Keeping a large family organized...and keeping it that way.

[LovesTimone]

My girl friend just called me and was really upset, they just did a bunch of remodeling on their house last year ( mid year it was finished) they spent a ton on getting organized. She said that it is right back to the chaos it was before they spent all that money to remodel. She really needs to get a plan that they can work with and stick to. Her biggest thing is how do large families do it... stay organized??

Here's the breakdown and some back story. My Friend and her DH, DS1 - 10 yrs. old - DS2 - 8 yrs. old - Twin DD's 4 yrs. old - plus a niece - 8yrs old, nephew 6 yrs. old - My friend and her husband had the first 2 boys so family of 4 - then she had a bout with a cold and antibiotic - then add in the twins family of 6. Then they adopted her brothers kids super long story, the super skinny version - parents got into super big trouble, no - other family members would take them, so my friends found out right before they were going to foster care, so they happily took them, and adopted them, this was necessary under all the circumstances. Those kids need some real stability in their lives.

She really needs help. Her main focus is
1 - getting everyone out the door for school with what they need, and dressed & breakfast.
2 - getting homework, chores, studying done
3 - keeping up with the extra sports, dance, and music lessons
4 - bath-time and bed time are pure chaos.
5 - Laundry and cleaning.

I gave her some idea's, but she really need someone who has hands on experience.
So please lend a hand..

 

[mjkacmom]

Well, I manage pretty well, in my 1800 square foot house, with 1 1/2 baths!

Her kids are old enough to take showers (no one over the age of 3 gets a bath here), dress themselves in the morning before coming downstairs, and put their own clothes away.

At least the 8 and 10 year olds can fix their owns breakfasts, and actually fix breakfast for the 4 and 6 year olds.

Laundry, in this house, gets done daily. I wash, dry, fold, and deliver to the bedrooms. The kids have been responsible for putting it away since forever.

Homework gets done right after school. The only exception is if, for whatever reason, you aren't home right after school.

I have a huge wall calendar in my kitchen, listing everyday activities. I live and breathe my calendar, and look at it about a dozen times every day. At the beginning of each month, I jot down the regular schedules (daily dance, soccer, etc.), and then just add things as they come along.

Believe it or not, I get groceries about three times a month. I order online, and pick it up. I'm sure your friend has the same issue of spending $350+ for a large order, and then less than a week later, be out of food. That's when we eat the stuff we really don't want to. When the fridge is nearly cleared up, it gets filled up again.

Bedtime is bedtime (for the younger set - the teens have no bedtime). Go upstairs, brush your teeth, go potty, get in bed. The end.

My best advice is to delegate responsibility to the kids - it's amazing what they are capable of. All of my kids can do some cooking, wash dishes, do laundry, clean, etc. If the house starts to look like a disaster, assign chores right then and there. Most of mine are actually happy to help!

 

[way2tyred]

.

 

[squirrel]

Charts!

The younger ones do a chart for all the things they need to do in the morning in order. Use pictures with words since they can't read (most likely). Get dressed, make bed, breakfast, brush teeth & hair, etc.

They are all old enough to help out. Have two dirty hampers one dark in color for the dark clothes and light/white one for the light/white clothes. Have the children put them in the correct hamper.

Make a chore list for the kids-vacuum, dust, garbage, dishes, setting table, etc. Mac Tac or laminate it and then put blue tac on the back of each persons name tag and it can be switched around each week without much trouble.

 

[FreeThinker]

I'll bite I have 5 kids and consider myself pretty organized.

1. Morning routine.

a) Make sure you get them all in bed early enough so that they are ready to wake up the next morning. My little ones go to bed at 7:30 on school nights, and the older 2 by 8:00. They get up around 6:45 and are all ready to get dressed and eat. You can't expect them to be cooperative if they are tired.

b) Lay out clothes the night before, include socks and hair bows if necessary. ALl backpacks are packed and ready by the door w/ their coats (we have a place just for this).

c) Make them do for themselves if possible. My kids can make their own breakfast and pack their own lunches. I pre-pack items in boxes the night before, and they just have to make their sandwich and fill their water bottles, and get it all into their lunch boxes. My 8 and 10 year olds make their own, I do the 6 year olds (twins ). Have a routine, I cannot make all 4 lunches at once, it's too much stuff on the counter, so we do it in shifts.

d) Make a morning schedule and stick to it. Have the kids rotate out stations, so one is eating breakfast, one making lunch, and another in the bathroom doing hair/face washing.

2. Homework and Chores

a) Make a schedule (again). I have 4 kids in school, and each can have my attention for 30 minutes for homework help. If it's not your time, and I am busy, you cannot interrupt. If I am not busy I am happy to help. This lets everyone have my undivided attention if needed every day. I do in shifts again. One at the table doing homework with me, one in their room picking up, one doing another random chore. We change every 30 minutes. I try to do dinner while juggling it all.

b) Be reasonable about what chores they can do, and divide them up. I do not like specific chores for each kid, I prefer to just rotate whom I call on to do whatever chore needs done. If I ask one to empty the dishwasher (and I expect it done right then), I'll ask another one to do the next chore, like fold towels. I really don't think kids have a lot of time for chores on school days. Mine can load/unload the dishwasher, wash up lunch containers (older 2 only), and clean up the kitchen. That's pretty much all they do on school days. ON weekends I have them help with laundry. OH, and the littler ones are great at putting away any laundry I fold during the day!

3. Keeping up w/ chores and dance, ect.... Sorry, I decided to just not do any. It's too much trouble for me. Call me a bad mom if you want I would let them *maybe* do one per week, but with 5 kids, that's 5 activities, and I would rather them focus on school and relationships at home.

4. Bathtime and bedtime.

a) Schedule shifts (yes, again!). Mine start at 5:00PM, and when it's your turn, you do your shower and dry your hair. By dinner all the baths are done and clothes for the next day laid out.

b) Start an hour before you want everyone asleep. Make a routine that gets everyone ready for bed. Ours is pick up your room, stories, and then lights out. If they don't settle down, they go to bed 15 minutes earlier the next night

5. Laundry and cleaning

a) My secret weapon against the Laundry Monster? Divide and conquer! Have 2 or 3 kids clothes at a time, do not put everyone's laundry together, it takes too long to fold and too many piles! I do older 2 girls together, twin boys together, and the baby's and mine together, and DH's separately. Get a laundry sorter that holds 3 bags,a nd have the kids sort (play, towels, jeans). When you go to get a load, just take the bag and dump it in! It's already sorted. Yes, it means I have several places that have dirty laundry, but doing it is much easier! And I tend to do one set per day, so all the girls (3 loads), all the boys (2 or 3 loads), ect.

b) Kids fold all towels. The 10 and 8 year old do some other items, particularly their own. Kids put most stuff away. Don't let it pile up! 2 or 3 loads per day is plenty.

c) School tops are all hung, and school jeans all in one drawer. Easy to find clothes! Pick one pr pants and one top in the closet.

d) Get rid of anything you don't need. Too much stuff is too much clutter. Make all drawers easy to see into (as in not crammed full!) This goes for toys or anything. Keep it organized or get rid of it!

e) CLeaning? Do what you can thru the week, and enlist the kids to help. All kids can dust, older ones can do bathrooms (with help and supervision), older ones can sweep and vacuum. Don't be as picky as you would yourself, teach them to do it and allow them to learn. ANd my house is never 100% clean unless we are having company

 

[laughinplace199]

Well, I manage pretty well, in my 1800 square foot house, with 1 1/2 baths!

Her kids are old enough to take showers (no one over the age of 3 gets a bath here), dress themselves in the morning before coming downstairs, and put their own clothes away.

At least the 8 and 10 year olds can fix their owns breakfasts, and actually fix breakfast for the 4 and 6 year olds.

Laundry, in this house, gets done daily. I wash, dry, fold, and deliver to the bedrooms. The kids have been responsible for putting it away since forever.

Homework gets done right after school. The only exception is if, for whatever reason, you aren't home right after school.

I have a huge wall calendar in my kitchen, listing everyday activities. I live and breathe my calendar, and look at it about a dozen times every day. At the beginning of each month, I jot down the regular schedules (daily dance, soccer, etc.), and then just add things as they come along.

Believe it or not, I get groceries about three times a month. I order online, and pick it up. I'm sure your friend has the same issue of spending $350+ for a large order, and then less than a week later, be out of food. That's when we eat the stuff we really don't want to. When the fridge is nearly cleared up, it gets filled up again.

Bedtime is bedtime (for the younger set - the teens have no bedtime). Go upstairs, brush your teeth, go potty, get in bed. The end.

My best advice is to delegate responsibility to the kids - it's amazing what they are capable of. All of my kids can do some cooking, wash dishes, do laundry, clean, etc. If the house starts to look like a disaster, assign chores right then and there. Most of mine are actually happy to help!

This is how it is in our house too - exactly.

It's amazing what kids can do to help, and they (especially the younger ones) are so eager to help. My DS7 dusts better than I do!

OP, does your friend have a teenager in the neighborhood who she could hire for some help? DD14, has started a new babysitting job for a family who has 4 kids under the age of 6. The dad travels a lot and the mom needs help in the afternoons/evenings with dinner prep. homework for the one who is in school, baths, bedtime, etc.

 

[way2tyred]

.

 

[LovesTimone]

OP here

Thanks for all the great advice. I am compiling a list for her. So please keep them coming.

She has this huge laundry/mudroom which has a outside and garage entrance into the house. This is how they enter the house. Which I suggested that she needs to make as a staging area. But simple, some coat hooks, a bench with baskets underneath or shelving to hold some of them but.. one for each person. So that back packs, shoes, coats are in one place. She also has this huge folding table in there. I said that when the kids come home the can pick up what is theirs and take it to their room.

I have another friend that use the clothes basket clean up method. Each kid has a basket. About 30 min before they start getting ready for bed. Each kid take their basket goes through the house picking up what ever is theirs and takes it to their room, then bath time - then each kid take the basket with dirty clothes, towels, sheets whatever to the laundry room sorts them and leaves the basket. Also this is when they bring their back packs down, and any thing that needs to go with them the next day. On a side note; She has them change sheet in the evening. She does not do them all at once but normally 2 kids at a time.

When they come home they take the baskets with clean clothes, towels, sheets back to their room to put away.

Anyone else use this method with the baskets? How does your routine work?

 

[DakotaRose]

I have labels on most storage bins, tubs, drawers, trays, and shelves. Stuff goes astray less when there is a place for everything, and everyone can see where that is.

We have a dresser by the back door. The drawers have baskets or dividers for each of us to keep hats, scarves, gloves separated by person. Sunglasses and keys go in the shallow top drawer. 3m hooks nearby hold ball caps.

Mail and the newspaper are dealt with daily. A set of folders in a plastic hanging file box keeps incoming paper organized.
DH Do in 3 Days -- checked daily
Me Do in 3 Days -- checked daily
DH Action -- checked weekly
Me Action -- checked weekly
Bills -- paid on the 10th and 25th
Filing -- contents filed weekly
Reading material goes in a magazine box--new one in, old one recycled.

School papers and keepsakes: Each child has a large three ring binder. If I want to keep a school paper or certificate, it gets three hole punched and inserted in the binder. Dividers separate school years and plastic sleeves hold ribbons and newspaper clippings. Each child also has a plastic tub for other keepsakes like baby shoes, rolled up artwork, outgrown trophies and favorite toys, crafts they made.

Photos: one photo box per year. Photos inside divided by event or time. One day, I will make albums!

For us, it helped for each person to have a small catch all bin or bowl in their room. (Target has a nice selection of melamine bowls). They keep things like school activity tickets, ear buds , and lip gloss corralled along with whatever else comes out of pockets.