Mom against sweets in the classroom

[mjkacmom]

And so, you don't think it's wrong for parents who bring junk food to school to "bring their lifestyle" on other kids? Because that's what they are doing. School is for education, not for parties. Yet again, I believe parties and treats should lay outside the realm of public education and invite people via cards. That way, each parent can make the informed choice as to whether or not they want their child to be loaded with sugar.

My son's behavior is horrible when he has sugar. I therefore limit it. He's 8. He's not going to tell a teacher handing out cupcakes, "No thank you, my mom doesn't want me to have that." It's my place as a parent to parent--not the schools'. That we are all agreeing with. So why don't we take the parties and treats out of schools and put it back where it should be? If you want to have a celebration for something, have it at home. That way, no one objects to the sugar or the celebrations' meaning, etc.

I've lived here my entire life (I'm 42), and even back in the day, you brought in a treat on your birthday. You also had a birthday party. Today, we bring in treats for the kids birthdays (takes 5 minutes out of the day, usually during free time), and kids still have (elaborate) birthday parties. We are not allowed to send in goody bags, just a treat.

 

[janey99]

Hey - now I know what happened to all that candy I sent in for my DS's class cupcake party - our art teacher is in cahoots with this mom!



Jane

 

[Duckfan-in-Chicago]

Guess we have a pretty liberal school as we sell pop-tarts, ice cream and rice krispie treats in our cafeteria. Sometimes we give out cookies too. The horror!

Shame on us.

Pop-tarts are a gateway drug. Pretty soon the kids will be in the corner doing lines of fondant.

 

[disneyjunkie]

And so, you don't think it's wrong for parents who bring junk food to school to "bring their lifestyle" on other kids? Because that's what they are doing. School is for education, not for parties. Yet again, I believe parties and treats should lay outside the realm of public education and invite people via cards. That way, each parent can make the informed choice as to whether or not they want their child to be loaded with sugar.

Parents can make the choice. All they have to do is tell their kids to say no thank you if they are offered a cupcake

 

[creativeamanda]

I believe that other parents shouldn't put little children in the position of having to have the maturity to not engage in an activity that everyone else in the class is participating in.

Thank you. Can you imagine being the only one in the class left out? IMO, it's wrong that other parents would choose to make another child feel like that. Other kids would pick on them, treat them differently, etc. And we haven't even gotten into children on gluten-free diets, kids who are allergic to eggs, etc. The best thing is for parents to truly parent their own kids and decide what their kids will have. Not others.

Again, I don't have to worry about this, and the whole sugar thing with our son has just become noticeable in the past few months, but I, for one, am glad I don't have to fight that battle.

 

[roliepolieoliefan]

And so, you don't think it's wrong for parents who bring junk food to school to "bring their lifestyle" on other kids? Because that's what they are doing. School is for education, not for parties. Yet again, I believe parties and treats should lay outside the realm of public education and invite people via cards. That way, each parent can make the informed choice as to whether or not they want their child to be loaded with sugar.

My son's behavior is horrible when he has sugar. I therefore limit it. He's 8. He's not going to tell a teacher handing out cupcakes, "No thank you, my mom doesn't want me to have that." It's my place as a parent to parent--not the schools'. That we are all agreeing with. So why don't we take the parties and treats out of schools and put it back where it should be? If you want to have a celebration for something, have it at home. That way, no one objects to the sugar or the celebrations' meaning, etc.

Kids have to have some fun at school. It can't always be teach learn teach learn. They will get bored. They're kids. Our school also hands out the birthday treats at snack time so it takes no time away from their studies.

And I believe at 8 yo your son is way old enough to know you don't want him to have sweets and say no thank you. And if he doesn't , he's already displaying behavior, that he can't get it at home, so he's definetly going to induldge when you are not there. What happens when he gets invited to a birthday party? Do you stand over him and make sure he has no cake and ice cream?

I'm happy our school still allows holiday parties and birthday treats. They are little kids for goodness sake. There will be plenty of time for learn learn learn, when they reach middle and high school where there are no parties or recess.

And by not allowing treats in the classroom, aren't you shoving your beliefs down my throat also? No reason an 8yo can't say no thank you, I seen 3 and 4 yo's do it in my daughters preschool class.

 

[luvmy3]

I believe that other parents shouldn't put little children in the position of having to have the maturity to not engage in an activity that everyone else in the class is participating in.

Who said they don't get to engage in them. How about parents pack their own snack for their child to eat? There happen to be healthy options for treats out there

But there are things that don't belong in school and that's one of them. Thankfully, I don't have to deal with this because all of my children are in schools who have received the Safe Schools, Healthy Students grant and therefore this has all been put to a stop. Now, when they are invited to a party at a person's home, I can monitor exactly how much they are getting. I'm not worried about other kids--just my own.

Thats your opinion, there are some people who still believe in letting kids be kids and getting to enjoy a treat from time to time during a class party. Sending in 2 dozen cupcakes is NOT the same as the school itself providing junk food everyday to every student. School birthday celebrations are not the cause of obesity in children.

 

[creativeamanda]

I guess we will have to agree to disagree, but I find it very hypocritical that you all are saying you have the right to parent your kids, not others. If you want your kid to have a cupcake at school, then send a cupcake with them. Just don't send one for mine. If you do, then I'll send him home with you for you to deal with the behaviors.

ETA: I never said that cupcakes caused obeisity, but that there are a host of other reasons than obesity not to send cupcakes and sweets to school for other kids--with the major reason being the one many people have quoted--it's not another persons' right to decide what's best for my child. And FWIW, when I take my children to bday parties, my son is allowed to have sweets, because I am there to 1. monitor the amount and 2. will take the responsibility for his actions later. A teacher with 20 other students in the class, however, should not have to deal with that.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

I guess we will have to agree to disagree, but I find it very hypocritical that you all are saying you have the right to parent your kids, not others. If you want your kid to have a cupcake at school, then send a cupcake with them. Just don't send one for mine. If you do, then I'll send him home with you for you to deal with the behaviors.

Teaching your child their dietary restrictions is not my parenting responsibility.

If you have food allergies with cupcakes or other foods and your child, then inform the school and get some resolution on the situation.

I am sure they would be willingly to work with you.

I know kids that were diabetic had an alternative treat system. It can be done and done well, I have seen it and provided it as a past room mother.

 

[MineMail]

This is so true! My sister doesn't allow her 4 kids to have sweets at all and all 4 of them HOARD candy whenever they see it - eating massive amounts at one time and actually hiding it in their rooms.

When one of my friends comes with her family to visit, she and her husband both make comments about how we always have candy and sweets around the house. Honestly, it's usually leftover from whatever the last holiday was and I end up tossing out stale candy regularly.

My friends always say that if they had candy or treats in their house regularly, their two kids would binge-eat the entire dish in a heartbeat. I believe it.

Their son (18) has ADHD and food allergies. Freaks out if someone gives him a cookie that says "may contain peanuts." After he's scarfed it down along with five more. He doesn't read the candy wrappers though, so he's okay shoving those down his craw.

Their daughter (14) is a sneak eater who has a midnight snack every night and hides food/goodies in her bedroom. I once found an entire can of Redi-Whip under her bed that she took for a midnight snack. The girl is overweight and complains about being fat, but can't control herself around food.

They came to visit me in January. The kids ate their way through my candy jar and our christmas stockings like mice, even after their parents told them to stop eating candy. I'm STILL finding Christmas candy wrappers squirreled away in strange places because they went underground to finish off their secret stores, knowing they couldn't take it home with them.

I guess I'll have to hide all the candy the next time they come, but it's really unfair to everyone else who can control themselves.


So, I agree that this woman has a problem and it's her fear of food. 30 cupcakes a year (less than that bec. of vacation birthdays and nonparticipants) isn't very much in the way of treats and as long as it doesn't take away from learning, it's fine with me.

Allergies aren't that big a deal. My kids keep a mental inventory of what classmate is allergic to what food. Nuts are never allowed for sharing foods. This one gets "cah-razy" with sugar, so I reduce the amount in the recipe. I use applesauce in place of oil to make them moist but healthier. So-and-so is allergic to chocolate, so half the cupcakes have to be vanilla or lemon. No problem - I have to make two batches of batter anyway. I really make an effort to "good goodies" and I know many people who do the same.

 

[Duckfan-in-Chicago]

Teaching your child their dietary restrictions is not my parenting responsibility.

If you have food allergies with cupcakes or other foods and your child, then inform the school and get some resolution on the situation.

I am sure they would be willingly to work with you.

I know kids that were diabetic had an alternative treat system. It can be done and done well, I have seen it and provided it as a past room mother.

Exactly. In my kid's school there are a few kids with allergies who NEVER get treats brought from home (the teacher always gives them oreos) and some who eat carrot sticks and celery or whatever the parents decide to pack for their snack. The teacher will not give these kids anything against their parent's wishes or to put them at risk.

 

[dmlashultz]

If you want your kid to have a cupcake at school, then send a cupcake with them. Just don't send one for mine.

I guess I was never trying to force food on kids who don't want it - I guess I was trying to allow my children to share something fun with their friends.

While I understand the desire to have kids eat healthy, it makes me sad that this has become a tense issue. My youngest daughter was in kindergarten last year when they changed this policy, and she doesn't understand why she can't bring a treat to share on her birthday.

In our school, I know certain kids choose not to take what's offered, no big deal. I'm all for focusing on learning, but some of the special things like a birthday treat just make the school year a little more fun.

 

[nuttylawprofessor]

Okay, I mistyped. Apparently, this is only a rule for school districts receiving the Safe Schools Healthy Students grant. I just know we are not allowed candy sales, cupcakes for parties, sodas in the schools, and no fried food in the cafeteria.

I think you are mistaken. SS/HS is a violence prevention program. It focuses on providing safe learning environments for students through violence reduction and better attention to mental health needs of the students. Your district may have passed a different resolution regarding sweets in school, but no state or federal law prohibits sweets in school.

 

[mjkacmom]

IAnd FWIW, when I take my children to bday parties, my son is allowed to have sweets, because I am there to 1. monitor the amount and 2. will take the responsibility for his actions later. A teacher with 20 other students in the class, however, should not have to deal with that.

Each child gets one treat - the teacher doesn't have to monitor the amount. And obviously a teacher does have a say if she's going to allow treats - therefore, she is apparently agreeing to deal with sugared-up kids. If you don't want your child to have a treat, tell the teacher in advance, she'll let you know when a birthday is approaching, and you can send in a healthy snack, like the kids with allergies.

 

[creativeamanda]

I think you are mistaken. SS/HS is a violence prevention program. It focuses on providing safe learning environments for students through violence reduction and better attention to mental health needs of the students. Your district may have passed a different resolution regarding sweets in school, but no state or federal law prohibits sweets in school.

There is a ban on the local 5 districts on sweets in school. This is not in the board manual, but it has something to do with a grant the districts are receiving. The grant is being handled in our district by the same people who are doing Safe Schools, Healthy Students. All memos/etc. come out of that office. Perhaps it has something to do with schools with 75% in the district receiving free/reduced lunch?

 

[Pixie Dust for Me!]

We homeschool our son now due to some significant health challenges. However at his old school, we routinely brought in snacks and special goodies. Not one parent had a problem with it. Yes, we had the typical food allergies (peanuts, soy, wheat, dairy, eggs), so we worked around it.

On my son's birthday, we brought in a whole watermelon, iced it down and sliced it up for the kids. The teacher then had a watermelon seed spitting contest and later planted the seeds as part of a science experiment. Another mom, who had just come back from Hawaii, brought in fresh pineapples (in January)! Another mom brought in rock candy sticks and then did a crystal science experiment with the kids teaching them how crystals form (and how to make rock candy).

Let me also add that we used to always bring in fresh made pretzels from a local pretzel place...and then one kid was diagnosed with an allergy to wheat so we decided no more pretzels so that the one kid didn't have to feel different.

I guess what I'm saying is that a) there is nothing wrong with a treat; b) your "treats" should make sense for the class; and c) parents should be reasonable in their requests and learn to work together. The yelling and blame game stuff gets us all nowhere (not to mention what it teaches our kids)!

 

[DizBelle]

Ok, why can't you just send in a small toy or puzzle or party favor type thing for each child when you want to celebrate a birthday? Those will last a lot longer than a cupcake anyway.

 

[FayeW]

Who said they don't get to engage in them. How about parents pack their own snack for their child to eat? There happen to be healthy options for treats out there
.

If I understand correctly, parents are already sending their own child with a snack for snack time. The problem is that other parents are sending in treats for the entire class to have at snack time. So then a small child has to make the choice to either A) refuse a treat that everyone else is being given, and eat just the snack they brought, B) accept the treat that everyone else is having, and not eat the snack they brought, or C) eat both the treat and the snack they brought from home.

Putting temptation in the way of a child who may not have the maturity or will power to refuse, and may cause them to feel left out of the celebration, is not fair.

I don't really get why people seem to equate "being a kid and having fun" and "celebrating" with sugary treats. If having the kids sing him happy birthday and celebrating at home with his family and/or at his party isn't enough, let the kid hand out stickers or something. Why does it always have to be about food???

 

[creativeamanda]

Each child gets one treat - the teacher doesn't have to monitor the amount. And obviously a teacher does have a say if she's going to allow treats - therefore, she is apparently agreeing to deal with sugared-up kids. If you don't want your child to have a treat, tell the teacher in advance, she'll let you know when a birthday is approaching, and you can send in a healthy snack, like the kids with allergies.

And if it didn't happen at all, no one would have to deal with the kids who have allergies, the kids with diabetes, the kids who can't have cupcakes, the kids whose religions prohibit celebrations and therefore have to be removed for a portion of the day, thereby singling them out. Why are we singling kids out? Why aren't we just letting teachers teach? If I want my kids to go to a party, then I will take them to one myself. When I was in school, if cupcakes were brought in, that meant no instruction for the last 1-2 hours a day. Before the no treat ban on my kids' school, it was the same issue.

 

[LukenDC]

I feel sorry for kids who are caught up in politicized food fights. I have fond memories of ice cream and pizza parties and candy prizes from my grade school days (1978-1991). Between the food Nazis and the heavy emphasis on standardized testing, grade school sounds downright depressing.