Is this a tacky thing to do at a baby shower?

[mefordis]

She still IS writing the thank you cards................

True. And I wasn't necessarily offended. No, it's more like I thought it was an unclassy thing to do. The whole thing came off like "Thank you card writing is such a pain in the butt, could you pleeeeaaase help me by addressing these envelopes???" <<< whiny voice

I had a shower for #1 and if I had one for #2, which is on it's way, I would not allow this to happen at my shower

 

[pansmermaidzlagoon]

put me down for this being tacky!

I was pregnant once - yeah I was busy, but how long does it take to address envelopes!? You sit down one night in front of the TV and do it...not that big a deal. I think it is kinda rude to ask your guests to fill out their own envelopes - what's next?

I wouldn't be "offended", but I would not think highly of it either.

 

[alizesmom]

Yes, I think it's tacky. If a woman has time to write thank you notes, then she can take an extra 2 minutes and address the envelope herself.

Well you are all going to hate me. I personally despise thank you cards from a shower. If the recipient thanked the giver in person that should be enough. A gift is meant as just that, a gift. Karen

 

[mefordis]

The first shower where they did this, I thought it was tacky. I have since changed my mind - it's a good way for the shower hostess / friend to help out the mother-to-be when it is clearly a busy / stressful time in her life. Plus the mom might not have everyone's addresses. It doesn't take anything away from the meaning of a thank you note.

Denae

Okay, the stressful time is once the baby comes out. The mom to be should get those cards done BEFORE the birth of the child. There is 6 weeks (in this case) before this happens.

 

[Beth76]

Plus the mom might not have everyone's addresses.

If she doesn't have the addresses then she has no business inviting those people to the shower.

Okay, the stressful time is once the baby comes out. The mom to be should get those cards done BEFORE the birth of the child. There is 6 weeks (in this case) before this happens.

I agree. Pre-baby time is not stressful. You should have plenty of time to address those notes (I would even be ok with a printed out label). If you don't have the time, then you invited too many people to your shower. If you want all the gifts you have to take the "stress" of writing the thank-you notes to go with them.

 

[crzyred]

I have been to several showers that have done this. They usually then have a "drawing" with the envelopes and give a larger door prize to whoevers envelope is drawn. I don't thing it is that uncommon in some areas.

Every baby shower I've been to this is how we've done it. Even when I hosted one for my best friend, I didn't think twice about it. It also helps because some of them that RSVP'ed did not end up coming, so I then didn't have to keep track from my list of addresses who was there and who wasn't.

We played a few games, also, including those.

 

[Thats_for_Shore]

I really don't let the small stuff get to me. If we lived in a perfect world, a lot of things would bother me.

Since this isn't a perfect world, I don't expect anyone living in it to be perfect, either.

 

[chrissyt27]

I think its fine. I never mind doing it. I had two bridal showers and I was very grateful that his mom did this. She has 10-12 gifts to give away for envelopes that they pulled as “winners.” I really didn’t want a big shower, but his whole family is 4 hours away and she really wanted to throw it and invite everyone. I suggested we not do it and she insisted. The shower was the first time I met a lot of the cousins and her sisters. It was helpful for me to connect the envelopes with the people who were there, luckily someone wrote down gifts as I opened them down. There were even gifts from people who weren’t there. I wrote everyone a really nice thank you card and had them out in a week. I was so afraid I would write wonderful to meet you and that person not been there.

We didn’t do it at the one my bridesmaids threw me. I agree it was just as easy for me to address the envelopes, but every shower I have been to does this.

 

[meandtheguys2]

I think it is a great idea thought of by people that want to make life easier for a mom-to-be. I love how some see it like hazings...if i went thru it and survived everyone else should too!

Looking for reasons to be offended by the same person you are wanting to bless is just weird to me.

 

[pansmermaidzlagoon]

tongue in cheek , of course - but I am sure the mom to be has a list of things to get done in the next few weeks!!!! Why don't we have her bring along some laundry to be folded and a multitude of other chores to be checked off that list....why not just fill out our own thank you notes entirely while we are at it? Heck - as long as they are "rewarded/bribed" with "prizes", why not.....

why...because that turns into an entirely different thing than a party where the guests and the mom are there to have fun and celebrate the new arrival.......it is a party!!!!!

again, tongue in cheek - but I am ducking!!!!

 

[ericamanda01]

I never heard of that before, but I have to say that I think it's a great idea!

 

[Ever_After]

It's common here and I think it's so tacky! My sister was going to do this at my shower and I pleaded and begged her not to do it. I was horrified by the thought of it being done at my shower. She didn't see the big deal but gave in.

Also, my mom addressed her own envelope at a baby shower and still didn't get a thank you card!! Nice

 

[azgal81]

I think it's a great idea.

 

[MareQ]

Personally - I think it's a great idea to have people address envelopes. Anybody that gets their knickers in a twist over doing something to make a person's life just a tiny bit easier should just refuse to address their card.

 

[Ariel Wanna-be]

Yep, I think it's tacky, but I certainly wouldn't be offended by it. I probably would not think of it again after I left the shower.

Being the OCD freak that I am, I addressed the "thank you" envelopes before my showers. Of course, I only did that for people that I *knew* were coming. That way, there were less envelopes to address afterwards!

 

[Handbag Lady]

I think it is tacky to do it AT the shower in front of the mom or bride-to be.

I don't think it is tacky to gather the addresses and help out the future mom/wife so that she has a list and can write them in her own handwriting at a later time.

I think that if you were mailed the invite to the shower, the host/ess should already have the addresses. If there is an unexpected guest or gift, the host/ess should be clever enough to discreetly gather the address for a thank you.

My reason: having the envelopes like that puts stress on the gift-getter to write them quickly. She should be able to do them in her own time, when she can, so that her thank-yous are properly thought out. I assume someone puts a lot of thought into buying a gift; the least I can do is put some thought into the thank you.

And yes, I know others are not as militant about this as I am and I'm okay with that!!!

For our wedding, DH and I had a spreadsheet of gifts, giver, addresses, and how we used/planned to use the gift. We had nice thank you's to send out and wanted to be good about it.

 

[AKL_Megs]

I've done this before, no big deal to me.

It saves the mom-to-be hours and takes all of us only seconds.

... And then you'll be sure to get a thank you. I've been to MANY showers and have gotten NO thank you note. I might start including my own self addressed envelope along with the gift.

I'm all for it.

 

[antmaril]

My niece's baby shower was December 9th. We each addressed an envelope for the thank you card and, yes, I think it's tacky.

The thing is I'm still waiting for the thank you note!!

 

[meandtheguys2]

Why go to a shower for someone if that is the way you feel about them? My attendance and gifts are signs of care for someone else. Turning around and ragging on them for something insignificant is tacky, in my book.

 

[ZephyrHawk]

Yes, it is tacky. Sure, the mom to be has a lot to do. So do new brides. So does everyone. Thank you notes are about taking your valuable time to thank someone. The guests probably could have used $50 on something for themselves or their homes or their own children, but they bought baby clothes for the mom to be instead. The guests might have had laundry to do, or pets to take to the vet, or wanted to spend time with their kids...but they went to the mom to be's shower to honor her and her unborn.

In other words, take the extra 30 seconds to handwrite your own envelopes.