I think my 13 DS is addicted to video gaming

[B&B Mom]

I got up about an hour ago (4am) for a nightly trip to the bathroom and discovered my son up playing video games!!! I know he enjoys playing but this is getting out of hand. He has at times shown that he can't self regulate with gaming and we've reined him in by restricting access, but this is different. I'm so worried now that I can't even sleep.
I know it's going to be a long summer with too much free time for him while my husband and I both work fulltime.

 

[canadaman]

My 2 sons, aged 10 and 8 are very fond of video games too. DS 8 is worse then the older one. We have to restrict access to the both of them. We are try to show them alternatives but it is tough sledding...

 

[Happy 2 B Me]

Decided to not post sorry

 

[Tower]

DS10 loves his DSi, WII and online computer games. We installed netnanny a few years ago however and it has a time feature that we've restricted all 3 kids to just 2 hours a day. Now we say 2hrs/day for everything combined and the rest go out and play, but we can't put the netnanny onto the Wii or DSi, so we still have to monitor that.
We allow DSi for longer road trips etc. to restrict the 'Are We There Yet's
I am very strict with that computer time and we can lock any of our kids out as required for punishment. I just locked DS10 out last night and that grounding is indefinite until he shows the proper responsibilities we expect of a 10 yr old. May be a long summer, but it's his own problem if he decides to ruin his priveledeges.

 

[bzlady2]

Years ago when my kids were young I would restrict access to the gaming systems by holding the controllers. They could be "signed out" for specific amounts of time. Hope this helps. It is easy to get addicted to games, Facebook etc..

You might want to consider other things for him especially physical activity that would tire him out so sleep would be more important than gaming. LOL

 

[dopeyluvsgrumpy]

My aunt was having the same issues wth her 15 year old son. What she ended us doing was taking away the remote controls at a certain time each night so that he couldn't play. If she needs to leave the house she takes the power cables....I know it sounds drastic but it worked.

 

[joyride]

He's probably playing an FPS online (First Person Shooter - most likely Call of Duty) and trying to level up.

One option is, if he is playing online, you can setup your router to disable Internet access between certain hours of the day or night.

 

[Disney_Mama]

I'm in the same boat with DD12. She would play all day if I let her. Rule for the summer is..... only when you wake up till you eat breakfast. Then not again untill after dinner. If it's a rainy day then the rules don't apply. She is hanging out with my nephews this week that have no rules in place so it's going to be a tough week.

 

[damo]

He could also be playing WarCraft. For those games, they can play in teams and they set up times to play with others. Just set down some guidelines since it can really get out of hand with the online games.
My son says his team was playing the other night and one of the team was a surgeon who got an emergency call to go do surgery, lol. He told them he'd be back in a few hours.

My son isn't a kid anymore but he sure enjoys his gaming!

 

[EvangelineG]

Gaming can be really hard to walk away from depending on which game and what you're trying to do. I'm an adult and I sometimes have a hard time sticking to a healthy limit, especially if I've just gotten a new game!
We also limit gaming and computer time for our 11 yo sons. They need someone to push them when it comes to putting down that controller and going outside/being active, or else they would stay on all day.

 

[Debbie]

He could also be playing WarCraft. For those games, they can play in teams and they set up times to play with others. Just set down some guidelines since it can really get out of hand with the online games.
My son says his team was playing the other night and one of the team was a surgeon who got an emergency call to go do surgery, lol. He told them he'd be back in a few hours.

My son isn't a kid anymore but he sure enjoys his gaming!

Mine too! No words of wisdom, but to set up the limits together, so that you both are aware of what the expectations are.

 

[B&B Mom]

Thanks so much for the input everyone...it does help a bit to know there are others out there that have to set limits too.

I do like the idea of taking the controllers this will help remove the temptation.

I am planning to sit down this evening and have us work out a plan that we can both live with. In the meanwhile keeping busy outside and with friends will hopefully be enough to occupy his time. I can see where this will be an ongoing item for us to deal with.

I guess that's one thing I can always count on: the evolving life of a teenager!

 

[bankr63]

Note that the Wii has a net nanny type feature as well. Haven't played with it much, and not sure that it can actually lock kids out, but it will certainly tell you how long and what your kids are playing. Every parent should know how to check it...

 

[Mike2023]

I think addicted is the wrong word. Might be a bit strong.

http://www.thefreedictionary.com/addicted

I work in the gaming industry and I will recommend to you the same thing I do to all parents. Get educated on the subject. Find out what games he plays, look into the content. Google it. Sometimes we need to make decisions for our kids.

Games are no worse then any other form of entertainment. It falls to us parents to regulate them just like anything else.

Someone in this thread mentioned that your son is most likely playing a game like Call Of Duty. This game ends up in kids and teens hands more then any other game on the market. This is a mature rated game not to be sold to anyone under the age of 17. Yet parents pass it off because "its just a game".

Anyways, set up a schedule. Eg, 3 hours outside gets you 2 hours on the xbox or whatever.

Good luck.

 

[alohamom]

First I applaud you for "seeing" the problem, you are obviously a caring and wise parent. Second I think your approach is a great one, sit down, talk it out and work out something you can both live with. I think if you jump on them with blame and punishment right out of the gate, they are going to either rebel or find a way to play behind our backs etc...I have been fairly strict with screen time from the get go, so many other kids kinda look at my kids funny when they say they are not allowed to play Call of Duty or Grand Theft Auto, it really scares me how many kids parents dont care enough about their kids or are ignorant to the effects of too much of anything. Good for you for being aware and taking steps to solve it...

 

[3pletprincesses]

My mom is having the same problem with my 16 yo brother. He will spend many many night playing and yes it's games like Call of duty where you find yourself commited to a group. I think it's hard for them to walk away and maybe living the others in trouble because he left KWIM. Not good for them but in the other hand, they are not doing anything bad. they could be out in the street causing problems. Maybe try to limits the internet access or if it's a regular game and not online, take the power wire with you after a certain time.

 

[Shir Kahn]

I think addicted is the wrong word. Might be a bit strong.

http://www.thefreedictionary.com/addicted

I work in the gaming industry and I will recommend to you the same thing I do to all parents. Get educated on the subject. Find out what games he plays, look into the content. Google it. Sometimes we need to make decisions for our kids.

Games are no worse then any other form of entertainment. It falls to us parents to regulate them just like anything else.

Someone in this thread mentioned that your son is most likely playing a game like Call Of Duty. This game ends up in kids and teens hands more then any other game on the market. This is a mature rated game not to be sold to anyone under the age of 17. Yet parents pass it off because "its just a game".

Anyways, set up a schedule. Eg, 3 hours outside gets you 2 hours on the xbox or whatever.

Good luck.

I'm not a parent yet, but I've given this some thought. I agree with this type of idea. Let your kids earn their time each day by doing other things for set amounts of time. I would weight different activities. The more active the kid is, the more time is accrued. Let them bank it, perhaps even with physical tokens to put in a jar of some sort. One hour outside running around with friends gets you a 20 minute red poker chip. Mow the lawn, another red chip! Unsolicited help may or may not earn a chip. Going for a 30 minute bike ride might be worth a blue chip worth 30 minutes.

On the other hand, chips can be taken away. Finding your kid up playing the game at 4am when they aren't supposed to be equals double time chips taken away. So if bedtime was 11pm, that's 5 hours x 2, 10 hours of gameplay gone! Chores not done when they were supposed to have been, there goes a chip! Bad report card with failing grades, the jar gets emptied completely and they have to rebuild their stock.

I know this would likely have a million reasons why it wouldn't work quite as smoothly as it might sound, but this was just a rough idea of how I would lay out the rules. It can obviously be tweaked however it needs to be. One thing that occurs to me is to keep a log of chips going in and out, as the first thing I would have done in this situation if I were the kid would be to buy a batch of poker chips!

 

[bankr63]

Shir Khan,

When you DO have kids, you have a great future as a fair and equitable parent. There may be a couple of flaws in the plan, but I am sure you will adapt it; overall I think it wise fair and equitable, and it has some great lessons about work, reward, earning, saving, etc.

Hope it works as good as it sounds!