I'm Abe Froman

[monkeyboy]

The sausage king of Chicago

 

[Bob Slydell]

How can possibly be expected to handle school on a day like today??

 

[cynsaun]

Listen young man, entrenuer, I'm very busy here. Why don't you take the kids and go back to the clubhouse.

 

[monkeyboy]

I do have a test today. that wasn't bull.

It's on European socialism. I mean, really, what's the point? I'm not European. I don't plan on being European.

So who cares if they're socialists?

They could be fascist anarchists. It still doesn't change the fact that I don't own a car.

 

[iansmomm]

bueller........bueller........bueller...........


anyone........anyone......anyone......

 

[kasar]

Ladies and gentlemen, you are such a wonderful crowd, we'd like to play a little tune for you. It's one of my personal favorites and I'd like to dedicate it to a young man who doesn't think he's seen anything good today - Cameron Frye, this one's for you.

 

[Cindy B]

Danke Schane!

 

[cynsaun]

This is my ninth sick day this semester. It's getting pretty tough coming up with new illnesses. If I go for ten, I'm probably gonna have to barf up a lung. So, I better make this one count.

 

[iansmomm]

You wear too much eye makeup. My sister wears too much eye makeup, and people think she's a *****.

 

[Beth76]

Are you suggesting that I'm not who I say I am?

 

[monkeyboy]

Incredible! One of the worst performances of my career and they never doubted it for a second

 

[kasar]

I don't believe this. If I was bleeding out my eyes, you guys would make me go to school

 

[Shugardrawers]

Cameron is so uptight if you stuck a lump of coal up his *** you'd have a diamond in two weeks.

 

[Maleficent13]

A:You can never go too far.
B:If I'm gonna get busted, it is not gonna be by a guy like that.

 

[iansmomm]

you want a gummy bear? theyre nice and warm from being in my pocket all day.

 

[Shugardrawers]

The question isn't what ARE we going to do. It's what AREN'T we going to do?

 

[Rippington'sFan]

A guy goes into the store and says to the clerk, I would like some Polish Sausage. The clerk looks at him and says "Are you Polish?"

The guy says "Well, yes I am. If I had asked for Italian sausage would you ask me if I was Italian??? or if I had asked for German sausage, would you ask me if I was German??" Or if I had asked for a taco would you ask if I was Mexican?

The clerk says "Well, no."

The guy says "Then, why do you ask me if I'm Polish just because I ask for Polish sausage???"

The clerk says "Because this is a hardware store.

 

[Maleficent13]

My best friend's sister's boyfriend's brother's girlfriend heard from this guy who knows this kid who's going with the girl who saw Ferris pass out at 31 Flavors last night. I guess it's pretty serious.

 

[leahannpen]

He's very popular, Ed. Sportos, motorheads, geeks, sluts, pinheads, dweebies, wonkers, richies, they all adore him.

 

[helenabear]

The key to faking out the parents is the clammy hands. It's a good non-specific symptom. I'm a big believer in it. A lot of people will tell you a good phoney fever is a deadlock, but you get a nervous mother, you could wind up in a doctor's office--that's worse than school. You fake a stomach cramp, and when you're bent over, moaning and wailing, you lick your palms. It's a little childish and stupid, but then so is high school.