my friend wants me to help her with a touchy situation

[RUDisney]

@MrsCobraBubbles That’s heartbreaking.

 

[nkereina]

PPs are correct - don't do it. I work at a bank, and aside from Medicaid fraud, this also ties into banking AML/BSA laws. When banks are suspicious of instances like this, it leads to paperwork being filed with the government which is added into databases. It can come up way down the line and in areas of life that may have never occurred to you.

 

[Searc]

In my state it is illegal to divorce a spouse who is in medical/mental health treatment. My friend tried to divorce her abusive husband when he had a stroke, she wasn't allowed and was actually put in charge of his care at the times that he couldn't be responsible for himself! She took her boys and moved into an apartment but was still forced to care for her husband, or arrange for his care. You have to satisfy a waiting period before divorcing and even during the waiting period you can physically separate but you can't separate your finances; so even if they separated, the wife in OP's scenario would still be financially responsible for her husband's care. I would guess there are similar laws that apply to OP's friend's situation, and that is why they don't simply divorce.

That is absolutely appalling.

 

[mousefan73]

Fraud, just say no. Now there are smaert ways to tie up money. Does your friend own a home? Spending cash to say replace an “old” furnance roof is ok. Even if repairs are not quite needed. Long term you are saving later costs when maybe your money isngone. Long term they are saving later costs which they would have spent anyways. One tip I always here is as you get older take out home improvement loans. Debt counts against what additional one pays for elder care. At least in our country.

 

[mousefan73]

That is absolutely appalling.

Not really. In this case maybe as the husband is abusive. But if he wasn’t who is looking at his interests/ assets when he can’t. ? This just keeps a spouse from divorcing and running off with assets where an incapitated person can’t adovate for themselves. Or couples legally divorcing just to save/ shift assets. But still in love.


It goes the same way in the other direction. With Social Security and there is a waiting period for new spouses to take benefits. This way you just can’t marry an old geezer about to die and reap Social Security benefits. A waiting period just trys to limit some fraud or asser reallocation.

 

[NotUrsula]

No, not this; definitely would not pass muster. You can pay legitimate debts as part of the spend-down, but they have to have been incurred before the spend-down period begins, AND you have to have legal proof of that.

Due to Medicaid allowances not having caught up at all with the current COL and the cost of nursing home care, she is right to try to shelter what assets she legally can, but this plan is way over the line.

 

[Disneychick75]

I thought this had to be done 5 years before someone goes into a home?

That said, although I feel sympathy for your friends, I would not do it.

 

[Dznypal]

Actually it’s 7 years to gift money. But this a so called loan. At any rate we’re NOT doing it for sure.