I can't sleep and need advice...

[RNMOM]

You have no responsibility to stay in a place that is not fit to habitate. Move. Today if possible. Let her worry about finding a roommate. If you can, give her the next month's share of rent to help her out but you aren't obligated to do this.

More importantly, how do you avoid moving all the bugs with you? They may have taken up residence in your clothing, boxes, anything. I would suggest you put as much as possible in garbage bags and leave them there as long as possible. Pick a suitcase of things to live in for a couple weeks and leave the rest to isolate. I would suggest looking on the web how to get rid of the bugs. Perhaps there is a site for 'how to avoid moving roaches with me' or something like that. I know with lice you need to leave them in plastic bags for 2 weeks but it probably depends on the life cycle of each insect. Good luck.

Move, just move and let this irresponsible girl deal with her own life.

 

[Mickey's Minion]

Thank you EVERYONE for your help and advice. I'm trying to work out final details of where I will be moving before I tell her I am moving out and attempt to find someone else. Thanks again. I love the DIS.

I would just move out and not worry about finding somebody else. Not to blow anything out of proportion, but you do not want to be the one responsible for setting somebody up in an apartment with illegal activity going on, no matter how slight it may be. Whether or not one believes pot is harmless, except in certain medical situations, it is still illegal.

If you were moving out because you just didn't like the place, you had a personality conflict, or something else that involved you in any way, then I would certainly think you had an obligation to find a replacement or fulfill your verbal agreement. But that all goes out the window with illegal activities.

With today's litigious society, protect yourself. Let the roommate deal with the consequences of her actions.

 

[sharbear]

I would just tell her that while you have no problem with what she does (smoking, strange men, drinking) it's not your kind of lifestyle and makes you uncomfortable. You are sorry but you think it's best if you moved on for the next few months. You may be labeled as a prude but that's a heck of a lot better as the opposite and what do you care anyway!!

I have kids the same age as you who would not be comfortable in the same situation. I would just tell her that you didn't realized that she smokes and that it just make you uncomfortable. Hey I would even tell her that you are a prude and that it just isn't for you. No problems, it's just not what you are into and that you are really sorry.

I'm a fan of honesty. I figure that you won't interact with this girl and I wouldn't try to find her another roomate. She can go on craigslist or figure something out. This is the same advice I would give my own kids and they would be outta there in a NY minute!

 

[Pumbaa_]

I agree, I would not attempt to find a replacement. No one should stay with this woman until she gets her act together. Bringing strange men home is the one that would scare me the most!

 

[AlohaPolynesian]

Thanks again everyone. I'll let you know what happens!

 

[BelleWDW]

Thank you EVERYONE for your help and advice. I'm trying to work out final details of where I will be moving before I tell her I am moving out and attempt to find someone else. Thanks again. I love the DIS.

We're just your surrogate Mothers. honey.

 

[KiKi Mouse]

Make your arrangements to move out with the other friend. Then tell the roomie that you are moving out. You don't owe her an explanation other than it isn't working out for you. Use the bugs as the reason if you really have to...move out and never look back.

 

[KAMKIM]

I know this is difficult because you dont want confrontation, but you owe her nothing...give her a months notice (pay for a month and leave - you dont need to live there any longer) it is NOT your responsibility to find someone else to live there. You guys are young and in college she probably didn't expect it to be a life long commitment.

 

[sbsteel]

.

 

[Lionqueen2]

Considering the circumstances, I'd just get out as soon as I could pack. You don't owe this girl anything.