I think my son needs a counselor.

[ead79]

for you and your son. I'm 30 years old, and I just started seeing a counselor this summer for a phobia of throwing up that I've had for around 10 years now. It had gotten to the point where it was controlling too much of my life, and I finally gave in and went to see a counselor. In our first session, she asked me if I ever had any anxiety issues as a child. I think I hid it from my parents pretty well, but looking back now, I absolutely did have some anxiety issues--fear of fire alarms, twisting my button on my shirt when nervous, etc. I sure wish I had gone to see a counselor as a kid!

Honestly, counseling has been a true God-send for me. My counselor also sees lots of kids, as anxiety issues can be common in kids. Don't worry for a second about telling her all about your son's counting and other issues. There is nothing they haven't heard before, and having all the info can help them as they treat your son. If he does have OCD (my anxiety issue is sort of a type of OCD - contamination OCD), then there are all sorts of ways they can help him cope with that.

And rest assured that you are doing everything you can. There is nothing at all wrong with needing some professional assistance when parenting.

 

[dopeysgirl01]

I took my ds, now 10, to a psychologist when he was 7. It was the best thing I could do for him and my family. The dr. would start the session just talking to me about what had been going on since the last visit or any pressing concerns. He'd save time after to wrap up with me. He helped me to help my son by giving me tips to help him control his frustration and anxiety. Kids aren't able to express themselves the way adults are and the dr. was able to interpret what my son was going through. Good luck to you an your son. You're doing the best thing you can do for him!

 

[minkydog]

We went through a similar experience when DS23 was about 4. I had just lost a baby in a 2nd trimester miscarriage. We had not told John about the baby because it was the holidays. He's always been a bit high-strung so we just wanted to get through that high stress period first. Unfortunately, I lost the baby on Christmas Eve. We didn't talk about it in his presence.

About 2 wks later we began to see changes. Of course, I was very depressed myself and that probalby added to his distress. Anyway, he figured it out and became distraught. He had been asking for a sister for a couple years and this baby was a girl, so it was doubly painful. He started drawing disturbing pictures of bloody knives, dead animals, dead people. Then one day he casually mentioned that he wanted to be dead so he could go to heaven to take care of the baby. That's when I called the doctor and got him into some therapy. He went a couple times a week for 2 months. The therapist did some play therapy to help him get his feelings out and he did real well.

I think you're on the right track. You know, everyone grieves differently and some of us have very strong reactions, especially when it's someone we are very close to like a parent or grandparent. The counting is his way of controlling his environment, but it sounds like even that is not helping him as much as it used to. Time to get someone else involved, someone who has experience working with children and grief issues. I believe things will start looking up once he finds away to deal with the anxiety and grief.

 

[jfoofj]

I just got the call from the coordinator to say that she got the referral from the pediatrician and I will be receiving a call to have him come in for an evaluation. Once that is done they decide who he needs to see. It is a huge relief.... I feel like a big hurdle was just jumped.

I talked to my son after school and told him that we would be getting and appt to see a worry doctor and he seemed relieved too. I told him that no matter what it took, I would figure out what he needed to feel better. I asked him about the numbers again and he said that "they need to be even." He is also a tapper with his pinky fingers (when walking through doorjambs or getting into a car, but he is VERY discreet when he does it) and he said that if the numbers come up odd, he has to tap them even.... I said I understood but really I am confounded. My brother says he used to count words when people spoke when he was my sons age and he wanted what they said (and what he spoke) to be divisible by 5.

As for hearing the numbers... I really don't know what that is all about, but I suppose anything is possible... who knows what the mind is capable of. I guess it will come up when talking to the evaluator, we will see what they say.

Thanks for all the input/stories/experiences. It really helps to hear people tell about their situations and that they had similar experiences.

 

[LUCiD]

I don't know the right way to say this, but your son might have OCD. I also think that taking him to a counseler is the right thing to do. Tell your son that I hope he feels better soon, please!