Let your DD go to a playdate or sleepover if only dad at home

[TDC Nala]

I remember a thread once where if the daughter had sleepovers, her father and brother would leave the house and stay in a hotel for the night. I guess to assure the other girls' parents that there would be no males on premesis.

If that's what you encounter then you won't get anywhere with trying to change their minds.

 

[KatieCollette]

If I had a daughter, of course I would let her stay over at your house! If I know you and have met you, it's not a problem.

 

[LuvsDragonflies]

It would entirely depend on if I know you well enough for my child to spend the ngiht AND that I like you and feel you can be trusted.

 

[thomas998]

Wouldn't matter to me if it was single dad, single mom or a married couple. My kids wouldn't be staying at anyone's house until they reached a certain age, and only after I had met them and felt comfortable. Being the paranoid person I am I would probably run a background check on them first. But hey, everyone is different. I know of some parents that would let their kids stay with the devil himself if it gave them a night alone.

But once my daughters are old enough, strong enough and tough enough to crush someones windpipe if they try anything, I wouldn't care if it was a couple or single parent as long as I was comfortable and had checked them out.

 

[Bob NC]

This OP has a history,

In case you don't realize it, you are getting one too.

 

[BCV513]

I remember a thread once where if the daughter had sleepovers, her father and brother would leave the house and stay in a hotel for the night. I guess to assure the other girls' parents that there would be no males on premesis.
If that's what you encounter then you won't get anywhere with trying to change their minds.

That's crazy! Who thinks like that? If I had kids and one of their friends' mother told me that, I would definitely think twice. Something must be wrong for that to even cross her mind.

 

[dngnb8]

In case you don't realize it, you are getting one too.

Im well aware of my history. LOL

Dare I say, you too.....

 

[Soldier's*Sweeties]

Am I the only one who says, probably not???

I would LOVE to say that I would be fine about it...and I was about to say I would be...Theoretically...

I think realistically...if my DD asked, I would probably say no.

I'm sure OP is a great person and I know there are other great people out there...but I would more than likely say no.

 

[mamacatnv]

Am I the only one who says, probably not???

I would LOVE to say that I would be fine about it...and I was about to say I would be...Theoretically...

I think realistically...if my DD asked, I would probably say no.

I'm sure OP is a great person and I know there are other great people out there...but I would more than likely say no.

Why? I'm not trying to be argumentative I'm genuinely curious

 

[Soldier's*Sweeties]

Why? I'm not trying to be argumentative I'm genuinely curious

It just wouldn't be something I am comfortable with I guess...I have been scarred by society I suppose. I can sit here and say, "Well it has nothing to do with the chance of her being abused..." But I guess deep down it really does.

I can't even say...Please don't take it personally...because if I were in the OP's situation, I would...

I hope that when DD is of "sleep over age" I can kind of get over things like this...but if I'm going to be honest...right now...the answer would be no.

I know it is judgemental and harsh...but I answered as honestly as I could.

 

[sam_gordon]

This OP has a history, and I am not the only board member to comment on this, of starting threads that typically fall into a category of inflammatory. Threads that are charged for heated discussion. There is a word for that, but you get points if you point out the word here, which I find funny in itself.

Irony

Here's what I don't get... I've seen people call the OP a "troll" for starting these "heated discussions", but why bother? If the thread goes that overboard, the mods will shut it down. If the subject is that offensive, report it.

I don't know if the OP really sees these situations IRL or not, but does it matter? Isn't the point of a discussion board to discuss things? If you don't like the topic, why not skip it?

 

[wdwmom0f3]

If I knew the dad I wouldn't have a problem with it at all. Twice now I have had "issues" with crazy single moms so I am just as cautious with them now, or anyone else for that matter, as I would be with a single dad.

 

[dngnb8]

Here's what I don't get... I've seen people call the OP a "troll" for starting these "heated discussions", but why bother? If the thread goes that overboard, the mods will shut it down. If the subject is that offensive, report it.

I don't know if the OP really sees these situations IRL or not, but does it matter? Isn't the point of a discussion board to discuss things? If you don't like the topic, why not skip it?

Like the thread started by another person that went several pages long that was filled with 4 letter words and vitriolic hate speak?

 

[Pigeon]

If I had met you, and knew you a bit, I'd be fine with it. The same goes for any family where dd is invited to a sleepover.

I do have a few other issues that would make a sleepover a non-starter, but a single dad wouldn't be one of them.

 

[SingleFather]

Thank you for your comments.

 

[mefordis]

My daughter (almost 8) has never done a sleep over, but when the time comes it will only be if we know the parents very very well.

However, I always err on the side of caution when it comes to my kids.

I feel really bad for single dads and their daughters because a few psychotic perverts have ruined it for them and now parents have a hard time trusting anyone, including myself.

This is something that I and other single fathers plus stay at home dads struggle with daily. My daughter has a group of friends she regularly plays with when I am not over-scheduling her . Most of her friend's parents have no issue with them coming over to play at my house, but there are only a few that have said yes when my daughter has asked them for a sleep over.

Most of the time some will ask if my daughter can sleep over there but it is not something you can ask. Nothing is ever said but it is implied they are not comfortable as I am a single father. I get it, I understand the statistics, and I don't bother to point out that women statistically are more likely to physically abuse their kids.

I know there are some who just "will not take that chance", but I am fortunate having gotten to know many of the parents that my daughter gets to have friends over on her "turf" if that makes sense.

What do you would you allow in this situation? Is it different if the single dad was raising a son, would your son be allowed to sleepover with his friend if a dad was the only parent in the house? I have no frame of reference since I am twisted around the finger of a girl and gave up my man card years ago when I sat through a Miley Cirus 3D movie!

 

[Chelley00]

My daughter is allowed to stay at houses of people we know and are comfortable with.......whether a mom, dad or couple. There are some married couples that make me more nervous than the single dad we know.

However, the one time the single dad threw a party for his daughter, he had a female friend of his stay on the couch so that parents weren't uncomfortable with him being alone with their daughters, which I thought was a nice idea.

 

[C.Ann]

DGD (now 13) has been allowed to do this at her best friends house for at least 5 years now.. Her best friends dad has practically become a member of this family and has often come to the lake with his DD.. Someone else? Her parents would have to know that dad as well as they know this one..

On the flip side, DGD will NOT sleep at her best friend's mom's house because of the boyfriend.. He's never done anything - just creeps her out - and the mom has consistently refused to meet my DD & her DH face-to-face - or even talk to them on the phone - during the entire 5 years my DGD has been best friends with her DD.. Very strange..

Short answer? Case by case..

 

[englishteacha]

If I know a child's parent, male or female or whatever, and I trusted them, I would let my child go to a sleepover. If it were a complete stranger, I'd probably say no until I met the other parent(s). As a teacher, I've met some great daughters with really amazing dads who are raising their kids alone. I don't care about a parent's gender as long as he/she is a good parent.

 

[minkydog]

Am I the only one who says, probably not???

I would LOVE to say that I would be fine about it...and I was about to say I would be...Theoretically...

I think realistically...if my DD asked, I would probably say no.

I'm sure OP is a great person and I know there are other great people out there...but I would more than likely say no.

No, you are not the only one. I could lie and say it doesn't bother me, but in truth it bothers me a LOT. I'm sure that SingleDad is a nice, upstanding citizen and my attitude isn't fair to him, but it's the way i feel. I would never allow my daughter to sleep over at a household with only a dad present. Unfortunately, as a child I was molested by two fine, upstanding gentlemen that my parents trusted. Those incidents color my judgement and I hope the OP can forgive me that.