Kids on planes...

[Madame]

Sorry if this is posted in the wrong place, but I didn't know where to put it. We will be travelling from Detroit to Orlando in late August. This will be my children's first time on a plane. One of my twins (they turn 5 Aug 5th) is, well, adverse to new experiences. He refused to get on a fishing boat last summer and refused to go down any slides at Great Wolf Lodge in March. As our trip approaches I'm imagining him losing it on or before or as we get on the plane.

I have already resigned myself to the fact that he will probably not want to ride anything. I will encourage him to try but not a big deal. He DOES need to get on the plane!! LOL!! I have talked to him about it & he knows every step from getting to the airport to getting off the plane & he seems enthusiastic. He was also excited about the boat & the water slides, until we got there!

I'm having nightmare images about him wigging out & having to take him off the plane.

Anyone ever dealt with kids with anxiety issues like this?
Any tips or tricks would be really appreciated-I figure if I have a plan it'll stop ME from be so anxious!
TIA

 

[Mrsjvb]

talk to you pediatrician./ if he does wig out you will be refused access to to the plane or kicked off if you cannot control him/calm him down.

 

[harleys mom]

Have you thought about going to the airport to just watch the planes take off? I will be interested to see what suggestions everyone has as we will be taking my niece on her first trip to Disney in August as well. Small world as we almost flew our of Detroit International. We will be flying out on Indianapolis as my parents are coming down here.

I was terrified my first trip until the plane took off. Now I love to fly!

How does he do on car trips? If he doesn't look out the window, it really isn't that much different. Just a seat with a seat belt. You might try having gum, or candy to suck on as the elevation change may bother his ears..I am so glad my niece loves "adventures" The only thing we are worried about is her being home sick. Thank goodness for cell phones.

 

[auralia]

I'd buy him a plane toy to give him at the airport that he can fly around and play with. Also bring with any special stuffed animal he may like to hug. My DS loves to fly his toy dusty plane around when we are the airport and on the plane... perhaps this would amuse him...a toy plane in the real plane?

 

[minnie mum]

Have to agree with a PP. Take him to his doctor. He has already exhibited anxiety issues with new experiences and the last thing you want is to be denied boarding or to be removed from the flight. There are meds for this. They won't knock him out and will reduce his anxiety to a level that you can hopefully handle.

Have something (or better yet several things) that will distract him. Maybe a favorite game or movie on your tablet. Music. Get a good headset to help dampen some of the noise. And whatever you do, be calm and relaxed and reassure him that everything is normal and safe.

Good luck.

 

[Gottahavemorecowbell]

Sorry that this is becoming a concern to you. Make no mistake though, as a previous poster mentioned, if he flips out really bad you may very well be asked to leave the plane. You know him better than anyone so my advice is only related to what we do for our kids. Fortunately, they love flying. However, we always have an IPad or a small DVD player handy to keep them occupied. We bring snacks, coloring books, and about anything else we can to keep them from getting too restless. Your specific flight is usually in the 2 hr. range or maybe a little longer so that helps. He will probably feed off of your body language/energy as well. So stay calm and Disney on! Stay encouraged and hopefully things will work out very well. Good luck and enjoy your trip.

 

[BuzzinDownToDisney]

Even if he doesn't want to do any rides, there has to be something he'll consider magical about WDW. Maybe watch the planning video and see if he focuses on something positively, then really keep emphasizing how the awesome, fun plane will bring him to experience that thing in person.

And as PP said, tablets/laptops etc. are your friend.

Good luck!

 

[Madame]

Yes maybe we should take him to watch planes at the airport. That's a good idea! I was thinking maybe several little grab bags with a few candies/dollar store toys, one for each step... Now we are going through security, let's see what's in this bag, that sort of thing. Maybe wrapped in gift paper to distract him. I never bribe my kids, but he's a 4 year old boy ( & just a little hyper) so while his sister would be content to colour the entire time, he will not. Maybe if he's distracted or looking forward to the next step/bag it will help...

 

[Ronda93]

Someone suggested, and I second, a trip to the airport. If your airport is nearby, do it. I don't know how close you may be able to get to the gates. But let him see as much as possible. Rub the "new" off of it. You might even try to get a gate pass to take him through security.

I've read of some having success asking ticketing agents for a gate pass to meet a passenger. Look at the arrivals and pick a flight. Can't hurt to try.

Good luck.

 

[Crl1817]

I have a anxious kid, though he never had trouble with flying. A regular pediatrician has never been of any help with anxiety. I don't know, maybe if you are willing to do meds. . . . . But I'd be reluctant to go that route in part because you never know how a kid is going to react to the meds. Mine was briefly on ADHD meds which cause mood swings and anger--the only time in his entire life he has ever argued with a teacher. He has also completely flipped out with the meds the dentist gave for anxiety. He committed multiple felonies that day--as dh says ds is a mean drunk. I'm also not that comfortable with a regular Ped treating anxiety.

If anxiety is interfering with daily living, I would suggest you consider a therapist. Cognitive behavioral therapy has some pretty good research backing it up.


For this particular concern, I would try to watch some television episodes or read some books where kids fly and have a good time. I would also consider writing a social story for him--you can google it, but it is basically step by step written and illustrated directions for what will happen and what is expected of him. Try to include as many possibilities as you can (so, "The security guard may or may not ask johnny to take your shoes off. If they ask, Johnny calmly takes his shoes off and puts them in the bin. Johnny knows he will get his shoes back.")

For my kid too much advance notice just gave him a chance to get more worked up. So I would do generic preparation like reading books ahead of time, but not tell him why until a day or two beforehand.

Good luck!

 

[ktlm]

DD(8) has never been a big fan of flying as she is a little afraid of heights. Get him his own small carry on that he picks out himself, then let him take a couple of his toys/books in it, but also buy some new plane activity things for it that he does not get until he is on the plane and the plane takes off. That will give him something to look forward to. Usually, I would buy the things and let DD see them before the trip so she was really excited that she would get them and couldn't wait for the plane to take off (and she is not a fan of take offs- she is generlly mostly okay with the rest of it). I might also have a thing or two packed in as a surprise, but it sounds like he needs to know what it is, and you might even let him pick out something he really wants himself. With DD, it was things like paper doll sets, art sets, colored pens and markers, fashion design kits etc. Just anything that will keep him busy on the plane that is small enough to pack in the carry-on and that you can get him excited about to look forward to being on the plane and getting it. Might even be little lego sets or something if he is into those, but if you do that I would include ziploc bags to hold them in and have him leave the pieces in the bag and dig them out one by one while he builds so they don't fall everywhere and get lost.

Oh- and based on DD, I would NOT encourage him to look out the window. If he decides to look on his own fine, but I would suggest putting him in a middle seat if you can, so he will feel more secure with people on either side of him. The first time DD looked out the plane window and realized how high up she was, she about flipped out. She still rarely looks out the window- our last trip I think she finally started looking out a bit more. Usually, the first thing she does when she gets in her seat is climb over me and shut the window blind. Also, is he excited about Disney? If he is then if he starts to stress out, keep reminding him that the plane is taking him to Disney. DD might not like flying, but if it is getting her to Disney, she will deal with it. Try to get him involved doing something during take-off- like you reading a story to him or playing a game with him etc. DD is still terrified of take offs even though she has been flying for years and distractions usually help although often she still is clutching my arm hard enough to leave marks and has her head buried in my chest during take off.

Also- we are not above bribery to get DD on WDW rides (although I think the only non-thrill ride we have had to use it on is Pirates). If he refuses to get on absolutely anything, bribe him onto Small World. It is so incredibly tame that after that, he might be willing to try something else.

 

[kapoof]

I like the idea of having a new favorite toy, but not letting him have it until he is seated on the plane and behaving. Really prep him with lots of exciting info about the plane and how much fun it all is. We didn't fly until my son was in second grade, by then a raised eyebrow is all he needed to shape up. He is now 17 and the raised eyebrow still works. good luck on your trip, I hope he will atleast ride Peter Pan. He should have lots of fun.

 

[JillyBean1899]

Check with the local school/group for autistic spectrum kids. I know the one here has a day where they take the kids to the airport and practice getting on a plane, sitting there for 30 minutes, then getting back off (of course this is done over by the hangars, not out on the actual runway, and our airport isn't huge). Apparently it works wonders for actually getting on a real airplane for a trip, because they've been on the one already. It doesn't simulate takeoff or the flight itself, of course, but it might be one more step to get him comfortable with it.

 

[Madame]

Thanks for all the ideas! We are going to take him to the airport and definitely bring an ipad and his headphones. I told him we were going to take him to watch the planes & the first thing out of his mouth was will it be loud? He's terrified of thunderstorms & has gotten used to the lawn mower but won't go near it when it's running, sigh. I want to prepare him but don't want to dwell on it - it will increase his anxiety. He tends to worry away at things. I seriously hope this is a phase, but it does make his life difficult. I don't want him to miss out on things he'd enjoy because he's too scared to try! I don't mind searching out calmer attractions for him in the parks - I'm more of a low-key ride person myself so I'll take him to more m&g and shows. I think distraction is the way to go on the plane, not sure about meds though...

 

[cattywampus]

http://www.earplugstore.com/ear-muffs-for-children.html

Plus, I would go the route of several small wrapped gifts given at specific intervals that he knows ahead of time. I would even take a sharpie and write on each gift:

Board Plane/Sit in Seat
Takeoff
30 minutes
60 minutes
etc.

Not advising or condoning, but many parents swear by children's benadryl....

 

[JanaDee]

http://www.earplugstore.com/ear-muffs-for-children.html

Plus, I would go the route of several small wrapped gifts given at specific intervals that he knows ahead of time. I would even take a sharpie and write on each gift:

Board Plane/Sit in Seat
Takeoff
30 minutes
60 minutes
etc.

Not advising or condoning, but many parents swear by children's benadryl....

Anything wrapped won't make it through security. It will either be unwrapped or confiscated. That is why the TSA always tells people around the holidays to NOT wrap gifts.

 

[cattywampus]

Anything wrapped won't make it through security. It will either be unwrapped or confiscated. That is why the TSA always tells people around the holidays to NOT wrap gifts.

good point. Could use a grab bag or bring small gift bags to put stuff in at airport.

I would also think about putting him "in charge" of certain things. If you are flying SW, he could pick seats, carry certain luggage, be in charge of getting dad on the plane, whatever. Kids like control and the more you can convince him he has, the better off you will be.

 

[JillyBean1899]

If loud noises bothers him, sit as close to the front of the plane as possible. Avoid the wings and the seats directly around them at all costs. Those are very loud. Noise canceling headphones, while expensive, are a godsend.

 

[practicallyperfect77]

Not sure if it works for kiddos, but I have noise sensitivity issues (repetitive noises make me get all riled up and I kinda want to punch things..don't worry...I never have), but taking magnesium has really helped. Obviously would need to research proper dosage for kids. I also believe in using essential oils and lavender has been known to provide calmness. You can rub on feet if you don't like the smell. I know this probably sounds a little weird to most but it really has worked wonders for lots of folks and not really side effects like you would have with some meds.

 

[Straughn]

One of my best friends had a similar problem with her daughter, age 4 at the time. After a disastrous flight from Paris to Washington, DC because of turbulence, the little girl went ballistic at the thought of getting on an airplane. They wanted to take her to WDW and did not want to drive. So it was on a plane or not go. Nothing they said about meeting princesses, fun rides (the little girl loved carnivals and Ferris wheels, etc - she was fearless about that) worked. She did not want to get on an airplane. My friend took the little girl to the airport and looked for families with young children. She waited at baggage claim for flights coming in from Orlando and would ask the parents about their children's experience and if it was good, she then asked if her daughter could talk to their child. She wasn't so much looking for a good flight experience as she was looking for good Disney experiences. Worked like a charm. The little girl was so psyched about WDW that she almost ran on the plane before her parents had the tickets scanned. The lesson from this is to focus on the end result not the stuff in between. Worked for them, may not work for someone else's child.