oldkicker
<font color=purple>Pay no attention to <img src=ht
- Joined
- Aug 23, 1999
- Messages
- 9,835
I watched Spiderman last night on HBO and woke up this morning with an interesting realization. It's a good thing that Peter Parker was a teen when that mutated spider gave him a nip.
Imagine if it happened much later in his life, when Peter might have been chaperoning his own son on the school trip......
Peter, laying prone on the couch, spinning a web to retrieve the remote control, which lays JUST out of reach.
Peter only being able to spin a web once, maybe twice a month.
Instead of chasing after the bad guys, Peter would have used the internet to find them out, get their phone numbers and call them with stern lectures and warnings.
Peter, halfway up a wall, pulling out a bottle of Dasani and an energy bar.
Much more material in that outfit. Much more.
Spiderman's true identify discovered when an AARP card was found at the scene of the crime....
This scene....
"Peter felt his spider sense tingle and leapt to safety just moments before he heard the rope break and the pile of lumber fell."
becomes..
"Peter heard the rope break and woke up several months later in a semi-private room at Community Hospital, with Batman in the next bed going on and on and on about how he, Batman, was gonna kick some serious butt when he got outta there. Peter was discharged after regaining consciousness and dealing with several hospital administrators as to why he had no insurance."
Peter hanging upside down on a length of spider-line, his head solidly touching the ground.
Peter investigating any crime that happens between 6 am and 8 pm. June - September.
Ya know - I don't think Spiderman belongs to the ages.
He belongs to the young.
Oh! By the way - my alter ego is OLDKICKER.
I'm a realist......kinda.
Imagine if it happened much later in his life, when Peter might have been chaperoning his own son on the school trip......
Peter, laying prone on the couch, spinning a web to retrieve the remote control, which lays JUST out of reach.
Peter only being able to spin a web once, maybe twice a month.
Instead of chasing after the bad guys, Peter would have used the internet to find them out, get their phone numbers and call them with stern lectures and warnings.
Peter, halfway up a wall, pulling out a bottle of Dasani and an energy bar.
Much more material in that outfit. Much more.
Spiderman's true identify discovered when an AARP card was found at the scene of the crime....
This scene....
"Peter felt his spider sense tingle and leapt to safety just moments before he heard the rope break and the pile of lumber fell."
becomes..
"Peter heard the rope break and woke up several months later in a semi-private room at Community Hospital, with Batman in the next bed going on and on and on about how he, Batman, was gonna kick some serious butt when he got outta there. Peter was discharged after regaining consciousness and dealing with several hospital administrators as to why he had no insurance."
Peter hanging upside down on a length of spider-line, his head solidly touching the ground.
Peter investigating any crime that happens between 6 am and 8 pm. June - September.
Ya know - I don't think Spiderman belongs to the ages.
He belongs to the young.
Oh! By the way - my alter ego is OLDKICKER.
I'm a realist......kinda.
