Is this school "punishment" acceptable?

[DisneyLovingMama]

DD's teacher writes the children's names on the board when they have misbehaved. She then leaves the names on the board, after class ends so the parents can see who's name is on the board. You can get your name on the board for something as little as not raising your hand to speak or as big as hitting another child with a broom handle.

My Mom, who is a teacher, thinks this puishment is absolutely horrid. Every time I talk to her, she tells me how bad it is. I never really thought about it.

However, today, DD's name was on the board (for not raising her hand) and she feels horrible. She keeps comparing herself to the other child (broom handle hitter) and says she never wants to go to school again because she is BAD. She went to bed an hour early, after refusing to eat any dinner.

I told her that I wasn't upset and she wasn't bad and on and on. I had actually gotten some flowers today from the grocery store, so I gave them to her because she was having a "bad day" (her words, not mine). That didn't even cheer her up.

So, is it the punishment, or my DD?

 

[paigevz]

Never would be allowed in my school. It's called "public ridicule" or "shaming". Very bad for the children's self esteem, and not really that effective (a kid who hits kids with broom handles isnt' really going to care if his name is on the board, and a kid who gets her name on the board for not raising her hand doesn't need it).

How old is your child? I question the "raising hand" for most ages, too. If we want true participation, we take the ideas as they come...........

I teach second grade, btw..............

 

[clh2]

Not a teacher here, just a mom.

I never feel it is appropriate to have a public display of anything negative in school, whether it is grades, behavior etc. It is not my business if "Johnny" misbehaves. Nor is it someone else's parents business if my DD misbehaves.

How would the teacher like it if anything bad that was in their annual performance review was posted for all to see?

JMHO!

 

[MAKmom]

Tell the teacher that you have a sensitive child & not to put her name on the board. I've had to let teachers know that DD9 & DD11 die a thousand death if they even get in a little trouble at school ( not at home...they could careless)

Tell DD you will tell the teacher not to do that again.

 

[RobinMarie]

I don't think this punishment can be very effective. Any child who seeks attention will probably do something to get their name in 'lights' or, in this case, the board. For anyone else, it's humiliation for mistakes not malicious, harmful, misbehavior.

 

[paigevz]

Just wanted to add, not only will we not post a child's misbehavior, we will not call attention to it in class either..........there are a number of ways to let a child know you know what he's doing and to stop it.......some teachers use signs, code words, little notes. I myself use proximity control. I walk closer to that child, and, if need be, rest my hand on their shoulder. That's usually all it takes.

A hitter has to be removed from teh room of course, and then I would talk with that child in the hall, privately, me to that child. It's much more effective.........removes their "audience" and lets them really listen.

Also, wanted to add that not only is it not others' business how children other than theirs behave, we are absolutely not allowed to discuss that AT ALL with parents.

If I have two kids who have a conflict, I can talk to one mother about what happened (leaving the other child's name out) and what we did with her child, but no matter how many times she asks, I can not talk about what punishment the other child received. This often incenses parents...............

 

[Daxx]

Kdg. teacher here -- I'm wondering if your child has the opportunity to get her name off the board for improved behavior? Is the teacher doing this as a reminder to those who didn't follow the rules to follow them? I would hope that your child's teacher offers the opportunity to get their name off the board.

I don't do this in my classroom, as my students are learning proper classroom behavior and can learn from others mistakes as opposed to listing those who made mistakes.

Some teachers in my school have a Super Student list on their chalkboard, which has turned getting your name up on the board into a "positive" thing. Their theory is to reward for positive behaviors, like using good manners, being helpful to another student, paying attention, etc.

In DS's school, they have a whole "honey grams" thing -- they all have bees w/their name on it. Each bee goes on a hive. As long as you behave, your bee stays in the hive. Any time you are caught doing something proper by any teacher (manners, raising your hand, proper cafeteria behavior, etc.), you are given a "honey gram" (slip of paper). You put your name on the honey gram and put it into a box in your classroom. At the end of the week, a couple of winners are drawn from the honey gram box. They get a small trinket type prize. However, if you behave improperly (name calling, no manners, rudeness), you can get a "stinger". One stinger means that a note goes home. Two stingers means principal visit. The third stinger earns you detention. Do not ask about 4th stinger ... I have no idea. Thankfully, DS has not brought home a stinger. And, no, you cannot earn your stinger off the board. The stinger lasts the entire week, so if you're not behaving, you can easily rack up 3 stingers in one day!!!!

Wondering what your thoughts are on those techniques? Are they any better/worse than the name on the board for being bad!?

 

[disykat]

I don't think it's a good way or even appropriate, and I don't employ it myself, however I would find it "acceptable" in most circumstances. This was an accepted practice for many many years and I don't think anyone died from it. I think the right to privacy in these circumstances is a relatively new concept - and it could be argued that if you knowingly broke the rules you gave up your right to privacy.

If my child was upset about their name on the board, I'd tell them not to do whatever it was that got their name up there anymore. I might wonder why the teacher isn't using more up to date methods and it might lower my opinion of him/her slightly, but it wouldn't make me want to run in to the school and demand change.

 

[pearlieq]

Wow - this was standard practice when I was in elementary school. You could even get a circle or check on your name if you kept misbehaving.

I guess we never took it that seriously. It wasn't any huge shame to get your name on the board--it happened all the time. Thinking back, though, the whole ritual does seem kind of pointless.

 

[daisyduck123]

This was an accepted practice for many many years and I don't think anyone died from it.

How true!!

Any good teacher goes over her entire Behavior Plan (rules/rewards/consequences) on Day 1 & refers back to them throughout the year. Students are aware of the consequences & if a student chooses to break a rule, resulting in his/her name being put on the board for a warning or whatever, then I agree with it.


And it can be effective...I know if my DS8 ever had his name put on the board...it would never happen again (he would hate that)...thus, the discipline plan would be effective.

 

[laura001]

DD's teacher writes the children's names on the board when they have misbehaved. She then leaves the names on the board, after class ends so the parents can see who's name is on the board. You can get your name on the board for something as little as not raising your hand to speak or as big as hitting another child with a broom handle.

My Mom, who is a teacher, thinks this puishment is absolutely horrid. Every time I talk to her, she tells me how bad it is. I never really thought about it.

However, today, DD's name was on the board (for not raising her hand) and she feels horrible. She keeps comparing herself to the other child (broom handle hitter) and says she never wants to go to school again because she is BAD. She went to bed an hour early, after refusing to eat any dinner.

I told her that I wasn't upset and she wasn't bad and on and on. I had actually gotten some flowers today from the grocery store, so I gave them to her because she was having a "bad day" (her words, not mine). That didn't even cheer her up.

So, is it the punishment, or my DD?

All this is is "shaming" and is absolutely WRONG!!!! I have learned a lot over the past couple of years regarding this matter and can barely stand to hear about it when it happens to someone's child. I wish that people in authority, especially over children could experience it first hand themselves, perhaps then they would change how they treat others.

 

[laura001]

This was an accepted practice for many many years and I don't think anyone died from it.

Perhaps no one died from this but how many children were adversely affected by this practise? It would be impossible to measure, but there has to be a better way of dealing with things other than "shaming" someone or "making them feel small" in some way.

 

[JVL1018]

In DD's calss they have a board with all the kids names and a clear pocket that has a square of green paper in each..if the child misbehaves they get a yellow..then an orange and then a red.
It is up there for all to see and I see no problem with it(not that we [parents]normally see inside the classroom anyway).
I have asked DD from time to time if anyone gets off green and she says no one ever has, so I assume they are for big time issues, as her K teacher is pretty strict and i have seen her be very strict with misbehaving children when I am volunteering in class.

I don't think it's a big deal.

My daughter came out of school last week looking very sad and telling me she had a bad day because Mrs. ___ spoke sharply to her.
She told me she asked DD 3 times to turn around(she was turned around straddling her chair talking to a friend during snack) and that after the 3rd time "the room got all blurry"(tears in her eyes)..I felt so bad for her..but I also told her that if she had listened the first time her teacher would not have reprimanded her. That I know she's a good girl, and her teacher does too, but she has to follow the rules

If you don't want to get in trouble, do what you are supposed to do, if not take the consequences, even at 6 years old.

 

[tiggersmom2]

When my oldest son was younger his first grade teacher did this. He did have his name on the board a few times.....this form of punishment never bothered me or him (it actually encouraged him not to misbehave imo) but I guess everyone is different.

 

[MouseWorshipin]

The kids know the rules and the consequences for breaking them. They are SUPPOSED to feel bad - that's the point. Then, they won't do it again.

My name was always on the board in school. I talked too much to the girl next to me. Take it from me, it won't scar her for life. But it may teach her to raise her hand before she starts talking.

 

[daisyduck123]

I don't think it's a big deal.

My daughter came out of school last week looking very sad and telling me she had a bad day because Mrs. ___ spoke sharply to her.
She told me she asked DD 3 times to turn around(she was turned around straddling her chair talking to a friend during snack) and that after the 3rd time "the room got all blurry"(tears in her eyes)..I felt so bad for her..but I also told her that if she had listened the first time her teacher would not have reprimanded her. That I know she's a good girl, and her teacher does too, but she has to follow the rules

If you don't want to get in trouble, do what you are supposed to do, if not take the consequences, even at 6 years old.

Well said!
Way to be supportive!!
It's too bad there are not more parents like you!!!

 

[aprilgail2]

They do this at my daughters school too...I don't have a problem with it at all....my daughter had her name on the board ONCE...it upset her so much to have it up there that she has made sure she didn't do anything to have it up there again. They get their name up there three times in one day they go to the principal...each day is a new day, the names are gone at the end of the day and they start fresh the next day. Of course there is the 2 or 3 kids who's names are up on that board EVERY day, it doesn't matter to them. They also have the Nick Lunch board..they get stickers for doing things well and once their chart is filled up they get to have lunch in the classroom with the teacher and watch Nickolodeon on TV.

 

[Grumpy's Gal]

DD's teacher writes the children's names on the board when they have misbehaved. She then leaves the names on the board, after class ends so the parents can see who's name is on the board. You can get your name on the board for something as little as not raising your hand to speak or as big as hitting another child with a broom handle.

They did this when I was in school and I'm sure it's more common than you think. I know lots of schools do this.

 

[KarenB]

Take me back to college days but isn't this from the Cantor(sp) style of discipline? We discussed this type of discipline quite a bit and it was "said" to be very effective. About five years ago when I took this course it was even said to be one of the best as long as the rules and consequences were discussed and understood from the beginning. While I don't use it in my classroom, I do know many that have used this approach.

 

[daisyduck123]

Take me back to college days but isn't this from the Cantor(sp) style of discipline? We discussed this type of discipline quite a bit and it was "said" to be very effective. About five years ago when I took this course it was even said to be one of the best as long as the rules and consequences were discussed and understood from the beginning. While I don't use it in my classroom, I do know many that have used this approach.

Yes...it's called Lee Canter's Assertive Discipline...I learned it 20 years ago in college.