Ladies, sons and bathrooms

[Tara1988]

And not all men peep in the men's room.

I fail to see how the men's room can be generalized as such a bad scary place because of what may happen there but we should disregard our daughters safety and comfort and only deal with a problem if and when it occurs?

It's not about the men's room being a bad scary place, it's about a young child having to be separated from their parents. The majority of the time, the girl is in there with her mother. Why can't little boys have that same safety and security?

 

[Gracie09]

It's not about the men's room being a bad scary place, it's about a young child having to be separated from their parents. The majority of the time, the girl is in there with her mother. Why can't little boys have that same safety and security?

Half the time my girls are out and about in the world with their father. Why is that never the question asked - where the girls go to the bathroom. They just go to thei gender appropriate bathroom when they are school aged or thereabouts. Why is that appropriate for girls but not boys? There are options at Disney they are just not as convenient.

 

[mjkacmom]

It's not about the men's room being a bad scary place, it's about a young child having to be separated from their parents. The majority of the time, the girl is in there with her mother. Why can't little boys have that same safety and security?

Why do you think 8 year old girls are with their mom? My girls went into the ladies room all of the time without me, starting around 5/6, like my boys. Kids will survive (and actually flourish) not being joined at the hip with mom.

 

[Angel Ariel]

I don't see how this is the same. A child (boy or girl) having to go in a crowded bathroom alone because they have a different gender adult with them is not the same as a teenage/preteen girl using a private stall next to someone who they can't see and can't see them. If menstruation is that uncomfortable for them, they might be better off using a private family bathroom. Respect the privacy of the person in the next stall, and their gender won't be an issue for you. Seriously if a girl is that uncomfortable with and embarrassed by what they are going through, they would be just as uncomfortable and embarrassed regardless of the gender of all the strangers around them.

They are in the correct bathroom for their gender. It's not their responsibility or duty to find a single person restroom to accommodate an older boy being in the ladies room. If an older boy can't go into the men's room, then the older boy (with a parent ) should be the one seeking out a companion restroom.

You are also assuming that a menstruating girl is a teenager. Many young girls are beginning puberty before their teenage years.

 

[Tara1988]

It's not myself I'm concerned about. I don't give a hoot about a boy in the restroom while I'm there. This is about infringing on other GIRLS rights. I will never imply to my 4yo DD that she is safe because "he's only 8".

A quick google news search is showing me plenty of instances of 8yo boys committing sex crimes. I don't know how to link on here and don't know what good it would do anyway.

And my daughter still goes in a stall with me, I have no son. Not sure what that last part is supposed to mean?

But your daughter is with you, so she's safe from that 8 year old under your supervision. But if that 8 year old has to go in an unfamiliar crowded bathroom alone, who does he have to keep him safe or make him feel safe the times there is no real danger?

 

[Tara1988]

They are in the correct bathroom for their gender. It's not their responsibility or duty to find a single person restroom to accommodate an older boy being in the ladies room. If an older boy can't go into the men's room, then the older boy (with a parent ) should be the one seeking out a companion restroom.

You are also assuming that a menstruating girl is a teenager. Many young girls are beginning puberty before their teenage years.

The age of debate here is 8, which I don't consider "older". I wouldn't let an 8 year old walk around the mall alone, would you?

 

[Angel Ariel]

An 8 year old boy and an 8 year old girl are equally clueless about what that girl is going through. So that is not a sufficient reason to say an 8 year old boy can't go into a bathroom with his mother. Maybe I let my children be children for too long, but I don't see the next 3 years making my 5 year old mature enough to walk around Disney world alone.

Oh my goodness. Who is advocating letting an 8 year old walk around WDW alone?! Letting them use a restroom alone, with parent standing right outside the door is light years away from letting them walk around wdw alone.

 

[mjkacmom]

But your daughter is with you, so she's safe from that 8 year old under your supervision. But if that 8 year old has to go in an unfamiliar crowded bathroom alone, who does he have to keep him safe or make him feel safe the times there is no real danger?

I'm just going to assume you don't know any 8 year old boys by the way you are assuming they are scared little babies. It is not normal for an 8 year old boy to be afraid of the men's room! That is absurd. And a little frightening.

 

[Angel Ariel]

The age of debate here is 8, which I don't consider "older". I wouldn't let an 8 year old walk around the mall alone, would you?

See my previous post.

 

[Hikergirl]

It's not about the men's room being a bad scary place, it's about a young child having to be separated from their parents. The majority of the time, the girl is in there with her mother. Why can't little boys have that same safety and security?

They can, in a family/companion bathroom. There comes an age when a boy isn't a "little" boy anymore, and I think 8 is a good age for that. For reference my son was 8 in 3rd grade and the beginning of 4th, that is too old to be going into the woman's restroom.

 

[Angel Ariel]

It's not about the men's room being a bad scary place, it's about a young child having to be separated from their parents. The majority of the time, the girl is in there with her mother. Why can't little boys have that same safety and security?

What exactly do you think dads who are out in public..wdw or anywhere else...alone with their 8 year old daughters do?

 

[BJ7644]

It's not about the men's room being a bad scary place, it's about a young child having to be separated from their parents. The majority of the time, the girl is in there with

But your daughter is with you, so she's safe from that 8 year old under your supervision. But if that 8 year old has to go in an unfamiliar crowded bathroom alone, who does he have to keep him safe or make him feel safe the times there is no real danger?

My DD is with me now cause she's 4 and I posted earlier that she wouldn't go into a stall to potty when a 4/5 year old boy was in the restroom.

Again, I see no problem with an older boy in the ladies room if he's under direct supervision of mom, including being in the stall with her.

What would you feel is an appropriate age for a mom to stop escorting her daughter into the ladies room?

 

[aaarcher86]

An 8 year old boy and an 8 year old girl are equally clueless about what that girl is going through. So that is not a sufficient reason to say an 8 year old boy can't go into a bathroom with his mother. Maybe I let my children be children for too long, but I don't see the next 3 years making my 5 year old mature enough to walk around Disney world alone.

Totally disagree with you. Eight year old boys know a heck of a lot more than I did at 8 years old. The things my daughter gets off the bus telling more or horrifying. Is your 5 year old your first? 8 is the new 13 for inappropriate behavior I think.

I've also experienced, what I hope, was an isolated 8/9 year being a sexual deviant. Like, serial killer style scary.

Is someone suggesting letting an 8 year old tour the park all by themselves? Quite a leap.

 

[aaarcher86]

My son's school is. Each classroom has their own bathroom that all the students use. When the class had swim lessons, they all changed in private stalls of the same locker room, because being naked in front of anyone, regardless of gender, is not okay. I teach my children that it is not okay for anyone to see their private parts and it is not okay for them to look at anyone else's. Because when it comes to inappropriate behavior and sexual predators, being the same gender doesn't make it okay.

Well, that's all well and good I guess. We don't have classroom bathrooms. Never had a school that did.

And for us, there's a difference between appropriate nakedness and predatory behavior. We don't teach our kids there's anything shameful with nakedness or their bodies. We teach them what's appropriate and who it's appropriate with.

I don't know about boys, but I'm pretty sure they're just as free in locker rooms and changing in front of each other as girls.

 

[Gracie09]

Oh my goodness. Who is advocating letting an 8 year old walk around WDW alone?! Letting them use a restroom alone, with parent standing right outside the door is light years away from letting them walk around wdw alone.

Actually at wdw a 7 year old can ride alone and presumably walk around by themselves.

 

[aaarcher86]

Because no one is at risk of an 8 year old sexualy assaulting you. If the gap thing is such an issue you can take the kid into a stall with you or put him in a stall by himself.

I've been sexually assaulted by a 9 year old, so yeah. You absolutely can be.

 

[Angel Ariel]

Actually at wdw a 7 year old can ride alone and presumably walk around by themselves.

Even if I might let a 7 or 8 year old in line by themselves..that's still a far cry from letting them loose in all of wdw by themselves...

 

[aaarcher86]

Even if I might let a 7 or 8 year old in line by themselves..that's still a far cry from letting them loose in all of wdw by themselves...

No, I agree. And I think you have to be 14 to get into the park without an adult. They're worlds apart on the independence scale.

I have no idea how Tara got walking around WDW as a child from suggestions that they can use the restroom alone.

 

[Tara1988]

Because they are just girls. They just have to be taught to not be uncomfortable and just accommodate a boys feelings because their own feelings just don't matter.
I think I'm going to tell my dd that when she dates a boy she has to ask him one very important question- did your mom make you use the ladies room when your were 8 or older. If the answer is yes, she better run far away from that one

We're not talking about making an 8 year old use the ladies room. We're talking about not making an 8 year old go into a crowded bathroom without adult supervision if that isn't something they can handle.

 

[Tara1988]

Most of the women in my family hit puberty by 10. For me it was 8, menstruation and all. My 8yo male classmates certainty noticed my new growth.

And did you handle your menstruation out in the open in a public restroom? No. It was all done behind a closed stall door. So what does the person in the next stall have to do with you menstruating?

 

[mjkacmom]

And did you handle your menstruation out in the open in a public restroom? No. It was all done behind a closed stall door. So what does the person in the next stall have to do with you menstruating?

Back when I was an adolescent girl, there were no boys in public restrooms, parents treated their children in age appropriate manners.