Just about ready to cry -- Teacher is a blabbermouth!

[Zeebs]

I am sorry, but i do not think that one lapse in memory means that there is some kind of bigger problem with a teacher. Perhaps someone else in the class has a trip and she forgot who was going when, and which one was a surprse? Teachers really do have a LOT on their plate and keeping a secret from one child is not tops on the list. Things like the child in the class that may be an abuse case, the one that is not getting fed, or the one that is basically raising his/herself and making sure they all get an education despite everything else that is going on are far more important than remembering that Johnny's disney trip is supposed to be a suprise. Believe me there are far worse things out there to be upset about. OP just be glad that you are all gonig to Disney, and give yourself a break!It doesn't have to be the perfect suprise to be a a wonderful trip.

I agree, I also think that maybe it was just noted in the childs notes that she will be away as I would have thought if the teacher had been told of a surprise WDW holiday she wouldn't have asked where they were going on their trip.

I have two kids, I forget heaps of stuff pertaining to them, have people giving the teacher grief never forgotten something?

Kirsten

 

[disney*mom*82]

My DH and I both are teachers and have been asked to keep secrets like this several times and we never have a problem with it. I think it should not be that hard for any teacher to not discuss it or spill the beans with the child, especially if the parent says this is a surprise. I hope your DD doesnt catch on and Im sure you did a great job covering it up. Yes, teachers have a lot to deal with, but thats no excuess, its not that hard to remember that the child isnt suppose to know about the trip.

Also, the teacher who said that you should only tell a teacher a week or less in advance. I can see that if you are going to be gone while school is going to be on break, but if not, then I do give more like 2-3 weeks notice that way the teachers can prepare their work and we can get it done and returned before we leave. I told DDs teachers last week, got her work this past Tuesday and hope to turn it in by Wed cause we leave on Fri.

I think this will be a great surprise for your girls and a well needed vacation for you and DH. I hope the girls dont find out until there, but maybe prepare in case they do find out prior. I hope you have a great trip!

 

[daisyduck123]

Also, the teacher who said that you should only tell a teacher a week or less in advance. I can see that if you are going to be gone while school is going to be on break, but if not, then I do give more like 2-3 weeks notice that way the teachers can prepare their work and we can get it done and returned before we leave.

Just want to add....I would never expect my children's teachers to take the time to gather work ahead of time just so my kids can have it to do while/or before they go on vacation.

In my county, our policy is that the students will receive their missed work when they return from their absence.

 

[mjkacmom]

Well - first I agree teachers have a ton to remember. My wife's a teacher, so I'm very aware of all the 'stuff' they have to do. I disagree with most of the rest of your statement, though. First, our school requires an alternate learning experience plan be filled out and turned in as soon as you know you're going to be missing school - and if we did so 1 week in advance, that would be WAY too short of a notice. It wouldn't be approved in time. Second, the fact that one (or two or ten) of the children are being taken out for vacation may be trivial to the teacher, but that doesn't mean she should disregard it.

In the teacher's defense - everyone makes mistakes. I'm sure that's exactly what happened. Depending on the level of effort to get in touch with the teacher (OP indicated she has been trying for a couple of weeks to contact her) - if the teacher didn't get back in touch, I think that's the bigger issue.

Normally I'm 100% pro-teacher in all situations, but in this case - I understand the OP's frustration.

By the way - we're doing the same thing. We leave in 11 days and it's a surprise. Luckily, my wife works at our kids' school - so she regularly reminds their teachers it is a surprise...

Keep in mind, different schools have different policies. Most of our teachers don't give any work ahead of time - it all has to be made up when the children return. The OP said this is a sub, someone she's been trying to get in touch with regarding this issue. Maybe the sub had no idea it was a surprise? Even if she did, it is easy to forget. I understand not wanting to ruin the surprise - we surprised our kids - but I think in most situations like this, someone messes up.

 

[ckrum]

"Idiot teacher" here, so reader beware
Give the teacher a break. She's even a sub after all.
I have 40 students and more than twice that many parents, step-parents, ex's, grandparent caregivers, etc... to keep straight. I would feel terrible if I accidentally "spilled the beans". But, my super human idiot teacher powers sometimes fail me.
Relax and have a great trip! Sounds like you've had a heck of a year and this trip is just what you need. Just remember to enjoy the moment even if it doesn't go just how you've planned it.

 

[bwilcox]

We all need a vacation. That's no excuse for rudeness.

 

[npmommie]

You are under SO much stress.

And keeping this secret, lying to your kids (that you don't have the money, etc)...that's just adding another layer of stress, causing you to send a "screaming" email to a substitute teacher.

I would spring the surprise NOW. If you don't want to let them know you weren't telling them the truth, just make it seem that the teacher's mixup gave you guys a great idea, and let's go NOW!

There's no reason to put such stress on this trip. So drop part of the stress by letting them in on it. They won't be disappointed to find out now; they'll just be excited that they are going!

I completely agree with this!
Let them in on it, do it in a special way if you want, but do it now!
I really think a lot of the fun is the anticipation of going to Disney,let them have that excitement of thinking about it anticipating it, looking forward to it.

 

[design_mom]

I would never expect my children's teachers to take the time to gather work ahead of time just so my kids can have it to do while/or before they go on vacation. In my county, our policy is that the students will receive their missed work when they return from their absence.

The policy in our school district is that if it's an "approved absence" like an illness or an approved 'alternate learning experience,' the child must have the opportunity to make up the work when he/she returns. However, there's no policy *against* teachers giving work early.

I would never *expect* a teacher to provide work early, but I always ask. It makes a smoother transition back to school for my child if he's "where he needs to be" when he returns, and I would assume that it's smoother for the teacher, too.

Some teachers have said that they don't plan the week's lessons till the weekend before (which is too late to give the homework before we leave)... and that's fine. But if they *are* able to give it, it's helpful to me and I always try to give them several weeks' notice so they have time to gather the work if they are able to.

To the OP - I am sorry that your surprise was almost ruined. I agree with some of the previous posters that you have had a rough year and that adding the "surprise" element to your trip might be adding to your stress. (I personally wouldn't like it so much if someone surprised me with a trip. Anticipation is half the fun.) I think you were a little harsh to the sub. I am sure her slip up was unintentional. Perhaps a little "reminder" note that the kids don't know about the trip would be in order... but a "screaming" e-mail seems out of line.

Either way, I hope you have a great trip and, surprise or not, I hope you have a great/relaxing/rejuvenating time as a family.

 

[Disneyrsh]

.

 

[ShannonMB]

We even had to tell gymnastics because there is a big meet that was scheduled after we planned our trip and DD won't be in it! (OT - but total bummer as this is the last year she can do this meet due to the age limit and our team won the whole thing last year!)

Does your DD know she's missing the meet? I think my DD would kill me if I made her miss something like that, even for a surprise Disney trip.

 

[Hannathy]

Does your DD know she's missing the meet? I think my DD would kill me if I made her miss something like that, even for a surprise Disney trip.

I know my DD would have hid at the neighbors if we tried to get her to miss a dance recital!, Disney or Not. Especially if it were her last one

 

[momtosam]

Next time consider taking your family when the school year is over.

 

[miknminniesfriend]

It sounds like the teacher may not have known yet that she was supposed to keep a surprise? As a teacher, I hope that most would try to keep a surprise like that safe. Idiot sounds harsh.
It sounds like you were just very upset that the surprise may have been messed up, which is understandable. Remember though, if they do find out...it is not a terrible thing, just makes the planning a little different. If the surprise comes a little early (from the teacher or another way) don't fret. You can still have an awesome trip. You would just change gears at that point and include the kids in the planning.
I hope your family has a wonderful trip.

 

[WeLoveLilo05]

The same thing happened to me (as a student teacher).

A little boy in my class was going to FL, my co-op teacher told me he was going away to Disney (Jersey Week, so Nov.) they left the day after parent teacher conferences and his mom tells me at the conference that the disney part (they were going to disney for 2 days) was a surprise....well I had no idea, Co-op teacher NEVER told me it was a surprise, as a matter of fact she told me they were going to Disney for the whole week. And here I am, sitting on the bleachers with him during gym (he couldn't play he broke his collar bone poor thing asking him what rides he's going on at Disney.
I felt so bad....but really, I had no idea, and the little guy just kept telling me which rides he was going on, he never said that he wasn't going to Disney.

 

[sk!mom]

If you wanted it to remain a secret then you should not have told anyone. We surprised DD with a trip when she was a 3rd grader. I didn't tell her teacher at all. It was planned over a long week-end and we pulled her from school for 2 and a half days.

The surprise factor seems to be adding more stress to you. In all honesty, it flopped with my DD and I'll never do it again. She enjoys the vacation planning and anticipation as much as I do and I now realize that the "surprise" was selfish and for DH and I. DD would have rather known ahead of time.

We're planning a surprise vacation for this August but DD13 will receive the surprise on her birthday, 2 months before the trip. We haven't told her yet because things aren't definite but once we tell her she can then have the summer to anticipate and help plan. By the way, no one knows what we're planning except for DH, DS, and I.

 

[ash-n-brensmom]

First of all, take a deep breath...it's okay, crisis averted. Don't blame the teacher, this kind of thing happens. But, I think the way you reacted shows that you might be taking alot on with it being a surprise. I don't blame you for the surprise element, we are doing the same thing for our girls next month and they have NO idea. But, I don't have nearly as much stress surrounding me as you do right now.
So, take a deep breath.....try to relax, and before you send out any more emails to anyone...take a moment, think, reflect, how would you feel if you had someone call you out on a mistake? How would you prefer that person speak to you about it? Then write the email, then stop again and re read it...maybe take a couple of hours and read it again before you send it. If you are satisfied then send it.
In the long run, it really won't ruin the trip if they find out..the surprise is just one element of a wonderful family adventure...it will still be amazing...

 

[EKW]

I'm a teacher and I took April 30th, 2001 off to register my older son for Kindergarten. The sub, a complete nutter obviously, announced to my class of 3rd graders that I was in the hospital having a baby.

Way to go, idiot!

My class didn't even know I was pregnant! I have strong feelings about the line teachers need to walk. My students all know I'm a huge Disney fan, for example. I have Disney themed items in the room, photos of my family at the parks, etc. Do students need to be brought into private issues such as engagements and pregnancies? No. Public life. Private life. Keep them separate!

Anyway, I went back to work on the 1st and had a LOVELY mess to clean up. Letters of apologies to parents, etc. I went to work on the 2nd, stayed through the end of the state testing session despite the fact that I was in labor, and then went to the hospital.

To top off that insanity, the secretary then told parents what hospital I was at! I had 21 hours of labor followed by a C-section. Less than 24 hours later, there I sat in my hospital gown and in walks a mom and her two kids...who had missed the entire prior week with Rosiola (sp?). I've often thought that I should have sued the school district...and the hospital...over that one. Talk about lack of privacy!

BTW...as a teacher, if you want something to be a secret, let me and know and we'll be good to go. BUT...if you don't tell me anything about your plans, and if you are the type who teases your kid by saying, "We're going on a trip Saturday, and we'll spend 3 hours on the airplane...", when your kid interrupts class because all he/she can think about is where you're going, I'm gonna say, "DUDE! You're going to Disney!!!" Then, at recess, I'll clue your kid in to all the cool things to look forward to, lol!

 

[Leajess99]

I have not read any other response yet so this may have been covered but with so much going on why are you adding more stress by lying and covering this trip up?? It would make them very excited and the joy may help ease sone of the stress. Honestly think about this. You want to keep this a secret and in doing so you choose to lie to the kids. How do you think that makes them feel when they find out?? Also, let them help plan what they want to do on this trip and you will get so much more joy from it.

I'm sorry for all that you have been through and my prayers for your family.

 

[*pixie*dust*]

OP, I am sorry that you have had a rough year. Stress can really be overwhelming. But honestly, you were out of line. You owe the teacher an apology, it's just a vacation. Yes, it is something very important to you but you handled this all wrong.

 

[MissNurse]

I understand why you got so upset w/ the teacher. I am doing a surprise trip for my kids, too, and if I had to let the teacher in on it (we are going over Spring Break, so we're not missing any class) I would have been crushed to know she blew the big surprise. We have had kind of a crummy year, too, and this is something that I know I can do for my kids that they will appreciate. It makes ME feel good to make them shreik with joy and jump up and down. My kids know we are going, but they think it's not until June, so I don't have to keep it a complete secret. I am so looking forward to seeing their faces when we tell them we are going early. It'll be like a Christmas morning type of thing. I don't think the teacher did anything wrong either. She made a mistake. We all do that, but I still think being upset is completely valid. I am sure she never meant to blow your surprise. Surprises for the kids are usually as much fun (or more!)for the parents. I hope your trip is a wonderful surprise and I truly hope you have a great time!!!!