How do you get a child to stop talking??

[tiggerlover]

I have a child whose talking is to the point it is out of control. DS(8) talks entirely too much and now he is bothering the teacher at school. He ALWAYS has something to say and he never knows when to stop. At school he sometimes is talking when the teacher is talking or if he is at a point where he is allowed to talk, he is talking too loud and gets in trouble for that. Tonight for example we were playing UNO (DH, DS and I) and DS's talking just got to be too much so we told him he had to tone it down, and only talk when play was necessary, but he would stop for a bit and start right back on with his unnecessary talking. HELP...I don't know how to solve this problem!

 

[Cantw8]

crazy glue his lips....that should work.

 

[BWVDenise]

I know EXACTLY what you mean!!! My ds sucks the oxygen right out of the room!! Sometimes I feel like my ears are going to start bleeding! If you find a solution, please share! Meanwhile, know that you are not alone!!!!

 

[fun & fancy free]

Funny you should mention ALONE. When My dd (5) wakes in the am she is non stop. She even talks in her sleep. I am hoping that this will taper off but by the looks of things she has only just begun. I sometimes get a babysitter even though I am dog tired just to have some peace & quiet. I know it sounds awful but a person does what a person has to do. By the way my husband thinks it is hereditary.

 

[TheBellhop]

Always give her food!!! That way, when she has food in her mouth and tries to talk, you can say, "Don't talk with your mouth full, sweety!"
Hahaha

 

[Rippington'sFan]

Originally posted by tiggerlover
I have a child whose talking is to the point it is out of control. DS(8) talks entirely too much and now he is bothering the teacher at school. He ALWAYS has something to say and he never knows when to stop. At school he sometimes is talking when the teacher is talking or if he is at a point where he is allowed to talk, he is talking too loud and gets in trouble for that. Tonight for example we were playing UNO (DH, DS and I) and DS's talking just got to be too much so we told him he had to tone it down, and only talk when play was necessary, but he would stop for a bit and start right back on with his unnecessary talking. HELP...I don't know how to solve this problem!

Does he take after his mom? LMAO

 

[tiggerlover]

I am serious, this is a real problem and I just don't know what to do. Now that the teacher is sending notes home about it I am getting a bit worried and don't know how to control it. Scholastically he is doing wonderfully, his papers are mostly A's and he just tested at the 4.9 (4th grade 9th month) in reading and he is only in 3rd grade, so I know the talking is not effecting his learning, just disrupting the teacher.

Denise, is your DS sensitive to the red #40 too, I wonder if there is a link? Do you think chocolate has anything to do with the red#40 too, I have been wondering?

Rippington'sFan, naw, not me.

 

[HollyJoy]

I don't know, but if you figure it out, PLEASE, PLEASE, let me know!

 

[LuvN~Travel]

That would definitely be a cure worth paying for! Our ten year old is like that. You can't think for his talking!
Kim

 

[Lizzydoll73]

Duct tape works well for me.

 

[mtblujeans]

I have a DS like that! He just turned 13. I keep stuffing food into his mouth and it slows him down, but only a little. He only "rattle on" when he is in familiar territory tho'. He says he wants to be a doctor! CAN YOU IMAGINE??? I feel sorry for who ever he works with when he "grows up" and leaves our home!! Maybe college will quiet him down....or kill him!! Heavens!!!

Edited to add: Maybe it is a maturity thing. My DS is in 8th grade and much, much younger than his peers. Maybe they outgrow it....??

 

[tiggerlover]

Originally posted by mtblujeans
I have a DS like that! He just turned 13. I He only "rattle on" when he is in familiar territory tho'.

Maybe that is why the first two weeks of school were great, he was the new kid in a new school. So maybe it is good because he is feeling comfortable, but darn....I need to do something before his teacher kicks him out or something.

 

[mtblujeans]

Meet with the teacher. Tell him/her you are at a loss. The two of you together can figure something out. She has the education of knowing what to expect from the age group and you are very, very familiar with DS. The two of you can figure something out, I'll bet! I rely HEAVILY on my guys' teachers to help me understand them at different phases. And they have always come through for me! Teachers are great!!

 

[BWVDenise]

Debbi,
Since my dd has the dye problem, I don't keep foods in the house that have it, so my ds doesn't get it either-- therefore that isn't it. As far as chocolate, I have read that some chocolate contains vanillin which can affect some people (read that on the Feingold website), and of course there is the caffeine, too. So far, the teacher hasn't complained so I don't know if he talks that much in school or just at home. I hope you can figure out how to settle your ds down.

 

[Trish5768]

You don't, trust me, my DD10 has been talking non-stop since she was 1.

 

[HughJackman'n'me]

....Duct-Tape Patrolees ~

Wanna take this one??


But seriously, maybe you can suggest to the teacher a "Behavior Modification" program. She (or he) will have to start out with 'tiny bites' at first. Let's say, if your child successfully stays quiet for 5 minutes ( I MUST stress 'small steps' in the beginning) have the teacher discreetly place a popsicle stick in a can or jar that your child has decorated. When your child has collected, say, 10 sticks, the teacher can reward your child with a tiny treat (a small puzzle, a "get-out-of-homework" pass, etc.) Remember, the key is to reward positive behavior. Eventually, the length of time can be extended to 20 minutes, 1/2 hour, etc. Also, the teacher can give your child (as well as the other students) a "free talk" period at the end of a lesson, so they have another goal to work towards.....good luck!

 

[ksjayhawks]

Have a meeting with the teacher alone and discuss what to do. Then have the teacher explain the plan to your son, with you present.

Our son had the same problem. In first grade the teacher put a STOP sign on his desk. When he was starting to get out of control, she would move by his desk and place her hand on the stop sign. It took a while for it to work, but it was great! He needed that visual clue to know when he needed to stop and think about what he was doing.

Other teachers have used similar "clues" and it got so much better! Now we only occasionally have that problem at school.

Basically he needs to learn self control. If he cannot learn to follow the rules that are set about talking--at home and at school--then there has to be consequences. You know what will work with him--losing tv, game boy, friends over, play time, not playing the game with the family. If he knows that there are consequences to his actions (choices that he makes), he will want to change his behavior. You must be consistent in meting out the consequences and not give in for special circumstances. It shouldn't take too long to get this under control.

Work with him on problem solving. Talk about choices and the consequences that go with them. Emphasize that in life, if you make a choice, you must be willing to live with the consequences. If you don't like the consequences, then don't make that choice, make a better one!!!!! This is the perfect age for this!

Good luck!!!!!!!!

 

[ripleysmom]

If you have a concern about food dyes you might want to look into the Feingold Diet which basically targets eliminating those food that might be more likely to have dye that would affect children's behavior.

 

[klmklm]

get that child a journal! you may have the next great american novelist... (but make a rule, no talking while writing)

 

[The Mystery Machine]

I have 2 girls, my ears are bleeding...

Seriously, work WITH the teacher! When younger dd started K & in 1st the teachers "worked" with her.

When they did the first grade play last year, my dd had a speaking part, just one line. Well she was so LOUD that everyone laughed!

She is in 2nd and is doing better. It was more of a self-confidence thing for her.