How old would you consider to be too old for siblings (opposite sex) to share a bed?

[SandrA9810]

Really weird in both situations.

Well there's only one boy in my family, my brother, but he's handicap (so it's different with him).

Vacations always have bed sharing just because there's usually not more than 2 beds. There's no way some one's plopping down an extra $100 or so a night for a third bed. It's usually my grandmother, my aunt, and me on road trips. For a few hours of sleep, I'd rather be more comfortable in a regular bed than on a rollaway.

 

[Robbi]

I cannot find the right words to post how creepy this is- gives me the shivers and not in a good way.

 

[leebee]

The only time I have known of older siblings sharing "space" was a friend who shared a room with her older brother until she went away to college. They grew up/lived in a 2br apartment with their parents, on the 27th floor of an apartment building in Queens. Sharing a bedroom was a necessity. Although it was one room, they installed curtain rods in the ceiling to make a walkway from the door to the "inner" sleeping area, and of course there was a partition to separate the sleeping areas, so while they were physically in the same room, it was partitioned into private areas as much as possible. However, they NEVER shared the same bed! OP, this is just wrong, on so many levels. It certainly makes you wonder about their upbringing, and their parents.

 

[luvmy3]

To be honest, even at their ages I wouldn't see an issue with them sharing a bed. In a normal brother and sister relationship there wouldn't be anything going on other than sleeping. There aren't really many examples as to why they could be sharing a bed, but I'm sure there are some innocent ones out there. You know they had a party at their house, and they both just passed out. Or they are on vacation and they cant afford an extra room. Or they have a house full of guests and grandma needs her bed, and all the other beds and couches are being used. I would think its a little odd, but I wouldn't think of it as gross.
However since the sister said its because she is scared and lonely I find their situation downright disturbing.

 

[FireDancer]

Everything about the situation makes the baby Jesus cry but the leap to incest is a bit odd on a creepy level.

 

[focusondisney]

Well, at least I have the comfort of knowing that if I am a prude, I have the rest of the Dis to keep me company in that category.

One of those rare Dis moments when we all agree!

 

[Disney Doll]

At age 5 no biggie.
19 & 20?
Weird.

 

[aprilgail2]

My kids stopped sharing a bed on vacation by the time they were school aged, maybe 5 -7 years old. If we had to share beds, it was me & DD, DS with DH. I can't imagine siblings that age sharing a bed. I have a brother; never wanted to share a bed with him because I was scared or lonley.

I agree- I don't even think that after that age opposite sex siblings should be sharing a bedroom never mind a bed! Personal space should be given!

 

[Imzadi]

Is that family from another country or culture? I know a couple Spanish/Hispanic families where there of about 6 - 8 people in each family that all live in one room/studio apartments.

I can't imagine it. I have problems needing space from my cat sometimes. But, for them it's normal. I don't think there are 6 beds in one room. There'd be no place to walk. Unless they got triple bunk beds. So I figure many of them share the same bed(s).

 

[Illuminations_Rocks]

Especially weird at home.
I have a brother who's 3 years older than I am. We did still "share a bed" in our teen years whilst on vacations with our parents. However this pretty much resulted in literally only sharing the bed space. We each had our own covers (one person took the covers from the bed, slept under those, and the other person slept on top of them with some other blanket on top) and were soooo not touching. Of course this is at least a queen size bed; I don't recall anything less. Didn't weird me out in the least. Though I found him rather annoying but that's about all!

 

[rockawaybeachgirl]

The only time I have known of older siblings sharing "space" was a friend who shared a room with her older brother until she went away to college. They grew up/lived in a 2br apartment with their parents, on the 27th floor of an apartment building in Queens. Sharing a bedroom was a necessity. Although it was one room, they installed curtain rods in the ceiling to make a walkway from the door to the "inner" sleeping area, and of course there was a partition to separate the sleeping areas, so while they were physically in the same room, it was partitioned into private areas as much as possible. However, they NEVER shared the same bed! OP, this is just wrong, on so many levels. It certainly makes you wonder about their upbringing, and their parents.

This was us. Not everyone with different-sex siblings were 'rich' enough to have separate rooms. I shared a room with my brother until I was 18 and left for college (we were 4 years apart) and we are both fully-functioning members of society. but a bed? As others have said, maybe on vacation but never permanently. And defintely not bc we wanted to! It seems strange to me at 19 and 22.

 

[minkydog]

To be honest, even at their ages I wouldn't see an issue with them sharing a bed. In a normal brother and sister relationship there wouldn't be anything going on other than sleeping. There aren't really many examples as to why they could be sharing a bed, but I'm sure there are some innocent ones out there. You know they had a party at their house, and they both just passed out. Or they are on vacation and they cant afford an extra room. Or they have a house full of guests and grandma needs her bed, and all the other beds and couches are being used. I would think its a little odd, but I wouldn't think of it as gross.
However since the sister said its because she is scared and lonely I find their situation downright disturbing.

My young adults would sleep in the car befor they slept in the bed with each other! And if my DD19 ever expressed that she "needed" her brother to comfort her and cure her lonliness, well, there would be some serious conversation about that.

 

[luvmy3]

My young adults would sleep in the car befor they slept in the bed with each other! And if my DD19 ever expressed that she "needed" her brother to comfort her and cure her lonliness, well, there would be some serious conversation about that.

My teen dd would never share a bed with either of her brothers, she'd sleep on the dirty hotel room floor before that would happen. (thank goodness for roll away beds ).

 

[LisaR]

I think the part that makes this even creepier than the obvious is that she is doing this when she is "scared or lonely." To me, that takes it to a whole new level of ewwwwwww!

 

[DawnM]

I am not following.......

Everything about the situation makes the baby Jesus cry but the leap to incest is a bit odd on a creepy level.

 

[elaine amj]

I don't find it all that weird on vacations - but at home because she's "scared" and "lonely" is weird. Then again, this is very third hand and if you ask her directly, she might have a much more innocent answer....like she's deathly afraid of thunderstorms and crawls in with her brother when there's a bad storm.

I have a friend from India and she sometimes does inappropriate things like this with her kids. She would have her 10yo DD and 11yo DS bathe together on vacation to "save time" and because they "don't mind it". She also still wiped their bottoms after going to the bathroom up until the age of 9 or so, and of course they still sleep together any night they want to.

I've told her that all of that was strange to me as an American. I'm not sure if those were things she was raised with/her culture or if it's just her.

I'm Asian, and I do a lot of stuff that Americans find very strange with my kids.

My DS actually complains because he has to sleep by himself in his own room while my DD gets to sleep with her grandma. He still gets scared at nights and would much prefer to sleep with someone, anyone! So some nights he convinces his big sister to sleep in the spare bed with him. A privilege for him his manipulative big sister goes to great lengths to make him earn lol!

I wouldn't think anything of a 10 and 11 year old sleeping together in the same bed. If they still liked to be together that much, I'd be so thankful rather than having them fight endlessly. I always highly encourage my kids to spend time together and every once in a while will stop them from hanging too much time with their friends and encourage them to make time to spend together.

That said, I doubt I would encourage mid-teens and up to share the same bed. My brother and I did occasionally in our teens, but that was typically vacations or big sleepovers. Never thought anything of it.

 

[sookie]

Once a sibling is past puberty, it is no longer OK.

 

[Balancan]

I guess when I think about it as long as it is just bed sharing there is nothing wrong with it until some gets uncomfortable.

 

[mmackeymouse]

The "scared and lonely" thing is a bit of a red flag.

That said, my uncle's family is DVC, and they always go in a 1BR villa. The brother and sister are now 24 and 23 respectively. The parents still take the Master (and why not? They paid for it, good for them to choose comfort for themselves) and the kids sleep on the pullout in the living room.

They don't go for a 2BR (unless we go with them) because of the $$/points, and they'd rather go more often and in close quarters than have a bigger space and go less often.

I personally never thought a thing of their sleeping arrangements till this thread. It never dawned on me as creepy and inappropriate. There is a Bible verse that states, "To the pure, all things are pure." Or in more secular language, "Ignorance is bliss." Either way, I guess if you've never considered the creepiness factor, it wouldn't seem that odd or be uncomfortable.

 

[crashbb]

I am not following.......

I assume it was in relation to Minkydog's post wondering about when the girl would become pregnant.