BroganMc
It's not the age, it's the mileage
- Joined
- Feb 12, 2005
- Messages
- 2,991
Oh you poor moms. I feel for ya.
However, I'm on the other side of the fence. My mom was so terrified of my driving, I didn't learn to do it until after she passed away. (Yes, I'm trying to make light of it.) Truth is my older siblings had enough accidents between them that by the time I (the baby) came along, Mom just couldn't bear the thought. I also grew up disabled which meant her baby was already damaged. Why risk her in the big nasty road of aggressive drivers?
The flip side is it became a big issue between the two of us and severely handicapped my independence. I finally had enough and just signed up for evaluations and lessons without her. She did approve the idea in the end, there were just other more important things going on at the time for her health.
Anyway, because of my disability I had to go through twice the training of ordinary drivers. That was 60 hours on the road with a special instructor and another 60 hours with a licensed driver (sister and dad), plus the 20 hours of classwork. I did everything from highway driving (which I hate), to country driving (where I live) and city driving (which I prefer over highways). I drove in rain, snow, sleet, night, day, fog, and clear skies.
Yet the first time I went out with my sister I had an incident. (I got sideswiped by a clueless dump truck.) I learned then why my sister should NEVER teach my nephews to drive. While I was doing my best to not panic and maintain control of the car going 50 mph, my sister was screaming her fool head off. I got so upset with her that day I literally kicked her out of my car.
The last thing you ever want to do to a new driver is panic. Don't yell, don't cringe, don't harass them. Give clear instructions well in advance and speak in a calm voice. Instructors need to have ice in their veins.
When I first started driving, I would give updates as to where I was going and what route I'd take. My SIL wouldn't let me drive her kids for 2 years unless my dad was in the car. (Despite the fact I drive more cautiously than she does.)
In the last 7 years I've been around 4 accidents, all involving someone or something else's aggression: dump truck driver who merged into my lane without looking, two cars colliding in front of me at a traffic light, a deer in heat dashing into my car across a country lane, and a drunk driver fleeing police who drove around me to kill himself by running into a tree. I got tapped on my bumper in the rain when I aborted a "right on red" turn to avoid getting creamed by the bus racing around the corner and the lady behind me forgot where I was. The only time I was ever stopped by police it was for a headlight that had just burned out.
In short, I know it is dangerous out there. I appreciate the reasons for my mom's fears. I always remember her advice "expect the other drivers are lunatics who want to kill you" when I hit the road. I'm always looking for someone to pull out suddenly or race me to a red light. But being given the freedom to drive and have that experience was one of the best things for me.
OP sounds like your son is being responsible. Just say an extra prayer when he goes out and ask God to be his wing man. I can't tell you how grateful I've been to my guardian angels. The day they kept me from even getting a scratch on my car when that drunk driver hit a tree right in front of me is one I'll never forget. I still say a prayer for that young man whenever I pass the spot he died. It is on the country road where I live so I pass it everyday I leave home.
However, I'm on the other side of the fence. My mom was so terrified of my driving, I didn't learn to do it until after she passed away. (Yes, I'm trying to make light of it.) Truth is my older siblings had enough accidents between them that by the time I (the baby) came along, Mom just couldn't bear the thought. I also grew up disabled which meant her baby was already damaged. Why risk her in the big nasty road of aggressive drivers?
The flip side is it became a big issue between the two of us and severely handicapped my independence. I finally had enough and just signed up for evaluations and lessons without her. She did approve the idea in the end, there were just other more important things going on at the time for her health.
Anyway, because of my disability I had to go through twice the training of ordinary drivers. That was 60 hours on the road with a special instructor and another 60 hours with a licensed driver (sister and dad), plus the 20 hours of classwork. I did everything from highway driving (which I hate), to country driving (where I live) and city driving (which I prefer over highways). I drove in rain, snow, sleet, night, day, fog, and clear skies.
Yet the first time I went out with my sister I had an incident. (I got sideswiped by a clueless dump truck.) I learned then why my sister should NEVER teach my nephews to drive. While I was doing my best to not panic and maintain control of the car going 50 mph, my sister was screaming her fool head off. I got so upset with her that day I literally kicked her out of my car.
The last thing you ever want to do to a new driver is panic. Don't yell, don't cringe, don't harass them. Give clear instructions well in advance and speak in a calm voice. Instructors need to have ice in their veins.
When I first started driving, I would give updates as to where I was going and what route I'd take. My SIL wouldn't let me drive her kids for 2 years unless my dad was in the car. (Despite the fact I drive more cautiously than she does.)
In the last 7 years I've been around 4 accidents, all involving someone or something else's aggression: dump truck driver who merged into my lane without looking, two cars colliding in front of me at a traffic light, a deer in heat dashing into my car across a country lane, and a drunk driver fleeing police who drove around me to kill himself by running into a tree. I got tapped on my bumper in the rain when I aborted a "right on red" turn to avoid getting creamed by the bus racing around the corner and the lady behind me forgot where I was. The only time I was ever stopped by police it was for a headlight that had just burned out.
In short, I know it is dangerous out there. I appreciate the reasons for my mom's fears. I always remember her advice "expect the other drivers are lunatics who want to kill you" when I hit the road. I'm always looking for someone to pull out suddenly or race me to a red light. But being given the freedom to drive and have that experience was one of the best things for me.
OP sounds like your son is being responsible. Just say an extra prayer when he goes out and ask God to be his wing man. I can't tell you how grateful I've been to my guardian angels. The day they kept me from even getting a scratch on my car when that drunk driver hit a tree right in front of me is one I'll never forget. I still say a prayer for that young man whenever I pass the spot he died. It is on the country road where I live so I pass it everyday I leave home.
I'm sure as each day goes by without any mishaps, my anxiety will be relieved....and i WILL ask God to be his wingman!! 
You see, you never grow out of the hot-rodder (though it will probably be classified more as a mid-life crises car).
