the other.

Good luck.

 

[bicker]

<shudder> I just thought about the prospect of living between relatives..... give me crotchety old men, thankyouverymuch!

 

[Marseeya]

<shudder> I just thought about the prospect of living between relatives..... give me crotchety old men, thankyouverymuch!

A big barking dog seems to do the trick for us. Somehow our neighbors have managed to keep their little ones in their own small yards all these years, as have we.

 

[Planogirl]

<shudder> I just thought about the prospect of living between relatives..... give me crotchety old men, thankyouverymuch!

I couldn't agree more. I'm grateful that Texas is so big.

 

[Miller1412]

OP, I wish you could send your kids into my yard to get their ball. They'd always be welcome. People are more important than property.

 

[luv2nascar]

I haven't read all the replies but I disagree with you on this one. I have kids and could care less if neighbors come in my yard for a ball etc as long as they aren't damaging anything. BUT he does care and has told you so. Out of respect for him and HIS property you should not allow your children to play so the ball will go in his yard. Don't you see how disrespectful that is. It doesn't matter why he doesn't want your kids on his property. It is his property and they are trespassing. If their ball goes over there you should not retrieve it at all. He will call the police next and you will get a visit from the officer advising you to stay off his property or he'll be back. Why are manners so different today??

 

[lvs_eeyore]

I will probably get flammed but I would be upset if the kids were coming into my yard on a regular basis also. Three times a week is much too much. We have kids in our neighborhood and I do not allow them in our yard either. If someone gets hurt WE pay the price for it.....same as when it comes to Halloween I sit at the end of the driveway and pass out candy. All it takes is one kid to get hurt on our property in this sue happy society we live in now. I think your neighbor has a ligitimate beef and if I were you I would do something about it. The kids should not be allowed to play where they are and the baby should be picked up and carried to and from the car. You have more than enough property for the kids to play in another area.

 

[coolmom99]

I was in my dining room this afternoon so I could keep an eye on my son when he was playing out front. My older son was out there, too, along with a girl I take care of. A neighbor boy was in our yard, too. There was also a boy I don't know. Lots of kids on my well known grass. You know what? I was so glad to have the kids there, playful screams and all. Yes, our grass is worn from use, but one day my kids won't be playing there and I'll miss it. Hopefully I'll have grandkids playing at my house by then and I'd even welcome neighborhood children, as long as they were not damaging my property.

The difference here is that you have kids, this old grump doesn't.

OP-I think it's awful that you have to walk on eggshells in your own yard but it's in your best interest to avoid problems with this man. It's just terrible when you can't relax in your own home. We had a problem neighbor for several years but it was a little different. He had teenagers and grown children, all of who were losers, and he was just an angry jerk. He used to drive down our street (which is a very small loop off of another quiet road) very fast and if you were walking on the side of the road with your kids he would drive as close as possible to you. One time he almost hit a father walking with his family and the father hit the jerk's car with his hand to get his attention. It turned into a fist fight and the jerk got the **** beat out of him. The police were called and basically just told the father not to do it again but the police had been called about the jerk so many times in the past that they knew he was the instigator.

I don't agree with telling your kids that they should play more quietly. When kids are outside in their own yard they should be able to be as loud as they like. It's really the only place where they can be loud without getting into trouble. I think you should get one of those net type barricades that someone posted a link to and that should work well. It will probably anger him because it does nothing about the noise and it's not the pretty fence that he wants but too bad. If it keeps your kids in their own yard there's nothing he can do about it.

 

[bicker]

I was in my dining room this afternoon so I could keep an eye on my son when he was playing out front. My older son was out there, too, along with a girl I take care of. A neighbor boy was in our yard, too. There was also a boy I don't know. Lots of kids on my well known grass. You know what? I was so glad to have the kids there, playful screams and all.

The difference here is that you have kids, this old grump doesn't.

That's a great point. Let's rewrite that paragraph, in line with my personal proclivities:

I was in my dining room this afternoon so I could keep an eye on my kitten when she was playing. My older cat was there, too, along with a cat I take care of. A neighbor cat was in our yard. There was also a cat I don't know. Lots of cats on my grass. You know what? I was so glad to have the cats there, caterwauling and all. ​

Now, to some of you, that sounds perfectly nice, as it does to me. However, I grant that there are many folks out there who don't like cats, and would be freaked out by the prospect of cats all over the place.
Next, replace cats with snakes.

The point is that we each have things we like and things we don't, and applying our own personal proclivities onto others is hubris.

 

[Stitchfans]

He has no grounds to sue you on. He is just a crabby old man. We had a neighbor like that who recently moved. Thank goodness. He was going to sue us because our snow touched his property.

 

[Tigger&Belle]

That's a great point. Let's rewrite that paragraph, in line with my personal proclivities:

I was in my dining room this afternoon so I could keep an eye on my kitten when she was playing. My older cat was there, too, along with a cat I take care of. A neighbor cat was in our yard. There was also a cat I don't know. Lots of cats on my grass. You know what? I was so glad to have the cats there, caterwauling and all. ​

Now, to some of you, that sounds perfectly nice, as it does to me. However, I grant that there are many folks out there who don't like cats, and would be freaked out by the prospect of cats all over the place.
Next, replace cats with snakes.

We have leash laws here for animals, so that is totally absurd. So you think that kids should not play outside in their own yard? Crazy! People need to take the corn cob out of their you know where and lighten up. Kids can play in their own yard. Kids can also be taught respect for others, whether the neighbors have children or not. It's hard to teach kids repspect for their elders when those same elders do not have respect for them. As my 12yo son used to always say, "it goes both ways".

 

[bicker]

You missed my point. The issue raised by the earlier poster was how much she enjoys children playing. My point is that not everyone needs share her enjoyment, and so it isn't reasonable to expect the same level of tolerance for when such children's play "inadvertently" extends beyond their own yards.

Before you ask other people to lighten up, ask yourself if there is anything you object to that other people do, and are legally entitled to do. Perhaps you should lighten up about those things. Don't get me wrong: We all have our personal preferences, and are entitled to them, but our own personal preferences are indeed our own. They are never valid foundations for judging others.

 

[Tigger&Belle]

OP, I wish you could send your kids into my yard to get their ball. They'd always be welcome. People are more important than property.

Yep!

You know the funny thing, is that sometimes on the DIS there will be a barking dog thread. Unless we are talking about a dog barking for hours and being a clearcut nuisance, many people will support the dog owner as long as the dog is not breaking any nuisance laws.

And I have had kids come onto my property and do damage. I had a bunch of berry plants pulled up twice (they died and had to be replaced). I'm not positive who did it, but I had a very good hunch. And then the grandson of our crazy neighbor tried to climb a little cherry sapling tree and broke it. His cousin told me what had happened, so that time I know he was the offender. So I know that kids can do damage (in the cases of my plants it was intentional damage) and I still don't mind kids in my yard. Of course I have kids, but even when I don't I wouldn't mind a child retreiving a ball.