I stepped in dog **** (aka dirt) last night….

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charlie,nj

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I took my 2 sons trick or treating last night around my “civilized” gated development. There is a rule that your dog can only do his business in the street and that you need to pick up afterwards. Well someone didn’t follow that rule yesterday and I have the stinky size 13 New Balance sneakers to prove it.(I would have gladly traded what I got for Halloween for Charlie Brown’s rock, any day)

We take our shoes off at the front door and put them in a basket like contraption. Luckily I did so last night. This morning we all woke up to an awful smell. We blamed one of the pumpkins that was sitting on the fireplace. One looked as if it was rotting. (my son’s of course accused each other of stinking up the joint with candy farts)

It wasn’t until I was in my son’s kindergarten classroom that a very observant Parker (little punk) said, “Hey Nicholas your Dad stepped in dog duty”. Well of course the whole class laughed me right of the room. (ha ha ha ha ha times 10) The teacher even crossed her fingers as to say “shame on you, you stepped in dog dirt”.

Outside of school I removed the offending sneaker and placed it in the trunk of my car. I would have to come up with a plan to deal with it before I got to work. I parked my car in the furthest spot I could find. I got out of the car and slowly opened the trunk. My god the smell could of knocked you over. (does the dog dirt smell get stronger as it ages?)

I attacked the mess with a half bottle of Windex and paper towels. I must admit the Windex did the trick. I guess Windex is keeping its dog dirt removing ability secret. (sort of like the Skin So Soft being a great insect repellent)

The moral of the story is: Dog owners please pick up after your dog. ...or even better yet Hey Bozo watch where you are walking.(hey this thread could have been inspired by Tony-NJ’s Flush thread) (same difference)

The last time I stepped in dog dirt was when I was taking my college entrance exams. In the middle of the test the moderator smelled something he walked up to me and made me take off my sneaker and put it in a brown paper bag. I had to finish the test with one sneaker on. Talk about embarrassing.

PS- trick or treating was boring…we didn’t find any dead guys…
 
ROFL! The holidays wouldn't be the same without you here to tell your stories, Charlie. :)
 
LOL Charlie! So sorry that you had to go through that embarrassment, but you sure do to tell the greatest stories! Always love reading about your adventures. :teeth:
 
<font color=navy>:earseek:

Ahhh, another memorable Halloween, even if you didn't find any dead people.


So, did your ds join in the laughter, or did he try to hide? :p
 

Sorry dude! LMAO!!!! It must have been a sight - having 10 5 year old's laughing at you!!!!:eek:
 
OMG Charlie, you and I need to get together a campaign against dog owners that leave little "presents" in unsuspecting places!!!

Wednesday night:

SO had just came home from work and we were supposed to be going out to dinner and to get pumpkins. I was ready when he got home (late, I might add). I had been on the phone with my mother who wanted to know if I had gotten a package she had sent. I realized I didn't check my mail today. SO had some business phone calls to make so I leave to get the mail. We live in a large apartment complex. The mailboxes for our build is located with 2 other building's mailboxes in front of the building next to ours. I put on my jacket and left to get the mail. It was dark outside by this time. The mailboxes are on a cement walkway, but they face out to the street and there is a small section of grass in front of them. Being lazy I guess, I decided to walk over the grass as opposed to around the curve and up onto the sidewalk from the backside. I got the mail and went back home. Our apartment is on the second floor, but we have our own garage and inside carpeted stairs up into the apartment. I walked up these stairs, into the kitchen, the living room, the hall, and the office where I sat down to wait for SO to finish his calls. As we are leaving we see this big brown stain on the hall carpet that wasn't there a minute ago. Turns out I had walked into a HUGE pile of it outside and it stuck to my tennis shoe. I got it all over the apartment. SO was laughing his head off at me. He helped to clean up the stairs, hall, and office while I took off my shoe to clean it. I then realize I had gotten some on the bottom of my jeans too (YUCK!!!) so off they came. I am standing in the kitchen trying to clean this off my shoe, and I take my jacket off. I get a scrub brush out from the cleaning supplies and start working on getting it out of the crevices. Big mistake!!!! HUGE mistake!!! Ever taken a toothbrush with pastey water on it and flicked the bristles? YUP!!! I inadvertantly flicked the wet poopy bristles onto my shirt (I was wearing a white turtleneck) and the tops of my now bare legs. I was so grossed out by this. I am fuming at this point. I am ready to call up the apartment office in the morning to report this leaving of dog poop in the grass. (It is apartment policy to pick up after your pets). This whole time SO is just cracking up. I think people who leave their animal's droppings on public property are dispicable creatures not worthy of sharing the planet with me!!!!
 
I have a friend who throws her shoes away when anyone in the family steps in doggie doo. It's hard to clean out all those little cracks and crevices isn't it? We use a pointy stick and the hose, just be careful not to get it sprayed back onto you.
 
Toothpicks, Charlie. Toothpicks.


To be disposed of after using.

It's right on the sides of the package......:p
 
Stay on the sidewalks next time, charlienj . . .

Really, you have the most INTERESTING Halloween stories . . .
 
Charlie
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Hmmm sounds like some of you had interesting "treats" for Halloween!!!!:p
 
Funny stories!!

On a more serious side though, I'm proud to say that I take my dog's "doo" seriously.. Found these neat little white "doo" bags - 100 for a dollar - and it makes cleaning our yard so easy.. Stick your hand inside the plastic bag, pick it up, and slide the bag inside out and tie it up..

I HATE stepping in that stuff!!
 
charlie, I'm glad we're seeing you more often. Your posts, whether serious or funny are always good to read. :)
 












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