just need to whine for a minute about income

[jrmasm]

To clear this up, YES, she will be getting her pictures taken with the team, I just won't be buying them or the individual pictures that whomever takes, as I can take them and print a package myself for cheaper.

And there are people that chose not to get their child's picture taken, and I never had a problem with it. It didn't bother me in the least.

You should still buy the team picture.

 

[surfergirl602]

First I'd like to say I'm sorry your hormonal

I have to agree with the pp's. You assumed alot and really should have confirmed you'd be taking the pics before you went out and purchased anything. I hope that you wouldn't exclude your dd from the group team pic over this, but I can understand not wanting to pay for someone else to take her individual pic.
Also, I wouldn't assume anything about why you weren't asked, just call the coach and ask if you really want to know. Is it typical for a coach to make the decision on who takes pictures? Maybe he was instructed to find someone else because of budget reason. etc. You'll never know unless you ask and you will do yourself (and your family ) no good stewing over it when you are already hormonal

I haven't purchased anything. I just found a new printing company that has some pretty cool online templates.

 

[m&m's mom]

I know you say your "Modified bed rest" is not a big deal but I cannot imagine you would be on it if your Dr did not think it was necessary.
I was on bed rest too and was overly cautious vs not taking it too seriously.

Our team pictures photographers were up and down on their feet all day long getting the kids pictures since we take individual and also team photos.
I am not trying to be so negative but why should your husband talk to the coach about pictures YOU are/were doing? If you want to show you are professional enough to be the photographer, then you need to show you can handle negotiations.

 

[Amy8888]

I am sorry you are going through this. I do remember a similar hormone-inspired vent of yours a few weeks ago and I ask this in the most gentle way possible...have you spoken with your doctor about all the sadness and "hormones" you are experiencing? I only ask because I was extremely emotional during my first pregnancy and finally broke down in the doctor's office. I had gone off of my trusty Paxil when I got pregnant and the doctor immediately prescribed me Zoloft. It helped for the remainder of my pregnancy and after my girl was born.

I hope you feel better soon.

 

[surfergirl602]

I am not picking on you. You are having a pity party without contacting the coach to find out what is really happening. You are having a premature pity party. I am just suggesting you actually go find out the details before you assume everything is the worst. You say you don't want to find out because you are afraid he won't take care of your dogs. Well, take that risk and ask. You may be pleasantly surprise. If not, it can't be any worse than what you are assuming happened.

Do you absolutely know for sure somebody else is contracted to do the pictures on April 1?

If not, then yes, you are assuming way too much. You are assuming that somebody else is doing them and may miss out on a job.

Calling the coach and inquiring if you are doing the pictures on April 1 based on past history doesn't seem to be out of line.

If you do know that somebody else is doing the pictures, calling the coach and asking why they chose to go a different route, not making it confrontational, but wanting to know how to improve your business, is not out of line and just plain good business sense.

You say you are there at least 2x per week. If you are such a good friend with coach, you should be able to walk up to him and say "Hey, what's up with the pictures?"

If he is such a good friend, he won't refuse to watch your dogs just because you asked.

It is far better to know the truth than to sit and assume and have to vent on something you are not even completely sure about.

Oh, and not allowing your daughter to have her pictures taken by the team photographer - that is akin to taking your ball and leaving when you don't get your way. I am sure you are better than that.

The reason I hesitate to just walk up to him and ask, is because I'm not a confrontational person like that. He's suffering from PTSD right now and has a lot of anger management issues going on, so I truly try to avoid any type of conflict with him. His kids and wife are having a really rough time with him right now, and I don't want to make things worse. I know that's not a great excuse, but he's had three deployments and things aren't very good for him right now. I'd rather not bring up any issues that might just piss him off.

Why would I pay for someone else to have my daughter's picture taken?!? It's not a requirement of playing a sport. There are lots of parents that choose not to have their child's picture taken, but they are in the team photo. I choose not to have it done, just like other parents will choose to not have it done either. I don't see anything wrong with that.

 

[happygirl]

The reason I hesitate to just walk up to him and ask, is because I'm not a confrontational person like that. He's suffering from PTSD right now and has a lot of anger management issues going on, so I truly try to avoid any type of conflict with him. His kids and wife are having a really rough time with him right now, and I don't want to make things worse. I know that's not a great excuse, but he's had three deployments and things aren't very good for him right now. I'd rather not bring up any issues that might just piss him off.

Why would I pay for someone else to have my daughter's picture taken?!? It's not a requirement of playing a sport. There are lots of parents that choose not to have their child's picture taken, but they are in the team photo. I choose not to have it done, just like other parents will choose to not have it done either. I don't see anything wrong with that.

If the bold part is true he doesn't need to be coaching. I see a lot wrong with not wanting to have your daughter photo taken

 

[surfergirl602]

I am sorry you are going through this. I do remember a similar hormone-inspired vent of yours a few weeks ago and I ask this in the most gentle way possible...have you spoken with your doctor about all the sadness and "hormones" you are experiencing? I only ask because I was extremely emotional during my first pregnancy and finally broke down in the doctor's office. I had gone off of my trusty Paxil when I got pregnant and the doctor immediately prescribed me Zoloft. It helped for the remainder of my pregnancy and after my girl was born.

I hope you feel better soon.

I'm always very hormonal near the end of my pregnancies. I'm just a moody person to begin with, I guess! Bless my dear husband for putting up with me. Yes, I've talked to my doc about it, but I'm not crying or anything, no PPD, and he doesn't feel I need any meds, and I'd rather stay away from them. They just seem to mess me up even more most of the time. I just like to blame my moodiness on being pregnant, I guess. I don't know. The past few weeks have been very stressful, I guess, and I've allowed it to get the best of me.

Time to go fold laundry.

Thanks for letting me vent everybody. Bye! ::

 

[happygirl]

I'm always very hormonal near the end of my pregnancies. I'm just a moody person to begin with, I guess! Bless my dear husband for putting up with me. Yes, I've talked to my doc about it, but I'm not crying or anything, I just like to blame my moodiness on being pregnant, I guess. I don't know. The past few weeks have been very stressful, I guess, and I've allowed it to get the best of me.

Time to go fold laundry.

Thanks for letting me vent everybody. Bye! ::

I hope you feel better

 

[surfergirl602]

If the bold part is true he doesn't need to be coaching. I see a lot wrong with not wanting to have your daughter photo taken

Yes, its true. All coaching is strictly voluntary, they do not get paid, and being in therapy on a military base doesn't disqualify you from being a volunteer, or a coach, etc. It's kind of weird, I know, but he's REALLY good with all the kids, is a great coach to them, and is a different person when he coaches.

To be a coach, all you do is go down to the registration office, fill out a background check done by the MP's, and get a team. It's quite simple, really.

 

[surfergirl602]

I hope you feel better

Thanks - putting on New Moon. A bit of vampire drama will make anyone feel better.

 

[luvmy3]

I haven't purchased anything. I just found a new printing company that has some pretty cool online templates.

Sorry, I misunderdstood. At least you aren't out any money

 

[Mickey's Minion]

deleted - covered while typing

 

[piglet too]

Are you 100% that you are not doing it? I understand that you were not asked about the date, but there could be a communication mix up. You need to make sure, that way come April 1 they are not waiting on you to show up.

 

[jrmasm]

The reason I hesitate to just walk up to him and ask, is because I'm not a confrontational person like that. He's suffering from PTSD right now and has a lot of anger management issues going on, so I truly try to avoid any type of conflict with him. His kids and wife are having a really rough time with him right now, and I don't want to make things worse. I know that's not a great excuse, but he's had three deployments and things aren't very good for him right now. I'd rather not bring up any issues that might just piss him off.

Why would I pay for someone else to have my daughter's picture taken?!? It's not a requirement of playing a sport. There are lots of parents that choose not to have their child's picture taken, but they are in the team photo. I choose not to have it done, just like other parents will choose to not have it done either. I don't see anything wrong with that.

Wow. It's interesting to me that you didn't say your daughter doesn't want a team picture if you don't take it.

It's not all about you. Buy the team picture.

 

[Eeyore'sthebest]

Wow. It's interesting to me that you didn't say your daughter doesn't want a team picture if you don't take it.

It's not all about you. Buy the team picture.

I don't buy the team photo for my DD. I used to buy the dance team photos but realized that my DD didn't care about those - her words, not mine.

Why should the OP buy a group photo if she doesn't want it? I'm sure as a photographer she is constantly taking photos.

 

[disykat]

Personally, I would have assumed "modified bed rest" meant you would not be taking the pictures. I'm guessing your friend did not want you to feel you had to do it.

 

[jrmasm]

I don't buy the team photo for my DD. I used to buy the dance team photos but realized that my DD didn't care about those - her words, not mine.

Why should the OP buy a group photo if she doesn't want it? I'm sure as a photographer she is constantly taking photos.

She didn't say her daughter didn't want it. She said she wouldn't buy it because she wasn't taking the pictures. But I'm sure the story will change now.

 

[happygirl]

She didn't say her daughter didn't want it. She said she wouldn't buy it because she wasn't taking the pictures. But I'm sure the story will change now.

I got the impression it was because she was mad about not taking the photos herself,

 

[allison443]

OP sorry for the stress you're going through!

Just a thought about the pictures-my dh ran a kids sports league, they had photos taken every year. The photographer they used gave a certain percentage back to the league. Were you doing that? If they switched to someone else, maybe they gave them a better deal?

If he didn't ask you due to your pregnancy, it sounds like it was out of concern for you. I don't think there's anything wrong with asking him why. That way you'll know if you can count on jobs in the future from the other teams, or if he has someone new.

 

[DisneyJules]

I just feel like some people see me as a handicap and not a human being with feelings right now. Hormonal feelings, yes, but I still would have liked to be given the opportunity either way, I guess, and not just overlooked because I having a baby. It just seems discriminatory to me somehow.

Do you know this as fact? Sometimes it's just SO easy to assume things, I know because I do it all the time But I'm often so off base. Communication in these situations is so important and can avoid a lot of guess work.