Looking for advise: sending two 21 year olds to WDW by themselves- first time!

Would you be comfortable spending minimal time now with planning unless they ask? Do you feel you could help them out (and are you willing to help them out) over the phone after they get there?

Now, you would wait for them to call you if/when they feel they want help. You would not call them (other than optionally to be sure they have arrived safely and again on the last day to find out when to pick them up at the airport.).
 
Yikes!!!
Appears I've struck a nerve LOL
I really appreciate any and all of you offering advise, that's why I love this site so much- everyone is so willing to help
I failed to mention this is a SURPRISE gift (they wont know about it till about 6 weeks before)
Maybe I worded my question poorly and gave you the wrong impression of what's going on

I'll address some of your concerns below:

They LOVE Disney and keep saying they want to go back
They are going to be so excited (I'm having a hard time keeping it a secret)
UO is for another time
I'm DEFINITELY NOT planning this whole trip for them
I'm just booking flights, hotel and possibly those two xmas parties
They are gonna have to find uber to get to hotel, check in, figure out which parks to go on which day, how to ride whatever they like, where to eat, figure out how to get to airport on last day and get home safely etc etc
Day to Day they are gonna totally be on their own (genie + or not, that's all on them)
If they show up at the parks at 3pm and waste they day, I don't care, not my Circus, Not My Monkey
They can eat french fries and candy by the pool all day, I don't care
I'm absolutely not giving them a gift with strings attached or trying to control from another state. I just want to do a little planning ahead of time so THEY can maximize their options

All I was looking for was if you thought Mickey's Xmas party and Jollywood would be a good option for them to ride rides with less of a wait (given their tendency to wake late in the day) Since those have to be booked tomorrow (I think) Instead of just getting a four day park hopper I would get two days and two party tickets
Last year when we went to disney we did an after party at DHS, it was so perfect for them. I've never done the MK xmas party and Jollywood appears new. So not sure how those work

And for all of you who mentioned I'm a controlling mother, you may be right, you may be wrong. I don't think I am. I hope I'm not. I actually work very hard at stepping back whenever possible. My daughter has a disability and needs a little extra help here and there. We have counselors that give us really good advise. She has come so very far and doing amazingly. I'm so proud of her.

Again, thanks for taking the time to offer advise. I truly appreciate it
 
I think some of you need to take a deep breath. I have three very adult, very independent daughters, who plan their own vacations all the time. Who very seldom ask for my input. About vacations or anything else. :rotfl: EXCEPT when it comes to Disney. Disney is an animal in its own category. If you don't read up on Disney quite frequently, you can miss out on important changes. EXAMPLE, the new multi-pass Lightening Lanes. One day Genie plus is the rage, and the next day it's gone.
Our entire family is headed to Disney this January, and my daughters/spouses/etc are having me handle all of the planning. I am NOT a controlling mom, who has raised generational imbeciles; I am a mom who loves Disney and keeps up-to-date with the latest Disney news. And, my daughters know it, and know that I love to plan Disney trips. It's a win-win.
 
Yikes!!!
Appears I've struck a nerve LOL
I really appreciate any and all of you offering advise, that's why I love this site so much- everyone is so willing to help
I failed to mention this is a SURPRISE gift (they wont know about it till about 6 weeks before)
Maybe I worded my question poorly and gave you the wrong impression of what's going on

I'll address some of your concerns below:

They LOVE Disney and keep saying they want to go back
They are going to be so excited (I'm having a hard time keeping it a secret)
UO is for another time
I'm DEFINITELY NOT planning this whole trip for them
I'm just booking flights, hotel and possibly those two xmas parties
They are gonna have to find uber to get to hotel, check in, figure out which parks to go on which day, how to ride whatever they like, where to eat, figure out how to get to airport on last day and get home safely etc etc
Day to Day they are gonna totally be on their own (genie + or not, that's all on them)
If they show up at the parks at 3pm and waste they day, I don't care, not my Circus, Not My Monkey
They can eat french fries and candy by the pool all day, I don't care
I'm absolutely not giving them a gift with strings attached or trying to control from another state. I just want to do a little planning ahead of time so THEY can maximize their options

All I was looking for was if you thought Mickey's Xmas party and Jollywood would be a good option for them to ride rides with less of a wait (given their tendency to wake late in the day) Since those have to be booked tomorrow (I think) Instead of just getting a four day park hopper I would get two days and two party tickets
Last year when we went to disney we did an after party at DHS, it was so perfect for them. I've never done the MK xmas party and Jollywood appears new. So not sure how those work

And for all of you who mentioned I'm a controlling mother, you may be right, you may be wrong. I don't think I am. I hope I'm not. I actually work very hard at stepping back whenever possible. My daughter has a disability and needs a little extra help here and there. We have counselors that give us really good advise. She has come so very far and doing amazingly. I'm so proud of her.

Again, thanks for taking the time to offer advise. I truly appreciate it
To answer your question, I think the parties are great fun! MVMCP and Jollywood are very different. I’ve done both and enjoyed them both. Jollywood is more adult and they’ve changed quite a bit for this year (for the better, I hope). So, think about what you think they might enjoy more. I definitely recommend the parties, Cheers!
 

I think some of you need to take a deep breath. I have three very adult, very independent daughters, who plan their own vacations all the time. Who very seldom ask for my input. About vacations or anything else. :rotfl: EXCEPT when it comes to Disney. Disney is an animal in its own category. If you don't read up on Disney quite frequently, you can miss out on important changes. EXAMPLE, the new multi-pass Lightening Lanes. One day Genie plus is the rage, and the next day it's gone.
Our entire family is headed to Disney this January, and my daughters/spouses/etc are having me handle all of the planning. I am NOT a controlling mom, who has raised generational imbeciles; I am a mom who loves Disney and keeps up-to-date with the latest Disney news. And, my daughters know it, and know that I love to plan Disney trips. It's a win-win.
Disney is complicated, so are other locations. It's up to each and every person how they approach a trip, any trip. You don't HAVE to be like a lot of people here on the DIS to enjoy Disney. The individuals in question have been to Disney before they at least know some things. OP did leave out that their daughter has a disability which would be crucial to tell people that on their own they struggle with stuff every now and then. No one picked up that nor would have known. All they got was mom planning the trip, booking it all and worried about if she would get her monies worth if they don't do it a certain way along with advising to give them adult time which combined with the age and impending marital status had eye brows raising as to what the what.

As far as your family vacation it's not the same thing, the OP isn't going on this trip, it's not a family trip. We plan the vast majority of family vacations with my in-laws and they are well beyond the age that they need any help. They flat out told us they would be lost in Cancun last year if we hadn't done it all. It's just how it is. BUT I'm not going to plan their trip to Disney if gifting them a trip nor worry if I got my monies worth, disability or no disability (and I have unfortunately enough in my family and my husband's family with a disability of some form including cognitive and autism including one who got married to another autistic individuals then eventually divorced). If my in-laws would like help of course I can help but in no way would I ever think "allowing them to do this themselves and not wasting a ton of money for a trip that they couldn't get anything done." That's not about asking the DIS about help on if an after hours party should be booked or not. It's also why many picked up on those parts of the OP's comment.
 
People on the DIS love to overcomplicate a Disney vacation and practically break their arms patting themselves on the back for how much better they are at planning than anyone else. It's not defending a dissertation for crying out loud. It's a vacation. Sure, if you love the planning and it adds to your vacation anticipation then that's awesome. But the trip won't be catastrophic without it. Plenty of people go and have a grand old time without doing half the prep people on here do. And I'm saying this as someone who researches and plans the heck out of trips because that's what I enjoy doing, but totally understand that people who fly by the seat of their pants can have awesome vacations too.

Also, the OP framed the original question in one way and then completely flipped the script and left out some very pertinent information in the first post.
 
…the OP framed the original question in one way and then completely flipped the script and left out some very pertinent information in the first post.
Funny how often that happens online after a couple pages of comments disagreeing with the original post appear… my favorite part is when the pertinent information in the follow up post straight up disagrees with stuff in the original post…
 
Universal takes very little planning, except with a few ADRs if they want certain restaurants. You can get on most rides with little waiting if you have the express pass. Also Universal is a lot less expensive than Disney.
I would say your comment "Universal is a lot less expensive than Disney" is subjective, especially if you throw in the Universal Pass. Even if you bought a 1 Day Park Hopper for tomorrow, July 2, Genie+ and ILL for Guardians and Rise, your total would be around $300.

Park Hopper ($239) Genie+ ($29) Guardians ($17) Rise ($25) - 4 Parks and if you get in the Virtual Queue for Tron, it does not cost extra.

A Park Hopper at Universal is ($209) and the Express Pass is ($250) - 2 Parks and that price not include Hagrid's.

Of course I am partial to Disney but let's try to be fair about things.
 
You’ve mentioned that they would love to go back. But do they want to go back because they think that the next time they go, it will also be with you, since they enjoyed the experiences you planned for them each day? If they have to plan it all themselves and manage their days at the parks, will they even enjoy it as much since they probably won’t get to accomplish most of it without some sort of plan? I would first try to find out how they feel through casual conversations without revealing your surprise.
 
I would say your comment "Universal is a lot less expensive than Disney" is subjective, especially if you throw in the Universal Pass. Even if you bought a 1 Day Park Hopper for tomorrow, July 2, Genie+ and ILL for Guardians and Rise, your total would be around $300.

Park Hopper ($239) Genie+ ($29) Guardians ($17) Rise ($25) - 4 Parks and if you get in the Virtual Queue for Tron, it does not cost extra.

A Park Hopper at Universal is ($209) and the Express Pass is ($250) - 2 Parks and that price not include Hagrid's.

Of course I am partial to Disney but let's try to be fair about things.

You probably had a discount. Rack rate is currently $421 that week for the cheapest room.

View attachment 872783
IMG_1211.jpeg
It’s $336 now. It was $296 this morning. This is the seasonal rate.
 
As the family planner, I get it, and I think it's great you are giving them this trip. I have gifted trips to my kids and their friends. I get a room because I have DVC, purchase tickets and cover food. Seems you have that plan down. Other than buying the parties and hotel reservations, you would still have plenty of time to help them plan and purchase the park tickets. Mine have always looked at me and were like, "Can you help us figure out our days?" They knew the app well enough to make their ADRs and deal with whatever LL, Genie+, FP .... what ever they call it now. Maybe less park days so they can go full park days on others? These are all things they can decide, after you tell them about the trip. I would give them the same advice I would give any first timer- If you want to ride all the rides, you should do rope drop! Then the rest is up to them.
 
I failed to mention this is a SURPRISE gift (they wont know about it till about 6 weeks before)
My only comment about a SURPRISE trip is before you have sunk costs, make sure they both have the time available to travel on the dates you've chosen. Whether that is time off from work or school or any other obligations/plans each may have. Someone tried to surprise me with a trip once and it backfired horribly because I couldn't get the time off work.
 
Based on the 'new' post:
Look at a deluxe resort to get the EEH (since they are late sleepers) and see how that fits with the after hours parties. Deluxe also opens up more transportation options.

Base tickets for days needed. Not knowing your length of trip, You could get a couple days of PH's for the days not doing 'parties'.

Since your doing the flight, resort, go ahead and book Mears Connect for them. Their focus can be on Disney. (That also prods them on departure time to MCO)

Make sure they each have MDE on their phones.

Magicbands? The box they come in make a great Xmas package for the surprise.
 
they have to grow up sometime have them pay for something. Like their airfare or food since you have been so kind to them they just except you do it. Do they work cant miss work or airplane.
Have them put input into this trip and really appreciate what you are doing for them. Plan their rides something. Hope all good well.
 
Dd21 flew to Spain alone at 20, her sister did the same at 20 to Italy. She’s now 23 and has planned a 2 week vacation in Italy next month with a bunch of friends, booked flights, Airbnb’s, tours.. At 21 she did the same for her friends to Nashville. Ds21 and his friends arranged a trip to Copenhagen over spring break, no parental help. I suspect a trip to WDW would be pretty easy to manage. My kids have all traveled without our help since HS (long weekends, prom houses). Let them plan the trip.
 
Sending my daughter and her fiancé to WDW by themselves in December (xmas gift and chance to "adult" a little)
Neither are good at planning, getting up early, Genie+ (or whatever its name is now) or being organized. I've always done all this and they just followed along (shout out to all the uber planning moms!!!)
They'd never make it to rode drop. They sleep till noon most days lol
If I don't do a little pre planning, they will just show up at the wrong park, on the wrong day and get into a few long longs and waste their trip

I'm gonna have them stay at one of the all star hotels to make transportation easy.

Thinking of maybe booking them MNSSHP and Jollywood Nights, then maybe get a 2 or 3 day pass for the other parks.
They are really only interested in rides and just being at Disney. (not into characters, shows etc)
Would this be the best way for them to do the rides?
I'm wrestling with allowing them to do this themselves and not wasting a ton of money for a trip that they couldn't get anything done.
Who is planning their wedding??? Do they not have to be responsible for jobs? Time to cut the cord and let them figure out life themselves, especially if they are getting married. Adulting starts at 18, you are not helping here, I respect your good intentions, but....
 
Based on the 'new' post:
Look at a deluxe resort to get the EEH (since they are late sleepers) and see how that fits with the after hours parties. Deluxe also opens up more transportation options.

Base tickets for days needed. Not knowing your length of trip, You could get a couple days of PH's for the days not doing 'parties'.

Since your doing the flight, resort, go ahead and book Mears Connect for them. Their focus can be on Disney. (That also prods them on departure time to MCO)

Make sure they each have MDE on their phones.

Magicbands? The box they come in make a great Xmas package for the surprise.
Thanks! Based on your recommendations, I booked a deluxe instead. Appreciate your reply not containing judgement and widely inaccurate assumptions , just assistance.
 
they have to grow up sometime have them pay for something. Like their airfare or food since you have been so kind to them they just except you do it. Do they work cant miss work or airplane.
Have them put input into this trip and really appreciate what you are doing for them. Plan their rides something. Hope all good well.
How do you gift someone a trip but then make them pay for it? I think people are missing this detail. This isn't about the adult kid and her fiance going with the OP and then the OP asking if they should pay a portion of it. This is the OP gifting a trip, a surprise one at that. If someone gifted me a trip I didn't ask for and then said well you need to pay for these items so you can appreciate what I do for you my answer would be no thanks you go on the trip yourself then.
 












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