Laws regarding public breastfeeding

[mindygirl5238]

I get what you're saying. I think it's coming off that my examples offended me, and they didn't. But I definitely couldn't wrap my head around them.

And in the grand scheme of life, they're a drop in the bucket. The only reason I'm even discussing them is a) there's a thread and b) someone asked directly.

Ha ha ha....ditto.

 

[Teresa Pitman]

The trouble with "any reasonable person can tell the difference" is that we all think we are reasonable. And yet (as this thread shows) people disagree about what is reasonable.

That's why we have (and need) laws to clarify that in fact, it is acceptable for mothers to breastfeed in public even when her breast is exposed as part of the process.

 

[aaarcher86]

We must be reading Gay days threads.
So, this is not "loaded question"that is crap (nice by the way!),

So you are suggesting the DIs community is against holding hands and does NOT negative react to a family concerned with seeing that when inquiring on the DIS?

I can't really make heads or tails of your question.

The DIS is against holding hands? No... I really have no idea where you're getting these ideas from. I didn't say that.

 

[aaarcher86]

The trouble with "any reasonable person can tell the difference" is that we all think we are reasonable. And yet (as this thread shows) people disagree about what is reasonable.

That's why we have (and need) laws to clarify that in fact, it is acceptable for mothers to breastfeed in public even when her breast is exposed as part of the process.

Maybe I just know too many reasonable people. I'd think for the majority, these things don't need clarification. It's for the few unreasonable folks, more extreme folks, that we need these clarifications.

And sure, I'm sure people who are on the extreme end don't find themselves to be that way.

 

[perditax]

Then perhaps a business that caters to moms and babies should have actually checked the law before they made illegal statements online.

They invited the backlash by not being informed. I don't feel sorry for them at all.

Really, even if you do get a glimpse of a nipple, which is very rare, it is just a nipple. You see them on every guy on the beach. And some guys have those nipples on bigger breasts than some women. It really is just a body part.

This country really needs to move out of the puritan age.

I guess I just feel that a virtual lynch mob isn't the way to enforce justice, or to educate the 'uninformed'. But it makes people feel good, so it's unlikely to stop.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

I can't really make heads or tails of your question.

The DIS is against holding hands? No... I really have no idea where you're getting these ideas from. I didn't say that.

Okay--the point of bringing it up is that ALL arguments presented for why a breastfeeding mother should be keeping it discrete are appropriately shot down.

My reason for comparing it is that people have the SAME reaction when they don't like to see any evidence that a two people of the same gender may be a couple. (With me so far?)

They have "no problems" with gay couples, they just don't want to "see" the gay expresses in a manner that is not discrete. Be a couple--just don't let me see it. Get it?

And all that would be shot down with a grenade with the behavior that you are calling obnoxious and others are calling militant. It doesn't affect you in any way, so what they do is their business.

Now--same deal on nursing. You have cited two extreme examples. I am merely pointing out that discretion is an ambiguous term. What YOU find discrete, others may not. What YOU define as NOT flashy (the linked photos) others may not and begin clutching their pearls.

But words and phrases (just listing, you didn't necessarily say any or all of them) such as: flaunt, showboat, letting it hang out, peep show, so is peeing and pooping and sex (in response to it is natural) don't serve any purpose other than tO provide fuel to the rhetoric. Those phrases don't contribute to a middle ground. They contribute for a lynching.

And while I am NOT denying there are extreme situations, using those as examples also inflame as they are very much NOT the norm.

And in the end--whether a mom breastfeeds in public or not has no impact on you (general) directly. Any impact is solely within your own control. You can choose to just get over it, or you can choose to gnash your teeth about consideration and discretion. But be prepared to be called on it.

So no, I am not out in left field.

If you did that for a gay couple, you would rightly be called a homophobe.

But be used it is a breast--high five sister. It's all about being polite.

That is crap.

 

[ronandannette]

So breastfeeding is tantamount to making out aggressively? Dry humping?

And you don't understand why folks would take exception with that?

And the difference? You compare it to sexual acts and foreplay. Yeah, I can see how they are one and the same.

You realize YOURE the one that used kissing and such as a comparison?

Not sure what my second was? The JOKE about porn?

We must be reading Gay days threads.
So, this is not "loaded question"that is crap (nice by the way!),

So you are suggesting the DIs community is against holding hands and does NOT negative react to a family concerned with seeing that when inquiring on the DIS?

Lisa, YOU set up the straw-man and aaarcher knocked it down. Physical displays between same-sex couples has absolutely NOTHING to do with this discussion. The analogy you keep trying to draw is not an apt one and your persistence in it is tiresome. aaarcher - stop taking the bait. We all get that you're not implying breast feeding is a sexual act.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

I guess I just feel that a virtual lynch mob isn't the way to enforce justice, or to educate the 'uninformed'. But it makes people feel good, so it's unlikely to stop.

I don't like lynch mob mentality. But to avoid being on the receiving end, not breaking the law is a start.

And sometimes, that mentality is the only way to assure that someone else's rights won't be violated.

I didn't see the posts, but it angers people when a business stands their ground in violation of the law. The only correct response is a profuse apology.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

Lisa, YOU set up the straw-man and aaarcher knocked it down. Physical displays between same-sex couples has absolutely NOTHING to do with this discussion. The analogy you keep trying to draw is not an apt one and your persistence in it is tiresome. aaarcher - stop taking the bait. We all get that you're not implying breast feeding is a sexual act.

Feel free to stop reading my posts then.
But the analogy is a correct one. Just because something makes you uncomfortable, does not justify your contempt for it whatever degree that may be.

 

[aaarcher86]

Okay--the point of bringing it up is that ALL arguments presented for why a breastfeeding mother should be keeping it discrete are appropriately shot down.

My reason for comparing it is that people have the SAME reaction when they don't like to see any evidence that a two people of the same gender may be a couple. (With me so far?)

They have "no problems" with gay couples, they just don't want to "see" the gay expresses in a manner that is not discrete. Be a couple--just don't let me see it. Get it?

And all that would be shot down with a grenade with the behavior that you are calling obnoxious and others are calling militant. It doesn't affect you in any way, so what they do is their business.

Now--same deal on nursing. You have cited two extreme examples. I am merely pointing out that discretion is an ambiguous term. What YOU find discrete, others may not. What YOU define as NOT flashy (the linked photos) others may not and begin clutching their pearls.

But words and phrases (just listing, you didn't necessarily say any or all of them) such as: flaunt, showboat, letting it hang out, peep show, so is peeing and pooping and sex (in response to it is natural) don't serve any purpose other than tO provide fuel to the rhetoric. Those phrases don't contribute to a middle ground. They contribute for a lynching.

And while I am NOT denying there are extreme situations, using those as examples also inflame as they are very much NOT the norm.

And in the end--whether a mom breastfeeds in public or not has no impact on you (general) directly. Any impact is solely within your own control. You can choose to just get over it, or you can choose to gnash your teeth about consideration and discretion. But be prepared to be called on it.

So no, I am not out in left field.

If you did that for a gay couple, you would rightly be called a homophobe.

But be used it is a breast--high five sister. It's all about being polite.

That is crap.

I honestly can't keep responding to you. You're genuinely not being logical.

Your comparisons, as pointed out by third parties are inadequate to the discussion. You just keep going around with the same ideas that didn't work the first time you posted them.

 

[ronandannette]

Feel free to stop reading my posts then.
But the analogy is a correct one. Just because something makes you uncomfortable, does not justify your contempt for it whatever degree that may be.

People "have contempt" for whatever they have contempt for, for myriad reasons. No justification is necessary as long as they don't try to interfere with those activities (presuming they are lawful). Thought-policing is not actually a "thing".

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

People "have contempt" for whatever they have contempt for, for myriad reasons. No justification is necessary as long as they don't try to interfere with those activities (presuming they are lawful). Thought-policing is not actually a "thing".

In that case, I agree.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

I think it's applicable here

I am an extreme breastfeeder?

 

[aristocatz]

My bolded - Umm WHY? She apologized & the policy was never instituted so why lawsuits? RIDICULOUS! People wonder why we have a litigious society, even when you get what you want or is right - still sue

Don't know why-just stating what I read. I'm guessing they will state their actions were considered lewd by the manager? I"m just guessing. Here is the state law:
https://malegislature.gov/Laws/GeneralLaws/PartI/TitleXVI/Chapter111/Section221

 

[MickeySP]

Don't know why-just stating what I read. I'm guessing they will state their actions were considered lewd by the manager? I"m just guessing. Here is the state law:
https://malegislature.gov/Laws/GeneralLaws/PartI/TitleXVI/Chapter111/Section221

Sorry if you thought I was implying you agreed with that I wasn't.

Just saying they got what they wanted the woman now knows the law she's correcting the situation what more could they want?
Lawsuit is ridiculous this is what happens when snowflakes grow up

 

[LBIJim]

I can't quite figure out the new way to do quotes. But I am curious as to how the person above could tell that the breastfeeding mother "was disappointed that people WEREN'T staring or paying her any attention." Do you have some mind-reading ability? I just can't see how you could possibly know what she was thinking.

And also, in reference to breasts and nipples being private parts that should not be shown, when the cases here went to court one of the arguments made was that this is discriminatory. Men and women both have nipples. At that time, men were allowed to have their nipples exposed in public but women were not. That was declared by the courts to be unfair and discriminatory against women.

The woman at the mall was making a show of it. Both breasts fully exposed. She stood up a few times and turned around. While sitting, her head was constantly turning from side to side to see if anyone was looking. Her expression changed from a neutral one to a frown or even a pout. Our eyes met a few times, and I would describe her expression as "challenging." It doesn't take a mind reader to tell she was peeved about the lack of reaction from other people. Part of her goal was accomplished; people noticed, but quickly looked away and walked on.

This woman didn't bother me at all. Her performance was rather amusing. But we left before the Grand Finale. Maybe she got her wish and someone confronted her.



To quote, look down at the bottom right of the post. You'll see a number, Like, Quote, and Reply. To respond immediately to a post, hit Reply. A new box will open with the post text already included. Add your response and hit Post Reply.

If you'd like to continue reading before replying, hit Quote. Then you can read the remaining posts in the thread before replying. You can hit Quote again to respond to other posts all in one reply. When ready to respond, hit the normal Reply bottom at bottom of screen. Then hit Insert Quotes on the reply box that appears.

 

[aristocatz]

Sorry if you thought I was implying you agreed with that I wasn't.

Just saying they got what they wanted the woman now knows the law she's correcting the situation what more could they want?
Lawsuit is ridiculous this is what happens when snowflakes grow up

I do agree that lawsuits are ridiculous in this case. As mentioned though, I live in a very liberal area with many people that are loudly protesting one thing or another. This is why I would not be surprised if I saw lawsuits filed in follow-up news articles. Doesn't mean they will win-anyone can try to file a suit for one thing or another.

I guess my opinion, with regards to this very specific case, is this is a childrens' play space. It's not a restaurant or shopping mall or beach. Their only clientele are going to be young children, moms & dads, grandparents, etc.... & most of the actions going on there are going to be baby & toddler related activities-kids & babies playing, noses being wiped, kids getting sick, diapers being changed (hopefully in the bathroom), baby food, bottle, & breast feeding, etc...Even the parents who are offended by the most extreme & non-discrete breastfeeder should be able to turn a blind eye in a situation like this unless there was a mommy there who was flashing her breasts in the ballpit & arguing with other moms about it just to gain a reaction or prove a point.

 

[cjbcam]

I guess I don't get it. In most states, I gather from reading this thread, women can legally go topless so how is this even an issue? Why should women be ashamed of their breasts when men can walk around topless?
I always hid away feeding my kids like it is something shameful. I love seeing women breastfeeding in public because I think they are brave to do so. So many people judging you for doing something good. Just look at this thread.
I guess I just think that a breast isn't that big of deal.

 

[Hrhpd]

I do agree that kneading a breast is not breastfeeding and would seem to be an extreme behavior, one that should not be done in public. I also agree a public sit-in in a place like Target is ridiculous. There are better ways to make a point than make a bunch of people think you are a crazy radical.

However, I strongly disagree with several posters here that said "be courteous, just cover-up." There is absolutely no need to cover up to feed a baby. All those pictures in the link above show a woman feeding their baby and none of them were covered up. And none were disrespectful or immodest.

I also strongly disagree with other posters that say you need to leave, such as the church example and go to a private place to breast feed. I would think standing up in a church service and leaving the sanctuary would be way more disruptive than just feeding your baby right there. I loved the 19th century picture of the moms openly breastfeeding in church.

If you (general you) are so bothered by a mother feeding her baby uncovered in a restaurant (and not in a booth), on the bus next to you or anywhere you personally deem not appropriate, then that is your (general your) problem. Look away, move away or even leave. But you (general you) have no business deciding what is and what is not appropriate for the other mother as long as she is within the law. And public breastfeeding is legally allowed, uncovered.

The rude person would be the one ogling the mom, giving the stink eye, or generally making a breast feeding mother feel uncomfortable doing what she is legally allowed to do in public.

And just for the record, I am as far from a militant breast feeder as can be as I bottle fed.

 

[Planogirl]

The problem is a lack of respect. Neither side respects the other when it would be so simple to just be discreet and in turn respect those who are discreet. And I don't mean cover up. I know that one can be discreet without covering up if you have any sense.

ETA: Wow, this thread really went off the rails. Wishing for polite behavior isn't banning anything and what that has to do with PDA's is beyond me. We can all wish that people would be quieter or that people didn't have BO or whatever. There are zillions of things that people do to be courteous (or not) to others. That doesn't mean that these things are laws.