My daughter is scared to fly! (What should I do)

[ShortMinnieGrl16]

My daughter is really scared to fly 3 hours to FL. She is afraid she will crash or die. She is super scared and doesn't like the idea of flying. She use to like flying. I keep telling her all the fun stuff we get to do when we get there but she always mumbles "if we ever do get there"



What should I do to help her?

 

[Jrabbit910]

If u dont mind me asking how old is your daughter? and if she is that frightened, is driving to florida an option?

 

[ShortMinnieGrl16]

If u dont mind me asking how old is your daughter? and if she is that frightened, is driving to florida an option?

Oh sorry I forgot to mention her age. She is 14. And no we already planned the flight and we are leaving in 4 days. We live up North. It will be a two week vacation. From up North it would take 2-3 days to get there.

 

[jkCT]

I was going to suggest telling/reminding her that traveling in a car is statistically much more dangerous than flying...but that could backfire as well!! It's a tough one for a kid that age...my daughter (10) was scared the first time we flew but it was more being scared of the unknown. Once we had taken off and landed once she knew what to expect and was fine. Good luck!!

 

[pigletto]

Is it an option to book a late evening flight so she'll already be tired and maybe she could sleep through it?

 

[disney54us]

ditto, I was going to ask the same. How old is she?? if she is older tween or teen then it might be easier finding where this fear is coming from. Things like is this her 1st flight?, are fears coming from things friends have said? Has she flown before? Could this be related to 911, I don't know where you live, not to say it did not affect the whole country, but those living closer had more exposure or know friends with relatives who died. Just today, they had about the (I think it was British Airways) flight that crash landed. So, you have to go about it depending on age. My BGF's, daughter was like that, they went via train jump to 4 years later and her DD just came home from flying oversea's and back. Sometimes, it's something they are really feeling at the time, hopefully you will be able to get her through this. I'm 2hrs./10/20mins. flight in driving time 24 hrs. So if you saying you have a 3hr flight you have quite a bit of a drive. See what you can find out from DD.

 

[ShortMinnieGrl16]

Is it an option to book a late evening flight so she'll already be tired and maybe she could sleep through it?

Unfortunatly, everything is already booked. We are leaving in four days. Her fears have increased within the last week.

 

[Jrabbit910]

Is there anything that she can take w/ her that comforts her from home?
I am sure you keep reassuring her that its going to be alright... When you board you can tell the flight attendants (w/o ur daughter knowing, she might get mad at u) of how scared she is.. they will try and comfort her by asking her questions and just talking to her thru out the flight...
Distractions are key... If there is any sort of project that you can think of for her to stay occupied that will help... If you can print out any maps of the parks, you can tell her to plan some days... whether or not u stick w/ them it will still keep her occupied.

Hope this helps! Wishing you a happy & safe trip.

 

[ShortMinnieGrl16]

This is actually her 3rd flight in 7 years. Don't know where the fear is coming from exactly. Imagination? Maybe she's begun to reach the age of realizing she's not immortal?

As far as 9-11, we flew 1 month shy of the first anniversary. I don't think she knew as much back then as she does now. (9yo on last flight)

Either way, she is now terrified and I'm just short of asking her doctor for anti-anxiety meds...

I'm worried she will flip out the day we leave. I have tried to reassure her flying IS the safest travel mode.

Do they let you use Ipods on the plane and when? We have never used tech devices before. I can have her download a few movies or videos maybe..??

 

[stitchlover]

I flew with a friend back in '06 who had a bit of a panic attack while in flight. Let me tell you, it was not fun. I would definitely talk to the doctor about your options. Your basic anti-anxiety medication (Lexapro, Paxil, etc.) won't do you any good. They take a while to build up in the system. But you could get something like valium or xanax which would help take the edge off.
Yes, you can use your iPod after take off.
As a mother of a child with an anxiety disorder I would highly recommend a visit with the doctor on Monday.

 

[Kaler131]

Yes, you can use an ipod. I usually take my video ipod with me and watch movies. I used to be afraid to fly, but after working for an airline as a gate agent and watching so many planes come and go without any problems, I am much more at ease!

 

[kaylajr]

I have the same fear here in my 14 year old DD.
We live in NY and are taking a cruise in April and were gonna fly down.
She was totally terrified.
and was unable to really talk about where the fears were from.

Plans here have since changed and we are driving so we can make some stops on our way down and back but PLEASE let me know how you make out because we WILL be flying again someday soon I am sure and I don't know how to help her relax about it.

 

[shellybelly72]

My daughter is really scared to fly 3 hours to FL. She is afraid she will crash or die. She is super scared and doesn't like the idea of flying. She use to like flying. I keep telling her all the fun stuff we get to do when we get there but she always mumbles "if we ever do get there"



What should I do to help her?

We just went through this our last trip with my dd..

I talked to her and we discussed things she liked about the plane trip and things that she didnt.We talked about how Flying is one of the safest means of travel.I Let her know its ok to be scared or nervous- with my daughter, we got to the root of the problem, she was scared of turbulence. I found a site that explained turbulence and printed it out for her. she was still a little scared but she got on the plane... Once we got on the plane, I let her know I was proud of her and we talked about all the fun we were going to have once we got to Disney

These are some things we did that helped---

Make sure the day of the trip is extremely low stress-- no rushing around

Make sure she eats well and drinks enough water

pack distractions-- ipods, portable dvd player,books, small pillow or blanket. My daughter held on to her favorite plush mickey and yes she was 14 at the time

Good Luck!

 

[Puccaw]

Not sure you would want to do something as drastic as this but maybe you could get a prescription for some Ativan from your DR, just to take the edge off, if you gave it to her early enough in the day then the effects would wear off by the time you reached Disney. I have the same fear of flying but I try very hard to keep it to myself as I don't want ti put my fears onto my daughters. Best of luck and have a fun trip!

Sorry stichlover...I must have missed your post, you had it covered already!

 

[mollygirl13]

I am going therough the same exact thing, except it is with my Mother! My Mom hasn't flown since 1988. She breaks out in a cold sweat when we DRIVE past Philadelphia Int'l Airport. My sister and I decided that the three of us should do a girls only WDW trip, exception being we were flying. It took my Mom weeks to decide to go. Once everything was booked, she started to panic. She couldn't sleep, eat, do anything. I think the thing she is most afraid about is crashing. So, I started talking to her daily about all of the fun things we are going to do (Soarin', HM, Pirates, etc.)
I went to her house and helped her start her packing. I am trying to make it fun for her to talk about but she is still a little anxious. She visited her doctor last week and he wrote her a nice little prescription. That should get her through her flight just fine!
Some things I am doing to make her travel day earier: getting her favorite breakfast before our 7am flight, magazines, her favorite candy/snacks for the plane ride, iPod fully loaded with all Disney songs/WDW attractions, WDW trivia book, etc.
Good Luck with your DD, whatever you decide! Have a Magical Trip!

 

[pepe of ohio]

I can rationalize with your daughter for I also have a great fear of flying. I have flown to Disney 4 times, all long ago and all before 9-11. These trips couldn't have been made without valium. I no longer care to take drugs to fly anywhere, just not worth it. I've never beaten the fear either but now travel by reain, which I have no fear over. Sure, its easy for someone to say, get over the fear, its safer than anything else, relax, take books and what not, but it's no cure, the fear is still there and a panic attack would not be pleasant.

When we did fly, the end of the trip would be the worse for me, last few days of the vacation especially, knowing I would have to board a plane to return home,, and upon arriving home, the next few days would be the worst, every part of my body would ache from being tensed up and all the stress. Do it again, why? Sure, flying is fast, quick way to Florida but for the few that can't master the fear, its horrible. We're from the northeast part of Ohio, and being on a train for 29 hours is a long time but its the only avenue of getting me to WDW. I've been at this trying to beat the fear over 30 years and the stress of before going and then the return is just not worth the time and energy in trying to beat, driving and train are the alternatives for me, not every one can fly and forcement of the issue would only make the fear greater.

I hope you can resolve the issue and have a great vacation but a vacation should be a relaxing, non stressful stay for all involved.

 

[Swan]

I am one of those that stress for days before a flight and during. My Doctor wrote me a script for Xanax. She gives it to her 15 year old son when they fly. It works great for me I take 1 on arrival at the airport and one when bording starts. I am so scared of flying that I don't get sleepy on this med, but I remain calm even if I see lightning. The med usally wears off in a few hours and I am free to enjoy my evening at WDW without drowsy side effects.

 

[sharonmickey]

Good luck! My DD is 20 and the last few years has been afraid to fly. Medication helped for the one trip but she said it wasn't the flying itself that bothered her it was the worry leading up to the trip. The medication did not help that.
Fortunately she is old enough to travel herself. This past summer she took the train to Orlando and met us there. Too bad that won't work with a 14 year old.

Best of luck. I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

 

[Silver Queen]

Although I'm a person who normally doesn't even take aspirin I recommend seeing a doctor about a prescription for Xanax. I have personally been through this and for years I missed wonderful opportunities (like a trip to Italy) or went on trips and was anxious and miserable during the flights which really spoiled my enjoyment of the vacation.
Valium did not work. Xanax is an anti-anxiety medication and it did the trick. All it took for me was one round trip taking the xanax and having the expereince of feeling relaxed in the air. The next trip I had the Xanax with me but did not take it. Since then I've been on many trips without medication (2 to Europe) and I'm fine. I even have comforted other nervous passengers. A co-worker of mine used the Xanax approach as well and she is also fiine and flies without medication. If you could possibibly nip this in the bud for your daughter it would be so beneficial for her. She has all my sympathy because I know how miserable you can be up in the air when you're frightened. Books, music and other distractions don't help that much. Good luck to you!

 

[DeeDeeDis]

I agree with the last two post, contact your pediatrician as soon as possible and explain in great detail the anxiety your dd is experiencing and talk him into giving her a very mild medication.

I'm also not one for taking even asprins and I've flew hundreds of times without any issues but the last few years I've needed a mild anti-anxiety medication - just takes the edge off, helps ya mind stop thinking about all the "what-ifs".