Introducing...."DubyaLand!"
- Thread starter Mugg Mann
- Start date
barbeml
DIS Veteran
- Joined
- Sep 8, 2002
- Messages
- 5,422
"I have no idea what he's saying but it...
SOUNDS DANGEROUS!"
WARNING: More disorienting than Mission: Space
You'll be kept in the dark and bombarded with Dubya sound bites like:
"I've reminded the prime minister-the American people, Mr. Prime Minister, over the past months that it was not always a given that the United States and America would have a close relationship."
"We shouldn't fear a world that is more interacted."
"I think -- tide turning -- see, as I remember -- I was raised in the desert, but tides kind of -- it's easy to see a tide turn -- did I say those words?" --
"Trying to stop suiciders -- which we're doing a pretty good job of on occasion -- is difficult to do. And what the Iraqis are going to have to eventually do is convince those who are conducting suiciders who are not inspired by Al Qaeda, for example, to realize there's a peaceful tomorrow."
"You never know what your history is going to be like until long after you're gone."
"I strongly believe what we're doing is the right thing. If I didn't believe it -- I'm going to repeat what I said before -- I'd pull the troops out, nor if I believed we could win, I would pull the troops out."
SOUNDS DANGEROUS!"
WARNING: More disorienting than Mission: Space
You'll be kept in the dark and bombarded with Dubya sound bites like:
"I've reminded the prime minister-the American people, Mr. Prime Minister, over the past months that it was not always a given that the United States and America would have a close relationship."
"We shouldn't fear a world that is more interacted."
"I think -- tide turning -- see, as I remember -- I was raised in the desert, but tides kind of -- it's easy to see a tide turn -- did I say those words?" --
"Trying to stop suiciders -- which we're doing a pretty good job of on occasion -- is difficult to do. And what the Iraqis are going to have to eventually do is convince those who are conducting suiciders who are not inspired by Al Qaeda, for example, to realize there's a peaceful tomorrow."
"You never know what your history is going to be like until long after you're gone."
"I strongly believe what we're doing is the right thing. If I didn't believe it -- I'm going to repeat what I said before -- I'd pull the troops out, nor if I believed we could win, I would pull the troops out."
Independent
Earning My Ears<br><font color=red>My singing make
- Joined
- Aug 20, 2005
- Messages
- 751
Dueling Liebermans -
Two dueling coasters - one goes right, one goes left. You are left in the dark. If you think you are going right, the coaster makes a hard turn left. You see the tracks going left, yet the coaster takes a hard right.
You are relieved of the ride when both sides enter the voting booth and you are voted off the ride.
Two dueling coasters - one goes right, one goes left. You are left in the dark. If you think you are going right, the coaster makes a hard turn left. You see the tracks going left, yet the coaster takes a hard right.
You are relieved of the ride when both sides enter the voting booth and you are voted off the ride.
Laurajean1014
<font color=blue>WISH Biggest Loser/Blue Team<br><
- Joined
- Jun 28, 2001
- Messages
- 12,828
Mugg Mann said:
Love it!
I love this type of political satire.
Laurajean1014
<font color=blue>WISH Biggest Loser/Blue Team<br><
- Joined
- Jun 28, 2001
- Messages
- 12,828
Independent said:
Very good!
Laurajean1014
<font color=blue>WISH Biggest Loser/Blue Team<br><
- Joined
- Jun 28, 2001
- Messages
- 12,828
Someone tell me more about Ted Kennedy's Splash Mountain! 
Laurajean1014 said:
It's not a very popular ride in Dubyaland. Apparently it's hidden deep in a corner of the park, and you have to cross a small bridge to get there....
Once you ride it, you can't come back over the bridge and check in for at least 12 hours. (Dubyaland rules require that participants in the Dick Cheney Shooting Gallery follow the same restrictions!)
LakeAriel
DIS Veteran
- Joined
- Apr 20, 2004
- Messages
- 7,531
ChrisFL said:
He only matters after Leiberman loses for supporting you, the war in Iraq is a disaster. The war in Israel/Lebanon is a disgrace. Out pops Osama (well it's an Al Qaeda type threat
) just in the nick of time for the November elections!Are we scared yet?
mickeysgal
<font color=blue>Orange you glad I like Knock Knoc
- Joined
- Feb 8, 2001
- Messages
- 6,661
Find your lost children at the "No Child Left Behind" center where teachers on vacation can take the opportunity to further teach to the test and earn bonus bucks for their school district that may be needed in the event their school receives a Needs to Improve.
Laurajean1014
<font color=blue>WISH Biggest Loser/Blue Team<br><
- Joined
- Jun 28, 2001
- Messages
- 12,828
Okay..... I put it all together and came up with this......
Introducing...."DubyaLand!"
It was announced that plans are underway to build a gigantic amusement park called "DubyaLand".
Here's what tourists can look forward to at America's next major theme park envisioned by the current governing party of this country...
DISCLAIMER: If you don't have a sense of humor (on either side of the political aisle), just close this email right now before going any further. Do not pass go, do not collect $200, just find that "x" in the top right corner (left corner for you Mac users) and get out while you can. You've been warned!
Park I: A Magical Kingdom
Adventure land - Start a war in a mid-east country on claims that they are a national security threat. (When that doesn't pan out, just say you're there to liberate an oppressed people and spread democracy). Get to fly a war plan and land on an aircraft carrier with a "mission accomplished" banner in the background and give your VP's "former" company choice construction contracts.
Neo-Cons of the Caribbean - Come join America's favorite swashbucklers, Rumsfeld, Wolfowitz and Cheney as they blaze a path through the Middle East engaging in their favorite pastime of establishing democracies as they go without regards to the consequences. See people vote; see buildings burn (and no guesses which company gets a bloated no-bid contract to rebuild it)...and watch for the hairy leg!
Sheehan Family Tree house - Guests can climb through a walkway showcasing the habitat where a woman spent the rest of her life in a futile effort to engage the person she felt was responsible for her son's fate. Warning; this exhibit, much like the saga itself, will take many twists and turns as you walk through it.
Tomorrow land - See the fruits of all your labors! $5 a gallon gas, the beginning of WWIII in the middle east, the erosion of the middle class, utter destruction of the environment, and a corporate America that pretty much gets to do whatever it wants.
Mister Kennedy's Wild Ride - No description needed. Though it does now have TWO tracks.
Carousel of Progress - this ride has been stopped for a little over 5 years. In fact, 2/3 of the attendees swear it may even have gone backwards a little over that time frame. This ride is scheduled for repair in November of 2012.
Space Mountain - Thrill to the highs and lows as you plummet through the space between two large Dubya ears.
Cheney Lightyear Ride - Climb aboard and bomb any country that tries to quell your invasion or resist your form of democracy. See how many countries you get to join your "coalition of the willing." Then see how many stay. Be careful though, this ride is not for the faint of heart. There is a lot of spin!
Fantasyland - Enter a world where tax cuts abound while federal spending goes through the roof; yet there are no widespread economic repercussions because your team of yes men and magic 8 balls said so.
Dumbo - The Tribute Ride. No explanation needed
The Adventures of (Tony) Snow, White (House) - Scene after scary scene of Tony Snow trying to explain the actions, inactions, ramblings, 'mis' speaks', and philosophies of the White House.
Fox News Anchor Desk Spin - Modeled after the Teacup ride, you board ride cars in the shape of the Fox News anchor desk and just like the news reports, spin yourself sick!
IT'S A SMALL MIND - Permanent home of the Democratic Party.
The Haunted Mansion Ride Where you ride through the very scary cemetery of liberal ideas and the lifeless stanching corpses of democratic candidates. Narrated, of course, by the Mad Dr. Howard Dean, Also, starring Hilary Clinton (as a singing bust, singing Stand By Your Man and then as a hitchhiking ghost.
Dr. Phil-harmagic - See his freak guests and fake sympathy in 3D and surround sound. It's the same guests every show, but who cares! (If you have a weirdo sitting near you, consider it 4D!!)
Frontier land - Enjoy month long vacations several times a year on your own ranch to get away from such tedious tasks such as running the nation during war and natural disasters.
Doesnt Matter Horn- You board a humvee and climb up the mountain, while you see Osama Bin Laden pop in and out of caves, as you whiz by him because he doesnt matter.
Big Plunder Mountain - where the executives of huge companies enjoy a wild ride at the expense of the taxpayers.
SPLASH MOUNTAIN - be extra cautious on this ride, you might not make it out alive!! Ted Kennedy is the operator.
The Trash Can Gang - Where you have to go around and clean up the mess of the past administrations. This is a long ride and not for the faint hearted.
The Big Dig - Demolition and construction...you go in and take a perfectly good city, tear up all their roads and build tunnels under the city so that you can make a beautiful park above to honor your Mom, of course you have to work with the project manager's groupies to do this type of construction and demolition. Goal of this ride, try to complete the project in record time without leaking tunnels. Project Manager, Ted Kennedy, please send any and all resumes to him.
Park II: NEOCOT
Soarin' Deficits - The ride is free, but your grandkids will pay the cost plus interest and inflation on the initial ticket price. Fly over Iraq, CEO mansions, corporate HQ, and see where your taxes went. Touch back to earth feeling deflated (not elated).
Body Wars - Pick your side and duke it out with the opposition for control over a giant uterus.
Control the World Showcase
Japan - the highlights include a lifelike George Bush Sr. vomiting on the Japanese prime minister and fainting during a state dinner.
America - you get hands on interaction when George W. Bush chokes on a pretzel & the fate of the country is in your hands - do you give him the Heimlich maneuver or do you let nature take its course? (Keep in mind who the vice president is!) Speaking of Cheney there's also a hunting trip in America. You will need to sign a waiver to hunt with Cheney, though.
Middle East - And don't forget to join Dubya on a thrill ride through the Middle East in his pursuit of the "nuclear" (nuclear for anyone who actually attended high school) bombs. When no weapons of mass destruction are found Dubya declares victory.
You'd better get there soon because with Dubya in charge it will be bankrupt soon
China - The only way to leave is to guess the correct door... The First time. Otherwise your dumb stricken face will be broadcast upon large screens strategically placed around the DubyaLand.
Park III: Make Believe Man (MBM)
Tower of War on Terror - You enter the United Nations building on the ground floor. The pre-show is tuned to Fox News and you are made to feel apprehensive about all the bad guys lurking in the shadows waiting to do you personal harm. You board the elevator and it rises. Doors open on various floors showing scenes that illustrate the imminent terrorist threat. Mobile bio labs - a dictator with his finger on the button - a desert filled with missile silos. You reach the top floor.... ready for the end of the world.... and then. Sunlight, fresh air, and a gentle descent back down to reality. Your adrenaline is high, but your PO'd that you fell for the 'themeing'.
Power of terror - Take this wild, mock elevator ride through the Twilight Zone starting with Newt's "Contract for America" and continue through to Clinton's wasted impeachment proceedings, to the joke of the 2000 election, the faulty intelligence leading up to the war in Iraq, to the 2004 election and the far righter's pathetic politicizing of the gay marriage issue to the current state of things in this country...
Men in Suits- A twist. You are the alien in the ride. You are trying to escape the government who is trying to arrest you because of your country. The Men in Suits do capture you and hold you without charges. The ride takes approximately 5 years to complete and release you at the exit.
Dick Cheney: One Man's Dream - Experience Dick Cheney's apocalyptic vision in DubyaLand's darkest dark ride.
Dueling Liebermans - Two dueling coasters - one goes right, one goes left. You are left in the dark. If you think you are going right, the coaster makes a hard turn left. You see the tracks going left, yet the coaster takes a hard right.
You are relieved of the ride when both sides enter the voting booth and you are voted off the ride.
Park IV: Allies Kingdom
The Iraqi expedition trail - this ride was designed for many people to go in at once, but they failed to design a way to get back out. Admission is charged on a sliding scale, the more income made by the family, the less it will cost to get in. Highest admission costs go to those making minimum wage. All CEO's get in free.
It's Tough To Be A Lib - Culled from Fox News' extensive video archives, this glorious 3-D attraction will sweep participants up in all sorts of interactive fun highlighting liberal leaders follies. Who cares if they're all out of context; this is DubyaLand...enjoy the experience! Feel your seat vibrate as Howard Dean lets out a scream! Feel the bugs squirm underneath you and make you leap in terror whenever Hillary Clinton appears on screen! Watch the curtain expand outwards whenever Michael Moore appears on screen!
Flight of Wonder - Where you never really grow up to be like daddy and just fly all over the world to vacation. As a kid you never really have to tell the truth either. You have ( CIA ) whisper things in your ears that only you can understand or hear.
Festival of the Lying King Lots of stunts and freefalls.
Opening Soon: Third World Showcase.
Introducing...."DubyaLand!"
It was announced that plans are underway to build a gigantic amusement park called "DubyaLand".
Here's what tourists can look forward to at America's next major theme park envisioned by the current governing party of this country...
DISCLAIMER: If you don't have a sense of humor (on either side of the political aisle), just close this email right now before going any further. Do not pass go, do not collect $200, just find that "x" in the top right corner (left corner for you Mac users) and get out while you can. You've been warned!
Park I: A Magical Kingdom
Adventure land - Start a war in a mid-east country on claims that they are a national security threat. (When that doesn't pan out, just say you're there to liberate an oppressed people and spread democracy). Get to fly a war plan and land on an aircraft carrier with a "mission accomplished" banner in the background and give your VP's "former" company choice construction contracts.
Neo-Cons of the Caribbean - Come join America's favorite swashbucklers, Rumsfeld, Wolfowitz and Cheney as they blaze a path through the Middle East engaging in their favorite pastime of establishing democracies as they go without regards to the consequences. See people vote; see buildings burn (and no guesses which company gets a bloated no-bid contract to rebuild it)...and watch for the hairy leg!
Sheehan Family Tree house - Guests can climb through a walkway showcasing the habitat where a woman spent the rest of her life in a futile effort to engage the person she felt was responsible for her son's fate. Warning; this exhibit, much like the saga itself, will take many twists and turns as you walk through it.
Tomorrow land - See the fruits of all your labors! $5 a gallon gas, the beginning of WWIII in the middle east, the erosion of the middle class, utter destruction of the environment, and a corporate America that pretty much gets to do whatever it wants.
Mister Kennedy's Wild Ride - No description needed. Though it does now have TWO tracks.
Carousel of Progress - this ride has been stopped for a little over 5 years. In fact, 2/3 of the attendees swear it may even have gone backwards a little over that time frame. This ride is scheduled for repair in November of 2012.
Space Mountain - Thrill to the highs and lows as you plummet through the space between two large Dubya ears.
Cheney Lightyear Ride - Climb aboard and bomb any country that tries to quell your invasion or resist your form of democracy. See how many countries you get to join your "coalition of the willing." Then see how many stay. Be careful though, this ride is not for the faint of heart. There is a lot of spin!
Fantasyland - Enter a world where tax cuts abound while federal spending goes through the roof; yet there are no widespread economic repercussions because your team of yes men and magic 8 balls said so.
Dumbo - The Tribute Ride. No explanation needed
The Adventures of (Tony) Snow, White (House) - Scene after scary scene of Tony Snow trying to explain the actions, inactions, ramblings, 'mis' speaks', and philosophies of the White House.
Fox News Anchor Desk Spin - Modeled after the Teacup ride, you board ride cars in the shape of the Fox News anchor desk and just like the news reports, spin yourself sick!
IT'S A SMALL MIND - Permanent home of the Democratic Party.
The Haunted Mansion Ride Where you ride through the very scary cemetery of liberal ideas and the lifeless stanching corpses of democratic candidates. Narrated, of course, by the Mad Dr. Howard Dean, Also, starring Hilary Clinton (as a singing bust, singing Stand By Your Man and then as a hitchhiking ghost.
Dr. Phil-harmagic - See his freak guests and fake sympathy in 3D and surround sound. It's the same guests every show, but who cares! (If you have a weirdo sitting near you, consider it 4D!!)
Frontier land - Enjoy month long vacations several times a year on your own ranch to get away from such tedious tasks such as running the nation during war and natural disasters.
Doesnt Matter Horn- You board a humvee and climb up the mountain, while you see Osama Bin Laden pop in and out of caves, as you whiz by him because he doesnt matter.
Big Plunder Mountain - where the executives of huge companies enjoy a wild ride at the expense of the taxpayers.
SPLASH MOUNTAIN - be extra cautious on this ride, you might not make it out alive!! Ted Kennedy is the operator.
The Trash Can Gang - Where you have to go around and clean up the mess of the past administrations. This is a long ride and not for the faint hearted.
The Big Dig - Demolition and construction...you go in and take a perfectly good city, tear up all their roads and build tunnels under the city so that you can make a beautiful park above to honor your Mom, of course you have to work with the project manager's groupies to do this type of construction and demolition. Goal of this ride, try to complete the project in record time without leaking tunnels. Project Manager, Ted Kennedy, please send any and all resumes to him.
Park II: NEOCOT
Soarin' Deficits - The ride is free, but your grandkids will pay the cost plus interest and inflation on the initial ticket price. Fly over Iraq, CEO mansions, corporate HQ, and see where your taxes went. Touch back to earth feeling deflated (not elated).
Body Wars - Pick your side and duke it out with the opposition for control over a giant uterus.
Control the World Showcase
Japan - the highlights include a lifelike George Bush Sr. vomiting on the Japanese prime minister and fainting during a state dinner.
America - you get hands on interaction when George W. Bush chokes on a pretzel & the fate of the country is in your hands - do you give him the Heimlich maneuver or do you let nature take its course? (Keep in mind who the vice president is!) Speaking of Cheney there's also a hunting trip in America. You will need to sign a waiver to hunt with Cheney, though.
Middle East - And don't forget to join Dubya on a thrill ride through the Middle East in his pursuit of the "nuclear" (nuclear for anyone who actually attended high school) bombs. When no weapons of mass destruction are found Dubya declares victory.
You'd better get there soon because with Dubya in charge it will be bankrupt soon
China - The only way to leave is to guess the correct door... The First time. Otherwise your dumb stricken face will be broadcast upon large screens strategically placed around the DubyaLand.
Park III: Make Believe Man (MBM)
Tower of War on Terror - You enter the United Nations building on the ground floor. The pre-show is tuned to Fox News and you are made to feel apprehensive about all the bad guys lurking in the shadows waiting to do you personal harm. You board the elevator and it rises. Doors open on various floors showing scenes that illustrate the imminent terrorist threat. Mobile bio labs - a dictator with his finger on the button - a desert filled with missile silos. You reach the top floor.... ready for the end of the world.... and then. Sunlight, fresh air, and a gentle descent back down to reality. Your adrenaline is high, but your PO'd that you fell for the 'themeing'.
Power of terror - Take this wild, mock elevator ride through the Twilight Zone starting with Newt's "Contract for America" and continue through to Clinton's wasted impeachment proceedings, to the joke of the 2000 election, the faulty intelligence leading up to the war in Iraq, to the 2004 election and the far righter's pathetic politicizing of the gay marriage issue to the current state of things in this country...
Men in Suits- A twist. You are the alien in the ride. You are trying to escape the government who is trying to arrest you because of your country. The Men in Suits do capture you and hold you without charges. The ride takes approximately 5 years to complete and release you at the exit.
Dick Cheney: One Man's Dream - Experience Dick Cheney's apocalyptic vision in DubyaLand's darkest dark ride.
Dueling Liebermans - Two dueling coasters - one goes right, one goes left. You are left in the dark. If you think you are going right, the coaster makes a hard turn left. You see the tracks going left, yet the coaster takes a hard right.
You are relieved of the ride when both sides enter the voting booth and you are voted off the ride.
Park IV: Allies Kingdom
The Iraqi expedition trail - this ride was designed for many people to go in at once, but they failed to design a way to get back out. Admission is charged on a sliding scale, the more income made by the family, the less it will cost to get in. Highest admission costs go to those making minimum wage. All CEO's get in free.
It's Tough To Be A Lib - Culled from Fox News' extensive video archives, this glorious 3-D attraction will sweep participants up in all sorts of interactive fun highlighting liberal leaders follies. Who cares if they're all out of context; this is DubyaLand...enjoy the experience! Feel your seat vibrate as Howard Dean lets out a scream! Feel the bugs squirm underneath you and make you leap in terror whenever Hillary Clinton appears on screen! Watch the curtain expand outwards whenever Michael Moore appears on screen!
Flight of Wonder - Where you never really grow up to be like daddy and just fly all over the world to vacation. As a kid you never really have to tell the truth either. You have ( CIA ) whisper things in your ears that only you can understand or hear.
Festival of the Lying King Lots of stunts and freefalls.
Opening Soon: Third World Showcase.
Hey kids! Want to throw a baseball in a replica of Fenway Park. For $1 a throw, try Kerry's First Pitch . Loud Red Sox fans will distract you. Photo flashes will blind you. Throw for speed and accuracy. Prizes awarded for anyone who can hit the catcher's glove. While waiting in our queue, check out eveyone's favorite Red Sox player, the Eddie Yost collection.
At Dubyaland, try our delicious freedom fries served with a side of W ketchup.
At Dubyaland, try our delicious freedom fries served with a side of W ketchup.
And don't miss the "CondiArcade". The object of this game of skill is to see how many pairs of designer shoes you can buy while you simultaneously try to deal with a natural disaster. Challenges include having to wear a set of earphones with a continuous loop of speeches made by Kathleen Blanco in one ear and Mary Landrieu in the other. You may not adjust the volume. You may call a lifeline but be aware the person you call can leave for vacation in Texas at any time. If you loose, you are automatically stranded on the premises. You will be able to leave in 5 to 7 days. Pets are not allowed in this game.
NELSON
Ruffian about town
- Joined
- Jun 14, 2006
- Messages
- 196
JOHN KERRY'S JUNGLE CRUISE take a swift boat ride through the rivers of Cambodia, or was it Laos? Only operating during Christmas season.
Afterwhich you can enjoy a liquid lunch at the Teri Shiavo counter service, where a judge removes your feeding tube.
HA HA
Afterwhich you can enjoy a liquid lunch at the Teri Shiavo counter service, where a judge removes your feeding tube.
HA HA
Thanks to LauraJean for nominating herself and accepting the role of club secretary! Nicely done on the summary!
(Although methinks there's an ulterior motive; can I get a nickle of royalties for every person that list now gets forwarded to?!?)
(Although methinks there's an ulterior motive; can I get a nickle of royalties for every person that list now gets forwarded to?!?)
And the hits just keep on coming.....
Cheney's Energy Adventure- Situated in NEOCOT, Cheney's Energy Adventure is Dubyaland's most spectacular pavillion; it's rumored that participants ride around in large cars and observe the history of fossil fuels from the beginning of time all the way to how they get distributed in todays modern world. We say rumored, because no one from the public has ever been admitted in to see how Cheney's Energy Adventure actually works.
Also, unlike the WDW attraction, both Bill Nye and Ellen DeGeneres do not appear in Dubyaland's exhibit. Bill Nye is not there because he represents legitimate science, and Ellen's absence from Dubyaland simply needs no further explanation.
Cheney's Energy Adventure- Situated in NEOCOT, Cheney's Energy Adventure is Dubyaland's most spectacular pavillion; it's rumored that participants ride around in large cars and observe the history of fossil fuels from the beginning of time all the way to how they get distributed in todays modern world. We say rumored, because no one from the public has ever been admitted in to see how Cheney's Energy Adventure actually works.
Also, unlike the WDW attraction, both Bill Nye and Ellen DeGeneres do not appear in Dubyaland's exhibit. Bill Nye is not there because he represents legitimate science, and Ellen's absence from Dubyaland simply needs no further explanation.
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