PA Princess
DIS Veteran
- Joined
- Oct 28, 2002
- Messages
- 1,177
We are another household who does not believe in Santa, and that is what we have shared with out kids (currently ages 14, 13, 8, and 4). Dh and I made this decision before having kids, and it was initially a big controversy in both of our families.
My mother feared we would ruin Christmas, but today she is the biggest advocate of our approach you ever want to meet! Christmas is still magical in our home, but Santa does not generate that.
Like many have shared, our celebration centers on the birth of Christ, family, giving, serving, and loving. We do give our children gifts (3 each) and we have had a birthday cake for Christmas. We treat Santa like any fictional character.
We have not had any issues with our kids telling anything to others until this year. The director of my 8 year old's dance school spoke to us about our dd telling others she did not believe in Santa.
We were told that a group of kids was asking others if Santa was real. DD said nothing until asked directly (she told us this and her teacher confirmed without prompting). Keep in mind dd is the youngest in the class - others are all 9, 10, and 11. And the bottom line issue is that the director's 10 year old is in that class.
We re-emphasized to dd that she should be respectful of other people's belief's and she should try to avoid the Santa conversations in the future. We told her not to lie, but she could demure by responding that Santa is fun, etc. This is the most I can and will do.
I am bothered by parents IRL and on the DIS that express such forceful opinions about children who believe different about Santa. Is it my child's job to make your child believe in Santa? If your child is old enough to be asking, then they must be old enough to hear a variety of responses.
I understand about teaching beliefs you hold sacred, but in no way shape or form am I relying on the collective "you" to reinforce my personal religious beliefs. As a parent I am preparing my child for encounters with different beliefs and thoughts.
Consider a similar scenario where my dd had a conversation in dance class and she asked another if they believed in God and the answer was no, would I be up in arms with that child and the parents? Of course not, we would handle that in our home with our daughter. Why do parents who value the Santa tradition so much not do the same?
My mother feared we would ruin Christmas, but today she is the biggest advocate of our approach you ever want to meet! Christmas is still magical in our home, but Santa does not generate that.
Like many have shared, our celebration centers on the birth of Christ, family, giving, serving, and loving. We do give our children gifts (3 each) and we have had a birthday cake for Christmas. We treat Santa like any fictional character.
We have not had any issues with our kids telling anything to others until this year. The director of my 8 year old's dance school spoke to us about our dd telling others she did not believe in Santa.
We were told that a group of kids was asking others if Santa was real. DD said nothing until asked directly (she told us this and her teacher confirmed without prompting). Keep in mind dd is the youngest in the class - others are all 9, 10, and 11. And the bottom line issue is that the director's 10 year old is in that class.
We re-emphasized to dd that she should be respectful of other people's belief's and she should try to avoid the Santa conversations in the future. We told her not to lie, but she could demure by responding that Santa is fun, etc. This is the most I can and will do.
I am bothered by parents IRL and on the DIS that express such forceful opinions about children who believe different about Santa. Is it my child's job to make your child believe in Santa? If your child is old enough to be asking, then they must be old enough to hear a variety of responses.
I understand about teaching beliefs you hold sacred, but in no way shape or form am I relying on the collective "you" to reinforce my personal religious beliefs. As a parent I am preparing my child for encounters with different beliefs and thoughts.
Consider a similar scenario where my dd had a conversation in dance class and she asked another if they believed in God and the answer was no, would I be up in arms with that child and the parents? Of course not, we would handle that in our home with our daughter. Why do parents who value the Santa tradition so much not do the same?