Thursday, 7-21-05
So far this morning I have had a sf pudding and a splenda diet coke. I packed my lunch, so that is set.
I really think I am going to be going home for the afternoon - I feel wretched and need to get more sleep. I only came in because one of my coworkers (also reports to the STB) gave two weeks notice yesterday and STB is all in a twitter about it...and I simply had to be here to enjoy it. We're all in positions that should probably give more than 2 weeks, and I know my job is going to get bigger for a while to compensate until she's replaced, but for the moment, I am just going to enjoy her dilemma.
Plus, my coworker leaves the second week STB is out of the country, so her last week will be excellent!
Here's hoping for a good day. My review is coming up soon, but I refuse to get worried about it. I know what kind of job I am doing. I have faith in myself. And to be honest, STB is not someone whose opinion matters a whole heckuva lot to me (I don't have much respect for her). So I shall go in, get my average rating and my little raise (although every little bit is appreciated), remind myself that I am not an average employee - I just have a cheap boss - and go from there.
Thank goodness for this journal. I was thinking...so much of what I write has nothing to do with eating, but yet it really does. I am NOT binging and I am NOT cheating because I am writing. So, as always, thank you for your indulgence.
Had my lunch at work - toasted lc bread, 1/2 avocado, mayo, sundried tomato turkey, sharp cheddar, 2 pieces bacon. Yum!
I am now at home. I am so tired and my throat hurts and I just need to be here, in bed, instead of at work. I am going to call in tomorrow as well. I need the rest. I emailed home about 15 SO's to do, as well as some other mini projects and I'll work on them and not miss anything while I'm gone.
Sorry for whining!
Interesting challenge at lunch...it's the Safety Fair today and they brought in Famous Dave's to cater lunch. Now, normally I may or may not have had any (they did have plain roasted chicken and that would have been okay) but no matter what, I would have gotten in the mood for it and would have encouraged DH to take us there for dinner tonight. Maybe it's good I don't feel well because I'm not the slightest bit tempted. A victory!
snack: small bowl of lc chocolate toffee ice cream, sandwich sized pepperoni slices (not together

)
Well...my day's wrap up. Not worse than I thought, but not a great weight loss day. But considering what I could have done, it was good.
snacks: 2 oz cheese, another smaller bowl of lc butter pecan.
dinner: DH went out and got me a bacon cheeseburger from Hardee's...burger, cheese, bacon, lettuce, some tomato, mayo. I took it off the bad bun and swapped it with an lc one. I also asked DH to get me the jalapeno strips. I looked up the nutrition info online, and it was 36 grams. I made the decision to have an indulgence. And then Dh ate a bunch of them, so it decreased the count a bit.
All in all, probably about 30-35 grams more than a normal diet day. But you know what? If I wasn't watching my carbs today it would have been MUCH higher. I am proud of myself. I ate a lot and it was very emotional eating...I didn't really want the snacks, but felt "I should eat it". However, I didn't binge at any one time and I didn't purge. I could have gone off my diet and filled myself with sugar - and felt all the repercussions that go with that. As well as having to struggle to get back.
This was a good strategy for today.