Mommies MORE advice PLEASE!!!(sleep ?)

[antkim]

O.K. after bragging last week about how great Mattie has been sleeping it has now backfired! He has been sleeping through the night for a few months now(he's almost 6 months)usually 10-11 hours! Last week I bragged about 13 hours!!! I should have known better than to do that! He has a cold now-low grade fever, coughing, sneezing, red throat etc. I took him to the ped. yesterday and he told me to just give him tylenol, motrin or pedicare. So here's my problem.... 3 out of the 4 past nights he has been waking up and screaming!! A couple of nights I rocked him back to sleep BUT last night I tried to just comfort him without picking him up because I read somewhere that they might get used to it and expect it even when they are not sick therefore you should just comfort them by rubbing their back, giving them their pacifiers etc. Well he screamed for 2 hours!! I finally got him sound asleep and he woke a few hours later (5:30) and never went back into a deep sleep but he wasn't crying. So my ? is my heart is telling me to pick him up if it happens again tonight but my head is saying DON'T! What do I do? I want to comfort him and make him feel better but I don't want to create a new waking habit. I want to do the right thing. I know he can fall asleep on his own because it is not unlike him to wake for a bit during the night and play for a while and then go back to sleep. He just doesn't seem to able to do it right now. HELP!!!

Kim

 

[Jenn Lynn]

Pick him up!
Would you leave your other Son crying? He is a baby. He is sick. He needs comfort.

I guess I just don't get it.

 

[KiminChicago]

Could it be an ear infection? That's exactly the sort of behavior we had with my daughter whenever she got a cold and every time the doctor told us she had an ear infection. Fortunately she's older now and getting much better at blowing her nose!

 

[Serena]

I could never let them cry it out. Thier cries tore at my heart and I just couldn't do it. It did cause some problems down the road, it really did. But I dealt with that when the time came. I just couldn't let them cry.

Some people can, and it does help in the long run if you can. It would take a strong will than I have.

 

[Disneylvr]

Our pediatrician said to hold our dd when she wasn't feeling well and was awake at night. It is the only way to comfort them. It sounds alot like an ear infection. This is exactly how our 13 month dd is when her ears are hurting her. The pain is so much worse when the poor baby is lying down. I say is it definately okay to pick him up and hold/rock him!

 

[nowellsl]

Even if he doesn't have an ear infection, he still may be experiencing pain from congestion/fluid in his ears. Picking him up and having him sit up might relieve the pain/congestion. I would never not pick him up when he's sick - he probably wouldn't be crying if he weren't experiencing some pain or discomfort!

 

[Pete's Mom]

I never let Pete cry it out. Get a swing and crank it up. It worked wonders for Pete. As for YOU ever sleeping through the night again, hang it up sister. Those days are over.

My best advice to you is sleep when he sleeps. Even if it during the day take a little nap, hopefully this will pass when he feels better.

 

[CEDmom]

Poor little guy. Any time DD is sick I throw logic out the window. I do whatever it takes to make her feel better because in the end it will make me feel better as well. DH and I have slept in DD's bed, let her sleep in our bed, brought her downstairs to watch a video at 2am, given her ice pops for breakfast etc. Yes, when she was really young it was hard for a day or 2 to get back into our normal routine once she was better. However, it was worth it knowing I was doing what comforted my DD. Hope he's better soon.

 

[Serena]

A few times when my babies were congested, I would sleep on the couch. I'd be propped up with pillows and such. I'd have the baby laying on my chest and then we both could sleep.
I'd have on a baby carrier or something so that even if I did move one way or another that she wouldn't fall off.
My babies were happiest laying against me with being able to feel skin. They loved my neck and ears. It would almost always relax them.

 

[TEENEE]

When my kids were small I would do whatever made them feel better. If it meant picking them up an rocking them or sleeping on the couch with them it was alright by me. As someone else said it would be rough for a few days after they were feeling better but it was worth it to get through those sick days. I have also given my kids freeze pops and watched tv at odd hours with them just to make them feel better.

Hope he's feeling better soon.

 

[antkim]

I feel like the worst mother in the world right now. I have tears running down my face right now. I guess I deserve it. The only reason why I even attempted to comfort him without picking him up was because even when I rocked him he didn't seem to be getting into a deep sleep. I know that when I put him in for naps if he falls asleep in my arms he wakes much sooner than if he goes to sleep on his own. I thought maybe he was waking expecting to be in my arms He doesn't have an ear infection if he did I would never ? what to do- I know it hurts when they are lying down. I didn't leave him all alone crying. I would rub his back, give him his pacifier and talk to him. He would start to drift off to sleep and then roll over and wake again. I really think one of the problems is his nose is a little stuffy so he can't suck on his pacifier the way he likes to.
As for me not getting sleep-I haven't slept more than 2 hours in a row since I was pregnant with 1st DS!! I'm constantly up checking on them-every night. So I'm really not a bad Mommie!! Bad decision last night-not to be repeated again.
You probably all think poorly of me now. Sorry.

Kim

 

[meandtheguys]

Aw Kim, you poor thing! My heart just breaks for the way you are feeling. You sound like an awesome mom, and you are tired. Go easy on yourself, please. When my guys got their sleep messed up, it only took a day or two to get it back together once they were feeling better. Please take care of yourself and your little guy.

Michelle

 

[peg2001]

No one thinks badly of you at all. You are obviously a very loving caring mom. Just follow your heart and you won't go wrong.

I did almost everything "wrong" with my two when they were babies. . .nursing and rocking them to sleep every night and every time they woke up at night. Just what all the experts warn you NOT to do. Guess what? I never had to let them cry it out and they both sleep like angels now, at 4 and 7. Guess it wasn't so bad after all.

Peggy

 

[antkim]

Thanks guys! I can't stop crying- I think I might be a little tired! I feel better just knowing what I wil do tonight!!

Kim

 

[faithinkarma]

I feel like the worst mother in the world right now. I have tears running down my face right now. I guess I deserve it.

Hang in there Kim, things will get better I promise. Trust your own instincts above all else. That is the best advice I can give you. You are not a bad mother. Anyone hinting that you are is way out of line.

 

[Kermit]

{{{Hugs}}} You're probably just tired. You're a good mommy.

I try to think about things this way. Even if I pick Jacob up and do all the "wrong" things (heck, he sleeps in our bed), he's not going to need those things in high school. There's going to be a day when he refuses to cuddle with me to go to sleep and he insists on being in his own bed. If it takes us a little longer to get to that point that it takes for the neighbors and their baby, fine. I'm willing to deal with it. Whatever you do, you won't ruin your baby, and he will go to sleep on his own eventually. Just do what your heart says that he needs right now. You can always change your mind next week when he's feeling better.

 

[Serena]

Kim, stop it. You're tired, and stressed and everything a new mom is. No one feels badly about you.
Mom's never know what to do. We always wonder if it's the right thing. Always stress about it.

There are some people that let a baby cry and everything is fine for them and the baby. But it doesn't sound like you will be one of those. Don't feel badly for trying to find out what will work.

 

[LuvBuzz]

I was thinking the same thing as another poster, maybe it is an ear infection. I know when my ds1 acted that way during a "cold" it had usually progressed to an ear infection. He was a good sleeper like yours also! My ds2 is 8 months old and, knock on wood, he sleeps great. Maybe it is something else going on. My heart goes out to ya, I know what that's like when they've been sleeping great for months and then WHAM you're up again.

 

[TEENEE]

I don't think any of us were trying to make you feel bad. We've all been there. You're sleep deprived and worried about your baby. You are a good mom. If you weren't you wouldn't be asking for help. All we are trying to say is don't worry about what the "books" say, follow your heart. Is there anyone that you can get to babysit overnight, just for one night so you can get some rest? You sound exhausted. Hang in there.

 

[always quiet]

Did you give him the Pedicare?? When Kirk was a baby and got his first cold, the pedetrician recommended that. I used it for maybe a day and a half.....it 'wired' him so badly....all he did was cry and cry. There was nothing I could do to calm him. He didn't sleep, even at nap time. I called the doctor and he changed him to triamininic (yellow) and the screaming stopped and thankfully, Kirk slept like a baby! Why don't you try asking your doctor if that could be happening to Matty?

Also, if he is stuffy, try elevating the head of his crib. Sometimes having their heads raised prevents their little noses from stuffing up so quickly.

You're not a bad mommy....maybe a tired and frazzled mommy...but I don't think there is a mommy out there who hasn't felt that way at least once, twice...ok...maybe an even dozen............