I'm the meanest, evilist Mom around (Long)

[Cass]

Well, according to D12 I am.

She has a gamboy advance and about 6 games, she loves nintendogs.. anyway, she is not allowed to take it to school or out of the house really, except for the car if we're driving somewhere.

On the last day of school (last Wed) she brought it down from her room and asked if she could please take it to school because they were having a party and snacks, and all the kids were bringing their gameboys and they were going to play together and try each others game.

I told her it wasn't a good idea, it might get lost, stolen, damaged but she insisted it would be fine.

So she comes home from school at 4pm and right away I can tell there is something wrong, she is not celebrating that school is out and she goes straight up to her room. Later I find a note on the kitchen counter

Mom'

Don't freak out

I was afraid to tell you but my gameboy disappeared, the last person I saw with it was Elizabeth.

I'll call her and some of my friends and I'll find out where it is.


So I didn't freak out, but I couldn't resist pointing out that I told her not to take it to school for this very reason and I agreed she should do her best to track it down and she told me she had told the teacher and he was going to investigate a bit (they are still at school for 2 weeks)

So the next day was Thurs and she was home all day, when I came home from work I asked her how it went with the phone calls and she said 'Oh, I didn't get a chance to call anyone;

What? she was home all day

So I told her to make sure it got done... later that night one of the kids from school called and they talked for awhile, I asked her what they said about the gameboy and DD12 said 'she forgot to ask her;



Friday, I get home from work... she Still has not called anyone about her missing gameboy. That night her Dad picks her up for the weekend (we're divorced)

Sunday night DD12 arrives back home grinning ear to ear with a brand new Game Boy Advance DS whatever... her Dad had bought her one.

Well, I was not impressed I took it away from her. I told her while it was not her fault if she was the victim of a theft, she is still responsible to look after her things, especially valuable things and there are consequences. Also the fact that she had not made inquires with the kids in her class as to what they saw and it had only been 2 days for the teacher to do what he was going to do at school.

She cried and told me that her dad bought it and that there was nothing I could do about it.

Oh yeah?

So I didn't let her have it and I tucked it away in the house somewhere. Today her Dad and I discussed the issue, he said he just felt really bad because she was crying about it being stolen and wanted to cheer her up.

I said 'too bad' she has to learn a lesson here and the lesson is not going to be you get a new toy when you don't take care of the old one. So we had some words and I said if he was going to buy her a new one it should be at Christmas or something, not right away.

Our house was robbed 2 years ago, came home and everything was torn apart, they took DDs(10at time) portable DVD player that she loved and used all the time. One of the first thing I did was replace it, because I felt so bad for her, but this time it is different.

So basically is it my business to take something from DD12 that her Dad gave her?

Should I give it back?

Am I the meanest Mother alive?

 

[DisneyMommyMichelle]

not the meanest mother alive at all. She needs to at least make an attempt to find her old one. With the new one around her she would figure oh well this one is better adnthat's that. I think you did the right thing.

 

[Cass]

Oh and one more tidbit for you to consider. She told me that she wants the new one because it is a better version of gameboy, faster, brighter, smaller in size.

She definately doesn't seem interested in finding the last one.

 

[Doesney]

Ahh, give it back. She obviously was upset that it disappeared but maybe she didn't want to confront her friends. Life is too short to sweat the small stuff.

 

[Disney Doll]

Well, I don't know what to tell you. I agree with you with regard to her lack of trying to find the Gameboy and losing it in the first place.

But you and Dad have to get on the same page. This is a classic case of the kid having the ability to play one against the other.

 

[Miss Jasmine]

Oh and one more tidbit for you to consider. She told me that she wants the new one because it is a better version of gameboy, faster, brighter, smaller in size.

She definately doesn't seem interested in finding the last one.

I was thinking that maybe the original one ended up broken and that's why she wasn't really "looking" for it. I can't understand being so upset about something missing and not trying to track it down. I think there is more to the story.

 

[doxdogy]

I voted for other. I would give it back to her when she has proven that she is responsible enough to have it back. This would include making every effort to find out what happened to other one.

 

[DisneyMommyMichelle]

I voted for other. I would give it back to her when she has proven that she is responsible enough to have it back. This would include making every effort to find out what happened to other one.

i like this idea

 

[Cass]

On top of it all I blame myself because although I told her no and why she couldn't take it, I did let her do it. I should have stuck to my rule that things like this arent' for school, even on the last day.

Her Dad and I are on the same page now, he told me he would support whatever I decide and he called DD12 and explained that it was wrong of him to go buy one without her looking for the other (she had conveniently left that part out of the story she gave him)

 

[WatchinCaptKangaroo]

Oh and one more tidbit for you to consider. She told me that she wants the new one because it is a better version of gameboy, faster, brighter, smaller in size.

She definately doesn't seem interested in finding the last one.

I'm thinking she lost it on purpose. I did a similar thing when I was her age. I wanted a new cooler tape player so I *broke* my old one.

If she was making an effort I'd say give her the game boy when she goes back to her dads, and if he wants her to have it then she can keep it there for x amount of time. If it was really stolen then I'd say the effort put into finding it would determine how soon she could have the new one. Having a house broken into and having a gameboy stolen at school when she shouldn't have had it there to begin with are two different stories.

 

[castleview]

[/QUOTE] Am I the meanest Mother alive?[/QUOTE]

Well, welcome to the club!

 

[FreshTressa]

Oh and one more tidbit for you to consider. She told me that she wants the new one because it is a better version of gameboy, faster, brighter, smaller in size.

She definately doesn't seem interested in finding the last one.

If she can find the old one, let her keep the new one. If not...tough. Sounds like she did not even TRY to get it back.

 

[Rajah]

I voted for other. I would give it back to her when she has proven that she is responsible enough to have it back. This would include making every effort to find out what happened to other one.

 

[southernbella]

I would make exDH take it back. You did the right thing taking it away. Plus, her telling you that her Dad bought it & there was nothing you could do about it. I would have taken it away just saying that!

Sbella- another mean, evil Mom

 

[lulugirl]

I voted for other. I would give it back to her when she has proven that she is responsible enough to have it back. This would include making every effort to find out what happened to other one.

I agree!
I think if your kids don't, at some point in their life think you are "the meanest mom in the world" you probably aren't doing your job.
I'm glad you and your Ex are on the same page, nice to have back up!

 

[tinkersmama]

I would give it back to her Dad and let her have it over at his house. If she wants a gameboy to play at your house then she needs to find the other one.

 

[FreshTressa]

I'm thinking she lost it on purpose. I did a similar thing when I was her age. I wanted a new cooler tape player so I *broke* my old one.

Hehe, I broke a dresser kind of accidentally on purpose as an adult to get a new one from DH!!

 

[FreshTressa]

whoops...double post

 

[Marseeya]

I would give it back to her Dad and let her have it over at his house. If she wants a gameboy to play at your house then she needs to find the other one.

That was my thinking as well, especially when she said she and her ex had words. But I see they're on the same page now, so I more agree with Doxydog's post.

 

[NAB]

I voted other, I would take it away until school is out. Maybe then you will find out about the other one. I too think there is more to the story if she isn't looking for it. The truth usually comes out in the long run around here. Don't feel bad for her taking it to school. In this house that is always happened and I don't want my son to take things either. But it is a good way for them to learn to be responsible and have consequences when something goes wrong.

I think we are have felt like the meanest mom at one time or another.