I need some advice... Very long.....

[minnieandmickeymouse]

My mother didn't raise me, at age 6 she couldn't "handle" me and gave me to my father (they had just gotten divorsed). So I was raised by my father all my life without my mother really in my life. I would see her maybe 2 weeks out of the year ( and they ALWAYS turned into a disaster!) Anyway, I grew up hating her. She is still not really in my life. An email now and then, very rare, and phone call. I don't FEEL or THINK of her as a mother at all, I pretty much think of her as a "birth" mother.

2 years ago, I mentioned to her I was taking my son to WDW (she lives in FL. I think 3 hours from DW) I didn't think she would INVITE herself to go with us! I can't ever trust when she says she is going to do something b/c most of the time she doesn't. So when she said she might stop over to see us at WDW, I didn't think she would. WELL, the first night I was there, my son and I walked off the bus, and she WAS THERE!! Waiting for us!! She knew we were staying at ASMo. Then she ended up staying my whole vacation!!
Needless to say, I didn't have the best time I could have. It would be like having a vacation with someone you hardly know, or like!

So I didn't tell her last year, when I took my daughter to WDW.

BUT I sliped last night on the phone, and told her we would be down there in Sept.

I don't want her to go. I want to spend my precious time with MY DD, ALONE! I take these vacations with ONE of my kids once a year b/c I have 4 kids, and this is OUR time together ALONE to BOND!!!!

I was so stupid for letting it slip out, now I don't know what to do.

I don't want to hurt anyones feelings, although, I really shouldn't give a dam if I hurt her feelings, but that's not the type of person I am.
How can I make this better? How do you tell someone you don't want them with you? What can I do/say????? HELP!!!!

 

[SunFloridaDisney]

Change your reservations?

Seriously, that's a tough one, maybe just have to bite the bullet and tell her straight out that you'd prefer to spend alone time with DD.

Good luck.

 

[LadyBears]

Did you tell her WHEN in September or did you just tell her the month??
You could always switch hotels - let her stand outside ASMo for the entire month while you stay at the Pop. Disney is such a big place - it would be highly unlikely to "run" into her everywhere. If you said you were going to Epcot on a Monday - go to MK instead. Simple little things might just do the trick without you having to change the travel dates.

Good Luck!

 

[holycow]

Sorry but with this one if you can't tell her you don't want her there then I would lie and call and say your plans have changed and you don't know when you are going...then go anyway....That is a shame you had to slip up and let her in on your plans...

Hope you have a great trip anyway!

HC

 

[lulugirl]

Does she know exactly when you will be there? If she brings it up again, I would be very evasive about your plans.
Don't allow her to intrude on your vacation, it should be fun and stress-free for you and Dd!

 

[lillygator]

I am not sure what the "rule" a WDW is but my mom had always been able to get my same hotel and next door or connecting without me telling her....

I would just explain that you only take one child per trip as it is a special time for the two of you and that she could maybe join along sometime in the far future?

 

[4nana]

Sorry you are going through this .

Granted, I haven't walk a mile in your shoes, but personally, I think honesty is always the best policy. I'd explain to her, you use this yearly WDW trip for bonding time with one of your children at a time. Otherwise she will think it's acceptable and invite herself yearly, and continue putting a damper on your trips.

Perhaps if she wants to stay in touch and get to know you, maybe someday in the future, if you find it in your heart, you could do a girls weekend. Otherwise, I would stick with my family tradition and not feel guilty at all. Good luck, I hope it works out for you.

 

[Alicnwondrln]

call her back and tell her the truth you dotn want her there and its bonding time for you and you dd