My heart is breaking for my son **UPDATE Post 7

[EllenFrasier]

Background: My son is twenty years old and is learning disabled. He graduated from high school, went to culinary training school and completed an unpaid internship. During high school and culinary school, he had a couple of part-time jobs that did not work out. One was a grocery store and one was at Pizza Hut. He left the grocery store to work at Pizza Hut because he wanted to work in the food industry. The manager at Pizza Hut turned out to be a real jerk and was swearing at him and yelling at him etc. and basically forced him to quit.

He graduated from the culinary training school a year ago and has been looking for a job since. He had a job coach with the culinary school, but she did not do her job very well. No communication unless initiated by him, and the only possible jobs she found for him were in another city. Now he has a job coach from the Center for the Disabled who is a great guy. He believes in my son which I think helps.

This new job coach helped him find a job at IHOP. The manager agreed that he could start out busing tables, but he was interested in teaching him the restaurant business and working his way up to the kitchen. The manager said he was doing well, the waitresses said he was doing a good job, etc. A couple weeks have gone by and he went there to get his schedule yesterday and he is not on the schedule - at all. He spoke to the manager who said he was calling his job coach because there was more involved in the position then he thought. So my son was in tears yesterday, and so was I. They had a meeting with the manager this morning, and the manager would not tell the job coach any specific things my son was doing wrong or not doing right! How can you fire someone without saying why? He also already hired another person, because as they were sitting there they heard one of the waitresses say "there's the new guy". The manager told my son and the job coach that it was just business, nothing personal. He told the job coach that he could fire anybody he wanted, that it was business and that's how it's done.

So they left it that my son is going back on Friday with his job coach so the job coach can shadow him as he does his job. I'm not really sure why - but at least the coach can see how my son does his job. And I hope it makes the manager there really uncomfortable.

Now I am getting really concerned that my son may not be able to keep a job. What if something happens to us? What will happen to him?

 

[es45]

Ellen, I'm so sorry to read this; it sounds like discrimination to me. Is there any recourse if the job coach finds that he wasn't making mistakes?

 

[bookwormde]

Find the managers boss and work your way up the line.

bookwormde

 

[C&G'sMama]

find the managers boss and work your way up the line.

Bookwormde

ditto.

 

[es45]

Find the managers boss and work your way up the line.

bookwormde

Great idea. I'm sure that IHOP corporate would "love" to hear about unfair treatment of an good employee, especially one who is learning disabled.

 

[kirstenb1]

OP, I'd feel the same way if I were in your shoes. No matter what the outcome, it sounds like the job coach needs to be there each step of the way, so everyone is clear about expectations, achievements, goals, etc. It's got to be hard for you, because you're getting information from everyone secondhand.

 

[EllenFrasier]

Okay, now I am angry. The job coach took my son to IHOP on Friday morning to shadow him while he did his job duties. We all thought that this would not end with manager wanting to keep him, but I wanted to let the job coach see that my son could do the job or see where he needed improvement.

So what happens? That jerk of a manager changed the way the job was done. He made my son bus all of the tables all alone and bring the dishes in the kitchen, rinse them and reset the tables. Of course, one person cannot do all of those duties themselves. He was there for one hour and then came home. The job coach was like, "oh I see what the manager was talking about now"....???What the heck is that supposed to mean??? I couldn't even do that all by myself. I asked my son if that is the way it usually is, and he said no that there is another guy that helps him. I asked him if he was out that morning and he said, "no, he was there but the manager gave him other duties"....So basically, the manager set my son up to fail on purpose!

What is wrong with people? They hired him knowing he was learning disabled, had a job coach, etc. and then fired him? I was just going to let this go but now I am angry because he mistreated my son by setting him up to fail and making me doubt his ability to do the job. This stinks.

 

[bookwormde]

The manager is either scared or lazy and cannot out out a little bit of effort to allow your son to be successful.

call corporate

http://www.ihop.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=216&Itemid=73

bookwormde

 

[karliebug]

Is it possible that the job requires him to do it himself but that the manager was allowing someone to help him out in the past? That would mean he had 2 employees doing one job. If that was the case then I can see the managers point that your son was unable to do the job efficiently. I am sure that your son will be able to find another position with the help of his job coach. I wish you and your son the best of luck finding a position that is a "good fit" for both him and the employer.

 

[lovetoscrap]

He spoke to the manager who said he was calling his job coach because there was more involved in the position then he thought. The manager told my son and the job coach that it was just business, nothing personal.

So what happens? That jerk of a manager changed the way the job was done. He made my son bus all of the tables all alone and bring the dishes in the kitchen, rinse them and reset the tables. Of course, one person cannot do all of those duties themselves. The job coach was like, "oh I see what the manager was talking about now"....??? and he said no that there is another guy that helps him. I asked him if he was out that morning and he said, "no, he was there but the manager gave him other duties"....

Is it possible that the job requires him to do it himself but that the manager was allowing someone to help him out in the past? That would mean he had 2 employees doing one job. If that was the case then I can see the managers point that your son was unable to do the job efficiently. I am sure that your son will be able to find another position with the help of his job coach. I wish you and your son the best of luck finding a position that is a "good fit" for both him and the employer.

Sorry, but it does sound like the job did require all of those duties to be done and the manager needs to have one person that can do it all. It is very possible that the other guy was just helping but may have asked that he only have to do his assigned duties and not extra ones.

My brother has had the same job for years and they have had to combine duties for economical reasons and that put more on to him. His job coach has come in to help him learn the new things. But a few of them were things he just could not do because of his disabilities. He is very fortunate that he has been there so long that they were willing to work around that but my parents are very careful to make sure that they don't ask for many concessions. He could very easily be replaced and they don't want that to happen.

I know you are angry and hurt but it sounds like you need to cut your loses and move on. You don't want it to get around that your son is difficult to work with because you will get involved. If he can't do the job as the position requires then the business has the right to hire someone that can. It sounds like he has a great job coach and they should be able to help him to find something.

Now I am getting really concerned that my son may not be able to keep a job. What if something happens to us? What will happen to him?

This is only one job. There are lots of opportunities out there. Let the Job Coach do their job and find something that will work. One of the reasons that my brother is so well liked at his job is that he is loyal and reliable. The others that do his same job on the other shifts are usually only there for a few months. The turnover is huge and the training takes a while. They tend to get people that don't show up, call in at the last minute and just leave after a few months. My brother has been there for about 10 years I think, and has never missed or been late for a shift. But it also took him several years and several other jobs to find just the right one for him.



And I am very concerned about your last part. Please, please, please think about the what if's immediately and make a plan. Life is very unpredictable and you need to have a plan in place for what will happen in case you are not able to care for him. My parents are lucky that my sister and I know that we will be taking over eventually. But even they have a "nothing will happen to us" mentality that drives us crazy because we want to be more informed now of what we will need to know when that time comes.

If he doesn't have any siblings then you need to be finding out what arrangements are available in your area for special needs adults, or if there are other relatives that would care for him, and the legalities of his care being transferred to them if he will remain dependent on someone the rest of his life. Make a plan and then review it every 5-10 years to make sure it is still the best option. It would be heartbreaking for him to lose his parents and then also be dealing with the uncertainty of where he will live and who will take care of him.