How could my own MIL do this to me!!!

[chris1gill]

OMG, I am SO sorry, this is just terrible Now, does she have a compulsion to take things? I only worry that sometime in the future when she is in your house she will take something... sometimes compulsive people can't help what they do, so you have to be proactive to keep that sort of thing from happening... I agree with the person who said DON'T give her a key to your house What a terrible nightmare... I am so sorry...

 

[Amy]

This is why I like the DIS - I think my MIL is "out there" and then I read about someone else's in-laws and mine doesn't seem so bad after all!

I have nothing to offer but a hug and a repeat of what others have already said: make sure none of your in-laws have a key to your house, and guard those wedding gifts!

 

[Toby'sFriend]

ewwwww, it totally skeeves me out to think of my MIL touching my undies.

 

[ElizaB39]

Okay here is a funny story to add some humour to this really strange situation!

When my grandmother and her sister were both still living and in the same retirement home, my great aunt was sure that my grandmother was taking her dresses and wearing them. No amount of talking to my great aunt could convince her that her size 16 sister could not fit into her size 6 dresses! We still laugh about this, but at the time I know the two of them weren't laughing about it, they were angry!

to the OP! And, start shopping at the dollar store for all your "goodies", maybe that will prevent her from scavenging anymore... hee hee

 

[Tamarap]

Wow, that is shocking. Sorry that you have to even deal with something like that. I wouldn't even know what to say. I do know never to play the whose MIL is worse game with you.

 

[LindsayDunn228]

I'm a little confused? Is this your MIL, or your boyfriend's mother?

 

[lulugirl]

She sounds like a nut.

 

[jcsbama]

I'm a little confused? Is this your MIL, or your boyfriend's mother?

It's her future MIL....her fiance's mother

 

[UrsulasMyHero]

It sounds like your MIL to be is a bit jealous of the nice things that yo have. Unfortunately her offer to "hold stuff" for you turned neffarious and she decided to "keep them" and offer you a "little money". I'm glad you went with your instincts and found your items, and she must feel crushed that you found her out to be a liar. I can only imagine that your relationship with her is going to be strained from now on.

One small gesture would be to buy her one of the bras that she so desperately coveted from you, and if there's a pair of the shoes you don't like as much, offer them to her. it might help mend the fence. She was the one in the wrong, completely, and though you're under no obligation, sometimes it helps to be the one who goes above and beyond.

Best of luck to you in your new marriage. I wish you All the best!

 

[Mercy]

Are you sure you want to marry this guy??? You could be doomed to a lifetime of MIL-Hell!!!

 

[jcsbama]

I feel really bad for all of you. This is not a good situation to start out a marriage. But I have to wonder what made your DF look in his mother's dresser drawers for your items. Did he know something you didn't? Is there something from the past that you don't know about that made him think your items could be in her drawer's? I'm probably in left field thinking there may be a history, but I was just wondering.

 

[sajetto]

My DF and I always knew that his mother really liked my things. I don't know if there is any past history with her, but I do know that his grandmother (her mother) has a past of swiping things that don't belong to her.

I've always thought his mother was strange. She was never very friendly to me, but I ignored it. I don't see a reason to "hash" this out with her. I took every single thing out of her garage and now it is piled in our storage shed, but at least I know its safe with me. I don't want to hear anything from her. This is more than a bad judgement call, otherwise she wouldn't have lied about where they were and then when she was caught, why she took them.

 

[RUDisney]

It sounds like she's "just" a clepto with no other ill-intents, but, I want to offer advice because something similar happened to a friend of mine.

She and her DH found out a month before their wedding that his mother and father had used his SSN, etc., and had gotten a bunch of credit cards for which they didn't pay. They found out when they had applied for an apartment and were denied because of his credit. He had always paid his bills... except the ones that were run up without his knowledge or consent. His parents did this to their other children, too.

So, if I were you, if she had access to some of your personal information in her garage, I'd start checking my credit reports, and your DF's credit reports for a while to make sure that the only thing she was stealing was your bras and not your identity.

 

[imadisneyholic]

But I have to wonder what made your DF look in his mother's dresser drawers for your items. Did he know something you didn't?

I also wondered about this.

I can't believe your MIL would do that to you!?! I use to think I had it bad with mine but now I see I have nothing to complain about.

 

[L107ANGEL]

This is wrong on so many levels

 

[Disney Doll]

You know, I don't think anyone here is going to disagree with you that this is wrong. I mean, my goodness, she stole your stuff.

However, let's not miss the forest for the trees. You're marrying this woman's son. And, while there are those who will tell you that you are not marrying the fmaily, let me dispel that myth right now. You are marrying the family. Your DF's fmaily dynamics are going to impact your marriage, just as your family's dynamics will impact your marriage. For the sake of your DF and your marriage, you need to put this in the place where it belongs.

I am not saying to ever forget this, but you need to get to a point between you and MIL where you can be civil with each other. By all means, watch her like a hawk. I'd assign one of my friends or relatives to babysit her at the wedding, and I'd also decorate a nice locked box for people to put my wedding gift envelopes in. They'd probably be the hting to go...gifts would probably be reasonably safe because they are a lot more noticeable. I'd also put locks on all the doors in your home, so that when she is there, you can lock those areas to which you want to deny her access.

Meanwhile, poor DF!!!!!!!! His mother is a nutcase and has done this and he must be beside himself!!!!!! I wish you luck with this situation...it won't be easy to get past.

 

[olena]

Holy crap!

Why do I get the feeling that this won't be the last time we hear about this lady?

Proceed with caution!

 

[Dan Murphy]

Now THAT is just plain weird.

 

[j's m]

Ok, you win. That's got to be one of the strangest MIL stories I've ever heard. I thought my MIL was weird, this beats her hands down.

My initial impression, too, was that she could be a kleptomaniac and couldn't help herself. That's why DF looked in the house for your things, maybe past history. Could she really fit into your bras, nightgowns or shoes? If she couldn't, that would be more impulse klepto.

Good luck, be careful.

 

[luvwinnie]

This is very very strange and would freak me out...I mean your BRAS?!?!?!