Someone just sent this to me in an email and I wanted to share it with you guys. Hope you don't think it's too long.
FORREST GUMP GOES TO HEAVEN
The day finally arrived. Forrest Gump dies and goes to Heaven.
He is at the Pearly Gates, met by St. Peter himself. However, the gates
are
closed, and Forrest approaches the gatekeeper.
St. Peter said, "Well, Forrest, it is certainly good to see you.
We have heard a lot about you. I must tell you, though, that the place
is
filling up fast, and we have been administering an entrance examination
for
everyone. The test is short, but you have to pass it before you can get
into Heaven."
Forrest responds, "It sure is good to be here, St. Peter, sir. But
nobody
ever told me about any entrance exam. I sure hope that the test ain't
too
hard. Life was a big enough test as it was."
St. Peter continued, "Yes, I know, Forrest, but the test is only
three questions.
First: What two days of the week begin with the letter T?
Second: How many seconds are there in a year?
Third: What is God's first name?"
Forrest leaves to think the questions over. He returns the next day and
sees St. Peter, who waves him up, and says, "Now that you
have had a chance to think the questions over, tell me your answers."
Forrest replied, "Well, the first one -- which two days in the week
begins
with the letter "T"? Shucks, that one is easy. That would be Today and
Tomorrow."
The Saint's eyes opened wide and he exclaimed, "Forrest, that is
not what I was thinking, but you do have a point, and I guess I did not
specify, so I will give you credit for that answer. How about the next
one?" asked St. Peter.
"How many seconds in a year? Now that one is harder," replied
Forrest, but I thunk and thunk about that, and I guess the only answer
can
be twelve."
Astounded, St. Peter said, "Twelve? Twelve? Forrest, how in
Heaven's name could you come up with twelve seconds in a year?"
Forrest replied, "Shucks, there's got to be twelve:
January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd.... "
"Hold it," interrupts St. Peter. "I see where you are going with
this, and I see your point, though that was not quite what I had
in mind.....but I will have to give you credit for that one, too. Let
us go
on with the third and final question. Can you tell me God's first
name"?
"Sure," Forrest replied, "it's Andy."
"Andy?" exclaimed an exasperated and frustrated St Peter.
"Ok, I can understand how you came up with your answers to
my first two questions, but just how in the world did you come
up with the name Andy as the first name of God?"
"Shucks, that was the easiest one of all," Forrest replied. "I learnt
it
from the song, "ANDY WALKS WITH ME, ANDY TALKS WITH ME,
ANDY TELLS ME I AM HIS OWN. . . "
St. Peter opened the Pearly Gates, and said: "Run Forrest, run."
hopefully soon
