To Segway, is human, to forgive one for having to wear the helmet, divine!
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Boy Jaime, I wouldn't want to be you right now. To mistakenly try to correct the Neb, and then be correctly set on the straight and narrow by a family member? wow. and you're a disser.
By the way, I'm still waiting to hear where your surgery is at. I'm starting to think it's a covert mission.
Ya know? In retrospect, I'm going to take that sentence back.
.Won thgir uoy eb ot tnab t'ndluow I ,emiaJ yoB
I WOULDN'T WANT TO BE RHONDA RIGHT NOW!
( boy, I hope somebody out there realizes what a pain in the butt it was to do that.)
Nah!
'Twas the night before Christmas, I'm not on the Dis.
It seems they decided, that things were amiss.
The fastpasses hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes "OhMari", soon would be there.
I in my fishing hat, Diane-fanny pack,
Had just settled down for a trip report snack.
Yeah, yeah, back to business.
Ok, so pictures taken, everyone is just zipping around in front of the Madagascar pavillion. And, honestly, it didn't take me long to get bored, at all. Diane is doing the loops around the pillars, and everyone else is just having the times of their lives it seems.
Me?
I have had it with the thing pulling up on me everytime I get moving.
Not sure if you know, but the machines are controlled by different "keys".
These keys are color coded.
The color of the keys determines the maximum speed your Segway will go.
Of course, as tourists, we get the slowest "key".
I think it's the blue one, but don't hold me on that. That one only goes up to 5 miles per hour.
The next one, ten. And the next color, twelve, I think. Anyway, I kept hitting my maximum, and it pulled back on me. And I got to the "why bother" stage.
I looked over at Diane, and she's having fun. That's fine. I'm going to put this thing to some good use now.
I zipped this thing over to the side of Ital,,,Borneo, and gee, a smoking secton!
I no sooner lit up, and of course, Diane found me. " What are you doing?"
"Wasting this precious time for a smoke?"
"Yep."
As I stood there, I noticed that lauren and no name guy were just standing there, off to the side, not far from me.
And she's got one of those new, enhanced Segways, that you don't turn with the grip, you turn by leaning.
hmm
No, it's not her Segway that I'm after, although I would have loved to try it.
But she also has a different color key hanging from it.
Ahhh!
If I can just get near her and switch keys?
Oh, the merry mix-ups that would occur when I take off screaming maniacally heading towards the Yacht and Beach Club, and she can't catch me!
And then my mind pictured the end of "Von Ryan's Express", when Frand Sinatra couldn't quite reach the railing of the caboose in time before he was shot in the back.
So, I nixed it.
Sorry, I know you had your hopes up.
However, hey, doesn't hurt to ask, right?
I zipped over to Lauren, with all the sauve e' faire I could muster,,,
" How YOU doin?"
Ok, actually, what I said was, " Hey,
Scooter Tutor, any chance I could try your brand new key in my brand new pair of roller skates?"
I would have never asked "Phil", our tutor from may.
He was the "ruder scooter tutor."
But I thought I might have chance with Lauren, the "cuter scooter tutor."
Yeah, right.
" IN YOUR DREAMS, BALDY!"
Well, she didn't exactly say that, but the end result was the same.
After everyone was done running into each other, it was time to quack, quack , back to Communiventions.
In review, I think women will like this tour more than men, especially if you've done the short tour first. And I was a little dissapointed cuz I thought we were going more behind the scenes in World Showcase.
But, it was fun. Only casualties were 12 petunias, 3 salvia, 4 geraniums that deserved to die, and a snapdragon.
Back on our own, we headed to living Seas, to try Crush again.
This time we got a standing room spot on the side, just as we walked up.
Everyone seemed to love the show, but, I have a hard time hearing it.
I wish Crush came with subtitles.
But, even more than Crush, I couldn't hear the little kids in the front, asking the questions.
And we head over to the Land.
At this point, I'm going to pause, just enough to say I am about to open myself up to public ridicule.
Kinda like what I just did to Jaime.
Yep , this is her chance for revenge.
You see, my trip reports collided in my head, may and september.
And I can't remember which trip it was that Living with the Land , was down.
It was either closed in may, or sept. But we did do it once. And this is kind of important, because they have now changed it, a lot. At least the boats.
It's like this.
As the girl that was "driving" the boat, and also teaching, informing, us, she used some lines that seemed in the long run, to come back and haunt her.
We were told about our responsibilities, to take care of nature, even plant life extinction isn't a good thing.
And she, herself, was about to become extinct.
They have recently replaced the "captain" with a digital voiceover, computer controlled boat, that has rendered her job obsolete.
But I didn't know it at the time, I doubt she did either.
So, I didn't get a chance to properly say goodbye to the dodo bird like I would have.
Stop it, I'm not that mean.
Least not yet.
We have about 40 minutes till our Soarin window opens, and we head over to Circle of life.
Hey, it's a show we havent done to death.
Now, here we go again.
Not my finest hour.
Yes, your right, what is my finest hour? I think it's 14 o'clock. And I'm still waiting.
Anyway, you enter this extremely little cleverly laid out theatre from the top.
Oh, Joy!
And then you walk down imitation stairs. Stairs? Fine. Landings? Fine.
Both together? Not so FINE! Each stair is two and a half steps wide.
Yep.
A Nebo accident waiting to happen.
I almost went down twice. Pulled some poor guy's prosthetic arm off his shoulder who was stupid enough to take an aisle seat.
Ok, that didn't happen, but I really almost did go down twice. As we neared an open aisle, the lady behind me actually said:
"Oh please sir, sit there, my heart can't take it anymore watching you."
Diane busted up laughing, and darn near threw me into the next seat.
And that woman followed in right with us to make sure I wasn't going anywhere.
After we were educated some more, it was time for our fastpass.
This time in the Soarin preshow, I didn't open my mouth when the tourists ask, " hey! who is that guy?" Nope. Not me. Uh uh. Not happening this time. Ok, I cracked, and slammed the guy up against the cage, and yelled, "IT"S Puddy, from Seinfeld!" And he was happy. And I was happy. Oh happy day.
After Soarin, it's time to use a counter service meal. And the plan is this is a "split" meal again. Yeah, I'm hungry now, and we can do this. We stay right there in the Land Pavillion, and head to the Asian Counter service window.
Then we found out why there wasn't any line there.
We walk up and Diane says to the waiting Asian girl standing there that we want to order lunch.
" Hokay", and she turns around and starts cooking things.
"Um, excuse me, we haven't ordered anything yet."
" Hokay"
I could see this was gonna get ugly, and was looking for the counter that I can busy myself with getting napkins and whatnot.
"Diane says we'd like the number 11, two choices of entries, plus two sides, a drink and a desert."
I had told Diane I want the sweet and sour, and rice for a side. That's it.
So, she tells the girl that. Uh uh, now she wont' move.
" But you must order 2 entries, and 2 sides."
"Yes, I know, this is the first, when you're ready I'll give you the second."
" Hokay, what is the second?"
Yep, that's what I thought was going to happen, so I cleverly told Diane, "Uh oh, looks like the soy sauce is almost gone at the counter, gonna start gathering the stuff up."
She just couldn't get it through to Epcot Rose to put an entry and side on the same plate, so she gave up. Oh, she used two plates alright, both entries on one plate, both sides on the other, and the desert on the third.
No Tiggerbell, I don't remember what the desert was this time either. When we got to the table, we just shifted it all where it belonged.
I'm not sure if it's because it was free, but it really wasn't bad, for a fast food place. And we both had enough that we wouldn't be hungry till dinner.
So far, the dining plan is working out just swell.
It's about ten to one now, and since our adr isn't until after Illuminations in Mexico, we head on back for a swim. I'm looking at the sky, "go ahead, make my day". Yeah, played this game before. It's clear now, but, we'll see.
coming up, "Oh Mexico, where art thou?" bye bye
Are you disappointed? 
Classic Nebo! "Scooter Tutor" 
