Let the Prom Drama CONTINUE . . . . . . . .

[Sandy V.]

It looks like DH's father is headed to a nursing home. He's gotten more and more difficult and has been borderline violent (sometimes a little over the line). DH says that his dad has always been mean and that the bipolar issue just makes it worse. FIL rants and raves and insists that he wants to go to a nursing home, because he thinks that will keep MIL from having "his" money. He's furious because he can't have his guns or a long list of other things that he thinks he should have.

His mother has always been good at playing the victim and made repeated calls to the kids for help with him. Now, don't get me wrong. I do think the children should try to help with their parents, but she wouldn't do anything they suggested about coping with him. SIL says MIL just eggs him on when she should ignore him or plays the victim when all she has to do was leave him alone. They have a man there to help with him daily from 8 to 5, so she didn't have to wait on him hand and foot, but she does it anyway and then acts pitiful.

The kids have said for a long time that he needed to go to somewhere that could control him, but she refused. She'd just keep calling the kids and making them take responsibility for him. So, DH quit doing it. He wasn't available everytime she called and sometimes didn't answer the phone (she could leave a message if it was a real emergency). After awhile of that, she's decided that he needs to go somewhere...

He does need to go somewhere. He's thrown objects at people before, and even though he's pretty frail, so is MIL, and he could definitely hurt her at some point. DH and his sister agree that all the years of her waiting on him hand and foot are contributing to how he's acting now (although some of it is definitely mental).

Awww . . . sorry about your FIL, but it does sound like a nursing home is really the best option here. Sounds like it would be best for your MIL, even if she doesn't see it that way (until now).

DD comes home today. All classes are canceled Friday due to the debate and lack of accessibility to the campus.

Of course, by now you've heard all about the possibility of the debate being postponed. Ole Miss has spent $5 million (donations covered it) to get ready for this. The campus has been pretty close to shut down this week (quite a few teachers actually dismissed class all week due to students having to be shuttled to campus because parking lots are closed down). They've worked on this for weeks, even months. The restaurants have purchased much more food in preparation, all the hotel rooms are booked (as well as a lot of the condos). Extra staff has been hired all over town.

The last thing I heard was that the presidential debate might be moved to next week in St. Louis (instead of having the VP there), and the VP debate would take place at Ole Miss. I suspect that's going to make a lot of people very unhappy in Oxford. (personally, I'd rather see Palin anyway, but since I won't have a ticket, it won't matter to me).

Glad that the debate was actually held and that the money spent preparing for it wasn't wasted. We were driving back to Nebraska when it was on so I didn't get to see the hall itself, but the station was talking about how nice it was. Good debate as well.

Hey Sheila - congrats to Ole Miss on beating Florida on Saturday!!!

 

[Sandy V.]

Just had breakfast with DS got my fix. He's coming for dinner tonight, I bribed him with groceries, chicken alfredo tortellini and the season premier of Heroes that I have recorded
His big event this week at school.......they had a "Moon-Off" at midnight. They got as many kids as they could and had everyone assemble in the quad. The kids were in rows (I guess there were a lot of kids) at the designated time, they all dropped their drawers and mooned to the south where UNLV is Yes, ladies and gentleman this is what $21K will buy you at a Univ. these days! Oh they are also having a "Stick it to UNLV" blood drive all this week.

You all have a great day!
Go Pack - stomp some Rebel behind

ETA: It was a Moon off not a Moon In

Glad your your food bribes have worked!!! The moon off sounds hilarious!!

Congrats to the Wolfpack in their victory over UNLV!!!!

Well, DS is officially a member of Sigma Phi Epsilon. Got his bid yesterday (also got one to Kappa Sigma). I guess it was a very easy choice for him between the two. His roommate and high school friend also got the same bids and they all pledged Sig Ep. So Melissa, it looks like our sons are officially "brothers". This will be a new adventure for all of us!!!

I guess when they picked up their bid(s) choice(s) yesterday, they made all of the potential pledges stay in a large hall for an hour - I guess to avoid any sort of pressure by the fraternity members to join or reject any fraternity. When that time expired, then they filed out one by one to the awaiting fraternities and their members. As you filed out, they announced your name and what fraternity you pledged. And then the accepted fraternity's members would cheer raucously!! DS said it was a lot of fun.

Had a good time in Nebraska, barring the fact that we lost to Virginia Tech 35-30. Oh well, better luck next game!! Loved spending the time with DD. Got home mid-day and worked on house projects and the never ending pile of laundry. But I did manage to put clean sheets on the bed yesterday, so that was a good thing. Went to bed exhausted last night.

Not much else to tell. I hope that all is well with you. Happy Monday!!

 

[horseshowmom]

Well, DS is officially a member of Sigma Phi Epsilon. Got his bid yesterday (also got one to Kappa Sigma). I guess it was a very easy choice for him between the two. His roommate and high school friend also got the same bids and they all pledged Sig Ep. So Melissa, it looks like our sons are officially "brothers". This will be a new adventure for all of us!!!

First, congratulations to your son. Secondly, I wonder what the odds are that both of your sons would wind up in the same fraternity? If it makes any difference (you know, helps me fit in ), DD at least knows where the Sigma house is on campus!



Sorry about your team!

I've got to say it was a big weekend for Ole Miss. First, the debate and then the "Whoopin' in the Swamp" (as it was being referred to by Ole Miss broadcasters )!

DD said they still don't have the parking opened back up, but her pass lasts through tomorrow. Hopefully, everything will be open by Tuesday. I know it will be soon, because this weekend is Homecoming, and the alumni like to get there early to set up their motorhomes.

It looks like MIL may be backing down from the nursing home. She took him to buy a new car Saturday. SIL called us and was really perturbed. They were driving a Lincoln (roomy and they could get in and out of it). After one of the granddaughter's bought a Camry, FIL decided he wanted one too (I have no idea why he was so fixated on that particular car). Both DH and SIL have told them repeatedly that they (neither of them) can get in and out of a Camry. So what does MIL do, they go buy a new Camry.

Now, that sets up one of two scenarios: One, she does put him in the nursing home, and he goes ballistic talking about "her buying a new car" and then "putting him in a nursing home". OR Two, she doesn't put him in a nursing home, and they both have to try to get around in the Camry - absolutely will not work due to their physical ailments.

SIL is furious, and DH is very frustrated. We'll see what happens this week. He's been very abusive (verbally) the last few weeks.

An interesting situation has developed with that side of the family. DH's nephew (the one that his parents talk about constantly when DD goes over there) is getting married next Saturday.

Nobody on DH's side of the family has been invited although everybody got invitations to the shower last weekend. I mean, they didn't even invite DH's parents (this is DH's brother's child), but all of the other side of the family is going.

SIL said that when her brother came in at his mother's house the other day, she asked him how things were going with the wedding, and he just said, "Oh, weddings are women's work, I don't keep up with that." and that was it.

DD said that she really appreciates them making her look so good (her wedding won't include the entire family, but it will at least have DH's parents and siblings)!

 

[Sandy V.]

First, congratulations to your son. Secondly, I wonder what the odds are that both of your sons would wind up in the same fraternity? If it makes any difference (you know, helps me fit in ), DD at least knows where the Sigma house is on campus!

I know - who would have thought it? Glad to hear that your DD knows where the house is. (You fit it no matter what, by the way). My DD is happy for her brother because he's happy with his choice to pledge. But she has always had more guy friends than girl friends, and would have been unhappy with some of the "meat market" aspects of being required to socialize with the fraternities. Plus, she had (and still has) a steady boyfriend who wouldn't have appreciated it either.

Sorry about your team!

That's okay. I'll get by!!!

I've got to say it was a big weekend for Ole Miss. First, the debate and then the "Whoopin' in the Swamp" (as it was being referred to by Ole Miss broadcasters )!

I thought about you on Saturday night when they kept flashing the score on our board at the Nebraska game.

DD said they still don't have the parking opened back up, but her pass lasts through tomorrow. Hopefully, everything will be open by Tuesday. I know it will be soon, because this weekend is Homecoming, and the alumni like to get there early to set up their motorhomes.

Yeah, those tailgates take priority!!!

Still nothing from Vanderbilt?!?!?! I hope your DD is feeling okay.

It looks like MIL may be backing down from the nursing home. She took him to buy a new car Saturday. SIL called us and was really perturbed. They were driving a Lincoln (roomy and they could get in and out of it). After one of the granddaughter's bought a Camry, FIL decided he wanted one too (I have no idea why he was so fixated on that particular car). Both DH and SIL have told them repeatedly that they (neither of them) can get in and out of a Camry. So what does MIL do, they go buy a new Camry.

Now, that sets up one of two scenarios: One, she does put him in the nursing home, and he goes ballistic talking about "her buying a new car" and then "putting him in a nursing home". OR Two, she doesn't put him in a nursing home, and they both have to try to get around in the Camry - absolutely will not work due to their physical ailments.

SIL is furious, and DH is very frustrated. We'll see what happens this week. He's been very abusive (verbally) the last few weeks.

Looks like they're both in strong denial. I hope no one gets hurt over all of this.

We went through something similar a number of years ago with my FIL. My MIL was determined to keep him at home, even though he outweighed her by at least a hundred pounds and he couldn't move a muscle. So she (and my SIL) had to lift him into and out of bed and on and off the toilet, etc.

When he had some medical "emergency" (some legitimate, some not), they would call for an ambulance to take him to the hospital, where most times Medicaid would authorize to put him in the hospital or a nursing home for awhile to "rehabilitate". After the last nursing home stay, they got him home and had a horrible, horrible couple of days trying to take care of him. We were in Colorado, and the other siblings in Nebraska couldn't be up there night and day. Finally, MIL and SIL came to the realization that he HAD to be placed in a nursing home before their health was wrecked as well. FIL didn't like it at first, but it was a wonderful facility that took very good care of him. In the end, everyone was on the same page that it was the right decision. I hope that you manage to get everyone on the same page as well in the near future.

Your FIL sounds like a piece of work with his ideas on "his" money. Unfortunately, that was/is the attitude of many men of that generation.

An interesting situation has developed with that side of the family. DH's nephew (the one that his parents talk about constantly when DD goes over there) is getting married next Saturday.

Nobody on DH's side of the family has been invited although everybody got invitations to the shower last weekend. I mean, they didn't even invite DH's parents (this is DH's brother's child), but all of the other side of the family is going.

SIL said that when her brother came in at his mother's house the other day, she asked him how things were going with the wedding, and he just said, "Oh, weddings are women's work, I don't keep up with that." and that was it.

DD said that she really appreciates them making her look so good (her wedding won't include the entire family, but it will at least have DH's parents and siblings)!

How strange. Wonder if the grandparents will talk so fondly about the nephew after THIS?

 

[mamacatnv]

Sheila: The Wedding sounds a lot like an episode teaser I saw for BrideZilla's last week. One whole half of the family was excluded. Oh dear, and yet you all were invited to the shower
FIL - At some point the "kids" are going to have to do one of 2 things, either step in and take over (not easy to do legally) or let MIL deal with the situation she helps perpetuate. Sad all around and any way you look at it. As for the car, they bought it, they are going to have to sort themselves out.
Can you guess I am a big proponent of tough love I get worse the closer I get to "Mother" visits, so if you want me to set your poor guilt ridden DH straight, this would be a good week, I leave Thursday

Glad the debates went off and that Ole Miss is getting back to some semblance of normalacy. DS texted me today, O is going to be on his campus tomorrow. He had all sorts of "Plans" none of which were very respectful. After he yammered on about his constitutional rights for awhile I reminded him that my credit card cannot be used for bail. He then said he was going to go with his BFF an O supporter and drown out his cheers. Bottom line, he decided that he would have to get up way to early to attend and is planning on sleeping through it.
Glad to hear that Ole Miss prevailed at the game.

Sandy:
How ironic, we talk about how similar our son's are and now, they are Frat Brothers. Too funny! The "ceremony" sounds like it was a lot of fun. DS is now the anchor of the Frat's flag football team and has practice several nights a week. He is having a great time.

Sorry to hear about Nebraska, but you did get some wings and beer out of the deal

I love clean sheets, but I hate making the dang bed!

Thank you for the congrats for UNR - the Cannon is back in it's rightful home. DS's old high school was not as lucky, they got the snot kicked out of them and hung their heads all the way home without the Valley Cup Trophy! Oh well, there is always next year.

The Gala Grand Opening at Scheels was fun and very crowded! We came home with lots of little trinkets........sports bottles, pens, socks, carbiner clips, t-shirts & hats etc.......Junk The place is amazing and so big - we were there 2 hours and hardly got around the upstairs, let alone did much exploring. We ended up leaving because DD who was with a friend starting yacking (Yeah, I know, big surprise) but actually there was some sort of 24 hour stomach flu that went thru the carpool group last 2 weeks and she was the only one who hadn't had it. So, she and I were up most of the night.

Woke up Saturday and other than being a little peaked, she was good to go. Her B-Day party went forward as planned. The party was a lot of fun, the girls made their own pizza's complete with making a crust out of a dough ball, we played a couple of games, attacked a pinata and made foam book marks. They all had a blast. DD was thrilled. 3 of the "darlings" spent the night and they all sat up watching a movie. None of them made it past 11:30 so the "slumber" part of the party was a success. I didn't hear a peep until a little after 8 on Sunday, got up, made them french toast and bacon and went back to bed. I then did nothing, absolutely nothing the rest of the day until after dinner.

Last night we were running around like maniacs. We were unaware that DD had a report due this morning on the state of Texas. It had slipped thru the cracks with all her absences and all the make up work she had been doing. When we were packing her backpack last night at about 8, I flipped the page in her planner and saw the report was due today. Google is my friend! Myself, DH and DD got it done and we sent her off to bed at 10:45 and then I broke my own cardinal rule, I colored all her drawings for her. I never, ever do their work, but she was so miserable and I honestly can say we all forgot about it, so I helped her out.

Well that is my update - hope you all have a great day

 

[horseshowmom]

My DD is happy for her brother because he's happy with his choice to pledge. But she has always had more guy friends than girl friends, and would have been unhappy with some of the "meat market" aspects of being required to socialize with the fraternities. Plus, she had (and still has) a steady boyfriend who wouldn't have appreciated it either.

Quite honestly, that's my DD's perspective too. She's never been into the whole "girl/drama" type thing, and it's just not her style. I'm afraid she takes after her mother too much for that sort of thing. Like your DD, she has always had more friends that happened to be guys.

One guy in particular has been very close to her. He's a couple of years behind her, but they horseshowed together and has a sister her age. He's the one who wanted to rent the apt. this summer. He dates another good friend of hers who also showed (these horsehow kids get really close). Once he got to Ole Miss, she kind of introduced him around and made him comfortable. He's very tall and built like a football player, but he's a gentle giant! We really love him (his sister is at Miss. State).

Yeah, those tailgates take priority!!!

They definitely do at Ole Miss!

Still nothing from Vanderbilt?!?!?! I hope your DD is feeling okay.

NO! Dadgum them! She's doing okay for the most part - a little something now and then, but nothing major.

Looks like they're both in strong denial. I hope no one gets hurt over all of this.

We went through something similar a number of years ago with my FIL. My MIL was determined to keep him at home, even though he outweighed her by at least a hundred pounds and he couldn't move a muscle. So she (and my SIL) had to lift him into and out of bed and on and off the toilet, etc.

I hope that you manage to get everyone on the same page as well in the near future.

Your FIL sounds like a piece of work with his ideas on "his" money. Unfortunately, that was/is the attitude of many men of that generation.

This situation is similar to yours. SIL lives almost next door and is a nurse, so she's called upon all the time. Her husband has had some major health problems, so she's close to being overwhelmed.

We are very concerned. Found out Saturday night that he told DH's brother that if he had a knife, he'd stick it in his belly as far as he could get it and told MIL that if she didn't do whatever it was that he was going to throw his walker and knock her head off.

And he definitely thinks he is the only one who has any say in the money or anything else...

FIL - At some point the "kids" are going to have to do one of 2 things, either step in and take over (not easy to do legally) or let MIL deal with the situation she helps perpetuate.

As for the car, they bought it, they are going to have to sort themselves out.
Can you guess I am a big proponent of tough love

Honestly, DH shares your viewpoint fortunately. He'll just go back to not answering the phone unless he wants to (they can leave a message if there's something really serious). And she'll just have to deal with the car. I just don't know whether SIL can get to that point (since she's almost next door, it's harder for her to hide. )

How strange. Wonder if the grandparents will talk so fondly about the nephew after THIS?

Sheila: The Wedding sounds a lot like an episode teaser I saw for BrideZilla's last week. One whole half of the family was excluded. Oh dear, and yet you all were invited to the shower

Yeah, it really is strange. I know that we've had issues with them, but as far as I know, that family hasn't had any. The grandson has been highly exhalted to us whenever we've been in earshot. The last time we took MIL and FIL out to eat (a year or so ago), he was absoulutely all they talked about - how well he was doing in school, what he was doing, his part-time job, etc., etc., etc. - no questions to DD about what she was doing or how she was doing, but I made sure they knew by the end of the conversation...

MIL didn't get around to telling me about the shower until just before it started. For some reason, our invitation was left over there instead of being mailed to us. I certainly didn't have anything at home, so I didn't go. I mailed them a gift card on Monday.

I don't like them myself, but some things you just suck up and do. DD would be happy if only SIL came, and the others declined the invitation (she has others that she would rather have come, but some things you just have to do - like inviting grandparents and aunts/uncles).Considering the fact that both sides of the families know each other well and see each other frequently, it's not a secret that the other side is going.

Beats me...

DS texted me today, O is going to be on his campus tomorrow. He had all sorts of "Plans" none of which were very respectful. After he yammered on about his constitutional rights for awhile I reminded him that my credit card cannot be used for bail.

He then said he was going to go with his BFF an O supporter and drown out his cheers. Bottom line, he decided that he would have to get up way to early to attend and is planning on sleeping through it.

Works for me!

Sandy:
DS is now the anchor of the Frat's flag football team and has practice several nights a week. He is having a great time.

Hey, he got that college football after all, didn't he!

The Gala Grand Opening at Scheels was fun and very crowded! We came home with lots of little trinkets........sports bottles, pens, socks, carbiner clips, t-shirts & hats etc.......Junk

Hey, but it was FREE junk!

there was some sort of 24 hour stomach flu that went thru the carpool group last 2 weeks and she was the only one who hadn't had it. So, she and I were up most of the night.

Glad she's better!

Woke up Saturday and other than being a little peaked, she was good to go. Her B-Day party went forward as planned. The party was a lot of fun, the girls made their own pizza's complete with making a crust out of a dough ball, we played a couple of games, attacked a pinata and made foam book marks. They all had a blast. DD was thrilled. 3 of the "darlings" spent the night and they all sat up watching a movie. None of them made it past 11:30 so the "slumber" part of the party was a success. I didn't hear a peep until a little after 8 on Sunday, got up, made them french toast and bacon and went back to bed. I then did nothing, absolutely nothing the rest of the day until after dinner.

The party sounds like great fun! The part where they go to sleep by 11:30 makes it my favorite kind of slumber party!

Last night we were running around like maniacs. We were unaware that DD had a report due this morning on the state of Texas. It had slipped thru the cracks with all her absences and all the make up work she had been doing. When we were packing her backpack last night at about 8, I flipped the page in her planner and saw the report was due today. Google is my friend! Myself, DH and DD got it done and we sent her off to bed at 10:45 and then I broke my own cardinal rule, I colored all her drawings for her. I never, ever do their work, but she was so miserable and I honestly can say we all forgot about it, so I helped her out.

You know, as a former teacher, under her circumstances I would have completely understood. I'm just glad you found it before it was too late.

 

[mamacatnv]

Quite honestly, that's my DD's perspective too. She's never been into the whole "girl/drama" type thing, and it's just not her style. I'm afraid she takes after her mother too much for that sort of thing. Like your DD, she has always had more friends that happened to be guys.

One guy in particular has been very close to her. He's a couple of years behind her, but they horseshowed together and has a sister her age. He's the one who wanted to rent the apt. this summer. He dates another good friend of hers who also showed (these horsehow kids get really close). Once he got to Ole Miss, she kind of introduced him around and made him comfortable. He's very tall and built like a football player, but he's a gentle giant! We really love him (his sister is at Miss. State).

I think for the girls that guy friends are so much more stable. They don't compete with you, they don't trash talk and they can be very protective which I think most young woman can benefit from. I know my DD gravitates towards males and I bet she always will.

NO! Dadgum them! She's doing okay for the most part - a little something now and then, but nothing major.

Hang in there

This situation is similar to yours. SIL lives almost next door and is a nurse, so she's called upon all the time. Her husband has had some major health problems, so she's close to being overwhelmed.

My BFF has very disfunctional parents who live at the end of our street. They might as well live across the country. She lets all calls go to voice mail and then screens them (I taught her that trick when Mother was in her hayday of misbehaving ) She always comes home from the opposite direction so that she doesn't pass the house and they tend to be reclusive.

We are very concerned. Found out Saturday night that he told DH's brother that if he had a knife, he'd stick it in his belly as far as he could get it and told MIL that if she didn't do whatever it was that he was going to throw his walker and knock her head off.

And he definitely thinks he is the only one who has any say in the money or anything else...

Has anyone gotten either adult protective services or a Senior social worker involved in this mess? That could take some of the burden off of the family members?

Honestly, DH shares your viewpoint fortunately. He'll just go back to not answering the phone unless he wants to (they can leave a message if there's something really serious). And she'll just have to deal with the car. I just don't know whether SIL can get to that point (since she's almost next door, it's harder for her to hide. )

SIL has choices to make and if she chooses to continue to deal with their nonesense then that is her choice. I know, I'm mean . Sometimes families do more harm than good when they enable bad behavior. They mean well and they take on the "caregiver" role but in the long run they may not be helping matters.

Beats me...

Gotta love family

Works for me!

DS just called, the "campus is nuts"! "Wanna have breakfast Mom?" which means: Get me out of here and will you buy

Hey, he got that college football after all, didn't he!

He sure did! He also has gotten into Ultimate Frisbee and has not given up on his quest for paintball. He found a paintball club, turns out one of the heads of the club went to Kindergarten with DS way back when.

:
Hey, but it was FREE junk!

I am now the proud owner of a pen that is assembled from all recycled and organic products furnished by the Born shoe company. (I do love their shoes, the pen is funky looking) the sports bottles are from Columbia sports wear and are very nice, the socks, well, they are gray/green not sure who will wear them, they might make good dust cloths. DD does like the hat brim lights we got. She was in bed last night in her Scheels hat with the clip on light reading a book, it was kind of cute.

Glad she's better!

Thank you - she should have a good year from here, she has already gotten a years worth of bugs in the past month!

:The party sounds like great fun! The part where they go to sleep by 11:30 makes it my favorite kind of slumber party!

I was amazed they were all asleep before midnight. These are the 3 neighbor girls, they have been know to stay up all night.

:
You know, as a former teacher, under her circumstances I would have completely understood. I'm just glad you found it before it was too late.

I told her not to tell her teacher that I colored the drawings Today she has to give a presentation and she took all the different magnets we got on our trip to Texas last year to use as references. We were trying to figure out how the Schlitterbahn magnet could be used because it is "cool" looking and then she remembered - the water park uses "a water resource" they use the Comal River and she even remembered some details about the river (shortest river in the world). I was waiting for an anxiety stomach this morning, but she was fine. I honestly was surprised and off to school she went.

Hope you all have a great day

 

[horseshowmom]

I think for the girls that guy friends are so much more stable. They don't compete with you, they don't trash talk and they can be very protective which I think most young woman can benefit from. I know my DD gravitates towards males and I bet she always will.
Hang in there

I agree with every bit of that. Last year when the ex-BF was causing problems, R was right there all the time. When a group of them went out, he always picked DD up and carried her home. Most of the stuff she did, he made sure he was around and really kept a close watch out for her and texted her so often that we had to increase her phone plan! He really made me feel a lot better.

Has anyone gotten either adult protective services or a Senior social worker involved in this mess? That could take some of the burden off of the family members?

They actually have talked to the social worker at the VA, and they've told MIL all along that when she gets ready to do something they'll be ready to help her. There's that "when she gets ready" issue...

SIL has choices to make and if she chooses to continue to deal with their nonesense then that is her choice. I know, I'm mean . Sometimes families do more harm than good when they enable bad behavior. They mean well and they take on the "caregiver" role but in the long run they may not be helping matters.

DH told SIL to start letting it go to the answering machine like he does, but FIL has had so many serious accidents with broken bones and his breathing (on oxygen most of the time), that I think she's afraid to, but she's going to have to. Until MIL has to deal with it completely on her own, she won't do anything.

Of course, they have a man there from 8 - 5 M-F and 8 - 12 on Saturdays, but MIL still insists on doing it herself or calling the kids in. DH just tells her no and has for quite awhile. I think that's why this time she upped the ante (saying FIL was going to have to go to a nursing home). Once DH and SIL got involved again, she started backing back down. They're (MIL and SIL) supposed to go to the nursing home tomorrow, we'll see what happens.
Gotta love family

DS just called, the "campus is nuts"! "Wanna have breakfast Mom?" which means: Get me out of here and will you buy

I see you speak "college" fluently!

We were trying to figure out how the Schlitterbahn magnet could be used because it is "cool" looking and then she remembered - the water park uses "a water resource" they use the Comal River and she even remembered some details about the river (shortest river in the world). I was waiting for an anxiety stomach this morning, but she was fine. I honestly was surprised and off to school she went.

Very good job on her part and a good thing to work into her presentation. I'm glad to hear that the morning went smoothly. Maybe the suggestions from the psych are helping!

 

[Sandy V.]

Popping in for a brief moment to say "Hi". Work is really busy at the moment, but I will try and catch up on our thread tomorrow. All is well here, and it sounds like it's going okay for you as well, so that's good.

Glad that the Texas paper and project got done, Melissa. I would have colored myself, so I completely understand!! I have similar memories of DH and I "helping" DD make a working volcano for a 6th grade science project and being out in our yard in our pajamas at 10:30 at night to put on the finishing touches.

Sheila, I am concerned about the safety of your inlaws. The threats clearly bother me, but then again, I obviously don't know them to figure out if it's all verbal abuse, mental instability, or a true intent to follow through. Sigh . . . there are no easy answers to these questions, are there? I'm also concerned about your SIL and her health. Hang in there.

Will talk more later. Have a good day, ladies!!!

 

[horseshowmom]

Sheila, I am concerned about the safety of your inlaws. The threats clearly bother me, but then again, I obviously don't know them to figure out if it's all verbal abuse, mental instability, or a true intent to follow through. Sigh . . . there are no easy answers to these questions, are there? I'm also concerned about your SIL and her health.

I agree. We've said the same thing. DH says that while FIL may be frail, given the right opportunity, he very well might hurt MIL. FIL stays on the phone all the time, and I have no doubt that a thrown cell phone could hurt somebody if it hit just right (particularly someone as frail as she is).

SIL actually went to part-time work because of her own health and now she has all of this. She told her mother that they are going to the nursing home tomorrow for information and they are NOT taking her dad with them (so he won't be an interruption and distraction). MIL said that if he does eventually go, she's not taking him herself, so who knows what will happen. DH says he has doubts that it will happen until his dad really does hurt her. She has FIL's power of attorney, so she makes the decisions (like with the car ).


On a brighter note, I just bought airplane tickets to go to Florida at Christmas. DD and I are going to see my parents. We had to change our planned dates because SIL's DD is getting married 12/20 (found out before I bought the tickets fortunately). We were planning on going 12/17-12/24, and I had an intermediate car for $104. Now we're going 12/25-12/30, and the car rates are $400-$500! My parents are happy to pick us up, and if those rates don't get better, that's what we'll do. I'm going to keep checking. I've used last minute rates a lot of times and done well, so I'm crossing my fingers!

Have a good day!

 

[horseshowmom]

Hey, Melissa, I speak "college" too! I got an email from DD with a link to a $40 hair comb for her wedding. She asked what I thought, I emailed back and told her it was pretty. She emailed back and said that if I liked it, she guessed she'd go ahead and order it - meaning, "Hey, mom, I really like this comb and since you do too, I'm assuming that means you're going to pay for it, so I'll go ahead and order it for you" (she's such a helpful child ).

 

[Sandy V.]

DS texted me today, O is going to be on his campus tomorrow. He had all sorts of "Plans" none of which were very respectful. After he yammered on about his constitutional rights for awhile I reminded him that my credit card cannot be used for bail. He then said he was going to go with his BFF an O supporter and drown out his cheers. Bottom line, he decided that he would have to get up way to early to attend and is planning on sleeping through it.
Glad to hear that Ole Miss prevailed at the game.

So how did the Obama event go? Michelle Obama is going to be at CU today. I texted my kids to let them know, but with their schedules and midterms, I doubt if they attend the event.

Sandy:
How ironic, we talk about how similar our son's are and now, they are Frat Brothers. Too funny! The "ceremony" sounds like it was a lot of fun. DS is now the anchor of the Frat's flag football team and has practice several nights a week. He is having a great time.

It is too funny. Since this coming Saturday is homecoming, DS will be helping put together a float for the parade with the fraternity and the sorority next door. He also told me about their intramural squads, although I don't know if time will allow him to play just yet.

Sorry to hear about Nebraska, but you did get some wings and beer out of the deal

That's okay, and YES!! I did get wings and beer, so all is well with the world.

I love clean sheets, but I hate making the dang bed!

Yeah, not my favorite thing either, but ya gotta do what ya gotta do.

Thank you for the congrats for UNR - the Cannon is back in it's rightful home. DS's old high school was not as lucky, they got the snot kicked out of them and hung their heads all the way home without the Valley Cup Trophy! Oh well, there is always next year.

Congratulations and condolences.

The Gala Grand Opening at Scheels was fun and very crowded! We came home with lots of little trinkets........sports bottles, pens, socks, carbiner clips, t-shirts & hats etc.......Junk The place is amazing and so big - we were there 2 hours and hardly got around the upstairs, let alone did much exploring. We ended up leaving because DD who was with a friend starting yacking (Yeah, I know, big surprise) but actually there was some sort of 24 hour stomach flu that went thru the carpool group last 2 weeks and she was the only one who hadn't had it. So, she and I were up most of the night.

Sounds like quite the event, and you made out with quite the haul. Sorry to hear that your DD got sick, but it sounds like she's okay now.

Woke up Saturday and other than being a little peaked, she was good to go. Her B-Day party went forward as planned. The party was a lot of fun, the girls made their own pizza's complete with making a crust out of a dough ball, we played a couple of games, attacked a pinata and made foam book marks. They all had a blast. DD was thrilled. 3 of the "darlings" spent the night and they all sat up watching a movie. None of them made it past 11:30 so the "slumber" part of the party was a success. I didn't hear a peep until a little after 8 on Sunday, got up, made them french toast and bacon and went back to bed. I then did nothing, absolutely nothing the rest of the day until after dinner.

I love it when a plan comes together and the kids fall asleep earlier!!!

Last night we were running around like maniacs. We were unaware that DD had a report due this morning on the state of Texas. It had slipped thru the cracks with all her absences and all the make up work she had been doing. When we were packing her backpack last night at about 8, I flipped the page in her planner and saw the report was due today. Google is my friend! Myself, DH and DD got it done and we sent her off to bed at 10:45 and then I broke my own cardinal rule, I colored all her drawings for her. I never, ever do their work, but she was so miserable and I honestly can say we all forgot about it, so I helped her out.

Like I said, I would have done exactly the same thing if I was in your position. Those last-minute projects always seem to be the ones we remember most. Sounds like she did a great job on her presentation!!!

 

[Sandy V.]

Quite honestly, that's my DD's perspective too. She's never been into the whole "girl/drama" type thing, and it's just not her style. I'm afraid she takes after her mother too much for that sort of thing. Like your DD, she has always had more friends that happened to be guys.

One guy in particular has been very close to her. He's a couple of years behind her, but they horseshowed together and has a sister her age. He's the one who wanted to rent the apt. this summer. He dates another good friend of hers who also showed (these horsehow kids get really close). Once he got to Ole Miss, she kind of introduced him around and made him comfortable. He's very tall and built like a football player, but he's a gentle giant! We really love him (his sister is at Miss. State).

Yes, I agree with both of you. The "drama" is must more than DD wants to take on. Fortunately for her, she has some great girlfriends who are just not into that, and are loyal and friendly. So that helps.

They definitely do at Ole Miss!

Heck, I think as long as there's a game to be played and good weather and friends to gather, tailgating is big EVERYWHERE!!

NO! Dadgum them! She's doing okay for the most part - a little something now and then, but nothing major.

Sorry to hear that. It's hard to be patient in this situation when it's your child's health.

Yeah, it really is strange. I know that we've had issues with them, but as far as I know, that family hasn't had any. The grandson has been highly exhalted to us whenever we've been in earshot. The last time we took MIL and FIL out to eat (a year or so ago), he was absoulutely all they talked about - how well he was doing in school, what he was doing, his part-time job, etc., etc., etc. - no questions to DD about what she was doing or how she was doing, but I made sure they knew by the end of the conversation...

MIL didn't get around to telling me about the shower until just before it started. For some reason, our invitation was left over there instead of being mailed to us. I certainly didn't have anything at home, so I didn't go. I mailed them a gift card on Monday.

I don't like them myself, but some things you just suck up and do. DD would be happy if only SIL came, and the others declined the invitation (she has others that she would rather have come, but some things you just have to do - like inviting grandparents and aunts/uncles).Considering the fact that both sides of the families know each other well and see each other frequently, it's not a secret that the other side is going.

Beats me...

I can't wait to hear what your inlaws have to say about all of this AFTER the event. They have to be hurt or mad, even if they're silent about it now. Plus, they've got bigger concerns at the moment with your FIL's behavior and all of the enabling . . .

 

[Sandy V.]

I DS just called, the "campus is nuts"! "Wanna have breakfast Mom?" which means: Get me out of here and will you buy
He sure did! He also has gotten into Ultimate Frisbee and has not given up on his quest for paintball. He found a paintball club, turns out one of the heads of the club went to Kindergarten with DS way back when.

That "collegespeak" can really add up, $$$ wise!!

Football, ultimate frisbee, AND paintball?!!? Looks like your DS just hit the trifecta. Glad he's doing well and seems happy.

By the way, whatever happen to the "water bottle wars" between him and his roommate? Enquiring minds want to know . . .

 

[Sandy V.]

On a brighter note, I just bought airplane tickets to go to Florida at Christmas. DD and I are going to see my parents. We had to change our planned dates because SIL's DD is getting married 12/20 (found out before I bought the tickets fortunately). We were planning on going 12/17-12/24, and I had an intermediate car for $104. Now we're going 12/25-12/30, and the car rates are $400-$500! My parents are happy to pick us up, and if those rates don't get better, that's what we'll do. I'm going to keep checking. I've used last minute rates a lot of times and done well, so I'm crossing my fingers!

What a fun trip for you and your family!! I'm jealous, but happy for you. Yeah, it sounds like the car rental rates are nuts for that time of year. Are you planning on making a stop at Universal/IOA or WDW?

Hey, Melissa, I speak "college" too! I got an email from DD with a link to a $40 hair comb for her wedding. She asked what I thought, I emailed back and told her it was pretty. She emailed back and said that if I liked it, she guessed she'd go ahead and order it - meaning, "Hey, mom, I really like this comb and since you do too, I'm assuming that means you're going to pay for it, so I'll go ahead and order it for you" (she's such a helpful child ).

Yeah, they're pretty good with this "collegespeak" stuff. I am assuming that the wedding stuff is going well, you haven't mentioned much about it lately.

Also, what's up with Superintendent? Hopefully he's not causing you any stress!! I always look forward to hearing about his latest blunder . . .

 

[horseshowmom]

Yes, I agree with both of you. The "drama" is must more than DD wants to take on. Fortunately for her, she has some great girlfriends who are just not into that, and are loyal and friendly. So that helps.

DD's best friend is like her (no drama), and they get along really well. We'd adopt the girl if we could, she's a sweetie. She and DD are polar opposites in looks though. DD is tall, brunette, brown eyes, slim, and BFF is short, blonde, blue eyes and more filled out. She absolutely does not have luck finding a nice guy to date. She's dated very little, and it's a real shame. She gets really perturbed from time to time and says that she knows there have to be some nice guys left, but she can't find one! They don't know what they're missing.

I can't wait to hear what your inlaws have to say about all of this AFTER the event. They have to be hurt or mad, even if they're silent about it now. Plus, they've got bigger concerns at the moment with your FIL's behavior and all of the enabling . . .

Well, I know they're pretty annoyed. FIL has said quite a bit about it (of course, he says quite a bit about everything ). MIL told DH (when she called about the shower about 30 minutes before time for it to start) that she didn't know if she was going (and she didn't).

I've got to tell you, it takes a lot of nerve to carry shower invitations to your grandmother's house and not invite her to the wedding. It's hard for me to have much sympathy for them due to the circumstances that we've dealt with, but I would NEVER behave that badly even if it were my worst enemy. I don't understand how anybody could be that clueless.

By the way, whatever happen to the "water bottle wars" between him and his roommate? Enquiring minds want to know . . .

Yeah, I've been wondering about that too!

I am assuming that the wedding stuff is going well, you haven't mentioned much about it lately.

Wedding stuff is proceeding well. DD decided that she wanted to do fat pretzel sticks dipped in white chocolate as favors. They'll have green drizzled on them to match the BM dresses and be tied up in cellophane bags with matching green ribbon. They'll also have labels with their monogram and wedding date.

DD had in mind to do them ourselves over Christmas, and I told her that I thought that was way too far ahead of time. Somebody she had talked to had told her that they would be fine, but I didn't want to take a chance. I talked to someone that I've used for catering before, and they said they could do it (and I know they'll turn out well that way).

Also, what's up with Superintendent? Hopefully he's not causing you any stress!! I always look forward to hearing about his latest blunder . . .

I know you're probably going to be shocked, but he hasn't been around to see me since our discussion about the phone...


I've got to add that I have wound up really enjoying this job. I go home every day at 3:15 and nver work over. The kids absolutely shower me with affection (hugs, pictures, notes). It really is a lot less work than I used to do. Other than just being ticked off over the principle of the thing, I really am satisfied. I still get requests from teachers that sometimes I can help with and sometimes I can't (which I really hate - had one just this morning), but overall, I'm well satisfied. While I may not be "in charge" anymore, I also don't have those headaches either.

 

[Sandy V.]

DD's best friend is like her (no drama), and they get along really well. We'd adopt the girl if we could, she's a sweetie. She and DD are polar opposites in looks though. DD is tall, brunette, brown eyes, slim, and BFF is short, blonde, blue eyes and more filled out. She absolutely does not have luck finding a nice guy to date. She's date very little, and it's a real shame. She gets really perturbed from time to time and says that she knows there have to be some nice guys left, but she can't find one! They don't know what they're missing.

It's nice that your DD has such a good friend, and there will be nice guys in her future. Sometimes it takes a while for the bad ones to sift out.

Well, I know they're pretty annoyed. FIL has said quite a bit about it (of course, he says quite a bit about everything ). MIL told DH (when she called about the shower about 30 minutes before time for it to start) that she didn't know if she was going (and she didn't).

I've got to tell you, it takes a lot of nerve to carry shower invitations to your grandmother's house and not invite her to the wedding. It's hard for me to have much sympathy for them due to the circumstances that we've dealt with, but I would NEVER behave that badly even if it were my worst enemy. I don't understand how anybody could be that clueless.

Yeah, that really is the height of rudeness.

Wedding stuff is proceeding well. DD decided that she wanted to do fat pretzel sticks dipped in white chocolate as favors. They'll have green drizzled on them to match the BM dresses and be tied up in cellophane bags with matching green ribbon. They'll also have labels with their monogram and wedding date.

DD had in mind to do them ourselves over Christmas, and I told her that I thought that was way too far ahead of time. Somebody she had talked to had told her that they would be fine, but I didn't want to take a chance. I talked to someone that I've used for catering before, and they said they could do it (and I know they'll turn out well that way).

I have to say that I agree with you. 5 or 6 month old pretzel sticks dipped in white chocolate, no matter how well made, just aren't going to taste fresh if they're made that far ahead of time. I think you have the right answer to the situation.

Glad to hear everything else is going well.

I know you're probably going to be shocked, but he hasn't been around to see me since our discussion about the phone...

I am shocked, just SHOCKED!!!

 

[mamacatnv]

Okay - quick - I have a lot to do. I am out of here tomorrow morning and won't be back until Tuesday. I need to get out of here on time and get to the Discount Liquor Store my Auntie needs provisions and the booze here is much cheaper and can be bought at all hours, unlike Oregon that has state controlled liquor stores. I have nails at 6 and DS is coming home for dinner and to watch Heroes. He actually is coming home and COOKING dinner since I will be at the nail salon! He is making spaghetti.

Lets see.........

Water Bottles - well DS put a large clearly worded post it note on the fridge: DO NOT DRINK MY WATER
DO NOT CHANGE MY INITIALS TO YOURS

Nothing was ever said, but his water has not been molested since and no foreign underwear have crossed the invisible line to DS's side of the room. Now the issue is the room temp. Remember that roomie moved his bed in front of the window before DS ever arrived. DS runs hot, and I mean hot. He sleeps with a fan blowing on him and his window open year round (so do I and so does DD, DH has an extra down blankie on his side of the bed )
Now that the nights are getting cold, DS is in heaven and his roomie is cold. Roomie keeps trying to close the window and DS just opens it again. Yesterday, DS jamed the window so that roomie couldn't close it.
DS's response ""you moved your bed in front of the window, deal with it or give up the window" DS also runs his fan on high (pretty loud) he says that roomie complains about it and DS's response is the same as the open window Told you he was a brat!
DS said he might propose they bunk their beds or switch locations since DS loves the cold and the roomie does not.

Frat:
DS decided to turn it down. Although the President has told him that the offer stays on the table and he can come back at any time. He says he doesn't have the time between school work, PT job, girly and Ultimate Frisbee(which he loves) he also feels that the fee's are too high. He feels that the fee's cover their party expenses more than anything else and since he doesn't party he feels like he would not be getting his moneys worth (the boy is frugal with HIS pennies). He also said that he does like the socializing but he is burnt out on socializing with drunk people all the time and that $125 a month just to play flag football is way too steep.

Chocolate dipped pretzels - those sound really pretty and I agree that 6 months ahead of time might make them stale. However, does anyone actually eat the favors

Sheila:
Tell your DD's friend, I've got a nice big handsome boy who needs a change of girly scenery! He just doesn't know it
Your Christmas trip sounds like fun, where are your parents in FL?. Keep an eye on those car rates, they fluctuate all the time and I have no doubt you will score some type of deal!
We always fly into FL. on Christmas Day. Also, put in a whole week for the rental period instead of 5 days, sometimes that helps. The Southwest Airlines web site is sometimes a good place to score rental car deals.
I am so glad you are liking your job and have settled in. Does not surprise me that Idiot has been scarce

So, did you buy the hair clip

Sandy:
Obama was here and DS bailed out of campus and called me to go have breakfast with him. He said they received several emails from campus security the night before with all the do's and don'ts listed. He was bent out of shape that the quad was off limits the night before since that is where they play ultimate frisbee!
Sounds like your DS is having a blast! I shudder to think of the floats that Frats come up with!
Good luck with HomeComing, are you going to go?

Glad all is well in your worlds. Take care, I gotta run

 

[Sandy V.]

Okay - quick - I have a lot to do. I am out of here tomorrow morning and won't be back until Tuesday. I need to get out of here on time and get to the Discount Liquor Store my Auntie needs provisions and the booze here is much cheaper and can be bought at all hours, unlike Oregon that has state controlled liquor stores. I have nails at 6 and DS is coming home for dinner and to watch Heroes. He actually is coming home and COOKING dinner since I will be at the nail salon! He is making spaghetti.

Lets see.........

Water Bottles - well DS put a large clearly worded post it note on the fridge: DO NOT DRINK MY WATER
DO NOT CHANGE MY INITIALS TO YOURS

Nothing was ever said, but his water has not been molested since and no foreign underwear have crossed the invisible line to DS's side of the room. Now the issue is the room temp. Remember that roomie moved his bed in front of the window before DS ever arrived. DS runs hot, and I mean hot. He sleeps with a fan blowing on him and his window open year round (so do I and so does DD, DH has an extra down blankie on his side of the bed )
Now that the nights are getting cold, DS is in heaven and his roomie is cold. Roomie keeps trying to close the window and DS just opens it again. Yesterday, DS jamed the window so that roomie couldn't close it.
DS's response ""you moved your bed in front of the window, deal with it or give up the window" DS also runs his fan on high (pretty loud) he says that roomie complains about it and DS's response is the same as the open window Told you he was a brat!
DS said he might propose they bunk their beds or switch locations since DS loves the cold and the roomie does not.

Frat:
DS decided to turn it down. Although the President has told him that the offer stays on the table and he can come back at any time. He says he doesn't have the time between school work, PT job, girly and Ultimate Frisbee(which he loves) he also feels that the fee's are too high. He feels that the fee's cover their party expenses more than anything else and since he doesn't party he feels like he would not be getting his moneys worth (the boy is frugal with HIS pennies). He also said that he does like the socializing but he is burnt out on socializing with drunk people all the time and that $125 a month just to play flag football is way too steep.

Chocolate dipped pretzels - those sound really pretty and I agree that 6 months ahead of time might make them stale. However, does anyone actually eat the favors

Sheila:
Tell your DD's friend, I've got a nice big handsome boy who needs a change of girly scenery! He just doesn't know it
Your Christmas trip sounds like fun, where are your parents in FL?. Keep an eye on those car rates, they fluctuate all the time and I have no doubt you will score some type of deal!
We always fly into FL. on Christmas Day. Also, put in a whole week for the rental period instead of 5 days, sometimes that helps. The Southwest Airlines web site is sometimes a good place to score rental car deals.
I am so glad you are liking your job and have settled in. Does not surprise me that Idiot has been scarce

So, did you buy the hair clip

Sandy:
Obama was here and DS bailed out of campus and called me to go have breakfast with him. He said they received several emails from campus security the night before with all the do's and don'ts listed. He was bent out of shape that the quad was off limits the night before since that is where they play ultimate frisbee!
Sounds like your DS is having a blast! I shudder to think of the floats that Frats come up with!
Good luck with HomeComing, are you going to go?

Glad all is well in your worlds. Take care, I gotta run

Have a safe trip, and a great time (well, as great as you can in a visit with our mother).

Glad to hear your DS is "winning" the roommate wars. Loved the post it. And now there's a new battleground - Window Wars!!!

I'm jealous about the nails - I haven't had mine done in months and I pulled the acyrillics off a while ago.

I understand about the fraternity - school comes first. So how much of a role did Girlyfriend play in convincing him not to pledge?

Take care!!

 

[mamacatnv]

Have a safe trip, and a great time (well, as great as you can in a visit with our mother).

Glad to hear your DS is "winning" the roommate wars. Loved the post it. And now there's a new battleground - Window Wars!!!

I'm jealous about the nails - I haven't had mine done in months and I pulled the acyrillics off a while ago.

I understand about the fraternity - school comes first. So how much of a role did Girlyfriend play in convincing him not to pledge?
Take care!!

DH and I discussed that last night. I am sure that girly played into it quite a bit but also knowing DS the whole party scene is not his thing. He loves the athletics (flag football, ping pong etc.) but just hanging out doesn't suit him. He is extremely active and likes to hang out with and do active things with his "teammates". Thus the draw to the Ultimate Frisbee and PaintBall. He is going to get onto the intramural flag football team.

Window Wars - that is a good one - I'll have to remember that. I see it as DS is as big of a brat as his roomie just in different ways. DS did say the kids from Vegas (the majority of his floor mates) are freezing! They don't like to hang out in his room because they are too cold! DS says he can't wait for real winter to hit and to see how the "Vegas sissy's" hold up. Also a kid on his floor from Hawaii........DS might suggest that roomie go sleep with them

I still have gel nails but am contemplating taking them off.

Just checked the weather - yesterday Portland was 89 and sunny - supposed to start raining tomorrow, drop into the 50's & 60's and drizzle the whole time I am there. It always rains when I am there.
Oregonians don't tan, they rust