just wondering about bags for kids...

[f7prez]

My daughter forgot her autograph book at the hotel one time. She was wearing a Disney princess visor (light pink) and she had all the characters sign that. New tradition born on the spot. Nothing to carry.

 

[hsmamato2]

"real" mom here... frequently pretty wicked.... my kids wear walmart 5 dollar waist packs with their stuff in them, I carry my stuff,and dh carries our shared water bottle.... been this way since they were about 4-

 

[erddig]

Ok here is my 2 cents.

Kids "like" responsibility, it makes them feel grown up and good about themselves. Giving children responsibilty lays the groundwork for them to grow into responsible adults. Isn't that our goal? That being said, kids make mistakes, the fanny packs bother them, they fumble in them, stuff falls out, they loose the fanny pack...it is work to carry thier stuff and it is work to help them manage thier stuff. I prefer to help them manage thier stuff. I feel I'm getting closer to my goal. RESPONSIBLE KIDS. This is where parental patience is tested, if we get a portion of the day with the kids carrying the fanny packs, we are moving in the right direction.

I got the sarcasim in the OP, enjoy your trip, it will be a special time with your stepkids.

 

[CampbellScot]

Heck why not make them pay for their part of the trip or better yet leave them at home with their real mom. Sounds like they would be better off. Post like yours I find quite sad and no humor in it at all. Those kids did not ask to be in your life it was daddy dearest who chose it for them. Take it out on them and leave the kids alone.

Leave the kids alone?! right...HOW DARE I plan a trip to Disneyworld for them and book a deluxe hotel...HOW DARE I want them to be as comfortable as possible...and mostly HOW DARE I ask them to have some responsibility for themselves. Their "daddy dearest" as you put it, did choose me to be in their lives and thank GOD for that. They are bright wonderful children and I adore them as they adore me...their "REAL" mom likes me too...so put that in your Disney Ears and wear em!!. I mean that in the nicest possible way of course!

To everyone else...THANK YOU!!! I've gotten a lot of great ideas.

DEEKAYPEE, I have an Overland Donner bag as well!! I carry it for all Disney trips. I never thought about getting them their own little bags...good idea!!! I'm also thinking about the waist packs that have water bottle carriers...but then that might get heavy. So we'll see!

I do appreciate all of the kind words as well. I'm glad that the majority of Disers "get" me...honestly, if you really were a mean person would you honestly post it..."Well since I hate my stepkids I am going to make them carry their own things AND fill their bags with rocks so that they know the burden of responsibility..." COME ON.

Why are so many people so hostile to the idea of children having personal responsibilty? They must be the people who end up on shows like Supernanny and Shalom in the Home!!!

 

[Mrs.PrinceCharming]

I have been a mom for 28 years and a proud stepmom for 8 years. I got the tongue in cheek humor in your post immediatly. When my own biological children were 14 and 20 I married my DH who had custody of his 3 yr old dd and 5 yr old ds. I have been the "mom" in the household ever since. I love them absolutely as much as I love my biological children. I rarely refer to them as my stepkids as I don't like the conotation. I would adopt them in heartbeat if I could. Most people just assume they are my biological children.

Funny going along with the Disney theme, when Lilo and Stitch first came out I took the kids to see it. I told them that since I chose to become their step mom, they were my own little Stitches. They knew I meant this in the most loving way and they like being Stitches - mischevious at times but great kids alround.

There is a poem that I wish I could find. It is called The Meanest Mom In The World and it is all tongue in cheek about being a responsible mom and therefore the "meanest mom in the world." That is what the original post reminded of.

By the DH, kids who are now 11 and 14 and I just got back from WDW. It was a complete surprise for the kids. I booked it last Feb. and kept it a secret until were ready to leave for the airport.

The kids call me by my first name. My daughters call my husband StepGreg which is a term of endearment for them.

I teach kindergarten and when we have our fairytale unit, I always tell my kindergartners that I am a stepmom. My kinders love me and know I am kind so they are quite surprised to learn I am a stepmom. Then we talk on their level about stereotypes. Its a cool lesson and I enjoy it every year.

So YEAH! for all the Devoted Stepmoms in the world!

 

[CampbellScot]

Mrs.PrinceCharming!! I'm always so glad to hear from a fellow step parent. How cute that your kids call their stepdad "StepGreG"...I lOVE IT!! My step kids call me "MissCammie"...I was introduced that way to them when they were VERY small and their dad and I were just friends...they've never stopped calling me that and now it's just who I am...

We are in such an odd position as stepmothers...especially when we come into the children's lives when they are young. We are every bit a mother to them, and a necessary care giver as their biological mom. When they are little like that, they naturally look for a "mommy" type person. And the second you try to either "compete" or "act just like" their biological mom, you've lost it. I am definitely more strict than their mom. Their dad and I have different and probably more rules at our house. That's not good or bad, it just is. I'm a social worker and a behaviorist and it's just in my nature to be me. That certainly doesn't make me an ogre. (HOLLYB!) Strict or not, there I am at 3am when someone has wet their bed and is crying in my ear, running a bath and changing jammies and sheets, or somebody is so dehydrated that they need to be rushed to the ER for an IV (our first trip to my future in laws house! ) My step son held my hand and asked why I was wearing a shiney rock on my hand I told him that daddy gave it to me and he said very seriously "Daddy picked it out without US?!"

My step son was barely two when I met his dad. He does not remember a life without me. My step daughter was 5, she does remember when mom and dad lived together and she mourns that. But her life is her life and I can't change that for her, and parenting her out of guilt and making her believe that she can't be responsible for herself will only handicap her as an adult.

SOOO long story long...it's good to hear from another devoted step mom. It's a VERY rough job on the best of days...but we have the opportunity to be strong and positive role models in the lives of these kids...that and we get to practice our best "WICKED stepmother" laugh!!!!

 

[Mrs.PrinceCharming]

Thanks! We are in a unique position. My DH's kids live with us full time and their biological mom has visitation. So I am really in a position that not many people are in. I don't want to hijack the thread but I would love to have another step mom to talk to. Feel free send me a PM and I will give you my email.

 

[disneyfreak74]

My "attitude" was a joke as I said before...of course I don't mind carrying things for them, or feeding them whenever they ask for something, making sure they are hydrated at all times and covered in sun screen, I make sure that their food doesn't "touch" on the plate b/c they hate that. I do my step daughters hair in just the way she likes. I do all the things their mom does and "just as good a mom" I was told this morning by my step son who thinks this is a massive compliment.

Being a step parent is extremely difficult on the best days. If you aren't a step parent, you have no idea. You have to keep your humor about you at all times and you to have avoid allowing your step kids to take advantage of you, which is easy when you want to over indulge so they "like" you. I'm not sure why it would be a big deal to require your kids to have some responsibility for themselves. We are raising future adults here. Not giving them the idea that they can do things for themselves from time to time is handicapping them.

don't judge me if you haven't been in my shoes. I would have hoped people could see I was being sarcastic... see like that.

for those of you who got it...thanks!

Oh. . .I understood. . .I was sitting here thinking that at times my stepDD (11) rolls her eyes and thinks that I am evil. . you know. . .clean your room. . turn your socks. . .(I do not stick my fingers in dirty socks) But other than that we get along great. . .

As far as children carrying things. I tell DS7 and DD3 do you want to take your pen and autograph book? If the answer is YES, then they put on their fanny packs. OR they can "bargin" and trade Disney dollars and have the other keep up with their stuff

 

[CampbellScot]

Oh. . .I understood. . .I was sitting here thinking that at times my stepDD (11) rolls her eyes and thinks that I am evil. . you know. . .clean your room. . turn your socks. . .(I do not stick my fingers in dirty socks) But other than that we get along great. . .

As far as children carrying things. I tell DS7 and DD3 do you want to take your pen and autograph book? If the answer is YES, then they put on their fanny packs. OR they can "bargin" and trade Disney dollars and have the other keep up with their stuff

Yup pretty much how I feel about it...although...it seems that expecting children to have some responsibility makes you WICKED in the eyes of some Disers...oh well, call me wicked then, because I am not about to have some self centered, helpless kids in my house. Nope, no thanks. I'm not a housekeeper and I'm not a zoo keeper...but like I said...I'm WICKED!

 

[kellyg403]

Yes, it can be difficult with the stereotyping of being "the Wicked Stepmother" We have full custody of my 2 step dd's 13 and 15 since they were 8 and 10. Their mom gets visitation but utilizes 2 weeks in the summer only. She is the greatest mom of all time since during those two weeks she indulges and and there are no rules. I have bio kids and at their dad and stepmom's house they actually have MORE rules than here. So, there is probably no winning. Just doing the best we can. Treat everyone the same and hope that in the end they notice that in life there are rules and consequences and divorce and stepparents are not the cause of all the rules and consequences. My 13 yo dd (step) is the hardest case of all. Her mom still promises her the world but dd does not understand that when her mom is taking her medication she is probably the nicest person in the world. She chooses sometimes to not do that and then is not so nice.

As for the original question, my bio and step kids know the rules...you bring it you carry it. I have bought the athletic mesh bags for them. If they are empty when we head out, I fold them up and carry them. If they buy souvenires or something give them their bag and they carry for the rest of the day. So, I guess I am the meanest mom and the Wicked Stepmom all rolled into one!

Kelly

 

[CampbellScot]

Well Kelly, from one frequently mean and constantly Wicked stepmom to another, I hear you!!!

I'm glad that my step kids mom is so "present" in their lives. I'm glad she's not ill or doesn't care. Sometimes though it's hard b/c while we "try" to have universal rules, every once in a while she'll just go ahead and excuse her son kicking her and being totally and completely rude..saying no to her or spitting food onto his plate. She'll laugh and make it a joke. So then he comes over to our place and gives that a try and finds himself in Consequence Land. He actually spit food on to his plate one day (BIG No no...and GROSS) and when he was promptly removed from the table his response was "When I do that at mommy's I get different food.." yeah...well, not here pal! Then we get to go over the rules...AGAIN. It is uniquely complicated and frustrating in a way that non step parents would never be able to understand.

Anyhow... Thanks for the mesh bags idea...that might be good to b/c they are breathable and lightweight. I'm pretty sure one of two things will happen, they'll be delighted with new bags of any kind and get a kick out of hauling their stuff OR it will last about an hour before they start trying to see if I REALLY meant what I said about them carrying their own stuff!

I do believe though that the magic of being at Disney will be enough to keep them busy...they are funny to when they see other kids totally misbehaving in public b/c one or the other will look at me and say "WHY isn't that kid getting a time out yet?" or "You wouldn't never allow that would you?" So well trained! I've also taught my step daughter to keep an eye out for diet coke dispensers when we are out and about! She is GREAT at that! Being a step mom has it's advantages! (for those of you who are about to type snarky replys about how I use my step kids for slave labor, don't bother...they like it...it helps them earn time out of the dungeon I keep them locked in! )

this has been a VERY interesting and POSITIVE thread don't y'all think? For the most part?

We should start a Disney Step mom's club...wear special T-shirts with the Wicked Queen on them that say something like "Go ahead...Misbehave...I know know a Woodsman" or something like that!!!

 

[DBarber600]

If you're renting a stroller, just put everything into one backpack and set it on top of the sunshade/awning thing that comes out over the top of the kids head (it doesn't retract). I usually looped the strap around the handlebar as well - I have a messenger style backpack. The awning won't sag under the weight of the backpack either. Believe me, with all the chaos at WDW, it will be easier to keep track of one bag then trying to keep track of several bags.

The only time you'll have to carry the backpack is when you have to leave the stroller outside of a ride or restaurant. The strollers also have pretty good sized mesh pockets under the handlebar to hold drinks, maps, sunglasses, small bags, etc.

 

[bevtoy]

My boys used their gameboy "fanny packs." On the small side. Large enough for pins, autograph books, and any other trinkets or treasures found along the way.

Also big enough for a disposable camera. They loved carying those, and getting their own pics.

I don't pack mule for my kids either........it would make my trip miserable. There is no end to what they would want ME to to tote around. I get them belly bags and they tote their own stuff. Its amazing what they no longer "need" to take of they are responsible for carrying it.

 

[kellyg403]

I don't pack mule for my kids either........it would make my trip miserable. There is no end to what they would want ME to to tote around. I get them belly bags and they tote their own stuff. Its amazing what they no longer "need" to take of they are responsible for carrying it.

I agree 100%! Bio, step, MIL, mother whoever it may be, its my vacation too. I spent 100% of my time at home doing a whole bunch of responsible stuff. Carrying your own stuff while on vacation makes me feel LESS responsible for a minute or two. And that alone, makes my vacation that much more enjoyable!

Kelly

 

[CampbellScot]

I agree 100%! Bio, step, MIL, mother whoever it may be, its my vacation too. I spent 100% of my time at home doing a whole bunch of responsible stuff. Carrying your own stuff while on vacation makes me feel LESS responsible for a minute or two. And that alone, makes my vacation that much more enjoyable!

Kelly

That is exactly my point...we as parents do do do for our kids, step kids, grandkids, ALL THE TIME. Asking an a 8 year old and 5 year old to haul their own autograph books is NOT going to kill them by any means...and it's not just THEIR vacation. It's mine too. My husband pointed this out when I was agonizing over which hotel to pick. I kept thinking that the kids would love the themes at PoP or ASMo..but I really loathe the value resorts. They are just so loud and I am an extremely light sleeper and etc...but I wanted my step kids to have an amazing time. My husband said to me..."Cam, they will be soaked in Disney all day at the parks...the resort is YOUR part of the vacation! He's right...I'm entitled to my share of the Disney magic!

It's funny...when I was small, if we went on vacation to...MiddleofNowhere USA to see the biggest ball of TWINE, my job was to be glad we were taken on vacation...to complain was unthinkable...we were on vacation, what am I going to fuss about? My dad liked to camp and water ski...guess what most of my childhood vacations were? Yup...camping and water skiing. I'm not sure that kiddos nowadays have any clue how much time and money and planning goes into Disney vacations...they just expect it and more. Makes me sad, but I certainly won't stomach it from my step kids.

when you give them everything, they value nothing.

 

[mommiepoppins]

Hi all!! We are heading to the World in August and this time my step kids are coming along...due the fact that I am extremely Wicked in the Step mothering arena AND my s-kids are going to be 8 and 5...I feel they should pack their own dang autograph books around! So does anyone have any suggestions for kid friendly bags that are light weight, not backpacks (too HOT in August for BP's and this would lead to whining and possibly the death of one or both children...I'm wicked like I said...don't judge... ) Just something they can carry easily that would fit an autograph book and a pen and maybe a trinket or two? We will rent a double stroller b/c as I mentioned before, whining of any kind could be deadly and WDW is a LOT of walking and Hey, I might need a ride myself!

These are kids that pretty overindulged in at least one half of their life and they have this aversion to "carrying" anything. This aversion makes me nuts and I'm tackling it NOW so when it's time for Disney we won't be all shocked at having responsibility of our own...

SO to recap...smallish, not too bulky or backpacky...manageable for kids.

thanks y'all!!!

I hope there mother dose not read this

 

[CampbellScot]

I hope there mother dose not read this

Why? Because I would ask them to carry their own things? Or because I would require them not to whine? Or is it that I might actually be a murderous wicked person who would intend to end the lives of young children in my care? Whatevs...don't judge...read through this whole post and you will see that the vast majority of people who have read this not only "understood" the sarcasm involved but actually agreed that teaching children personal responsibility is not a bad thing but an important thing.

"THEIR" mother would get a kick out of it...spelled t-h-e-i-r...not there...just because I'm so wicked!

 

[mommiepoppins]

Why? Because I would ask them to carry their own things? Or because I would require them not to whine? Or is it that I might actually be a murderous wicked person who would intend to end the lives of young children in my care? Whatevs...don't judge...read through this whole post and you will see that the vast majority of people who have read this not only "understood" the sarcasm involved but actually agreed that teaching children personal responsibility is not a bad thing but an important thing.

"THEIR" mother would get a kick out of it...spelled t-h-e-i-r...not there...just because I'm so wicked!

you need to get out more ... That is MORE... I would hate if you were my step parent . You must have taken things wrong. get over it!!!!!!

 

[disneyjunkie]

Why? Because I would ask them to carry their own things? Or because I would require them not to whine? Or is it that I might actually be a murderous wicked person who would intend to end the lives of young children in my care? Whatevs...don't judge...read through this whole post and you will see that the vast majority of people who have read this not only "understood" the sarcasm involved but actually agreed that teaching children personal responsibility is not a bad thing but an important thing.

"THEIR" mother would get a kick out of it...spelled t-h-e-i-r...not there...just because I'm so wicked!

You are not requiring anything that any normal, leveled headed parent would require.

I've been a DISer for long time. There have been tons of threads on the DIS requesting info about the perfect bag for kids to carry around the parks. This is the first one I've seen take an ugly turn.

 

[CampbellScot]

Thanks Disney Junkie...I try not to let people saying hateful things bother me. I think mommiepoppins was annoyed because I corrected her spelling...

As I've said before, I love these kids, they love me. If I require them to live up to certain standards it is because I love them and want them to see that they are not helpless. Divorce can take that away from children...especially when parents begin giving in to every demand out of guilt. That only handicaps them.

I'm GLAD I'm their step mom...so is THEIR mom.