Is being gay a lifestyle choice?

[Freyja]

Why do people say that they "approve/disapprove" of people who choose to live a gay or lesbian LIFESTYLE?

Do people really believe that it is a lifestyle and something people choose?

In my opinion your are born gay, lesbian, hetro, bi or anything inbetween. It is not something your conciously choose, but something you are, from the very core of your inner being.

I´d love to hear your opinion on this,

 

[tworkit]

Lifestyle choice!

 

[Beth76]

It doesn't matter to me. I don't think it's a choice, but even if it were, why does it bother anyone that someone else made that choice?

 

[icebrat001]

It is NOT a choice.

 

[Sparx]

It is not a choice.

do you know what makes someone gay?

It is teh way that you react to pheramones. A lesbian woman reacts to another woman's pheremones like a man would.

It is chemical.

It is NOT a choice.

Do you chose to be straight?
no

so you can't chose to be gay.

Youre born that way.

 

[Miss Jasmine]

No! And my reasoning is...for those who are heterosexual...could you make yourself be with someone of the same sex?

 

[Alice's Mom]

No it's not a choice in the same way I didn't choose to be heterosexual, I just am.

 

[Freyja]

Lifestyle choice!

Well, I assume you are straight. Right?
Then you must have chosen to be straight, according to your own comment!
Which means, that it only takes a change of mind for you to be gay.

 

[FreshTressa]

I think it is like a spectrum with strictly gay people on one end and strictly heterosexual people on the other end.

For people on the ends of the spectrum, it is NOT a choice. But I believe there are people in the middle that could go either way and do have a choice. Many of those people are bi.

I know people that have switched over, both directions, and some switched back again. Making a connection with someone sometimes goes deeper than what gender they are.

I think lots of people that consider themselves heterosexual have expiremented and enjoy gay sex. I think a lot of people that are gay went through part of their lives enjoying straight sex.

I don't think it is as cut and dried as straight/gay for a lot of people.

There are others though, for whom it is clear what they are, and for them, there is no choice.

 

[luvmydogs]

No, it is not a choice; and in this day and age I can't believe some people still use this line of BS as justification for their own prejudices.

 

[ashjohnson80]

I don't beleive it is a choice. I think you are either straight, or gay, or bisexual or whatever, But I definately don't think you choose to be. I didn't wake up one day and say you know what, I'm going to be straight. I just am.

 

[Freyja]

I think lots of people that consider themselves heterosexual have expiremented and enjoy gay sex. I think a lot of people that are gay went through part of their lives enjoying straight sex.

Just want to point out that it is not just about sex, although that it part of it, as in any relationship. It is about attraction and love for another human being.

 

[debster812]

NOT a choice. I think if you were to ask 100 gay or lesbian people (kind of like a Family Fued question ). Their answer to you, would be, "WHY would I CHOOSE this lifestyle?" They are mocked, ridiculed, harrassed and worse, all because of who they love.

 

[krcit]

I believe that you are born gay, or straight for that matter. I don't think it is a choice at all.

 

[Crankyshank]

For those that are truly homosexual I do not feel as though it is a choice. I believe it is something genetic that determines sexual orientation.

I think some people choose to be gay for a variety of reasons (experimentation, abuse, fed up with the opposite sex, to be shocking, etc..) just like some gay people choose to be straight despite the fact it is completely against their nature.

 

[tworkit]

Well, I assume you are straight. Right?
Then you must have chosen to be straight, according to your own comment!
Which means, that it only takes a change of mind for you to be gay.

Nope you incorrect in your assumptions. We were created to be man with wife. That is inate in us. If you choose to live a lifestyle different than that it is a choice. Like it or lump it that is how I see it. It's the persons life and they should live it how they want.

 

[LJC1861]

I am a lesbian and I can assure you that it is not a choice. I tried to live the life that everyone expected me to live....to the point of being engaged to a man and planning a wedding. Ultimately, I just couldn't do it. As difficult as it was to come out, to myself, to my family and my friends it was totally liberating to finally be living MY life.

My partner and I have been together for 5 years...and will be forever. I have found my soul mate in Lisa and have never been happier.

As to the choice....why would anyone CHOOSE to be discriminated against, to have to look around before you hold your Honey's hand in public, to be treated differently in the eyes of those collecting taxes, to be denied family medical insurance plans for your partner, to have to mark the spot that reads 'single' on forms because you are not legally married and there is no spot that says 'domestic partner', to be looked at differently when you request a king sized bed when checking into a hotel and there are two women's names on the reservation,.....I could go on and on.

I am truly blessed to have found acceptance in my life. My parents adore my partner and she adores them. I could not ask for anything more. We live in Asheville NC, which is a very accepting place with a large gay and lesbian community. I am out at work and it is not an issue. We have a large circle of friends who are a wonderful support system. We have found a wonderful family doctor....who happens to be a lesbian herself. All in all, life is truly good.

Linda

 

[Freyja]

I am a lesbian and I can assure you that it is not a choice. I tried to live the life that everyone expected me to live....to the point of being engaged to a man and planning a wedding. Ultimately, I just couldn't do it. As difficult as it was to come out, to myself, to my family and my friends it was totally liberating to finally be living MY life.

My partner and I have been together for 5 years...and will be forever. I have found my soul mate in Lisa and have never been happier.

As to the choice....why would anyone CHOOSE to be discriminated against, to have to look around before you hold your Honey's hand in public, to be treated differently in the eyes of those collecting taxes, to be denied family medical insurance plans for your partner, to have to mark the spot that reads 'single' on forms because you are not legally married and there is no spot that says 'domestic partner', to be looked at differently when you request a king sized bed when checking into a hotel and there are two women's names on the reservation,.....I could go on and on.

I am truly blessed to have found acceptance in my life. My parents adore my partner and she adores them. I could not ask for anything more. We live in Asheville NC, which is a very accepting place with a large gay and lesbian community. I am out at work and it is not an issue. We have a large circle of friends who are a wonderful support system. We have found a wonderful family doctor....who happens to be a lesbian herself. All in all, life is truly good.

Linda

It is beyond my ability to comprehend why someone would choose such discrimination. I am glad that you have found your soulmate and the acceptance of your family and friends.

 

[simpilotswife]

I also believe that you are born that way.

A gay male friend of mine once told me that he had a crush on the guy who played Don West in the TV series "Lost in Space". He would have been about 8 yrs old at that time.

I can't imagine an 8 yr old choosing to "like" boys over girls. It just seems to me that there must be some type of genetic component involved for a child to be having those kinds of feelings.

 

[swea_pea1]

Linda,

Thanks for your story. It's for all the reasons you mentioned that I can't imagine anybody choosing a challenging lifestyle like homosexuality...challenging solely because of the close-mindedness of some parts of society. Hopefully it won't always be this way. I applaud you for having the courage to live what's in your heart.

I firmly belive sexual orientation is something we are born with.