middle school woes..

[zoemurr]

Ugh. My DD "R" has 3 best friends. One of them "A" has become good friends with someone else recently. This new girl "M" is someone we know well and have for a long time. She is in our GS troop, and has been to our house for parties. Well, now for whatever reason, "M" has decided she wants "A" all to herself.

She is calling R names and mocking her even though "A" has also repeatedly asked her to stop.

I see this girl regularly and now feel like pulling her aside and telling her that if it doesn't stop she is going to have to deal with me.

I also know the mother very well, and she is very reasonable.

Any ideas? I don't want to tell her to walk away 'cause that is what "M" wants.

DD is not super sensitive and doesn't know how to play these games. It is definitely bothering me more than her, but we need to deal with this girl a lot.

 

[Magic Mom]

Ugh. My DD "R" has 3 best friends. One of them "A" has become good friends with someone else recently. This new girl "M" is someone we know well and have for a long time. She is in our GS troop, and has been to our house for parties. Well, now for whatever reason, "M" has decided she wants "A" all to herself.

She is calling R names and mocking her even though "A" has also repeatedly asked her to stop.

I see this girl regularly and am about to pull her aside and tell her that if it doesn't stop she is going to have to deal with me.

I also know the mother very well, and she is very reasonable.

Any ideas? I don't want to tell her to walk away 'cause that is what "M" wants.

DD is not super sensitive and doesn't know how to play these games. It is definitely bothering me more than her, but we need to deal with this girl a lot.

Do not pull the girl aside and threaten her with "dealing with you." Bad choice. Sit down with your DD (who seems to be dealing OK with it) and discuss ways to handle the situation. Help her be a problem solver in her life. Talk about the possible consequences of her options, and then let her decide. Then monitor the situation.