JULY 25TH PART ONE: STRAP ON YOUR CROCS 'CAUSE IT'S ABOUT TO GET CRAZY UP IN HERE
On this beautiful Sunday morning, I took my time getting out of bed. I took a bubble bath, ordered a delicious room service breakfast, sat on the patio wearing a fuzzy bathrobe sharing my fabulous self with the world and
Oh, who am I kidding? None of this happened. NONE.
Today was the day we were going to MGM (yes, I still call it MGM. Im retro
err stubborn like that. Deal with it.

) and as you all know, if you want to ride Toy Story Mania a sufficient (ie: more than once) amount of times, you have to get there early.
So I peeled myself out of bed at the crack of dawn, took a shower while simultaneously shoving a Mickey Rice Crispy Treat down my throat, and took a huge chunk out of my leg while shaving because apparently using a razor while still sort of sleeping doesnt lead to good things. Ive gotta remember that for next time.
But my suffering was worth it, because we were at the bus stop by 8:00. Way to go, us! We didnt have to wait very long before the bus showed up which was good because I was about three seconds away from falling back asleep. But this was our first Disney bus ride of the trip, so I was excited. Yes, Disney buses make me ridiculously excited. And yes, I *am* actually four years old. This whole being a busy college student thing is just a charade. But seriously, riding Disney buses always makes me happy. I know a lot of people hate them and I can definitely understand why. I mean, they are often really slow. And crowded. And sometimes you wind up with a giant lump on the side of your head after riding them. Oh, have I not shared that story yet? Its a good one.
Two summers ago, we were staying at the Wilderness Lodge, so we were taking the bus to Epcot one evening for our dinner reservations at the Biergarten. On our way to Epcot, we had to stop at Ft. Wilderness to pick more people up there. So were chillin on the bus, pulling up to the Ft. Wilderness bus stop, doing normal bus things, when all of a sudden my life flashed before my eyes. I just happened to be staring out the front window of the bus as we were about to pass through the little security gate thingamobs that all of the resorts have. The gate raised normally, but just as we started to pull through, it fell back down. Instead of just driving through and taking the gate with us, our bus driver slammed on the brakes and people went flying. Literally. Because we were seconds away from pulling into the Ft. Wilderness stop, a family was already standing up and preparing to disembark. As soon as the driver hit the brakes, they were all on the ground. Luckily, no one was hurt.
As for me, Katie and I had been sitting in the sideways seats. Yknow which ones Im talking about, right? The ones that face towards the aisle? I dont know what theyre actually called. As we came to a screeching halt, we both went flying towards the front of the bus. Katie landed on top of me, and the whole left side of my body made contact with one of the metal poles. The brunt of the contact was of the head to metal pole variety. It was not fun.
So basically everyone on the bus has either fallen onto the floor or smashed their head on something and what does the bus driver do? Stops the bus and physically checks to see that were all ok? Gets on her radio and informs her boss that shes a terrible driver? Nope. Over the speaker, without even turning around to look at us, she goes, Everything ok? Um, no, bus driver, everything is not ok. The fact that there are PEOPLE ON THE FLOOR seems to indicate that. But everyone on the bus kind of mumbled a Were not dying, so I guess were ok response and she took off to pick up some more people. Frankly, if I was staying at Ft. Wilderness and was heading for Epcot, I would have waited for the next bus. I mean, we were close enough to the stop that the people waiting saw the whole thing. But some crazy people boarded the bus of terror and then we continued on to Epcot. For the rest of the ride, we paid really close attention to this womans driving skills. Let me just say that they were not good. I remember looking at my parents and giving them an OH MY GOD WERE ALL GONNA DIE look because I was pretty sure this woman was going to drive us off the side of the road and we were going to go bus off-roading through the swampy undeveloped areas of Disney property or something. It was nuts. But we arrived at Epcot safe and sound.
Except for the rapidly growing lump on the side of my head.
It lasted the rest of the week. I usually sleep on my left side, but I couldnt because putting pressure on it was super uncomfortable. Looking back, we probably should have filed a report or something because A)this bus driver was scary and B)I might have had a minor concussion. I mean, I dont really know what the concussion symptoms are, but I was conscious the entire time and my vision was fine, my head was just sore. So I didnt automatically jump to OMG CONCUSSION. Plus, who were we even supposed to contact? I feel like if we had shown up at Guest Services at Epcot and been like WE WERE JUST IN A BUS ACCIDENT, they would have looked at us like crazy people who were trying to scam Disney. I always read those reports of people who blame Disney for everything and then demand some sort of ridiculous compensation. Like, if a mosquito bites them, theyre at the front desk demanding a free vacation. Its insane. And I definitely didnt want to be one of those people. I wasnt in need of medical attention, so whatever. It was just a fluke accident. Plus, I was really hungry and I didnt want to miss our ADR. Except once we got to the Biergarten, I quickly learned that eating was gonna be quite the challenge. I couldnt chew anything because it hurt too much. All I wound up eating was the potato and leek soup and tons of pudding. But yeah, it just makes me laugh when people are all OMG. THERE IS A PIECE OF LINT ON THE BED. I
DEMAND A REFUND when I was actually injured at the hands of Disney, and didnt do anything about it. Being at Disney World was enough compensation for me, thank you very much.
Anyway, back to my love for Disney buses
Theyre so wonderful, and air conditioned, and relaxing, and air conditioned, and some of the bus drivers are really entertaining, and did I mention theyre air conditioned? Getting into a car thats been sitting in the hot sun for hours is not fun. I will gladly wait a few extra minutes if it means I dont have to worry about burning myself on my seatbelt. Plus, riding the buses is a really weird bonding experience. Its neat to share that its-insanely-early-and-Im-on-summer-vacation-but-its-still-time-to-get-our-butts-to-the-park feeling with everyone else. Everyones putting on their sunscreen and discussing what rides they want to hit first
It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy on the inside. On Jimmy Fallons show, he does this bit called Shared Experiences where he makes the audience members bond by experiencing something together. One time, they tried out all sorts of infomercial products. Or during the World Cup, they all blew vuvuzelas. Its always funny watching a bunch of people do something so random in unison. Gosh, this is such a tangent, but Im pretty much the queen of tangents (technically, Im the princess, but when the queen dies, Im next in line) so whatever. Riding the bus is my Disney version of a Shared Experience.
We got to MGM by 8:30. The bag check wasnt as thorough as it was at Epcot the day before, THANK GOD, so it didnt take very long. I was also able to smuggle in a bunch of illegal drugs, 3 rifles, and a live chicken, which are all totally necessary for an enjoyable day at MGM. They hadnt opened the turnstiles yet, so we picked the one with the fewest people and got in line. I think there were like 10 people in front of us.
I took this picture as further proof of my theory that the sky is always more blue over MGM.
Seriously, look at the blue-ness. Its crazy. If I didnt know any better, Id think that Disney constantly pumps magic blue pellets into the air to dye the sky that shade of blue.
OMG. Maybe they do that! Next time Im there Im gonna have to keep an eye out for blue dye pellet launchers.
While we were waiting, people from the American Idol Experience were out begging for auditioners
errr pumping up the crowd. Somehow they convinced a family a couple rows over from us to sing a song for everyone. I dont remember what they sang, but it was pretty funny. It definitely made the time pass more quickly.
Eventually we were let into the park and the Pre-Toy Story Mania Madness began. Everyone made a mad dash to be the first people behind the rope. It was crazy. Our plan was to get Toy Story FPs for everyone before riding ourselves, while Mom and Katie rode the Tower of Terror. So after we got into the park, Dad and I took everyones tickets and headed into the ALL HELLS ABOUT TO BREAK LOOSE crowd. We were probably 5 people back from the rope and we were packed in tightly. I could already tell that this was going to be quite the mad rush. There was just this feeling of STRAP ON YOUR CROCS CAUSE ITS ABOUT TO GET CRAZY UP IN HERE in the air. It was weird. And unsettling. And really funny.
I guess this is the part where I should mention that I find it absolutely hilarious whenever large groups of people do something stupid in unison. The running of the bulls? Hilarious. Those flash mob dance videos that were all over
youtube a while back? Hilarious. People doing the wave at sporting events? Hilarious. In fact, Im notorious for laughing so hard I cry whenever it breaks out. So its obvious that I find the Toy Story Mania hysteria absolutely hysterical. I mean, the ride is amazing, but is it that amazing that we all need to collectively lose our minds in our haste to get there? I think thats still up for debate.
While the MGM Welcome Show was going on and everyone else was tossing their bambinos in the air while yelling Hollywood, here we come! I was stretching and getting my head in the game because, as we all know, theme parks are serious business and I needed to be in the right frame of mind. I psyched myself up. But still, as a precaution, I told Dad that he needed to find my trip report notes in my suitcase and write up this report for me once he got home in case I didnt make it in the madness. I mean, I was feeling pretty confident in my abilities, but Ive seen those darn strollers take down some of the best.
Seconds before the rope was dropped, I said a quick prayer to the frozen head of Walt Disney and before I knew it, the hypothetical shot gun (or maybe it was literal
I mean, I did sneak in a few rifles

) had been fired and we were off to the races.
(Quick note: These pictures dont really capture the speed at which we were moving. It was crazy)
Everything went pretty smoothly for the first leg of the race. There was no blood. There were no bodies strewn about the pavement. But when we hit the Animation Arch thingy, all hell broke loose.
Instead of using the bigger arch, everyone was trying to cram through the smaller one and it was a disaster. It was a giant bottleneck of people and there was pushing and shoving. Kids were crying. Parents were crying. You could hear cries of OH DEAR GOD NO and WHYYYYYY??? Literally. I actually heard people screaming these things. Like I said before, apparently theme parks are serious business.
Being the Disney savvy people we are, Dad and I passed by the stupid people who were inexplicably still trying to shove themselves through the smaller arch and joined the smart people in going under the larger arch. I will never understand why more people didnt do that. I mean, its two steps to your right! Why bother with all of the pushing and shoving?
So, we rounded the bend and headed down the home stretch.
Instead of using the bigger arch, everyone was trying to cram through the smaller one and it was a disaster. It was a giant bottleneck of people and there was pushing and shoving. Kids were crying. Parents were crying. You could hear cries of OH DEAR GOD NO and WHYYYYYY??? Literally. I actually heard people screaming these things. Like I said before, apparently theme parks are serious business.
Being the Disney savvy people we are, Dad and I passed by the stupid people who were inexplicably still trying to shove themselves through the smaller arch and joined the smart people in going under the larger arch. I will never understand why more people didnt do that. I mean, its two steps to your right! Why bother with all of the pushing and shoving?
So, we rounded the bend and headed down the home stretch.
At one point I said to Dad something along the lines about how this was the best workout I had gotten in a long time and the lady on the other side of me made a funny remark about how she trained all year for this. It made me laugh. And wonder if she was a DISer. I bet she was.
As per the plan, Dad and I headed right for the FastPass machines. Heres where things quickly headed south. There were maybe 3 people in line ahead of us, but because it wasnt exactly 9:00 yet, the machines werent turned on. So we had to stand there and wait as hundreds of people passed by us and headed into the ride. It was annoying. We were all prepared to take a quick detour, grab the FPs, and jump into the line before things got too out of hand, but that didnt work out as quickly as we planned. And then, of course, things got worse. Once the FP machines were turned on, we learned that the very first person in our line (and the one next to us) was a tour guide with 50 tickets to put into the machine.
GRRRRREEEEEEEAAAAAAATTTTTT.
People were pissed. There was a CM standing near the entrance to the FP machines clearly stating that all of the tour guides were supposed to use a specified machine so that things like this wouldnt happen, but did these two ladies listen? Nope. So we stood there for what seemed like FOREVER waiting for this woman to put 50 freaking tickets through the machine. For a second, I thought there was going to be a mutiny. It felt like at any moment, the woman in front of us and a guy in the line next to us, who had bonded in their anger, were about to run up there, tackle the tour guides, and stick their tickets in the machine. People were yelling at the tour guides to hurry up and muttering all sorts of WHY DIDNT THESE PEOPLE LISTEN? remarks. It was crazy.
Dad and I didnt let the whole situation bother us too much. We kinda just laughed it off. Of course, I was also rolling my eyes and quietly making sarcastic remarks, but rolling my eyes and making sarcastic remarks is normal behavior for me. But we werent about to get all worked up about it. Sure, we were going to be waiting a little longer for the ride, but its not the end of the world. I save all of my ANGERED and OUTRAGED behavior for moments when its really necessary. Like when the CW canceled Everwood for another season of 7th Heaven. I sent many a strongly worded e-mail/letter during that fiasco. Really, CW, the SERIES FINALE of 7th Heaven got surprisingly high ratings, so all of a sudden its time to dump Everwood and bring back 7th Heaven? Really? You dont think that ONLY REASON that episode of 7th Heaven got high ratings was because it was the SERIES FINALE? That most people ONLY tuned in to see the LAST EPISODE? But whatever, lets just cancel a show that still has a story left to tell so that we can bring back this DINOSAUR of a show that has already been on for about SIX SEASONS too many.
Deep breaths, Kara. Deep breaths.
As you can see, I still have very strong feelings about this issue. I see the letters C and W and I fill up with rage. Until I started watching the Vampire Diaries a few months ago, I hadnt watched the CW in years out of spite. Darn you, Paul Wesley, for being all hot and attractive and sucking (no pun intended) me into that show. Your flawlessness has made me abandon all of my principles. But its totally worth it because the Vampire Diaries is amazing. But I will refrain from any further gushing because yall probably dont watch and/or care about it. Except for Lia.
AAAAAAND back to Disney
After we FINALLY got our FPs (for 10:20), we decided to head over and find out exactly how long the wait for TSM was. As you can see, it wasnt as bad as we feared, so we got in line.
Here begins the onslaught of pictures I took in the queue. I love it in there. The older I get (not that twenty is all that old) the more I realize that nostalgia is my absolute favorite thing ever. I will sit in front of the TV for hours whenever VH1 re-runs I Love the ____ marathons. My itunes account is 50% cheesy 90s music. In fact, as I type this, S Club 7s Bring It All Back is playing. A couple weeks ago, I bought an NSYNC concert t-shirt on Ebay because I dont know what happened to mine and I just needed to have one. The Big Ten just announced the new divisions for the expanded conference, and upon hearing that one of the divisions is going to be called the Legends Division I immediately considered writing a letter to the Big Ten asking them to consider a few mascot changes to better fit the Legends theme. I mean, the University of Michigan Blue Barracudas? The Northwestern Purple Parrots? The Michigan State Green Monkeys? And then, at the end of the season, whichever team wins the division not only gets a trophy, they also get a new pair of Sketchers and a trip to Space Camp. Itd be perfect.
So yeah, I love nostalgia. I love reminiscing. The second I step into the Toy Story queue, I feel like Im in nostalgia heaven.
A K for Kara. I cant help but feel that they put that in there *just* for me. I mean, I am a pretty important person so
I dont have (I say have because I still have mine stored in the closet with the rest of my childhood) bendy pieces for my Tinker Toys, but I wish I did because that guitar looks awesome.
My foot pointing at Ohio/Lake Erie/The general vicinity of Cleveland. A girls gotta represent. The people around me probably thought I was nuts because I was seriously jumping up and down going DAD! DAD! Its Cleveland! Ah, I have to take a picture! I thought about lying down on the floor so that I could get my head in the picture, but that would have been way too complicated, so I settled for my foot.
I love these kid-like paintings of the characters. Bullseye is too adorable. OMG.
I never noticed it before this trip, but the safety sign is stapled onto the wall. So cute.
This combination of Christmas lights and Tinker Toys makes me so happy. Someday, when Im rich, there is going to be a room in my mansion constructed entirely of giant Tinker Toys and Christmas lights. It will be fabulous. You are all invited to come and visit, of course!
We finally boarded the ride after an exactly 30 minute wait (I timed it) and I was really excited. I really do love Toy Story Mania. I mean, I mock all of the hysteria, but I can totally understand why people are so crazy about it. Its just so much fun. The second the car zips off from the loading area and into the actual ride, I start giggling and I dont stop until the ride is over. When Woody, Jessie, Buzz, and the gang first pop up in the practice round, I always get the biggest smile on my face. Yall know my feelings about the Toy Story franchise (If not, see my PTR
Or just ask and Ill ramble on about it). In my opinion, Toy Story 3 was the movie of the year. Im reaaaalllly hoping it gets an Oscar nomination for Best Picture. I have no doubt that itll be nominated for (and win) Best Animated Film, but it was just brilliant and absolutely deserves a Best Picture nomination. Heck, I think it deserves a Best Picture win, but I doubt thatll happen. Anyway, I have such an attachment to these guys, so getting to play with them for a few minutes is a dream come true.
Plus, I come from quite the competitive family, so its definitely fun in that regard. We always try to beat each other. Or at least Dad and I try to beat each other. Mom and Katie are really easy to beat. LOL. But yeah, Dad and I get really into it. By the end of the ride, our arms are about to fall off, but its totally worth it.
On this particular occasion, I beat Dad! It wasnt by much, but a win is a win. He was all My accuracy is way better but I still had the higher score, I win - you lose, so suck it!
And with that, I think I'll stop here. The next update is already almost finished, so I'll have it posted sometime next week. I'm
really going to try to update this thing on a weekly basis from now on. I've gotta make more room for the DIS in my life. I miss it!
Finally, in the words of NSYNC,
MERRY CHRISTMAS, HAPPY HOLIDAYS!
I hope Santa brings you everything you asked for.

I also hope that you eat dozens of cookies so that I can feel better about myself for not being the only person to do just that. I think I've already eaten about a dozen today. This does not bode well for the next couple days.
