My child and restaurants-ugh

[Skwinkles]

Sorry if this is repeat advice for the original poster...I didn't read the entire thread cause I don't want to get into the debate of whether or not you should take a crying child out of the restaurant.

My DD is 15 months and we're just starting to see it now, so my first thought is stranger anxiety since you said it the entire time you're at the restaurant, not just after your child gets antsy. Try bringing your child's comfort items with them and give them at the restaurant - a lovey or a pacifier. Perhaps sitting in your lap until the food comes might be comforting enough and then into the high chair to eat and the food might be enough of a distraction.

Good Luck.

 

[Chipmunk89]

I think it's just common courtesy to remove a screaming child.
I see more and more of this "me, me, me attitude".

Just because you think your child is cute when they are banging the utensils on the table, does not mean others think it's cute. Some with little ones looking and pulling people's hair in the adjoining booths. Not cute.

And not all the screaming comes from little ones who are upset. I've seen and heard quite a few that scream/squeal with excitement. Yes, it's cute to you. But not so much for the patron that has the privilege of having their eardrum ruptured.


...putting on my flame retardant suit.....

 

[SmallWorld71]

OP - Just wanted to add a couple of tricks I didn't see on the 1st couple of pages. (I stopped reading the rest because of the silly debate going on , hopefully you are still reading.)

This is a perfectly normal phase. My oldest and youngest went through it. For some reason, DS9 never did.
Anyway,
1 - Never take you child to a restaurant when they are overtired.
2 - Make sure they are hungry (but not starving!)
3 - When our kids were in their rough stages, we always asked, whenever possible for a booth in a corner or a table off to the side. That way, they can have some space to move around without bothering anyone. This is tough at Disney because the places are so busy, but works great a local family places.

Have a wonderful trip!

 

[aubriee]

I think it's just common courtesy to remove a screaming child.
I see more and more of this "me, me, me attitude".

Just because you think your child is cute when they are banging the utensils on the table, does not mean others think it's cute. Some with little ones looking and pulling people's hair in the adjoining booths. Not cute.

And not all the screaming comes from little ones who are upset. I've seen and heard quite a few that scream/squeal with excitement. Yes, it's cute to you. But not so much for the patron that has the privilege of having their eardrum ruptured.


...putting on my flame retardant suit.....

Boy, you have perfect timing! We took my grandaughter out for pizza just a couple of nights ago. The little kid (about 2-3 y/o) in the booth behind us kept screaming at the top of his lungs (with laughter, not tears), hitting me and my GD on the head with his messy breadstick and kept pulling our hair. His parents seemed to think it was REAL cute. We did not! Finally my GD grabbed his hand, shook her finger at him and said, "No, Stop, you're being a Brat". I simply said, "out of the mouth of babes". Both parents got really huffy. Excuse me! I didn't appreciate having to rewash both of our hair when we got home. Plus the kid got grease all over the shoulder on one of my nice blouses.

Last weekend we went out to eat and the people across from us thought it was real cute to encourage their kid to bang his silverware on the table. Again, no one else thought it was cute.

Someone should tell these clueless parents, that not everyone thinks their kid is cute.

To the OP: as long as you are making an effort to entertain your child (and not at the expense of those dining near you) and then if you find you can't, you remove your child until he can calm down, most people won't have a problem. Kids are everywhere at WDW and people expect to see them and hear them. Most just don't want to hear them screaming nonstop for a long period of time.

 

[wdwfanatic80]

So, we have a trip coming up in October. My daughter is 14 months now and up until 2-3 weeks ago, she has been wonderful in just about any restaurant. now, all of a sudden, she cries-the entire time! I'm really getting worried about our meals at Disney. I am thinking that for the most part, people are somewhat understanding in Disney World that kids will be around (well, for the most part-yes, I've read some threads of the other opinion), but I'm looking for some thoughts on if this problem is fixable or if I just have to wait it out.
Sometimes as soon as we get to the restaurant, she starts fussing, doing the "dead weight" thing and screaming at the top of her lungs. Today, after a horrid lunch at Red Lobster I started wondering if different restaurants make her this way. For example, Red lobster was awful. She ALWAYS cries when we go to this restaurant called firebirds (we don't go there anymore-even though my sister works there) but she doesn't cry at Cracker Barrel, this chinese buffet we go to or Golden Corral and pretty much never at fast food restaurants.
I wondered if it could be the lighting? Places like Red Lobster and Firebirds both have low lighting. It's just odd that she seems ok at some places-every time we go and then other places she screams almost as soon as we hit the front door.
Or, maybe it just has something to do with two teeth coming in and it will pass as soon as that is over. Or, maybe it's just that she's a toddler and I need to get over it. Either way, whew-it's making me tired!
We have a booking at Chef Mickey's, Liberty Tree and Coral Reef on our October trip.

OP I have so been there and will be at that age again too soon!!! My dd went through the same thing around the same age and it lasted til around 2. We started implementing time outs. Basically myslef or my husband spent a good chunk of our meal getting up and taking her out of the restaurant and telling her that the behavior was not ok. In the beginning the time outs did not work so well because, she was too young, but we were building a foundation for our expectations. I mean she would not even get into her high chair! Eventually this worked for us. She eventually got the idea that she was not getting her way and would sit in the high chair and behave. We also had a large diaper bag that was full of toys and books. I would start with a couple and constantly have things to change it out with.

Also as a PP stated, we tried to know exactly what we wanted and ordered our food as quickly as possible and made sure hers came out first. We also had a few things for her to eat just in case she was too hungry to wait - that can really make my dd lose her mind! When our food came we would get the check and have it ready to go.

I read a PP that said that the right age to start taking a child our for them is around 4, for us the right age is from the start and then teaching them the manners they need to be able to behave at a table. We always have our children at our table with us at home and enforce our expectations while there. We take them out so that they become comfortable with the environment of the restaurants. Just remember this to shall pass. My dd is almost 3 now, and she has her moments of reslestness at restaurants still, but for the most part she is very well behaved. And quite honestly we never had a problem at the Disney restaurants when I went with her at 16 and 18 months! I guess there is so much going on at those restaurants that she was just well behaved in them, especially the character dining. (Although at the 16 month age she was a bit wary of the characters so be prepared for that.

Overall have fun and deal with the situations as the come, October is still a few months away and I am sure it will all be fine!!! And kknow that you are not alone.

 

[luckey-lasvegas]

Here are some tips from me for the OP I think the debate is silly too!

Always be prepared with some new entertainment, your DD probably isn't going to be interested in the same stuff she see's everyday at home. I used to buy books or little toys and put them away in my bag so I could pull them out just during a special needs time. I also used to ask for a toddler toy for myslef whenever I ordered a childs meal at Mickey D's etc. I put all the happy meal toys together in a large zip lock bag and kept them in my diaper bag, DD only got to play with them when we were out to eat. I also never put her in the high chair until it was actually time to eat. I'm a food server/ Bartender and it bugs the *!!@# out of me when people bring kids to a restaurant and don't bring along something to entertain them. DD is 11 and she knows to bring something with her to keep herself busy just in case she finds us old folks to boring. Good luck and just remember it is just a blink of the eye in the time you'll spend with her. DD has a T-shirt that says Hey I can't be good all the time ! .... and she's right !

 

[gina2000]

Never order before dinner drinks.

Never order appetizers.

Order dessert only after you have seen how your child is acting.

After ordering, take your child on a tour of the restaurant, the outdoors, the restroom and anywhere else until dinner arrives.

Eat.

Determine your child's staying power. If things are going well, order dessert and coffee. Ask that they be brought together.

This works. It's not the most relaxing dining experience you'll ever have but it's the least intrusive, least disruptive, least upsetting. And quite frankly, children are welcome in WDW but most people would like to relax at a sit down meal, not cringe everytime a child carries on.

 

[PrincessTiffany]

its disney, most kids are crying so at least you wont be the only criers



just my opinion, you shouldn't be taking any kid under 3 or 4 to disney, its just too young for them to remember or really enjoy anything

Most kids are NOT crying at Disney - they are having the time of their lives.

And as far as, "you shouldn't be taking a kid under 3 or 4 to disney because they can't enjoy anything." That doesn't even make sense. By 4 years old my kids could ride almost EVERYTHING at WDW. At 4 years of age, Tower of Terror was my middle daughter's favorite ride (and still is)! Most kids are 40 inches by the time they are 3 1/2 to 4 years old (not all, but most) and can ride and enjoy most everything in the parks. The only attracations my kids could not do by 4 years old were Space Mountain, Mission Space, Everest and Rockin Roller Coaster. So that's 4 attractions they could not ride, out of the literally hundreds that they could. And for those 4 rides we, and anyone else for that matter, can to Rider/Child Swap.

OP, don't fret. I know ya'll are going to have a magical vacation. Just take it one sweet moment at a time. If she freaks out, ya'll can just take turns eating and trying to calm her. All of us parents have been there before. Who knows? She just may be a perfect little angel at every restaurant you go to. Sometimes, they surprise you! Again, I hope ya'll have a magical vacation.

 

[maxiesmom]

i
just my opinion, you shouldn't be taking any kid under 3 or 4 to disney, its just too young for them to remember or really enjoy anything

That is just plain crazy talk! My youngest niece went for the first time at 3 months of age. And then again a year later. And while she may not remember anything, she was having a great time! And we have the video of her bobbing her head and having a grand old time at breakfast in the Castle. Pictures of Tigger and Pooh patting her on the head at the Crystal Palace. And not only do we treasure those memories, she sees them now and knows that she had a great time at Disney even when she was little.

 

[thegrimdwarf]

That is just plain crazy talk! My youngest niece went for the first time at 3 months of age. And then again a year later. And while she may not remember anything, she was having a great time! And we have the video of her bobbing her head and having a grand old time at breakfast in the Castle. Pictures of Tigger and Pooh patting her on the head at the Crystal Palace. And not only do we treasure those memories, she sees them now and knows that she had a great time at Disney even when she was little.

I totally agree with this sentiment - CRAZY TALK!!! Parents take their young children to Disney in order to enjoy seeing Disney through their child's eyes - not in the hopes the child will remember it. I've been to Disney nearly 2 dozen times, but not once as Mom. I cannot wait. I'm certain it will be an entirely different place when viewed through the eyes of my 2 and 4 year old.

 

[PrincessTiffany]

I totally agree with this sentiment - CRAZY TALK!!! Parents take their young children to Disney in order to enjoy seeing Disney through their child's eyes - not in the hopes the child will remember it. I've been to Disney nearly 2 dozen times, but not once as Mom. I cannot wait. I'm certain it will be an entirely different place when viewed through the eyes of my 2 and 4 year old.

You are right! I have loved Disney since I was a young child, but the first time my husband and I took our children, well, it was magical. The look on my oldest daughter's face when she saw the castle for the first time - it's a priceless memory. It makes me tear up just thinking about it!

My BIL and SIL went with us this past September and my niece was 2 1/2 years old. We all had such a great time. The pictures of my niece, when she first met Cinderella, are so precious. She even rode Goofy's Barnstormer. It was her favorite ride!

Ya'll are going to have a fantastic vacation with your 2 and 4 year olds!

 

[Aliceacc]

This is the first time we've taken our kids, and our youngest is 5.

But it's a question of economics, not of waiting until the kids were of an appropriate age.

If any place on earth is geared towards kids, it's Disney. They may not REMEMBER having fun, but trust me: parents can tell when their kids are having fun (as opposed to when they're not.)

My uncle spent many years in a VA hospital, the victim of a series of strokes that left him with no short term memory. So he would remember growing up in Brooklyn, but mistook me for his "first wife" because I visited him so often. When I came, I would always stop at the Carvel down the block from the hospital and pick up his favorite sundae.

I knew that Uncle John would not remember that I had been there or that he had loved the sundae. That was OK. He enjoyed it while he was eating it-- he had those moments of bliss diving into the ice cream. That's what mattered.

It's the same thing with young kids. None of us is promised a tomorrow. So whether or not a person is likely or capable of remembering doesn't matter. Sometimes living in the moment is what it's all about.

 

[ameemom]

That is just plain crazy talk! My youngest niece went for the first time at 3 months of age. And then again a year later. And while she may not remember anything, she was having a great time! And we have the video of her bobbing her head and having a grand old time at breakfast in the Castle. Pictures of Tigger and Pooh patting her on the head at the Crystal Palace. And not only do we treasure those memories, she sees them now and knows that she had a great time at Disney even when she was little.

I totally agree. We took our daughter at 3 months to magic kingdom. At one point in the day she burst into a giggle fit. She had maybe chuckled before, but she was nonstop belly laughing for almost 5 mins. Maybe she didn't understand Mk, or remembers it.. but we got it all on tape, and I will never ever forget that moment. We took her again at 9 months she learned to wave, and walked to mickey mouse. Again all on tape, and I will never forget those moments.. You can't get memories like that at a mall. Not taking little ones till their older is plain crazy..

 

[Chipmunk89]

Boy, you have perfect timing! We took my grandaughter out for pizza just a couple of nights ago. The little kid (about 2-3 y/o) in the booth behind us kept screaming at the top of his lungs (with laughter, not tears), hitting me and my GD on the head with his messy breadstick and kept pulling our hair. His parents seemed to think it was REAL cute. We did not! Finally my GD grabbed his hand, shook her finger at him and said, "No, Stop, you're being a Brat". I simply said, "out of the mouth of babes". Both parents got really huffy. Excuse me! I didn't appreciate having to rewash both of our hair when we got home. Plus the kid got grease all over the shoulder on one of my nice blouses.

Last weekend we went out to eat and the people across from us thought it was real cute to encourage their kid to bang his silverware on the table. Again, no one else thought it was cute.

Someone should tell these clueless parents, that not everyone thinks their kid is cute.

To the OP: as long as you are making an effort to entertain your child (and not at the expense of those dining near you) and then if you find you can't, you remove your child until he can calm down, most people won't have a problem. Kids are everywhere at WDW and people expect to see them and hear them. Most just don't want to hear them screaming nonstop for a long period of time.

Aubriee, we must have met the same family!!

 

[LoveTwoTravel]

Along the same lines as this thread are the parents who allow children (older) to use the pool use late at night at the resorts when those children are making loud noise.

There's nothing wrong with an after dinner swim, however when it's 8:00+ at night and they are screaming and shrieking at the pool and playing like it's 2:00 in the afternoon is incredibly intrusive.

Most of the same reasoning applies: people have paid for the resort rooms and don't enjoy hearing screaming *children* ('tweens, etc.) while they are trying to relax.

I think what we're all after is some common courtesy, be it at the restaurants and the pool.

HOWEVER, I think we should ALL try to look at every situation with at least some sympathy and understanding and giving of the benefit. Life is too short.

 

[crisi]

Along the same lines as this thread are the parents who allow children (older) to use the pool use late at night at the resorts when those children are making loud noise.

There's nothing wrong with an after dinner swim, however when it's 8:00+ at night and they are screaming and shrieking at the pool and playing like it's 2:00 in the afternoon is incredibly intrusive.

Most of the same reasoning applies: people have paid for the resort rooms and don't enjoy hearing screaming *children* ('tweens, etc.) while they are trying to relax.

I think what we're all after is some common courtesy, be it at the restaurants and the pool.

Honestly, the pool is problematic at 2:00 in the afternoon if you are trying to put a little one down for a nap. We try and avoid - if at all possible - rooms that overlook pools. It isn't reasonable to expect kids not to make noise in pools - unlike restaurants etiquette which is based around sitting and quiet conversation, pool etiquette generally involves fairly loud play (unless you are lane swimming or something). And it isn't fair to expect kids in the pool (where they are expected to be noisy) to be quiet because you have a kid trying to nap at 2:00, going to bed at 8:00, or come from the West Coast and are still trying to sleep at 11:00 (only 7am if you are from California!).

We also avoid rooms close to elevators, if we can - because while I think its reasonable to expect parents attempt to keep their kids from running and screaming down the hallways in the morning in their excitement to get to the parks - I don't know if the kids that aren't corrected are any worse than the parents running after the kids shouting (quietly, but loud enough for their kids to hear them - which is loud enough to be heard inside the room) "be quiet! People are still sleeping!" (That's me, by the way - trying hard to keep my kids from waking you up - and perhaps making the whole thing worse in the process).

 

[tlens]

Along the same lines as this thread are the parents who allow children (older) to use the pool use late at night at the resorts when those children are making loud noise.

There's nothing wrong with an after dinner swim, however when it's 8:00+ at night and they are screaming and shrieking at the pool and playing like it's 2:00 in the afternoon is incredibly intrusive.

Most of the same reasoning applies: people have paid for the resort rooms and don't enjoy hearing screaming *children* ('tweens, etc.) while they are trying to relax.

I think what we're all after is some common courtesy, be it at the restaurants and the pool.

HOWEVER, I think we should ALL try to look at every situation with at least some sympathy and understanding and giving of the benefit. Life is too short.

Seriously?

8pm is not late and if kids want to have some fun at the pool (maybe not shreiking but kids sometimes do do that) then they should. If it's 11pm, that's a different story but 8pm shouldn't be considered intrusive. If it is, perhaps a room overlooking the parking lot might be better for you.

(and I don't allow my children to shriek at the pool or yell but I'm not going to get all bent out of shape if it happens at the pool. 2pm is fair game...and yes, I've tried to get a child to sleep when there's been noise. It's a hotel. There's trucks and people outside at my house at 2pm too).

 

[LoveTwoTravel]

There's nothing wrong with an after dinner swim, however when it's 8:00+ at night and they are screaming and shrieking at the pool and playing like it's 2:00 in the afternoon is incredibly intrusive.

Seriously?

8pm is not late and if kids want to have some fun at the pool (maybe not shreiking but kids sometimes do do that) then they should. If it's 11pm, that's a different story but 8pm shouldn't be considered intrusive. If it is, perhaps a room overlooking the parking lot might be better for you.

That's why I said "playing LIKE it was 2:00" was a problem after 8:00 pm IF they were screaming and being loud. That's what I said was intrusive.

I'm so sorry there are trucks and people outside your house when you're trying to get your children to sleep. That must be a lot to cope with. Have you tried a noise machine (white noise)? That may help.

Peace and love, people. ;D

 

[tlens]

That's why I said "playing LIKE it was 2:00" was a problem after 8:00 pm IF they were screaming and being loud. That's what I said was intrusive.

I'm so sorry there are trucks and people outside your house when you're trying to get your children to sleep. That must be a lot to cope with. Have you tried a noise machine (white noise)? That may help.

Peace and love, people. ;D

White noise machines were godsends when my kids were little! But you know, I just go with the flow and adapt to whatever.

 

[LoveTwoTravel]

I'm hoping we'll all be soooo tired from the day we'll sleep no matter what! But I may pack the white noise machine anyway...AND request a non-pool view.