Laid off--Support thread

[kellig]

I'm having a very hard time today staying positive. I've had my days of crying and thought I was past all of that, but today I just can't seem to stay positive and happy. I'm at work and that is usually where I can let my "real feelings" come out since I have to be so positive at home.

DH has been trying so hard this week to make contacts, set up meetings, etc in efforts to find a job. I'm just so worried because I know we only have a limited time before we'll have to make decisions about selling our house, his truck, and other stuff just to stay afloat and make our mortgage payment.

Is anyone else feeling this anxiety? How are you getting past it and staying positive at home for your DH who feels like crap over his lost job? Any help would be GREATLY appreciated!

 

[kathianne]

Well, I didn't mean to totally cut out headhunters, they have their place, just don't rely on them soley.

Our experience with headhunters has been pretty much as I described in my above post, just spin your wheels.

My dh has a job interview tomorrow that looks promising, he got it on his own, through contacts, lets hope it goes well.

 

[kathianne]

A question about unemployment--my dh is looking at Cah Cah for some extra income while laid off. Would that Cha Cha income decrease his unemployment benefit?

 

[adkkev]

A question about unemployment--my dh is looking at Cah Cah for some extra income while laid off. Would that Cha Cha income decrease his unemployment benefit?

In NY State we have to report any and ALL income ... I don't know if it's changed, but if you worked one or two days a week, they reduced your unemployment check by 1/4 to 1/2.

 

[T. Lynn]

Hey, dh got a call tonight, scheduled an interview for Friday!

Its a great sounding job, so lets hope!

Also, I'm going to a job fair Monday, so we have options!

Congrats! Please keep us posted. It's even hard just to get an interview!

I actually had mine today and it went pretty good. I love the company (actually a state college campus), job description, hours (9-1) and everything. I'm trying to stay positive as they are making a decision sometime tomorrow. Also, I thought I was horrible on my telephone interview and they were actually impressed. That was a shocker...

Shortly after I left my interview I got calls from 2 other places. Now I have 2 additional interviews set up for Monday. Both are part-time with the hours I'm looking for, so I can get daughter off bus.

This should help me stay positive that even if I'm not offered the first job (which is the one I really want), then 2 more are waiting in the wind and I at least have interviews so their considering me. I was getting worried there for awhile knowing I sent out a ton of resumes and not even a bite.

 

[Disneydreamer5]

I'm having a very hard time today staying positive. I've had my days of crying and thought I was past all of that, but today I just can't seem to stay positive and happy. I'm at work and that is usually where I can let my "real feelings" come out since I have to be so positive at home.

DH has been trying so hard this week to make contacts, set up meetings, etc in efforts to find a job. I'm just so worried because I know we only have a limited time before we'll have to make decisions about selling our house, his truck, and other stuff just to stay afloat and make our mortgage payment.

Is anyone else feeling this anxiety? How are you getting past it and staying positive at home for your DH who feels like crap over his lost job? Any help would be GREATLY appreciated!

I know exactly how you are feeling and believe me you are not alone in those feelings. I worked 2 days a week as I mentioned and being around attorneys all day that I know are sitting pretty with their big house's, nice cars and terrific vacations all I do is cry on and off all day long.
My husband was out of work for 9 months from an accident at work and he went back in May. We have been struggling to get caught up and were well on our way when I was laid off. It just seems somedays that we will never get out of this funk.
As for staying positive, I pray a lot. I don't know how you feel personally about pray but it can help. Also as much as you don't want to further upset your hubby I would at least let him know that you are conerned but that you know something will come his way because he is a good person and a hard worker and someone somewhere is bond to see that. As much as you think he don't want to hear that you are worried it will make him feel better to know he is not alone in his concern.
I don't know if that helps but I just wanted you to know that someone was thinking of you and knows how you are feeling.
My thoughts and prayers are will you and I hope everything works out for all of us.

 

[ldb1030]

I feel your pain. I too worked 3 days a week at a Title company getting really good money and the other 2 days at a law office. I was laid off from the Title company so I too have to deduct what I get from my other job from my unemployment benefits. Its total BULL what are you suppose to do with that little. Now adays especially. $19? You can get a gallon of milk, loaf of bread and maybe a dozen eggs. After working my whole life, when things get bad you have no where to turn. The best and funniest thing I heard this week is that my family of 7 can't get any help because we make too much money!
We are barely paying our bills, food shopping has been reduce to the absolute minium amount, I don't drive my car unless its for a job interview or have to pick up the kids somewhere, DH works 65 hours a week and we aren't intitled to any help, CRAZY doesn't exactly say it all but it fits. As you say tears are just about dried up, have to laugh about it or I would go insane!

Wow! Can't believe I saw this thread! Should have known it existed though!
Okay, I know NOTHING about unemployment as I've never needed it! We just got our hours cut also. I was 3 days per week and now down to 2. I know, I know, you are saying "geez, you really were not working to begin with" but I've had the 3 day per week schedule for 17 yrs and learned to live on that! So losing that full day every week will really affect my paycheck!
Have been figuring I'd get another job to make up for that. Do I even look into unemployment?? For $19.00 that some people get, I would even get less I bet.

I've had alot of crying, really bad days and I wish you all the best that are going through the same crap!

 

[Kathi OD]

Wow! Can't believe I saw this thread! Should have known it existed though!
Okay, I know NOTHING about unemployment as I've never needed it! We just got our hours cut also. I was 3 days per week and now down to 2. I know, I know, you are saying "geez, you really were not working to begin with" but I've had the 3 day per week schedule for 17 yrs and learned to live on that! So losing that full day every week will really affect my paycheck!
Have been figuring I'd get another job to make up for that. Do I even look into unemployment?? For $19.00 that some people get, I would even get less I bet.

I've had alot of crying, really bad days and I wish you all the best that are going through the same crap!

33% is a big hit to your budget whether you're working 3 days or 5 days. I know that in some places if you work part-time you are not eligible for unemployment. The best way to find out is too call your state's office for unemployment benefits.

 

[kathianne]

its tough working for a law firm, seeing them with their expensive lunches,trips, etc, then laying people off! a little belt tightening on their part would help save a few of us lesser being's jobs!

 

[T. Lynn]

This is a great thread. Maybe we should start another one with interviews and helpful tips for when interviewing. It can keep you motivated and prepare each other.

My last interview was in 1995 and I found a lot of helpful information online. It would be helpful to have it in one place to help each other out. I've researched and practiced for a whole week because I was so motivated to do a good job and knock their socks off.

I was so prepared today that when I left I really wanted to pat myself on the back. I didn't want to be overly confident (or seem cocky) but by the employers remarks, there is no way I could have done better. My only concern is that they'd hire within.

 

[kellig]

I know exactly how you are feeling and believe me you are not alone in those feelings. I worked 2 days a week as I mentioned and being around attorneys all day that I know are sitting pretty with their big house's, nice cars and terrific vacations all I do is cry on and off all day long.
My husband was out of work for 9 months from an accident at work and he went back in May. We have been struggling to get caught up and were well on our way when I was laid off. It just seems somedays that we will never get out of this funk.
As for staying positive, I pray a lot. I don't know how you feel personally about pray but it can help. Also as much as you don't want to further upset your hubby I would at least let him know that you are conerned but that you know something will come his way because he is a good person and a hard worker and someone somewhere is bond to see that. As much as you think he don't want to hear that you are worried it will make him feel better to know he is not alone in his concern.
I don't know if that helps but I just wanted you to know that someone was thinking of you and knows how you are feeling.
My thoughts and prayers are will you and I hope everything works out for all of us.

Thank you SO much for your response! I knew I could not be the only one going through these feelings. I am a Christian and have prayed more than I thought possible. I think I am having the hardest time with the fact that I have prayed and feel that I have turned it over to the Lord, but am still worried. That obviously tells me I have not turned it all over, but I don't know what more to do.

I have been very open, but positive and supportive with my husband. He is just struggling so much and says that I am what keeps him going and strong.

I do appreciate your response and will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers as well.

Wow! Can't believe I saw this thread! Should have known it existed though!
Okay, I know NOTHING about unemployment as I've never needed it! We just got our hours cut also. I was 3 days per week and now down to 2. I know, I know, you are saying "geez, you really were not working to begin with" but I've had the 3 day per week schedule for 17 yrs and learned to live on that! So losing that full day every week will really affect my paycheck!
Have been figuring I'd get another job to make up for that. Do I even look into unemployment?? For $19.00 that some people get, I would even get less I bet.

I've had alot of crying, really bad days and I wish you all the best that are going through the same crap!

I am so sorry about your cut and lack of unemployment benefits. Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers as well.

This is a great thread. Maybe we should start another one with interviews and helpful tips for when interviewing. It can keep you motivated and prepare each other.

My last interview was in 1995 and I found a lot of helpful information online. It would be helpful to have it in one place to help each other out. I've researched and practiced for a whole week because I was so motivated to do a good job and knock their socks off.

I was so prepared today that when I left I really wanted to pat myself on the back. I didn't want to be overly confident (or seem cocky) but by the employers remarks, there is no way I could have done better. My only concern is that they'd hire within.

I am so glad you felt confident and good about your interview! I think it is hard to remain upbeat and feel good about yourself in times like this...you have made huge strides! Good luck and be sure to let us know!

 

[Disneydreamer5]

Hey everyone, hope you all ae doing better today then I.
Today is the start of Jersey week. For anyone who don't know what that is, at this time every year our schools have 3 days off during the week and just about 90% of families here go on some kind of vacation this week.
I have been trying to be part of that 90% for the last 5 years and every year hell or high water something ruins it for us.
This year its my lay off. Just having a hard day as everyone around me has either left yesterday or this morning or tomorrow morning.
The worst part of this is many and I mean many are going to Disney which is an even bigger punch in the gut for me and mine.
We weren't heading to Disney but we were going to take the kids to Vermont for a fews days but I would have missed today and Monday(the only 2 days I now still have work) so that was out of the question.
Just really down on myself right now and need some support.

 

[Nicholfamily5]

DisneyDreamer

I am sure you are hurting something fierce right now. I've been reading the whole thread and I see so much fear and pain. I want you to know that it won't always be this hard. Today is one day, tomorrow another. Find something to lift your spirits this minute. Even if it just looking out the window and watching something beautiful. Take a hot shower, put on some makeup. Do something for yourself.
Your family will miss out on a fancy vacation. I know exactly how that feels. I recently had to cancel a paid for disney trip that was meant to be an adult only anniversary trip. I thank God I canceled, because right now we are so broke. If we had gone we would have been even worse.
Take the time with your family to be thankful. Teach your children to be thankful for the warm home, safe neighborhood and food to eat. We have all been living a high life, and we are now finding it make or break to return to a simpler lifestyle.
It will take time to adjust, there will be good days and bad. Take care of yourself and know that you can always come here for a little of the Magic.

You are in my thoughts today, please pm me if you need someone to talk to, vent, or escape with disney dreams! Cheer up, my friend, happy days will come again.

 

[Disneydreamer5]

Thats the thing of it. I have never lived the high life.
Everytime it seems like we are about to finially get ahead of the game,BAM something puts us right back down.
My house has needed renovations for years that we can't afford.
This is the 2nd year in a row that vacation had to be canceled.
Also the 2nd year in a row that I was laid off.(gottta get out of the Real Estate field)
Its just never ending and most days ya know I can handle it all because I know what the positives are.
I have 5 great,good hearted,respectful kids that really are just amazing people. My husband is one of the hardest working men I know.
I have both my parents who are always there if things get really bad, I try not to burden them but sometimes they just know something is wrong.
I do have a lot that is good in my life and I honestly wouldn't trade it for all the money in the world. I just don't get why some people get to have everything, while we just continue to always seem to be struggling just to get ahead.
Again, as I said before I am just having myself a little pity party over there today, I'm really sorry.
Thanks for the support though, it means so much right now.

 

[T. Lynn]

Thats the thing of it. I have never lived the high life.
Everytime it seems like we are about to finially get ahead of the game,BAM something puts us right back down.
My house has needed renovations for years that we can't afford.
Its just never ending and most days ya know I can handle it all because I know what the positives are.
Again, as I said before I am just having myself a little pity party over there today, I'm really sorry.
Thanks for the support though, it means so much right now.

Trust me, you are truly not alone! Definately don't live the high life and once we get ahead, I get knocked right back down and further down than what I was before. Need renovations as well but they sit and wait.

It's a bad day for me, crying, getting worked up and everything. I'm trying to stay positive but it's just not a good day for me today and I'm an emotional wreck.

Can I join the party?

 

[kellig]

I'm so sorry to hear that you all are having a rough day today! I had a really bad day yesterday and am finally feeling more positive today. I wish I had words of encouragement, but all I can say is that I have relied on my faith in Jesus more than ever. He has really provided me strength today and I feel so blessed. I am hoping others will be able to pull strength and encouragement today as well.

Good luck to all that have interviews and job fairs coming up!

 

[Disneydreamer5]

Trust me, you are truly not alone! Definately don't live the high life and once we get ahead, I get knocked right back down and further down than what I was before. Need renovations as well but they sit and wait.

It's a bad day for me, crying, getting worked up and everything. I'm trying to stay positive but it's just not a good day for me today and I'm an emotional wreck.

Can I join the party?

OMG, you sound just like me today.Ofcourse you can join the party, I just truly wish you didn't have too. Just know someone else is feeling what you feel today and you are not alone.
I have been going back and forth with day dreaming and reality checks,crying, bills I can't pay, dinners we can't attend,all the resumes I sent that I haven't gotten one reply too.
Awful.
Have to shake this.
Lets play if I won a million dollars..........
What would you do?
You all first.

 

[T. Lynn]

Just called about my interview. I've been pacing the floors and I couldn't take it anymore.

Apparently they were wanting to call me but waiting for the final starting pay amount. They did give me a range the day I was there and it's perfect...higher than other places hiring (at this point, I don't care). It's also at a university so I thought it would be good on my resume and hours are great incase I need my mom as a back up sitter.

 

[peggster]

This is a great thread. Maybe we should start another one with interviews and helpful tips for when interviewing. It can keep you motivated and prepare each other.

My last interview was in 1995 and I found a lot of helpful information online. It would be helpful to have it in one place to help each other out. I've researched and practiced for a whole week because I was so motivated to do a good job and knock their socks off.

I was so prepared today that when I left I really wanted to pat myself on the back. I didn't want to be overly confident (or seem cocky) but by the employers remarks, there is no way I could have done better. My only concern is that they'd hire within.

T. Lynn,

I was wondering if you could point me (and others) to some of the information you found helpful in the interviewing process: websites to check, etc.

Also, congrats on the positive news about your interview!

 

[lovingmy2boys]

Add me to the list of people being laid off. I will be laid off by the end of the year due to our building closing. All of us are being let go. I have been with the same company fopr 11 years. It is tough to think about having to go out and interview again. I will thankfully receive 3 months severance. I had a baby in July and I found out the week after she was born. So not good timing. I sometimes think that maybe it is a blessing in disguise for me. I will be able to stay home for a few months with my new baby and enjoy her. We will need to tighten our belts.

DH and I decided that we are still going to go on our trip in March because if we don't we do not know when we may be able to go. He will be getting a decent bonus soon so that will more than pay for DIsney and Christmas.

I am sorry to all that is laid off or who are going to be laid off.